Author Note: Still recovering from the terminal illness(worldbuilder disease) and so took time to publish. Anyway, I only sprinkled some medical knowledge to compensate for lack of medical scenes, so hope it's good enough.
And oh, since 2 out of 3 people choose option 3.(Keep Boruto add-on in the story but so short it won't be overly focused were it just be extension of existing Naruto mechanic and lore.), I will honour it.
Warning: The chapter contains unsettling elements.
Tsunade (POV)
—--------------
"Why can't I live longer, Tsunade-sama?! If I die, who will take care of my daughter?! Who's going to guide her, protect her, make sure she knows she's loved? She's just a child, Tsunade-sama, she needs her mother!"
"Why can't you save him, Tsunade-sama?! You're the greatest medical-nin in the world, aren't you? You've saved so many others, why can't you save him? You're supposed to be the best, why isn't it enough this time?"
"Why is life so harsh on the less fortunate, Tsunade-sama? No matter how hard we fight, no matter how much we struggle, are we always going to be the ones who suffer? While others live in peace and comfort, untouched by the pain we feel?"
"Why can't you end my suffering, Tsunade-sama? Please... I've lost everything—my strength, my pride. There's nothing left but this broken body, this shame. Do I have to return home like this, a failure in every sense?"
"Why didn't the Shodai Hokage conquer the world, Tsunade-sama? If he had, maybe things would be different. Maybe then my friend wouldn't have died... Maybe this war, this pain…..would just be a nightmare I am relieved that it wasn't real.. …"
"Why, Tsunade-sama?
Why?
Why?
Why?
Why?
Why?"
"Do you want to know why war happens, Tsunade? It's not because of ideals or righteousness. It's driven by human need—greed, hunger for power, and fear. Love, communication, understanding—none of that stops it. Only absolute strength and the fear it brings can keep the peace."
"Tsunadeee!"
With a sharp gasp, I jolted awake, pulling myself free from the suffocating grip of those haunting voices.
"Whoa, whoa, are you okay? You don't look so good... maybe—"
"Never mind, Jiraiya," I cut him off, quickly shifting the focus. "Just tell me why you're here." I wasn't about to give this prev any more reason to gloat—though deep down, I couldn't deny a small part of me was thankful he'd broken the nightmare's hold. Not that I'd ever admit it. He'd never let me live it down.
The nightmares have been relentless lately. Every time I close my eyes, they're waiting for me. I wake up and they linger, as vivid as if I'd lived through them just moments ago.
I wish I could brush them off, pretend they're just dreams, but they're so clear, so detailed, as if they're pulling me back into the past, forcing me to relive every moment.
I see the splinters of bone, sharp and unforgiving, driven deep into the mangled flesh.
I see the faces of the dead, their features so twisted and torn they're barely recognizable as human anymore.
I see comrades, warriors who fought beside me, now reduced to tears, their bodies shattered, unable to even stand.
I smell the sickening odor of burnt flesh, charred black by fire jutsu, lingering in the air long after the battle has ended.
I smell the acrid fumes of the Iwa shinobi's lava-release jutsu, the molten rock melting away what remained of a man's head.
I smell the metallic stench of blood, thick in the air, as patients cough it up from the puncture wounds left by seemingly harmless fragments of stone.
I hear the wails of villagers as they clutch the lifeless bodies of their loved ones, the light gone from their eyes, their souls lost.
I hear the desperate cries of my own men, overcome by grief, falling to their knees before me, begging me—begging me to bring their loved ones back from the dead, as if I had the power of the gods.
I hear the tortured voices of my patients, pleading with me to end their pain, their bodies too broken to recover, too shattered to go on.
How could I not care? How could I turn away when all of this happens right in front of me?"
....
Snapping out of my thoughts, I refocused on Jiraiya.
"...and so the hot ch- *ahem* doctors were making their rounds, checking in on patients and found an anomaly they couldn't understand, but they couldn't enter your room becau-"
"As they didn't want to disturb my precious sleep…" I sighed, rubbing my forehead with a touch of frustration.
The whole system of social hierarchy was still a thorn in my side. Even after stepping down from my position as the Senju heir and outright disowning my family name to avoid any political ties, it felt like nothing had really changed between me and the public.
"People are still reluctant to come to me with their problems, even though I've fucking told them a thousand damn times that I'm happy to help."
"It's not like I send someone to the h—"
Cough! Cough!
