"So what jutsu will I be learning first? Fire breathing? Water blasts? What?" Naruto may have been unwilling to acknowledge the Fourth Hokage as his father at first, but the prospect of being trained by a Hokage, of all people, had turned him around quickly. Thoughts of surpassing Sasuke's flashy tactics danced through his head, along with a fantasy or two of Haruno Sakura. Arashi groaned inwardly.
Teenagers… Then he grinned as a thought came to him; had Naruto been paying attention to his father's expression, his enthusiasm would have vanished in a hurry. Absorbed in dreaming of kicking his rival to the curb, he missed the half-cruel expression that flashed across the Fourth's face.
"I think we'll start with an oldie but goodie, the basic Uzumaki family taijutsu technique. Haruka said her grandfather named this training course the Path of the Diamond Body (Kongou Karada no Michi)." The scenery shifted around them both, until it showed a large clearing dotted with trees of all shapes and sizes. Logs and nets filled with rocks dangled here and there from ropes. Bamboo poles took up much of the space between the trees. Were they for handholds? For balance training? Naruto looked around to get a better idea of what he might be facing. He didn't have to search for long.
"This doesn't look like a taijutsu training area to me…" His question ended as a log crashed into him from behind, sending him flying into a nearby tree.
"Oops. Must have missed that tripwire there, son." Arashi didn't have to laugh; Naruto could hear the undisguised mirth in his father's voice.
"What the hell kind of taijutsu style is this? Dueling with logs?"
"Nope. I'll let your mother explain." Arashi looked deeper into the clearing, to a spot where his younger self and Haruka stood, facing each other on top of the poles. Well, Haruka was standing, at any rate.
"What the heck is this supposed to accomplish? I don't feel any more like a diamond than when I began." Arashi didn't say much more; he was too busy dodging both his girlfriend's attacks and the other traps she was springing on him.
"Grandfather always was a little senile. He really should have given this training course two names, one being the Path of the Diamond Body, the other being the Path of the Invisible Body (Meimei Karada no Michi).
"There are two ways to get all the way through this course, from one clearing opening to the other. The Diamond Body was Grandfather's way; train your physical stamina and toughness up to a level where even these logs and rock nets would only feel like a tickle when they hit you." Who the hell would be that rock-headed OR that tough? Arashi had already been hit by more than a few logs; he wasn't in any hurry to train himself by letting them hit him again.
"Okay, so the Diamond Body's not my thing. What's the other Path?" Haruka smirked.
"Is the high-and-mighty Fourth Hokage afraid of a little pain? I can make it through this course just fine either way, you know." Arashi sputtered a weak denial, flailing his arms in exasperation.
"That's because you've been going through it since you were six!" Haruka waved a hand in dismissal.
"A mere technicality. Fine, fine, the other Path. The Path of the Invisible Body is to train your speed and agility (and balance, for that matter) to where you can't get hit, because nothing will be able to touch you. Grandmother came up with that when she got tired of having to bandage Grandfather's bruises all the time. My father and brother being as macho as they were, I was the only one who ever took her Path." Arashi was as tired of talk as he was of dodging traps.
"Let's see you run this course, then. Only I'm going to make it a challenge. You have to get hit by all five of the largest logs along the way, but nothing else. And if I see you grimace in pain even once, you lose. Of course, I won't be a total bastard about it; you can use all the tools you want. Kunai, manriki-gusari, you name it." Haruka snorted as she walked towards the beginning of the training course.
"If that's all you want me to do, you'd better be ready to buy me dinner tonight. And not at that cheap ramen stand, either." She reached into the sleeves of her ninja uniform, and then into her boots, and tossed all of her kunai at Arashi, who leaned out of the way. "I won't be needing any weapons."
"Then what will you be using, pray tell?"
"Haven't you heard, Hokage-sama?" Haruka smiled as she prepared to begin, but there was no humor in her eyes. "We of the Anbu are weapons."
