My wife wasn't introduced to me by a matchmaker; I met her myself. Back in those days, in our rural area, love marriages were quite rare. Most marriages were arranged by matchmakers or parents.
When I first met her, I thought she was fairly pretty, had a good physique, and was quite robust. However, there was a fierceness in her demeanor.
I had been running a small business in Wuhu for a few years, and I missed the ideal age for finding a partner. By the time I was 26 or 27, many people in the countryside were already married. At that time, my family was going through financial difficulties, and she was six years younger than me. So, I didn't mind this particular shortcoming.
However, it took me several years of marriage to truly understand just how fierce she could be, and it wasn't ordinary fierceness; it was a terrifying kind of fierceness, coupled with extreme stubbornness and unreasonable behavior.
After we got married, we used to have frequent and intense arguments, and she was usually the one who initiated them. The main reasons behind our arguments were her overly picky and demanding nature, her dissatisfaction with many things, and financial issues.
I don't smoke, drink, or gamble, and I don't have any other major expenses. I primarily work hard, but my income is not high. Naturally, she was dissatisfied because women tend to be naturally inclined towards wealth.
For ordinary people without influential backgrounds, the path to prosperity is through business. Working as a laborer or doing odd jobs won't make you wealthy.
I explained these principles to her, but she strongly disliked them. She had a habit of holding onto money tightly once it was in her hands. Starting a business requires capital, so I didn't have a strong desire to go into business with her.
In the first few years of our marriage, I used to dig for eels every year, which required no initial investment – just a large shovel.
Looking back, those were the happiest times of my life. When I left home and went to the fields, I left behind my wife's constant nagging, complaints, and scolding. I felt remarkably content. Returning home in the evening, a vendor would come to buy the eels. I handed the money over to my wife, and that was the end of my involvement.
The next day, I would ask my wife for money to have lunch at a restaurant, then head out to dig for eels again.
Back then, a restaurant meal cost 5 yuan, but my wife often gave me only 4 yuan, which made me uncomfortable. Eventually, I started hiding my money.
What really upset me was one winter day when a few of us walked more than 10 miles. Suddenly, it began to rain heavily, and it just wouldn't stop. Helpless, we had to run back in the pouring rain. I got soaked, to the point that even my underwear was drenched. It was freezing, so we had to keep running to generate some heat. My legs even cramped up from running.
When I got home, I sat on the edge of the bed to change my clothes. Suddenly, my wife shouted, "What the hell, are you blind? You wet the bedsheets!"
I had just moved to sit on a stool when she yelled again, "The stool is dirty!"
I had no choice but to stand up while changing my clothes and asked, "What's gotten into you today? Did you eat gunpowder or something?"
"You [expletive], you didn't even catch a single eel!" She started scolding me incessantly.
In 1996, I applied for a pen patent, and in 1997, some companies in Hong Kong and Guangdong expressed interest in buying my patent. They said my patent needed evaluation, and once it was evaluated, they would purchase it. I spent several thousand yuan [which was several years' worth of our income] to get the patent evaluated. However, these companies disappeared without a trace, and I realized I had been scammed.
This scam was catastrophic for me. My wife scolded me countless times because of it and completely lost respect for me. She became extremely distrustful of me. From then on, no matter what investment I wanted to make or the business I wanted to start, she vehemently opposed it and imposed strict financial restrictions on me.
In recent years, I have been researching and promoting extraterrestrial Artificial Field Scanning technology and the Unified Field Theory. I frequently write articles and publish papers online, sharing my childhood encounters with extraterrestrial beings.
Some educated people and village officials in our area, when they see my wife, say,
"Your husband, Zhang Xiangqian, is remarkable. He has a big online following, and his papers have been published in the United States. We heard that people from Beijing have come to visit him."
Whenever my wife hears such comments, she has a habit of publicly scolding me to save face, promptly adding, "My husband, Aqian, got cheated out of thousands of yuan doing that thing."
My father-in-law often tells me, "Aqian, you need to have a trade. Just digging for eels won't get you anywhere. You're covered in mud all the time, and people look down on you."
In 1999, I borrowed 3,500 yuan from my mother-in-law and opened an electric welding repair shop in Sanhe Town with my older brother. I had never done welding before, but my brother knew how. His previous business had just failed, and he had no money to invest, so all the money came from me. I didn't dare ask my wife for money.
Initially, my wife neither opposed nor supported the welding shop. My sister-in-law was a real troublemaker, constantly pressuring my brother to leave. Her reasoning was simple: she wanted to see me fail, to see how someone who had never done welding before would manage to run an electric welding repair shop.