...
Staring at Jiraiya for a moment, an awkward silence hung in the air, before I stood up and walked out of the tent to meet whoever was waiting for me.
"Tsunade-sama, w-we—"
"Just show me the way," I said, cutting her off. There was no need for her to apologize for stupid courtesy that is less important than someone's life.
***
As I entered the medical tent, my eyes scanned the rows of wounded patients, withholding the nausea I had as the scent of blood is prominent here.
"Why Tsunade-sama?"
'Why is this still on my head?' I groaned internally, feeling a wave of dizziness hit me. I forced it aside, shaking it off before anyone noticed.
"Where's the patient you were talking about?"
She pointed to a bed, and my eyes fell on a man in a condition that was beyond unsettling.
'Don't tell me he tried to…' I thought grimly, taking in the sight of him. He was tied to the bed, with cloth stuffed into his mouth, thrashing around as if his life depended on it.
His eyes were bloodshot, almost wild, like he was possessed by an evil spirit my grandma used to warn me about.
"What happened to him?" I asked.
"I'm not sure, Tsunade-sama. He was fine when we checked his injuries earlier, but as soon as someone used Earth Jutsu nearby, who was showcasing in front of their friends, he just… snapped. He began to attack patients nearby, so the guards who heard the commotion saved the patients on time and had to restrain him."
This….didn't make sense.
Why would Earth Jutsu set him off
It's not lik-
"Usually, when I'm dealing with prisoners who've gone through trauma, sometimes they have a special condition called PTSD. It's like a switch gets flipped in their mind, and they're thrown right back into the worst moments of their life. They might become hyperactive, breathing rapidly, or start attacking anyone around them, hallucinating that they're fighting the person who caused their trauma. For example, I had a prisoner once who lost control when I used my shadow to restrain him. Turned out, it reminded him of the night when he saw his parents slaughtered by a faceless figure who resembles a shadowy image."
'Never thought the jerk's ramblings would come in handy, but here we are...' I sighed and gestured for an Uchiha nearby to come over.
"What can I do for you, Tsunade-sama?" he asked, standing at attention.
"I need you to cast a Genjutsu. Make him believe he's fighting Iwa shinobi and that he's slaughtering them." I whispered the request into his ear, and he gave me a quiet nod of understanding.
This was one way to relieve him without causing further damage to his psyche.
His Sharingan spun to life, the three tomoe swirling and glowing as he focused on the patient. The man's wild, murderous eyes slowly started to calm, his eyelids growing heavy until they closed completely, leaving him limp and still.
Seeing that the Genjutsu had worked, I felt relieved and ordered the ropes and the gag to be removed.
"Thank you for the help," I said, knowing there was probably no one better suited to this task than an Uchiha.
"It's an honor to assist, Tsunade-sama," he replied with a smile before taking his leave.
'Definitely from the dove faction,' I mused, before turning my full attention back to the patient.
"What's his condition, Miss Eiko?"
"Fortunately, his heart rate is stable, and he's fallen asleep, but… his arm's condition has worsened," she said, her Byakugan activated, looking slightly pale as she stared at his injured arm.
"He fell into a trap set by Iwa shinobi and barely survived the impact because his right arm took most of the damage. As a result, his arm is fractured.
But when he forced his injured arm to attack, it made things far worse. The damage is severe. I can see the bone—it's split… into several pieces."
"...How m—?"
"There are as many pieces as in a jigsaw puzzle that became popular a few months ago for children around the age five."
…So that means the bone is broken into 12 to 24 fragments.
With a heavy sigh, I instructed the nurse to bring a clean white cloth and carefully wrap it around his arm. I then told Miss Eiko to file the paperwork declaring him unfit for duty as a shinobi.
There's no hope of fixing his arm. Even if we tried to use Mystical Palm Technique on the exposed fractured bone after cutting into the anterior and accelerating its cell division process without speeding up the surrounding cell replacement —while preventing growth of bacteria or viruses on the flesh from the exposed air—it would be pointless.
His arm would either age beyond use or, we'd be forced to amputate it to stop the harmful growth of bacteria or viruses that came from exposed air that would spread around his and threaten his life if we didn't remove the arm in time.
…
"I'm sorry, Tsunade-sama. I should've handled this better…"
"Why Tsunade-sama?"
.....
