Chereads / Minami no hanashi : Yume / Chapter 43 - The Desire to Give Up

Chapter 43 - The Desire to Give Up

Minami no Hanashi : Yume - AdagioMinami was being cheered on by everyone, her face lit up with genuine joy and festive energy.

Every competition has its lucky winner and its unfortunate loser. Asayoshi, bent over, hands on his knees, was gasping for air after this battle, which ironically wasn't much of one given the performance gap between the two runners.

His passion and enthusiasm had vanished, leaving only one thing: exhaustion. It was obvious—Asayoshi had given it his all. His usual playful and competitive demeanor was gone. The difference in their abilities had been laid bare during the race. The unfortunate loser now stood apart from the lively, boisterous crowd of Class 2-2, which was full of energy and excitement.Asayoshi was catching his breath in the corner, his expression one of lucidity, as though reality had finally caught up with him.Hiroto Tanaka suddenly appeared, walking over to join his junior. He could perfectly understand the state Asayoshi was in. As an athlete himself, he was undoubtedly one of the few who truly knew this feeling.He placed a hand on Asayoshi's shoulder."What do you want me to say to you?"Asayoshi straightened up, having caught his breath. He looked at the sky and replied, "I don't know... maybe something like, 'You'll do better next time.'""You'll do better next time, Asayoshi!" Tanaka said with a smile.Although it was Asayoshi who had chosen those words, he replied in a defeated tone, "Well, I'm not so sure about that anymore..."Tanaka understood him better than anyone. "We try so hard to impress others that we forget the one we surprise the most is ourselves. Don't give up so easily.""'Easily?' I've lost, what, dozens of times already?""The greatest are those who never gave up."Asayoshi chuckled softly, looking resolved. "I'm sure you think the same as me. There's no way I can beat her when she's at her best."A heavy, revealing silence hung in the air. Tanaka didn't seem to deny his junior's statement. Instead, he smiled and replied with a playful tone, "Haha! What arrogance! You think you have the luxury to focus on Minami and then give up, assuming you'll just end up right behind her, don't you?"Asayoshi stayed silent, waiting for his senior to continue. Tanaka suddenly adopted a serious expression, locked eyes with Asayoshi, and said, "Yes. Maybe you'll never beat her. But keep fighting. Keep training. 'You'll do better next time.' Having someone more talented than you to chase is a good thing—it pushes you to surpass yourself and give your best. But if it starts having the opposite effect, then focus on yourself because, truthfully, you haven't even fought yet."Asayoshi furrowed his brows and responded irritably, "What do you mean by that? You're telling me to keep fighting and then saying I haven't even started fighting yet?"Tanaka grabbed him by the hair and gave him a devilish grin. "Hey, what's with the tone? You think we're equals now, huh?"Asayoshi, now more relaxed, let out small cries of pain. "Ow! Ow! Stop! Okay, okay, I'm sorry!"Tanaka burst into laughter before continuing, "No, sorry, I misspoke. You need to win against yourself first before even thinking about beating an athlete like Minami.""How am I supposed to know when I've won against myself?""When the desire to give up has completely left your being."A moment of silence revealed Asayoshi's contemplation of those words. He sighed and said, "I thought I had already passed that stage. I was sure that desire to give up was completely gone, and yet now..."Tanaka took a moment to think and then replied, "How do I explain this? I don't know if it's the same for everyone, but as you progress, your old self—the one marked by that desire to give up—doesn't stay still. It keeps moving forward too. In the end, ironically, it's that old self, burdened by the urge to quit, that never stops advancing and threatens to catch up with you."The track team captain paused for a moment and then turned his gaze to the track. "And sometimes, it does catch up.""You told me to focus on beating Minami only after I've fought myself and my desire to give up. You talked about it like it's something you do just once, but now you're suggesting it's something I'll have to do over and over again."Tanaka smiled and replied, "Exactly. Unfortunately, all athletes face this boomerang effect. We're all in the same boat. The strongest are the ones who manage to throw the boomerang so far that they have enough time to turn around and run as