It was grief.
That's what made her want to kill herself. Not a stupid boyfriend, but grief. Grief. She's been out of the internet because she's been grieving. She's been alone and grieving.
"Jesus Christ, what kind of drug did those medics gave her?" Otou-san gasped, holding the now empty needle with which he sedated her, as I still held her in my arms after she kicked me really fucking hard.
She's strong. "Ahjussi," I glared at Daniel as I turned to sat Yeji in the bed again, her frame now angelic, no trace of the burning wrath, guilt, pain, and grief we had just seen in her eyes, the despair. "We need to have a serious talk," I hissed at him and he swallowed, avoiding my eyes, and as the two nurses arrived. "She wounded her hands, take care of her and clean this place," I directed them, since nobody else was stepping up.
When they nodded, we left the room and I grabbed Daniel and made him come with us. We stayed silent the whole time, Four shielding Abby who looked absolutely devastated. I wouldn't be surprised if she evolved PTSD after this first meeting with her twin sister.
As we got to the huge living room where everyone else was waiting for us, given the look on their faces, it was obvious they heard everything. There was no not listening to that, given how Yeji screamed the whole time as if she had really lost it. I wouldn't be surprised if she did, after all she just threw at us back there. We didn't even get to tell her we're in Chicago.
And when no one said anything after I threw Daniel at my side on the couch, I decided to speak up, because I was getting really stressed, "Spill it, ahjussi. Everything," I hissed at him and he flinched. "More hostile than that she can't get, what's your bargaining coin now? Speak!" I grabbed him by the neck, almost losing my shit.
I had it not been for my cousin Diego holding me by my arm, on my right, I would have definitely done something stupid out of anger. "The dude one be able to speak if you strangle him, Dai!"
"Fuck off," I hissed, releasing Daniel. "Speak, ahjussi."
"Why… why did she blame me?" Abby cried.
"Is it true?" Zio asked haunted, broken. "Licy… is she…"
"Fuck," Daniel cursed, trembling, covering his face with his hands. "Fuck. She's not like that," he cried. "Missy is not like that. She's composed and sarcastic, but she's not like that. I… I've never seen her like that… that was not the Missy I know. My child… she said she was okay…" he cried. "The day before she tried suicide, she was acting like she was okay…"
"IS. IT. TRUE?" Zio yelled at him, losing his shit.
"YES!" Daniel yelled back, hands down, face red in despair. "Is that what you want to know? Yes. That train that left from Sofia to Vienna and had an accident in Serbia that killed everyone on June 15th? Felicity was in it," he hissed. "Felicity, aunt Serenity, uncle Hector, and Kit. Harmony and Julien? They died years ago in an accident, leaving Kit's guard with her sister, making him Mischief's little brother. But you can't handle the truth."
"Spill. Every-thing. Ahjussi!" I slapped the back of his head.
He glared at me furiously, then to zio. "Felicity suffered an accident when she arrived at Sofia, almost 18 years ago, when she left you in Italy. She hit her head in the roller stairs of the airport and got into early labor. But that's not where the problem lies," he clenched his jaw, "she lost all of her memory from the previous year. She forgot everything about you, about how she got pregnant, about Italy, and about things that happened before she even met you. She was living her life one day, and in the other she was miraculously giving birth to twins, only to have one of the girls lost. That's how it was for her."
"She didn't leave you. Her mom called her and asked her to come back to Sofia because her father had suffered a car accident, that's why she hurriedly left Italy. Missy never knew about any of you until last month. Felicity was an absolutely skilled hacker, and she dedicated those last years entirely to find her missing daughter," he pointed to Abby. "She could only think of you, she became obsessed, and she destroyed Mischief's life in the process. She abused her, gaslight her, and forced her to be a hacker, just to then force her to waste her life away trying to find you."
"No… no… Felicity… she wouldn't do that," zio gasped.
"Who do you think fucked Missy's mental health? Felicity did. You think you know her just because she was amazing when she was in love with you?" He scoffed. "I know what I'm talking about. She never gave two shits to Missy, the one who was a mother to her was Harmony, and when she died, a part of Missy died too. That's why she treasured Georgi Kit so much, he was the sweetest child you can imagine, and while Missy had him like a brother, Felicity constantly belittled her for it. Saying she wasn't his sister, that she was Ari's, and that she should dedicate herself to finding her sister and not being with Kit."
"That made Missy angry, but she didn't fight back, she never did. I was always with her, playing the role of dad when her grandpa couldn't, because her grandparents too, belittled her many times. I always cleaned up for her, whenever she did something bad, because I knew she would break if she didn't let go of her anger, of her pain. So, if that meant she would be considered an arsonist, then so be it. I'll have her back, always."
"Losing her memories and then losing Ari broke Felicity. She was never the same, she grew paranoid, crazy even. She would then project all of her problems on Missy and attack her, sometimes physically, all because she didn't look like her, she was the one who stayed, she was supposedly safe. And when Missy began to grow distant from reality, she threw the kid to the hands of a psychiatrist, and made her be medicated since she was a little kid for it. Just because she didn't listen to her, didn't want to."
"Those pills she had to take, were the ones that she almost died by an overdose back in the pool," he stared at his hands. "Back in June, if I'm not wrong, she had just come back from Drago's house, after catching him cheating, beating him and Corina up, and setting everything on fire, when she got back home. She was heartbroken, and Felicity couldn't even see the pain in her daughter's eyes, how she was slowly withering away. She began to scream at her, to say horrible things…"
"They both said bad things, but Felicity was wrong. She told Missy she was unlovable, unwanted, that she was the wrong daughter, that wasn't enough, that she hated her, that Missy was a disgrace in her life, and that she should be helping her find Ari instead of dating around. She had gotten some kind of lead on finding you, and she agreed to meet up with whoever this person with the lead was, on Vienna, which was why they were in the train for. She told Missy to pack up because she would go with them in the next morning and Missy finally screamed back at her. She told Felicity she was hurt, that she hated her, hated all she did to her, that she was a horrible mom, that she never wanted to see her again, and that she was not going with them to Vienna."
He swallowed, "I was not there, but her grandmother told me all of it when she called me to take care of… her arson episode that night. Missy has also been haunted by nightmares related to this ever since. She was sleeping when the accident happened, I ran to her house to see her, and she had just come down the stairs, she was unaware, her phone had died, so she left it in her room charging, and when I told her to turn in the news, and she saw the accident, she broke. She screamed in horror and pain and guilt, and cried like never before, on my arms. She became a ghost ever since the accident, the first time she spoke after that was in September."
"I was in the living room of my house, where she began to stay, with Sofija, the director of Missy's family conglomerate, that she inherited, who's an aunt to Missy, when she came down looking alive again, clean, hair washed, and insisting on finding her old phone."