Sigh
"Just don't let it get to you. We're not gods. We do what we can, but you can't push yourself too hard," l said, trying to comfort her, though I felt hypocritical, as I doubted I wouldn't relive this in my nightmares the next day.
But regardless, this is the life I chose, so I have to live with it.
This is the price I paid for being a medical-nin.
Failure of saving them...is the outcome I have to accept.
…
With another sigh, I instructed her to continue her work—there were still so many others who needed help.
And speaking of which, it seems like my own workload is piling up, as multiple staff members hurried toward me from different directions.
'It's going to be a long day…'
***
'I think I should go to sleep...'
It was becoming increasingly difficult to focus on the letter I was writing to Sensei. Every time I tried to add more, the brush slipped, and I kept smudging the ink across the paper, leaving messy streaks all over. My hand felt heavy, and my eyes burned from exhaustion.
Yawning, I decided to call it a night. Before heading to bed, I made my way to Nawaki's tent, wanting to say goodnight to him first.
The air outside was thick with an unsettling stillness. It wasn't just dark, where the moon went to sleep early, it had the kind of gloom that wrapped itself around you. Crickets chirped incessantly, their noise somehow amplifying the eerie quiet of the night.
As I walked, something strange caught my eye. A murder of crows was flying low in the direction of the southwest.
For a moment, I stopped, confused, watching them fade into the distance.
'I guess they're heading to feast on the corpses of my fallen men...'
The thought was bitter, but I shrugged it off, knowing that guards were stationed near the bodies to prepare them for transport back to Konoha, where they would be laid to rest in the cemetery.
"Nawaki, are you awake?" I whispered as I reached his tent, keeping my voice low in case he'd already drifted off to sleep.
"No, Big Si—" he started, then paused, realizing he'd given himself away.
"Lie better next time, Nawaki," I smirked, pulling the flap of his tent aside to step inside.
"So, how's the training going?"
"Umm... it's going fine," he mumbled, trying to sound convincing.
"And?"
A pause stretched out between us before he finally sighed, his shoulders slumping slightly. "It's... taking longer than I thought. Mastering lightning chakra to numb my senses enough to use the Gate of Life properly isn't as easy as I thought."
I could hear the frustration in his voice, see the disappointment etched on his face. I understood. I couldn't blame him for feeling this way at all.
His primary chakra affinity wasn't lightning after all, and trying to learn jutsu outside one's affinity is very slow and feels unrewarding.
Most shinobi don't even bother learning beyond their natural affinity. (except for maybe Earth Release: Mud Wall due to its lost chakra consumption and defensive properties.) They'd rather focus on what they're already good at.
"Yeah, it's tough," I said, my voice softening.
"But hey, don't stress about it too much. Take your time. You don't have to worry about a thing as long as I'm here." I assured him and ruffled his hair, trying to offer some comfort
He huffed, clearly embarrassed. "Hey, I'm not a kid!" He tried to move his head out of reach, but I only laughed.
"You are to me," I teased, messing up his hair even more until it stuck out in all directions.
Satisfied with the chaos I'd created, I finally let him go, chuckling at the sight of his hair—a total mess, like the circus I used to watch with A—actually, never mind. No need to think about that jerk right now.
"Anyway, Nawaki, I'm heading to bed. Don't hesitate to come to me or Orochimaru if you need anything, okay?"
"Yes, Big Sister," he replied, his voice softening as he pulled the blanket over his head, retreating into its warmth.
With a smile, I waved my hand at him and turned to leave the tent. My mind wandered as I walked, thoughts drifting to the letter I still had to finish writing to Sensei, thinking of what else I needed to inform before—
*Puff.*
I froze mid-step.
Turning back, I saw a cloud of white smoke where Nawaki had been. His blanket lay empty, and the realization hit me instantly.
'Shadow Clone Jutsu…'
That little brat! Tightening my fists, I felt frustration bubble up inside me.
Where the hell did he run off to? I stormed out of the tent, determined to find him in the encampment and drag him back here before giving him a proper scolding.
But just as I was about to shout his name, my heart skipped a beat when I heard a distant, urgent voice.
"We need to go quick—Nawaki's been ambushed!" Jiraiya's voice cut through the night like a knife.
***
....
Why?
….
"You are a selfish woman, unwilling to bear the responsibility of your predecessor. Instead, you push it onto a child who lacks the qualifications to handle it, driving him to his grave while pretending to be his sweet elder sister."