fast as they can before it comes back. The goal is to widen the gap between yourself and your old self before it catches up again. That's the real fight.""And you? Where's your boomerang?" Asayoshi asked.His senior smiled as he replied, "Me? I managed to throw it really far! It's not catching up to me anytime soon, but I absolutely can't stop running, haha!"Asayoshi smiled too and said with a defeated air, "I don't know if it's the fatigue or your nonsense making me hallucinate, but..." He looked at his hands and continued, "I can see it. It's right here in my hands."Tanaka suddenly brightened up and exclaimed, "Well, that's perfect!""Huh?"The unfortunate loser didn't understand his senior's attitude. Tanaka continued speaking with a tone full of warmth: "But you know what? Don't be too hard on it.""On Minami? No way. I have my pride as an athlete. She's just better, that's all.""Yes, I know that. I was talking about your boomerang."Asayoshi gave him a blank look. "Okay, I admit the metaphor is nice, but don't you think you're getting a little carried away?"Tanaka replied with a sincere seriousness, "I'm completely serious. In the end, it's ironically that damn boomerang that pushes us to surpass ourselves. The secret is to accept it, embrace it, and celebrate its presence."Tanaka's words resonated deeply in Asayoshi's heart. His eyes widened as if he'd just been touched by divine grace.He let out a few quiet words, lowering his gaze. "I see. Thank you. You really are the perfect person to lead the club.""Haha! So you're finally talking to me with some respect, huh?" Tanaka said, laughing.Asayoshi, who had been completely crushed just minutes ago, seemed to have regained a glimmer of his usual spark. But not everything was resolved—the boomerang was still there."Now, throw your boomerang," Tanaka said."Huh?""That's how I managed to throw mine so far. I imagined it firmly in my hands, then threw it with all my strength. After that, I ran as fast as I could in the opposite direction, haha!""Seriously?"Tanaka provoked him with a grin. "Do you want to die holding your boomerang?"Asayoshi's confident, usual smile reappeared. Stretching his shoulders and taking a stance, he looked at the sky, clenched his right fist tightly, and seemed to calculate the perfect angle, the best trajectory to throw his boomerang.He looked like he'd made up his mind. Taking a deep breath, he began to run, shouting at the top of his lungs. All of Class 2-2 turned to watch this spectacle with curiosity.Asayoshi kept his fist clenched behind him. The boomerang was really there—he could feel it. After running about a hundred meters, he let out one last yell and hurled the boomerang. He kept shouting as it flew toward the horizon. His powerful cry seemed to come from the depths of his soul.Tanaka called out from afar, "Asayoshi!!!"He turned around in surprise. "YES?!""NOW RUN!!!"Asayoshi jumped in shock. "OH, RIGHT!!"Without wasting a second, he sprinted in the opposite direction with all his might. As he passed Tanaka, the two athletes high-fived each other with a smile, and Asayoshi had fulfilled his mission. He ran past his classmates, shouting as he headed toward the locker rooms.Minami watched the scene in stunned silence, unsure of what to make of it. The rest of the class was abuzz, intrigued by his behavior.Nao boasted loudly: "Don't overthink it! You know him, he's a sports freak. He just doesn't want to suffer the humiliation of a lifetime, haha!"Minami, her gaze sharp and perceptive, responded, "I'm not so sure... He seemed... different.""Oh, come on~ you're blowing this way out of proportion. He just doesn't want to face the people who bet on his victory!" Nao replied dismissively.Tsuka interjected sharply: "Stop spouting nonsense. If Minami says it, it must be true. She knows him better than anyone."Caught off guard by Tsuka's remark, Nao stammered awkwardly, "Huh? Uh... Y-yeah, maybe..."Minami, determined to find answers, decided to speak with Tanaka.Outside the lockers, a little laterAsayoshi walked out of the locker room, yawning. Minami, waiting by the side, called out to him: "Hey!"Startled, he jumped. "Aargh! What are you doing here?! Oh no, I hope Tanaka didn't tell her everything! This is so embarrassing!!""The captain didn't tell me everything—""Oh, yes!" thought Asayoshi, relieved."