January 18, 2022
Words: switch
Yesterday, the weight of my body sank into the mattress of the bed, sneers turning to my direction, and mocking laughs echoed throughout the environment. Today, the voluptuous curves seduced my spectators, immoral gazes peers into my soul, and breaths of perverts filled the air with unpleasant aroma as I walked past them. Such a tedious life.
I am a wandering soul. Waking up inside of different people and sleeping to repeat the cycle. It is a tiresome life. Always living the life of a person I do not know, even waking up without memories of the owners of the bodies I possess. I was forced to play detective just to gain knowledge, to use information in order to play the role of my owner.
I cannot freely control their lives. That would go against my philosophy: live the day of the person I possessed. I cannot feel emotion for myself, I will feel emotion based on the character I was playing, to follow a script and fulfill my role. That was how I lived till now. However, fatigue got the best of me.
There was no rest in between sleeping and waking up. There was no rest during the investigation. There was no rest while playing my role. My life was restless.
Tomorrow came. The room was dimly lit by the morning sun. Nothing can be seen in all four corners. No furniture, no electronics, no clothes, no bed nor blanket, no food. Nothing. It was but an empty white room with windows on three sides and a door on the one side. A tranquil yet lonely life of a mysterious individual.
Gently opening the door, the creaking sound vibrated through the air, I made my way downstairs. Stepping foot to the living room, many expressions of unfamiliar faces greeted me. There was a lady sitting on the coach weeping tears, and a man staring daggers into my gaze.
"Good morning," I said. It was the safest word to say at the moment. While I do not know what character I was playing, I tried to improvise by saying the safest words.
"Honey, are you---"
"Did I not tell you to avoid showing your filthy appearance while we were here!?" The man interrupted, screaming at the top of his lungs. A vein was popping on his temple and steam going out of his head. He was furious just by looking at me.
"I'm sorry," I said, making my way upstairs and locking myself inside my room.
I can't take this anymore. Living the life of other people everyday, and possibly forever, would become tiresome as time goes by. I need to find a way to stop this.
In the corner of my eye was a box cutter. Inspecting it, it had a sharp blade enough to cut flesh. A light bulb lit up, enlightening me of an idea. What if there was a chance of salvation by ending the life of this body. What If by breaking the cycle of awakening and slumber would I finally receive the rest I long for. The thought of experiencing rest filled me with dopamine.
And thus, with a deep slit to the wrist, darkness covered my vision. Finally I could rest after all the decades I wasted my time playing characters for the plays of other people.
But then a chime had awoken me from a fleeting rest.