"NO RESONANCE FOR YOU, HUH?" Theodora gives me a
sympathetic look. "Disappointed?"
"Nope," I tell her, spooning more soup into my bowl. We're
all back inside the ship, sitting in the mess hall after the day's
hunt, and we're all still recovering from receiving our cores.
The moment mine touched my neck and slipped inside me—
something I prefer not to think about—I went unconscious.
Happens to everyone, I'm told. Now that I'm awake, I'm
noticing a few things.
One—I feel like I was hit with a sledgehammer. I'm exhausted
and achy all over.
Two—I'm freaking starving. I could eat a whole cow if
someone put one in front of me. As it is, I'm just chowing
down on all of the stew I can spoon into my bowl. I'm not the
only one. The red twins have been back for fourths and fifths.
Three—I'm no longer freezing my ass off. It's a little chilly
outside, but it's far more comfortable. Like a "crisp fall day"
cold instead of "naked in the Antarctic" cold. No wonder
Theodora and Zoe seem so unbothered by the chill weather.
Four—I think my eyesight is improving. Just like they
promised, instead of nothing but blobs, the stuff closer to me is
starting to take better shape. It's not much, but it's a start. I can
see Harlow's face, and she's pretty.
She also looks glum. "Disappointed that you didn't resonate?"
I can't help but ask.
Harlow makes a raspberry noise. "Me? Please."
I wouldn't blame her if she was. It's hard not to think about
right now. Veronica—clumsy, plain, quiet Veronica—sits next
to the big golden guy. The lion-haired one. They're resonating.
It started apparently the moment that Veronica woke up and
hasn't stopped since. There's a low thrumming purr coming
from both of them and it's so loud that everyone can't help but
notice. Veronica looks shy and embarrassed.
The big gold guy looks as if he wants to eat Veronica up with a
spoon.
I didn't want resonance for myself, but it's kind of difficult to
ignore how he's gazing at her. Even with my crappy eyesight,
it's obvious that he's utterly fascinated with her, and every
time she twitches, he reacts. I suspect if Veronica would let
him, he'd try to feed her. I watch them surreptitiously from my
seat. Even from here, I can see how bright red Veronica's
cheeks are. The big guy's sitting extra close to her, and as one
of the red twins walks past, he stiffens and gives him a furious
look for daring to stroll nearby. He's practically bristling with
possessiveness.
At my side, Harlow sighs. She sees it, too.
Yeah. If you ask me, I don't want resonance. But…that kind
of attention from a hot, sexy guy is tough to pass up.
"You think they're going to share quarters tonight?" Harlow
whispers between bites of stew.
I shrug. "It's none of my business." Though I admit, I'm super
curious, too.
"Oh please," Harlow says. "It's a small group. It's everyone's
business. Look at how they're all watching them, too." She
nods at the doorway and I notice that there's a bunch of coloured
guys standing nearby, arms crossed. They're watching
Veronica and her new boyfriend, too.
Chaperones. Good. I'm happy to see that. It means
that even if Veronica wasn't interested—which, damn, she'd
be crazy not to be—no one's going to force her into anything.
It makes me feel better. I shovel a bit more stew into my
ravenous belly. "Did anyone else resonate?" I ask, since
Harlow seems to have all the deets.
"Nope. Just those two. I think someone's got her eyes on one
of the red twins. What about you?"
I look back behind me carefully, to where the—very naked—red
twins are sitting. No one's sitting at their small table with them
in the mess. They both eat hunched over their bowls with
grim, methodical shoves of their spoons into their mouths as
if they're in a hurry. Neither one looks at his food, either.
They're too busy watching everyone else.
One looks in my direction and I hastily turn my attention back
to my food. I don't want to be caught staring. Seems rude,
especially when one of the parties is naked. "They seem…
nice." I can't think of anything else to say.
Harlow snorts. "And Wizkid's just a dog."
She's got a point. But I'm trying to stay positive. We've got
enough to worry about right now. Everyone's dealing with all
of this differently. Some people are kind of…nosy about all of
it. I finish my food and glance around. "Have you seen
Maria? Or Sandra? They're not eating."
Harlow shrugs.
Crap. I bet Maria's hiding again. She's struggling with
change—not that I blame her. "I think I'll go see where they're
at. Talk to you later."
"Don't forget that we're arriving at the shore tomorrow,"
Harlow reminds me. "Last day of ship life before we go all
primitive." She twirls a spoon in the air. "Goody."
Right. The ship is slowly crawling over land right now and
we'll be arriving at the coastline of the ocean in the morning
for part two of our "rescue," in which our new friends
promptly destroy the only spaceship we have.
I don't think anyone will be forgetting about that. "Thanks,
Harlow. I'll remember." Like I can go anywhere in the
meantime? What am I going to do, jump out of a moving
spaceship and hope to strike out on my own? I put away my
dishes because the tiny dining area on the ship feels a bit too
cramped with so many people inside, and I go to look for
Maria and Sandra.
Sandra's on her way back to get more food, an empty bowl in
her hands. "Are you not eating with the group?" I ask her,
curious. "Is everything okay?"
"I brought Gibson some food. I don't think he's been eating,"
Willa tells me in that soft drawl of hers.
"Gibson? Who's Gibson?" We've met so many people in the last
few days that they're all starting to run together. I mentally try
to place the harsh-sounding name with one of the dragon faces.
"You know." Sandra gives me an exasperated look. "The one
they keep tied up."