—but he did mention that you thought about giving up—""Oh, no! He could've talked about the boomerang instead, and I'd have been fine with it. But no, he had to tell her that, of all people!" Asayoshi thought, mortified.Expecting the worst, Asayoshi noticed something different about Minami. She seemed more composed, almost as if she'd matured in the meantime. Yet, she appeared to struggle to get her words out, as though her vocal cords were tangled.Minami thought to herself: Ugh, I didn't think this would be so hard with someone else! I managed fine with Narumi, so that means I can do it!"Look, I know I've told you to give up more than once, but honestly... I don't want you to quit," she admitted.Minami's gaze softened, full of kindness. Asayoshi couldn't help but blush and thought: Huh? What's with that look? This must be a trap! She's trying to hypnotize me—I can't fall for it!Perplexed by his delayed response, Minami shifted back to her usual deadpan expression.Finally recognizing her typical demeanor, Asayoshi exclaimed, "Ah, there you are! That's more like it!""Anyway, did you hear what I said?" Minami pressed.Snapping back to reality, he flashed his trademark smile. "Oh! Yeah, don't worry! You're not getting rid of me that easily!"Satisfied with his response, Minami gave him the same warm smile as before.Asayoshi thought: Why is she smiling at me like that?!She then extended her fist toward him, mimicking the gesture he had made in the classroom earlier. Surprised but pleased, Asayoshi realized that someone he considered his rival also acknowledged him. He grinned and bumped his fist against hers, then took off running, shouting: "Just you wait! I'll beat you someday! Don't slack off!""Yeah, yeah, keep dreaming!" Minami laughed in response.Sanae was using the locker room showers while Minami waited outside for them to head home together. All the other students had already left. After about twenty minutes, Sanae finally emerged."You really took your time!" Minami said, crossing her arms."Sorry! But why are you even waiting for me?"Minami seemed puzzled, as if the answer were obvious. "Uh, we're walking home together, aren't we?"Sanae smacked her forehead, as if remembering something important. "Oh, right! I totally forgot to tell you—I'm so sorry! I have to head to the cooking club!""What?! Oh, well, go ahead then!"Sanae nodded and hurried back toward the school. Minami watched her run off. Just as she was about to turn away, Sanae stopped and shouted from afar, "Hey! Wanna come to the club?"Minami looked at her with a smile but turned her back, pretending she hadn't heard.Deep in thought, Minami suddenly felt something hit her backpack. She turned to see Nao, the delinquent, grinning at her. "Hey! Come over here!"Her face showed hesitation. Was it really a good idea to follow a delinquent? And after school hours, no less? Recalling the recent victory, she reasoned that maybe they weren't so bad after all. She decided to approach cautiously.Nao, the most cheerful of the troublemakers, beamed at her. "Wanna join us? We're spending the money we won on bets with the boss!"Caught off guard, Minami had no idea how to respond. Instead, she asked, "What are you even doing here? Aren't you going home?""The boss is in that shop right over there. He sent me to grab something, and I bumped into you! So, come on!"Before Minami could make a decision, Nao took it upon himself to assume she'd follow. He started walking off, leaving her no choice but to go along. "I'll just return his headband and leave," she muttered to herself.Minami stepped into the store, following Nao, and was struck by the transformation. Behind its ordinary exterior lay what seemed to be a den for delinquents.Shelves were lined with cards, dice, and other gambling paraphernalia. Tables were scattered throughout the room—some occupied by men playing games, others empty and waiting for new challengers. A faint haze of smoke hung in the air, likely from cigarettes or less legal substances.The sound of laughter and shuffling cards filled the space, accompanied by a dim, flickering neon light that gave the place an eerie, hypnotic ambiance.Minami felt both thrilled and uneasy, as if she had stumbled into one of the forbidden places she read about in her books.As she followed Nao deeper into the shop, she wondered what other secrets this mysterious place held.Finally, they arrived at a door leading to the boss. But as the smoke thickened, Minami began to cough violently. At that exact moment, Nao flung the door open and shouted: "Surprise, boss! Look who I brought!"Kurou, seated calmly at a desk with a pen in hand, immediately glared at Nao upon seeing Minami. His expression turned into a scowl. "You've got to be kidding me," he growled."I-I thought you'd be happy! It's thanks to her that we—"Kurou silenced him with