The first week of senior year was a flurry of new faces, new subjects, and new expectations. Among the most intriguing was our advisory class, the contemporary arts subject, a space full of artists and filled with their vibrant colors, the smell of paint, and the soft rustle of sketching pencils. Our teacher, an energetic woman with a twinkle in her eyes, had a unique project in mind to kickstart the year.
To my surprise, I was paired with Gavvy. The news sent a ripple of shock through me, stirring up a mixture of emotions. However, I knew it was a way to understand his side and get to know his reasons on why he left without saying a word, and to uncover the layers of complexity that had formed around him.
Our task was to create an art piece that showcases our understanding of our partner. It was a challenge that required a deep dive into the personality and behavior of another person, a task that demanded empathy and insight. Though I already knew what Gavvy likes and what his behavior is, I just focus on writing a short story that foretells my version of his perspective through the view of a different person.
The day ended with our teacher assigning us a task to present in front of the class. We were given a week to prepare, and as the school day concluded, I felt a sense of relief. Knowing Gavvy's unpredictable nature, I decided not to engage with him anymore. Just as I was about to exit the school gate, I heard Gavvy call out my name. I chose to ignore it, quickening my pace until I was out of sight. I glanced back one last time, but he was nowhere to be seen.
On my way home, I couldn't shake off the feeling that someone was following me. I quickened my pace, and just as I was about to enter my house, someone grabbed me. I managed to break free and turned around to see Gavvy. A mix of anger and confusion washed over me. I confronted him, "Why did you do that? You're really getting on my nerves!"
Gavvy responded, "I'm sorry, but I think we need to work together to finish the artwork earlier." I retorted, "What for? We already know each other, isn't that enough? Besides, I thought you didn't know me? Why are you acting like this now?" He replied, "Look, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to say that. I was just... playing around."
Overwhelmed with anger and hurt, I asked him, "Then why did you disappear? You didn't even visit me or text me!" Tears welled up in my eyes as the pain of his actions hit me, I started to cry. I was catching my breath so much that I couldn't stop sobbing. Gavvy remained silent, offering me comfort instead.
Just then, my mom opened the door and saw us. I wiped my tears and tried to calm myself and entered the house. She invited Gavvy inside. Despite my reluctance, I had no choice but to agree. I went to my room to change and forgot to lock the door. Gavvy walked in and saw me undressed. I yelled at him to get out, but he closed the door and jumped at me. I told him to get off me but he wouldn't budge, I threatened to shout, but he silenced me with a kiss, then I could feel his hands on my body and he started to lick my neck. But I managed to push him away and called him a pervert. After I got dressed, my mom called us for snacks.
We went downstairs to eat, and afterwards, Gavvy followed me back to my room. I told him to leave, but he insisted on staying. He promised not to cross any boundaries, and I reluctantly agreed. We then discussed our plans for the assignment. Gavvy revealed that he would sing the song he sang when we first met, with some added lyrics. When he asked about my plan, I told him I would write a short story. With that settled, we began working on our tasks.
Then Gavvy, with his passion and love for music, composed a heartfelt love song for me. He went to get his guitar and start tuning in. I couldn't help but feel a sense of anticipation as he strummed the first few chords. His voice, soft yet filled with emotion, echoed through the room, painting a picture of our shared past, our unspoken feelings, and his longing for a connection.
On my part, I chose to express my understanding of Gavvy through the written word. I wrote a story titled "The Diary of Ethan". It was a tale of love, hurt, and the devastating consequences of repeated mistakes. Ethan, the protagonist, was deeply in love with Liam, but his unpredictable behavior led to a cycle of pain and forgiveness. This cycle tragically ended with Liam taking his own life.
I poured my heart and soul into the story, each word reflecting my perception of Gavvy. I painted Ethan as a charming and charismatic character, much like Gavvy. However, Ethan's unpredictable behavior was a reflection of the complexity I saw in Gavvy. The tragic ending of the story embodied the pain I felt from the distance that had grown between us.
The day of the presentation arrived, and the air was thick with curious and creative minds of every artist in the classroom. As each of my classmates presented their art pieces, I couldn't help but feel a flutter of nervous excitement. When it was our turn, I took a deep breath, steadied my trembling hands, and began to read my story.
As the words flowed, I could feel the room's atmosphere shift. My classmates listened in fascinating attention, their eyes reflecting a mix of surprise and empathy. When I finished, the room was silent for a moment before erupting into applause. The teacher, visibly moved, asked us to explain our pieces.
Gavvy explained that his song was a tribute to our friendship, a melody that held his deepest feelings for me. On my part, I explained that "The Diary of Ethan" was a reflection of my complicated relationship with Gavvy. I described Gavvy as a person who was charming and sweet, yet held a side of him that was difficult to understand.
The class ended with a sense of newfound understanding and respect for each other. Our art pieces had not only revealed our perceptions of each other but also brought us closer despite our complicated past.
