As the door closed behind him, Peter felt his breathing grow quicker and more frantic before he began to make his way down the hall as the reality of the conversation began to set in.
He didn't even know where he was going at this point, he just didn't want to be there.
Someone quiet where he could just sit down and… and think for a bit. Think of how to digest everything that had just happened, if he even could right now.
God, how was he supposed to just go back to the festival after that?
He felt sick, even more sick than when the spider bit him.
Peter stumbled through the seemingly endless halls, he could feel his surroundings beginning to spin around him as he went further and further down the corridors of the stadium.
If his memory serves him right, he should be on the 3rd floor right now, right? Probably towards the outer edge of the structure where he was pretty sure waiting rooms were.
Yeah, he wasn't making it to Recovery Girl anytime soon, was he?
He continued on his journey to nowhere before ending up in a decently secluded area.
Putting his back to the wall, Peter dragged his shaking hands down his face as his breathing seemed to get more and more frantic.
This was a panic attack, just like the one he had after the nightmare about Mizuku.
Just what he needed.
That familiar sense of his chest being crushed appeared, Peter simply sliding down the wall and onto the floor.
Why today? Why today of all days did this have to happen to him?
It was supposed to be fun! Not actual training or anything! Just… dumb fun before internships!
But no, him actually enjoying himself wasn't in whatever vague and shadowy agenda S.H.I.E.L.D had, right?
Why him? He just got bit by a spider on a field trip! And this is what happens because of it?
Now he's gonna be the legal property of the Avengers and whatever S.H.I.E.L.D was? Because of how his quirk was, he was gonna be drafted into all of this?
Why was it always him?
Why was it him when he didn't want anything to do with any of this?! He didn't choose to have these powers! They've been messing up his life for as long as he's had them!
And now they pull him into this?
Just… damn it!
He didn't want this!
God, he just…
He didn't want this.
He never did.
Peter took as many calming breaths as his rapid breathing would allow, bringing his knees up to his chest and holding them close in a weak attempt to comfort himself.
It wasn't working that well.
The boy closed his eyes for a moment, trying his best to just… think for a moment and calm down even through the jumbled thoughts that plagued his mind.
It wasn't like he could run away from all of this, Tony Stark himself was the one to tell him he was a part of this mess.
If he was the one to do it, and if the Avengers worked for S.H.I.E.L.D, then he was screwed on just avoiding this whole thing.
Tony Stark had told him he was in line to work for the Avengers, and he just treated it like a joke!
Peter's future was getting screwed over and this guy didn't even care enough to take it seriously.
Tony Stark was one of his heroes, and he didn't even have it in him to take the fact he was screwing Peter over even remotely seriously.
And he just thinks that the chance to be an Avenger makes it all better? That giving him some dumb card with his number on it and an internship offer would make Peter be alright with what happened?
Fuck, he didn't want to work with the Avengers!
Anyone else would jump at the opportunity to work with them, but Peter? He didn't want that.
The Avengers were like… gods, larger-than-life figures who helped stop city-wide disasters and take down giant quirked monsters that attack a city and defend against terrorist invasions!
He… wasn't.
That wasn't what he wanted! That's not who he is or wants to be!
He doesn't want to be like Captain America or the Hulk or any of them!
But now he's being forced to do that when he grows up?
He's just gonna be thrown into S.H.I.E.L.D whether he wants to or not? Just because he got bit by a spider?
His throat felt tight at the thought, his eyes traveled to the back of his hand and looked at the two small marks on it.
Bite marks.
Those stupid bite marks were why this was happening to him.
They made him an 'Illegal Genetic Mutation' and got him caught up in all of this!
Damn it, why was it always him?
At that moment, anger began to bubble up inside him before being replaced by something that… Peter didn't even know what it was.
He just felt tired right now.
He was angry, and hurt, and scared, and overwhelmed and a million other emotions before, but now?
He was just so damned tired.
A few tears threatened to spill out of the corner of his eyes as the reality of the situation became more and more prominent in his mind, Peter quickly blinking them away as he took more and more deep breaths.
Could he even tell anyone about this? Ask for help from… crap, who could he even ask?
This was some sort of secret organization that the Avengers were in! They've somehow kept the existence of mutates hidden from the public.
This was just bigger than… anything in his life.
And he could do nothing about it.
His breath hitched for a moment. Peter hugging his knees tighter to his chest.
"Why is it always me…" He muttered in English, missing how his spider-sense buzzed lightly in the back of his head.
As he hugged his knees even tighter, the sound of soft footsteps came from down the hall he was sitting in, but he still didn't even look up.
He just didn't have it in him right now.
"Oh, there you are! Man, I've been looking all over you!" Nejire called from down the hall, making Peter's head snap up to face her. "Togata-Kun found a smoothie machine so I thought you'd want one! Why are you all the way over here? I-"
Nejire?
Weirdly enough, he didn't mind too much that she was the person that found him.
Once she got a decent look at Peter's face, she stopped mid-sentence and immediately flew over to him.
"Hey, Nejire." He greeted, looking at the wall in front of him as Nejire sat down.
A part of him wanted to be alone to digest all of this, you know? But another, bigger part of him…
That part wanted to just not think about it for a bit.
Just a bit.
"Did… something happen? No offense but you look terrible." She said, Peter found himself letting out a small chuckle that didn't have any actual humor in it.
Good thing his breathing calmed down because if it hadn't he'd be looking even worse.
He was certain he couldn't tell anyone about the specifics about the talk he had with Tony, but maybe just telling someone that something did happen would make him feel better.
"Yeah, I… I just ran into someone on my way to Recovery Girl." He answered, holding his knees a little less tightly to his chest.
"Someone you know?" She asked, sliding a bit closer to him, close enough that their legs were touching.
"I guess you could say that." Sighing, Peter looked down for a moment at the floor as he rubbed his tired eyes.
Nejire thought about something for a moment, staying silent before placing a comforting hand on his knee.
"Do you… wanna talk about it?"
He closed his eyes for a moment, ignoring the fact that he probably couldn't even tell someone anything that happened.
"… Not really? If that's okay."
She hummed, removing the hand on his knee as they sat in peaceful silence for a few moments.
"Wanna go to the smoothie machine Togata-Kun found? Maybe that could make you feel better."
Peter thought about it for a moment before looking at her, a smile that didn't reach his eyes on his face.
"Can I just stay here for a bit? Please? I'm just… I just need a minute." He asked her, the girl smiling comfortingly back at him and nodding.
Nejire hesitated for a moment, before gaining a small blush and resting her head on his shoulder, an action that made Peter feel a lot more at peace.
"Thanks for being here, Nejire," Peter muttered, Nejire only letting out a soft hum before they went back to sitting together in silence.
Just like that, a few of his worries began to slowly fade away.
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