a wave of his hand, turning his attention to Minami. "Why did you follow him?""Good question," she thought to herself. "I... I don't know? He invited me nicely, and when I saw the shop, I didn't think it'd be like this.""You're so naïve, bunny." Kurou stood and walked toward her. "Do you always follow strangers like that?"Feeling uneasy outside the familiar confines of school, Minami instinctively stepped back. "No, but... You're not exactly strangers. We're in the same class."She hurriedly pulled the headband from her bag and handed it to him.Kurou took the headband, glanced at it, then placed it back on her head. "If you're that naïve, I wouldn't bet on you lasting long."Unlike their encounter at school, Minami tried not to draw too much attention to herself. Surrounded by shady and potentially hostile people, she decided it was best to stay quiet. Just as she was about to speak and make an excuse to leave, Kurou put away his things and grabbed his jacket."We're leaving," he said simply, heading for the door and pulling the headband off Minami's head as he passed.Outside, Nao eagerly asked, "Where to this time?""We're picking up the other two at the hideout. I can't have fun without them. They're part of the Chika-Bankaa; they're our brothers," Kurou replied.While he spoke, Minami tried to slip away unnoticed. But Kurou called out to her: "Don't let me catch you here again, bunny. We had our laughs, but that stays at school. Got it?""Yes." Minami walked away as if nothing had happened.On the way homeMinami was moved upon hearing that the great and persistent Asayoshi had considered quitting after losing to her. As a fierce competitor, she enjoyed crushing her opponents, but she thought: Okay, I'm super satisfied. I need to tell Narumi about this. But I don't want to put people off this sport. Besides, he's a good teammate. It'd be a shame.Recently struck by newfound empathy, she was no longer as indifferent to those around her, beyond her close family.Minami started jogging, eager to share her story with her sister.Later, at the Katayama householdNarumi hadn't come home from school yet, leaving her impatient sister sprawled out on the couch. Her mother noticed and pointed it out with a smile: "She finishes at 6:30.""6:30?! Do middle schoolers finish that late these days?!""I guess so," her mother replied, amused.Minami began to grow restless: "But how is that even possible? I've never finished that late since the start of the term!"Azumi's smile hadn't changed, yet the energy she exuded felt distinctly different. Minami noticed this and began avoiding her gaze."Maybe it wouldn't be the case if you took the track club seriously...""Oops."The young athlete hesitated before replying: "I-I do take it seriously! It's just that there's no point—I'm too strong—No! I've changed! That's not the right mentality. I shouldn't go to the club just to crush my opponents! We're a team above all else!"Azumi watched her daughter wrestle with her inner thoughts. Minami noticed this and nervously declared with a forced smile: "No, uh, it wasn't useful before! Not anymore! Wait, no! It's always been useful, I was just too immature! That's it."Minami looked at her mother with apprehension, hoping her justification would be accepted. Her mother's silence was so loud it was enough to convey her opinion. Minami went upstairs to her room.While Azumi seemed immersed in her book, she glanced up and noticed it was time for Narumi to arrive. She stood up and opened the front door just as Narumi entered."H-How did you do that, Mom?" Narumi asked, both impressed and a little frightened."Minami seems to be waiting for you in her room. You should go see her," she said, stepping aside to let her in.Hearing this, Narumi's pupils seemed to dilate. Smiling from ear to ear, she rushed up to her sister's room.Narumi abruptly opened the door and shouted, "It's me!"She stopped for a moment but saw no one in the room."Mom said she was waiting for me here... If Mom says so, it must be true..." she thought as she walked in.Minami, hiding behind the door, suddenly leapt at her from behind, yelling, "NARUMI! YOU'RE FINALLY HERE!"Narumi froze suddenly, trembling. Minami, expecting screams, was intrigued by her sister's reaction. The younger girl turned to her, visibly upset, her eyes shining with tears about to spill down her cheeks."Oops! Sorry! I got a bit too excited, haha!" Minami said, her voice becoming quieter and quieter. "Anyway, nothing to do with that, but my funny pen ran out of ink..."Narumi wanted to scold her but couldn't help thinking: Mom said she was