She vanished in a blur, streaking into the clearing like a gust of wind. Arashi could hear the twangs and snaps as tripwires broke, but little else. There were no impacts of wood against flesh, nor had he expected any from Haruka. He glanced into the area where the first large log was located. As Haruka approached, she turned her body in mid-air, lashing out with a kick to trip the wire, and then bunching into a tight ball as the log swung out of the trees. When it struck her, he drew in a sharp breath in reflex, expecting to see her feel the pain of impact.
Uzumaki Haruka didn't even flinch. She simply uncurled herself, and bounced off a nearby tree, always moving forwards. Arashi just stood there gaping. Something tells me I ought to be damn glad this girl is on MY side.
The dangerous parts of the course still beckoned, nets and snares awaiting her all around. As she cleared a pine sapling, two rock-filled nets swung in from both sides, poised to crush her into a pulp. Even before he could shout a warning, it was over.
"Fire element! Chakra Kunai no Jutsu!" Twin spheres of energy formed in Haruka's hands, which she squeezed until they formed handfuls of glowing kunai that she hurled at the nets. The resulting explosion reduced the nets and their contents to a dusty cloud, which the kunoichi ran through without a second thought.
Naruto gazed at his mother's actions in awe, watching her move from tree to tree like a flash of light.
* * *
"She could kick my butt without breaking a sweat. Because I let her, of course," Arashi muttered.
"I'm so sure, Pops."
"Hmph. Well, anyway, I take it you get the purpose of the logs now?"
"Sure! When do I learn how to do those chakra kunai?" Arashi smiled; this time Naruto actually saw it, and regretted opening his big mouth.
"Oh, it'll come. All you have to do is go to the real-life Uzumaki training ground and master both the Diamond Body and the Invisible Body. Do that, and I'll teach you the Chakra Kunai no Jutsu. Hell, I'll teach you all the jutsus I know." Naruto's facefault shook the ground.
"WHAT????"
"Don't tell me you're chickening out already." That got his son's attention.
"Hell no! But why can't you teach me how do it here?"
"Naruto, Naruto, Naruto." Arashi wagged a finger at him like an old schoolmarm, tsking all the while. "We're in your mind. Anything I teach you here other than a jutsu would be worthless to you in the real world. Your body wouldn't get any stronger or faster, and your chakra wouldn't increase.
"The Diamond and Invisible Bodies are for you, and you alone to master. When you've done that, learning my jutsus and Haruka's will be child's play." Naruto wasn't sure whether to sulk or to wipe out his father's smug expression with a punch.
"Typical old man. All talk and no action."
"No son of mine is gonna get a shortcut to anything, except maybe the back of my hand," Arashi growled. "I'll tell you this much right now.
"We ain't the Uchihas, born with the Sharingan. We ain't the Hyuugas either, with that whacked-out Byakugan and taijutsu style. I didn't become Hokage because of my bloodline."
"Then why did they make you the leader?"
"Because I was the best at doing whatever had to be done, what they ordered me to do. You wanted something scouted? I could get in and get the information without disturbing a soul. Assassination? I wasn't your mother, but nobody ever escaped me. Bodyguard duty? None of my charges ever died anything but a death of natural causes. Bottom line, if it had to be done, I found a way to do it, even if it wasn't the most elegant or high-and-mighty means possible."
"So basically, they made you Hokage because you were a jack-of-all-trades who was too stubborn to give up on any of his missions." Arashi either missed the sarcasm in the statement or didn't care to acknowledge it. He simply chuckled.
"And boy, did it ever piss Orochimaru off that they chose me. Little ol' Kazama Arashi, the cause of creating a rank-S criminal missing-nin.
"Thankfully, Orochimaru only knows you're the vessel of the Ninetails. Man, can you imagine what he'd have tried to do to you if he found out you were my kid?" The queasy feeling in Naruto's stomach said he did know just that. Thanks a bunch, Pops.
* * *
"So where is the Uzumaki training ground? And the rest of Mom's family, for that matter? I know you said you were an orphan, but she sounded like she had a big family." Naruto looked over at his father as they rested on top of the cliff again, looking out over a memory of the Leaf Village at night.