Eventually, my wife joined in the arguments. The quarrels escalated, and my brother was so stressed that he began coughing up blood. Seeing him spitting fresh blood on the ground, I had no choice but to let him leave.
I worked alone, welding at night repeatedly. I endured several bouts of severe eye strain and, over time, mastered the art of welding.
After my brother left, there were very few customers at the electric welding repair shop, and tax collectors and fee collectors would often come knocking. Amid my wife's relentless opposition and quarrels, the repair shop was eventually closed.
I remember one winter day when she hid the key to my repair shop. I searched everywhere for it, like a desperate scavenger hunt, until I finally found it. Otherwise, I might have had to spend a night outside in the cold repair shop.
I brought all the equipment from the repair shop back home and started digging for eels again. However, after that incident, I was determined to reopen the repair shop because I strongly felt that life was tough and I needed a stable source of income.
I rented a piece of land at the village entrance and started planning for the repair shop. At first, my wife neither supported nor opposed the idea. All the money I earned from digging eels went to her, but she never shared a cent.
I dug eels for a while, bought bricks, dug more eels, and bought roof tiles, so my rural electric welding repair shop was about to be established.
To raise the shop's floor level, we had to fill it with soil since the ground was too low. I hired a tractor driver who asked me,
"Why don't you call your wife to help you dig the soil? It'll be quicker."
In my mind, I thought my wife was tough, so I didn't dare ask her. However, I felt it wasn't right to speak ill of her in front of others, so I said, "She's busy with something else."
As I was talking, my wife suddenly appeared in front of me, hands on her hips, questioning why I wanted to fill the soil. "Why are you filling soil? Are you trying to bury yourself?"
We only completed half of the soil filling, and then it was stopped due to my wife's threats. This left severe consequences, and whenever it rained heavily, the repair shop floor would be flooded.
The repair shop operated for some time and received praise from many villagers. It began to make money due to the low costs in the countryside. However, my wife intensified her arguments.
Sometimes I wondered why she continued to argue and oppose the repair shop when it was making money.
I welded a large iron gate for the shop, and at night, if my wife's nagging got to me, I would go to the repair shop, find a wooden board, and sleep there without taking off my clothes.
One night, after being verbally abused by my wife for over an hour without any reason, I remained silent. She showed no sign of stopping, so I quietly made my way to the electric welding repair shop, which was about a mile away from home.
Unfortunately, that night, there were too many mosquitoes. I wished for a small store where I could buy some mosquito repellent.
The idea of opening a small store resurfaced in my mind. However, fearing my wife's opposition, I often imagined the scene where the first batch of store goods arrived home, and my wife would hysterically throw everything out. So, I hesitated for a long time.
During the next year's Spring Festival, on the eighth day of the first lunar month, many guests, most of whom were from my wife's side of the family, came to our house. I felt it was an opportunity and hurried to Sanhe Town to distribute some small goods, totaling 40 yuan, mainly children's snacks. When my wife saw that I had actually delivered goods for a store, she planned to open one. Although it was unexpected, she didn't argue, possibly to save face in front of her family.
Previously, when I mentioned wanting to open a store, my wife had glared at me and said, "Dare you!"
My wife gave some snacks to the children from her family during the Spring Festival, and everyone was happy. Since it was the lunar new year, the children had received red envelopes with money, and the 40 yuan worth of snacks quickly sold out. My wife urged me to distribute more goods in the streets.
I carefully chose the right time, and the small store initially received her support. The beginning went smoothly, and considering how tumultuous it was when I first opened the repair shop, I couldn't believe how smoothly the small store was progressing.
However, I didn't anticipate that this small store would lift us out of poverty, become our main source of income, and also the source of our intense arguments.
After operating the small store for a while, its income far surpassed that of the repair shop. I decided to go big and expand. The land for my electric welding repair shop was rented for 100 yuan per year, which, while not much, was still an expense. If I wanted to expand, I had to buy it.
To smoothly purchase the land, I brainstormed a plan. I first closed both the repair shop and the small store, moved to the nearby town of Tongda, and rented a house to operate for a while. Then, I asked my father-in-law to convince the landlord to sell me the land.
The landlord thought that with the 100 yuan annual rent for the land gone, the land was just lying there with no purpose. So, they agreed to sell it to me for 1,250 yuan.
Once I acquired the land, my father-in-law and I discussed building a house and expanding the small store. However, my wife overheard our conversation and barged in, demanding loudly, "This land belongs to someone else! Why do you want to build on it? Are you out of your mind?"