As I walked out of the classroom that day, I couldn't help but feel a sense of accomplishment that will remain in my memories for years. I had managed to express my feelings through my story, and in doing so, I had taken a step towards understanding Gavvy better. It was a day that marked a turning point in our friendship, a day I would remember for years to come.
(Van's Literary piece)
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The Diary of Ethan.
In the heart of a bustling crowd, in where the city lights are brighter than the stars and life moves with unstoppable momentum, I, Ethan, found my existence. I recently moved to this town. I am unfamiliar with this city of a million stories. Among these tales, I found Liam. He was a kind soul, a beacon of warmth in the city's harsh landscape. His laughter was a melody that softened the city's cruel symphony, his eyes sparkled brighter than the city's neon lights. I was drawn to him, and we quickly found a rhythm amidst the town's chaos.
Our bond blossomed into a beautiful love story, a sanctuary amidst the metropolis' relentless pace. His happiness filled the air, his stolen glances spoke volumes, and our love became a melody that played against the town's constant hum. But, in my foolishness, I played a cruel game of manipulation and deceit.
I was unfaithful, to Liam. My motivations were self centered and superficial. I was enticed by the excitement of pursuing someone, the rush of adrenaline that came with it. My ego clouded my judgment as I sought validation for my charisma and appeal. It didn't occur to me that in my actions I was breaking the heart of the one individual who genuinely cared for me.
My disclosure hit Liam like a big, solid fist in the stomach. His heart, which had been so full of love for me, broke into a million pieces. The pain of betrayal still lies in those eyes of his, as though it was a reminder to my foolishness. His world came crashing around him; his very love for me became a source of unbearable pain, and he was lost, drowning in a sea of betrayal and heartache. But his love for me was so strong that he forgave my mistakes.
We reconciled, and our love story for a while was the same as in the beginning, but now it was full of anger because I deceived him. He couldn't stop loving me. His heart, bruised and scarred, but I'm hoping he would forgive me someday. This spiraled into the toxic cycle, each cycle chipping away at his spirit. His once vibrant eyes had lost their sparkle, his laughter that was once a melody was now but a far-off echo. It molds a shadow of himself living in the land of woe and betrayal. These were filled with misery, sleepless nights haunted by the ghost of our love. He spiraled steadily down into a dark pit until he hit rock bottom.
The burden of my actions was heavy; I bore it with so much guilt. I was his source of pain, I authored his misery. Drowned in an ocean of regret, my heart ached with guilt at what I had done to him. I longed for his forgiveness, I longed to make it up, but it was now too late. The effect of my actions would last long. The depth of the pain I had inflicted was a burden I carried every waking moment.
Liam released me from my cunning love chains. He sought comfort in the embrace of another man. I watched from a distance what he found for himself, and the taste of a strange mixed feeling of regret, thirst, and painful understanding seeped through me. Understanding in the fullness of my feelings towards Liam had come to me, at last, understanding how I betrayed myself and called forth with my dishonest actions, and what I called was love. But it was far too late.
However his new love proved to be a whole lot away from being perfect. His new lover turned out to be very abusive, and Liam got only some moments of happiness, and then time would ripen for fear. Liam, who once was a source of warmth, was a man living amidst constant fears and despair. Every day, it abounded with dread, and the nights were taken over by nightmares.
Desperate and scared, Liam turned towards me for help. But I was still grappling with my feelings and my guilt, and so I've pushed Liam back to his abusive lover. This cycle of abuse and rejection continued, pushing Liam further into losing hope. Liam was overwhelmed with pain and despair, he felt trapped in a corner with broken spirit, heart wrecked past recognition.
His life became an ever present thunderstorm of fear, pain, betrayal. He took his own life, leaving the whole city shocked and I was just drowning in my own guilt and regret. I was about to step up, to finally accept my love for Liam, save him from the monster I had pushed him towards. But it was too late. Liam was gone.
I was alone in the city where joy and love went mad in go-arounds, echoing from the walls, pounding at my ear. Each passing day became a reminder only to me and my lost guilt and selfishness; a dagger of regret had pierced my heart, and my soul was imprisoned by the walls of my making. My guilt was the constant, nagging feeling of my actions, my undying guilt for the pain I had put Liam through. Every face I looked upon wore the simulacrum of Liam's, every sound was some answerable to his laughing, every moment seemed to glide, a phantom, from our spent time together.
In the depths of my despair, I write this diary, a testament to our tragic love story. It is a chronicle of my guilt, my regret, and my sorrow. It is a confession of my sins, a plea for forgiveness that I know I do not deserve. In this diary, I wanted to leave my final words. "Loving Liam was in fact pure love, happiness and true, may you forgive me. I am now going to follow you."
Today, I, Ethan will be joining Liam for us to be together in the afterlife.
-Ethan
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crdts
editor - (editor)
Clint - I wanna cuddle with you again.