"First things first, when you get outta here and finish this stage of the Chuunin Exam, go see the Third Hokage and tell him Kazama Arashi sent you. Then he'll know I've talked to you, and that I think you're ready to face the challenge. He's got my instructions about what to do, including unlocking the Uzumaki training ground for you. It's kind of a distance out from the regular fields and buildings, just like the old Uzumaki house and dojo were." Arashi pointed to a small cluster of lights near the base of the mountain where the Hokages were memorialized.
"They sure did love their secrets. Course, that bit 'em in the ass when the Ninetails showed up."
"What do you mean, Pops?" Arashi shook his head slowly.
"The destruction started from the outskirts of the village and headed inwards. The Uzumakis were the first to go, because they were the first to get attacked. Gramps Uzumaki bought it first, of course, hardheaded old coot that he was. Grams Uzumaki had already passed away, so I guess he wanted to join her. Your grandfather, Haruka's father, didn't make it out of the first week either.
"The rest of them were lucky. Haruka was on an Anbu mission and didn't get back until the demon had already started attacking. Your uncle Sentaro was on the other side of the village on guard duty, and we kept him from going to 'take his revenge' the night Gramps got killed. In the end, he got his wish anyway, but at least his death meant something. It bought me enough time to think up the plan that took the Ninetails out." The Fourth looked up at the sky, gazing at the constellations he'd long since memorized. They never moved, after all, frozen in his memories.
"You'd have liked them, I think. And you'd probably have made Gramps Uzumaki proud, as stubborn as you can get sometimes. I'll tell you all about 'em someday. Right now, though, I think you should be getting ready to go back to reality. That exam's not going to pass itself." Aw, man… Naruto laid back down, suddenly wishing he could stay longer, even if it was with his irritant of a father.
"Bah, you think this is it? I already told you I'm gonna teach you all those jutsus someday, didn't I? But you got people out there depending on you, and you gotta wake up eventually. Might as well be now." Naruto sat up slowly and looked at the bruises that still covered his body.
"And do what, Pops? Get my butt kicked by Orochimaru again?" Arashi snorted.
"Even I don't expect you to do anything against him. But I have a little something that'll serve you in good stead until you can start training for real. So listen up. This is the Kazama Code of Ninja Behavior. It saved my ass a time or three, and now it's gonna do the same for the rest of your life.
"Rule One: Know your objective. Orochimaru isn't it. Your job is to get that second scroll, get to the tower, and out of the Forest of Death. Get away from him, if he's still there, and concentrate on finishing the test. Sarutobi-sensei can handle Snake Boy, if he hasn't already."
"Rule Two: Know your limitations. Don't go getting into situations you can't handle. You find a team that you don't think you can take, move on until you find one that's more your level. You're not here for glory, you're here to survive, so don't take any losses you don't have to."
"Rule Three: Keep your emotions in check. They can help, but they can hurt you, inflame your mind. Best thing to do is compress all the things you're feeling into yourself, and think rationally. Only get passionate when you've got no other choice, and then let it all out. That can be a jutsu in itself." Arashi winked, to Naruto's confusion, and then went on.
"Rule Four: Defeat the weakest opponents first. The credit may go to the guy who kills the leader, but the glory hound who gets cut down from behind by a peon ain't remembered at all."
"Rule Five (and this is the most important one, kiddo): Never. Give. Up. I don't care how long the odds are, there's always a solution. Can't climb the wall? Go around. Go under. But keep on movin'. Once you lose momentum, you might never get it back again." Naruto nodded, listening with a respect for his father that was growing steadily (even if he would never have admitted it).
"That all? Seems I've got an exam to finish." Arashi opened his mouth as if to speak, but hesitated. Finally, he sighed.
"God, Haruka'd call me a wuss if she saw me doin' this…but I got one more unofficial rule for you."
"And that is?"
"Rule Six: Whatever happens out there, whatever obstacles you run into, don't you ever forget that I'm proud of you. Your mom would be, too. You're still a ways off from being the kick-ass shinobi we dreamed of, but you're on the right track. Now go back out there and show them all what Kazama Arashi and Uzumaki Haruka's son can do."
This time, Naruto was the one who grinned.
"You got it…Father."
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