That's Gibson? I shudder, remembering those bright red—now
blue—eyes and the feral anger on his face. "Are you sure
that's safe, Sandra? He's not exactly happy about being here."
"Are any of us?" She shakes her head, her expression full of
sympathy. "He's just as freaked out as I am. He just shows it in
different ways. He needs a friend."
Here I was thinking he needed tranquillizers, but maybe Sandra's
right. Still, I don't trust it. "Just be careful, okay?"
"We're all in this together," she tells me simply. "He's lost his
home, too, and everything he knows."
And now I feel like an ass. I smile at her. "You're right. I'm
just worrying." I peer past her, and then ask, "You haven't
seen Maria, have you?"
"I think I saw her running down one of the back halls."
I bite my lip. "Thanks. I better find her before the red twins eat
all the stew."
"And I'd better get my friend a second bowl." She holds her
dishes up smiles, and heads on.
I pause, wondering if I'm being unfair. Gibson does creep
me out. But if Sandra's learned his name, maybe that's the first
step to calming him and being his friend. I know the others are
more concerned about him harming us than caring for him
overall. We've got too many people that are too helpless right
now. I get it. We're in a triage situation—you take care of the
most urgent stuff first and then worry about the trickier stuff
later.
I know Theodora, Zoe and the others are feeling
overwhelmed. I can see it on their faces. Zoe looks like she
hasn't slept in days and Kyros—the chief—seems frayed at
the edges. The hunters are either constantly watching over us
so we don't get hurt or hunting to feed and clothe us. Theodora, Mardok and Gibson are racing around the ship, trying to
salvage as much as they can before we trash it all in a blaze of
questionable glory. Twenty newbies is a lot to bring into a
small group, and everyone's pulled to their breaking points.
Which is why I'm trying to help.
Which is why I need to find Maria.
I head down the hall once more, looking for her. I start peering
into any human-sized nook or cranny on the ship, trying to
think like a frightened woman. If it were me, where would I
hide? I'd try to find the last place anyone would look for me,
of course. Someplace dark and quiet that I could disappear
into and just hide away from all my problems for a bit.
I think for a moment and then head for the cargo bay.
"Are you lost, Mey-leza?" One of the big coloured guys—Ronan, I
think—asks as I pass him in the hall. He seems friendly
enough, his expression open and honest. He has long, messy
braids, and I remember him telling the others yesterday that he
misses his mate because she usually fixes his hair for him. I
remember that, and I remember him talking about their kit
together. It makes me trust him a bit more, weirdly enough, to
hear that he's got a wife and family and he misses them.
But I'm pretty sure Maria wouldn't appreciate the dragon
company. She's still skittish around all non-humans. "I'm just
looking for my friend."
"Do you need help?"
I shake my head. "I think she's scared and hiding."
Realization dawns on his face. "Ah. That one. Mar-ee-ah."
Poor Mari. A legend already. "That's the one. I'm going to
find her and bring her back to the dining hall."
He nods. "I am heading that way. Come find me if you need
help."
"I will. Thank you, Ronan."
He grins to hear his name and looks boyishly human for a
moment before he gives me a little nod and then heads
onward. I relax. Maybe they're people just like us after all. Of
course, as he turns, his tail flicks back and forth as he walks,
and that quashes that thought pretty fast.
Human-ish, maybe. Not quite human.
I wait for him to leave, and then I head into the cargo bay. I
pass by each of the pods, running my hand along the surface of
one. How long was I in here for, I wonder. How did they take
me without me knowing? What would have happened if no
one had come to wake me up? I shudder at the thought. Even
now, though I'm not thrilled to be stranded here, I'd rather be
awake than in limbo, unaware of anything. That seems like a
special kind of hell.
One of the pods in the back has the lid pulled over it. I move
toward it, keeping my steps noisy enough that I won't be
sneaking up on Mari. When I come to the side, I hesitate, and
then knock gently. "It's me."
She opens the lid a peek and looks out at me with teary,
electric-red eyes. "What?"
"I came to see if you're okay," I tell her gently, pushing the lid
aside so I can see her. "Everyone's eating but you."
"I'm not okay." She sniffs, swiping at her cheeks. "I woke up
on a strange planet and someone put a parasite in me. Why
would I be okay with any of that?"
"I know," I say, patting her shoulder awkwardly. "I feel like
you do. I'm overwhelmed and I don't know what to think. But
it's better than being stuck in limbo."
"Is it?" She shakes her head, wiping away more tears.
"Because at least then I didn't know what was going on. At
least then, I wasn't afraid." Mari presses a trembling hand to
her forehead. "I wish no one had woken me up, you know? I
don't know that I can handle…all this." She waves a hand at
our surroundings. "I'm not brave like you."
Brave like me? I resist the urge to laugh hysterically. I'm
hanging on by a thread myself. I sigh and eye her pod, and
then start to climb in beside her.
"What are you doing?" she asks, startled.
"Seeing if this works," I tell Mari. "If I can hide away from all
of this for a few hours, I'm going to join you."
She gives a husky little laugh as I squeeze in next to her. "I
have to warn you, it doesn't. The hiding only helps a little."
"Ah, but it does help, right?" I lie down beside her, our
shoulders pushing into one another, and I squeeze her hand. I
know how she feels. The only reason I haven't broken down
sobbing myself is because one more crying person isn't going
to help things. Others need someone strong to look to, so I
might as well be that person. I give her hand another squeeze.
"It's going to be okay. I promise."
"Are you just saying that?" She sounds teary again.
"Yes?"
I get a laugh out of her, at least. It's something.