waiting for me! And she just said she was excited! That means she was bored without me and is super happy to see me! Minami loves me so much!!Minami had unknowingly won her sister over.Narumi smiled from ear to ear and said, "It's okay."Then she asked, "Did you want to see me?""Yes! I have stuff to tell you!""Oh!! Perfect, I do too!"The sisters settled in, one on the bed, the other in the desk chair, and shared all the exciting events of their day.While Minami recounted her race against Asayoshi, she couldn't help but add some exaggerations. Narumi noticed but quickly got caught up in the story. As laughter echoed between them, their father, Shinsuke, returned from work and decided to check in on his daughters.He quickly left the room, overwhelmed by the girls' intense bond. They continued as if nothing had happened. The more the conversation progressed, the more Narumi's cheerful mood seemed to waver.Before Minami could address it, dinnertime arrived. In stark contrast to their earlier joy, the meal was quieter, the conversations more serious, touching on deeper themes like manipulation and the book Azumi was reading.After dinner, Narumi went upstairs to shower but was stopped by her sister, who dragged her into her room to continue their conversation."Tell me, is something wrong?"Narumi closed the door, her tone shifting: "There's a girl at school I have a problem with.""I knew it!" Minami thought to herself. Eager to hear more, she sat up straight, listening intently."She's... a bit strange. She's studious, nothing unusual there, but—""She doesn't have any friends, does she?" Minami interjected, her face tense with anticipation."Yes! Exactly!" Narumi replied excitedly, clapping her hands."I knew it... But for her to be a problem for Narumi?" Minami thought.Narumi grabbed a lollipop and started thinking aloud while sprawling across her sister's bed:

"She doesn't want to be my friend, that's a fact. And yet I haven't done anything wrong."

Minami's excitement began to fade, her expression growing more serious. "Why do you want to be friends with her if you know she prefers to be alone?""Because I can't stand seeing her by herself. I know she needs to be surrounded by others, and deep down, she wants it too."Minami stared at the ceiling, now reflecting as well: "That's true... How do I even make friends?"Narumi suddenly sat up and turned to her sister: "I don't know how to explain it, but I can feel it! She wants companionship; she wants friends! So I'm not going to give up on her just because she seems cold toward me!""Y-You're raising your voice at me like I said something!"The two sisters exchanged smiles. After a moment, Minami spoke again: "And how do you plan to approach someone who doesn't want to be your friend?""Having friends doesn't mean she has to be friends with me specifically. I've observed all the students and picked out ten who would get along with her really well! All I have to do is—""No," Minami interrupted, annoyed. "You can't give her a preselected list of friends she could have! That's ridiculous!""H-Huh? But it's so she can be surrounded by the best people! You can tell she's sensitive, so—""Doesn't matter." Minami crossed her arms, even more defensive. "Just because she doesn't match 100% with someone, you're going to stop her from having amazing adventures? Stop it, Narumi."Narumi, thinking she was doing the right thing, began to question herself. But her sister added:

"Relationships aren't calculated. They don't work like that and shouldn't work like that. If you're this... calculated around her, I'm sure she's picked up on it and is completely shutting down."

Narumi looked a bit lost. Scratching her head, she glanced at her sister: "But until now, I've always done things this way, and I've never been wrong."Grumbling, Minami replied: "Well, maybe reconsider some of your friendships! Sorry, that was harsh."Narumi turned her head, signaling for her sister to continue. Minami took a deep breath and finished her thought: "Can you put your pride aside for a moment and listen to your big sister? That's probably why you're hitting a wall with her! Be natural, forget your overthinking! Approach her as you are—do the first thing that comes to mind!"Narumi didn't seem entirely convinced. But wanting to make her sister happy, she silently resolved to approach her target naturally. Their exchange ended with a knowing smile and a warm hug.After thanking Minami, Narumi left the room and closed the door behind her. At that moment, Minami flopped onto her bed: "So that's just how I make friends."END OF CHAPTER