"I've already purchased the land," I calmly replied, anticipating her anger.
"Bought it? Why didn't you let me know, huh?" My wife was visibly upset.
"I couldn't let you know about these things," my father-in-law said.
"Last year, the scrapyard owner had a cutting machine for 300 yuan. He thought Aqian was an honest guy, so he left it for him. A new one costs 700 yuan, and Aqian didn't dare to ask you for money. He borrowed from me. When you asked me why Aqian borrowed money, I told you the truth. And you kept following Aqian, saying, "Why did you buy a cutting machine? Are you going to cut your head off? Look at you, what kind of things you say."
The next day, my wife asked me how much I had spent on buying the land. "1,250 yuan," I replied.
My wife immediately got angry. "They practically gave this place away for free, and nobody wanted it. 1,250 yuan? Hmph! I'm going to demand it back and make things clear with them." She turned and went to the landlord's house.
I had learned through experience that running a small store in the countryside could be quite profitable. After half a year of planning, I was on the verge of achieving my goal. Seeing my wife's angry stride, I realized that she might ruin my plans. Fortunately, the landlord wasn't home that day, and my first step toward expanding the store was successful.
While building the house, the tile workers were from my wife's hometown, and she made a big scene in front of her family.
Why did she oppose the expansion of the small store? I gradually understood that it was essentially her mindset of holding onto money once it was in hand.
She couldn't distinguish between spending and investing. She was always frugal and unhappy whenever money was spent, leading to arguments and fights.
Additionally, she liked to take charge of everything, even when she had no understanding or capability in certain matters. She would often give arbitrary and reckless instructions. There was no planning, everything was done on a whim, and she was extremely selfish, irresponsible, and disrespectful of others' opinions. Her explosive temper was the result of all these characteristics, and that's why she loved to argue.
Under her strong interference, the small store's building suffered severe consequences and had to be rebuilt. This cycle of building and demolishing happened multiple times, wasting a lot of money. Each time, the construction process started and ended amidst my wife's intense arguments.
One time, she was particularly harsh with her insults, going on and on. A tile worker from her hometown couldn't take it anymore and ran back home. My wife explained that she was scolding me, not him.
The tile worker said, "Why are you scolding Afan? What's your purpose? If you didn't want him to rebuild the house, you should have stopped him from tearing it down. Now that the house is gone, why are you still scolding him? Is it all over now, or are you going to stop it? I really don't understand how your mind works."
The house was completed, and its area expanded several times. I also built another house specifically for an electric welding and bicycle repair shop.
I changed the small store sign to "supermarket," and the business started booming. However, my wife remained vehemently opposed and adopted an uncooperative attitude.
By this time, hardly anyone supported her. Every New Year, she would create a massive commotion, breaking things and turning the house into a mess.
Sometimes, when I had dirty hands from repairing things and a customer came to buy something, my wife would stand by and refuse to help as if she had nothing to do with it, which was particularly infuriating.
One time, it was probably one of the most regrettable incidents. It happened one evening when someone on QQ asked me about my annual income. He claimed to be a big boss and offered to give me a large sum of money, with the annual interest alone exceeding our total annual income. He advised me not to do anything else and to focus on my research in Unified Field Theory. Finally, he asked me to open a video call to show him my face and requested my bank account details.
Just at that moment, someone came to buy cigarettes at our door. "Afqian, go online later and bring me the cigarettes," he said loudly.
I signaled to my wife to get the cigarettes, but she turned her face away and ignored me. The customer raised his voice, saying, "Hurry up! What's going on?"
I signaled to my daughter to get the cigarettes, but she completely ignored the request.
The customer's voice had a certain kind of power, and it frightened me. I had no choice but to get the cigarettes for him.
At that moment, my daughter sat at the computer desk and told the big boss, "My dad is a liar. He failed in real life and came online to seek attention."
I rushed over and questioned my daughter, "Why did you say your dad is a liar? Do you know about my encounters with extraterrestrials when I was a child? Do you know the importance of Unified Field Theory that I brought?..."
My daughter remained silent, with no signs of remorse on her face, just a nonchalant and disdainful attitude.
When I looked back at the computer, the big boss had already blocked me on QQ.
The next day, another netizen on QQ asked me,
"What happened? Yesterday, that big boss was my good friend. He was ready to give you money, support your research in Unified Field Theory, and help you break free from your financial struggles. It was me who convinced him to assist you. How could your daughter call you a liar? What did you do? How can you focus on research when life is difficult? He was planning to give you a seven-figure sum, and you'll see how poverty can affect your research."
After that incident, we often argued because of money.