I felt something cold on my head and someone was holding my hand tightly.
I tried to open my eyes but they were burning with pain.
I tried to sit up but my body was feeling so week.
And my throat, it was too dry and sore.
Every part of me was aching very badly.
The only comfort was from the hands holding mine.
I tried to remember what happened and all those terrific memories clouded my mind again.
I felt a pang of pain in my heart.
And a drop of tear rolled down my eyes.
Kartik forgot me.
The only thing running in my head.
And someone squeezed my hand.
And then creased my head slowly.
I know who's touch is this.
I know.
I gained courage and jerked my hand off.
He forgot me.
He left me alone.
I woke up and sat at a side of bed holding my knees.
"Shivi, baby come to me hmm" He tried to pull me to him but I moved more back.
Tears started falling down my eyes.
"You..... Forgot.... Me" I said wobbling.
"Shivi bacha... Listen to me once please" He said in pleading tone and tried to held my arm again.
"Noooo.... You left me alone" I said with sore throat.
My head started bursting again.
My throat is hurting too.
And a strange pain is there in my chest.
"Shiviii" He said and pulled me onto his lap.
I wiggled in his hold.
"Leave meeeee, just leaveee me"
I said with hurt dripping from my voice.
I don't want him.
He too left me.
Like everyone else.
He too forgot me.
Like everyone else.
He too......
"Shiviiii" He now said in authorotative voice.
And I stopped screaming.
I just looked at his eyes.
And my vision was blurry with tears.
And I broke in his arms.
He was holding me tightly and I broke.
I didn't want to.
But I broke.
I sobbed.
I cried.
I gasped for air.
I cried uncontrollably.
I screamed with pain.
"Whyyyy Kartikkkk Whyyy" I screamed clutching his shirt tightly.
"Why you didn't came" I cried.
My eyes were burning.
My throat was dry.
But my heart???
It's paining too much.
He held my leg and wrapped them around his torso.
He pulled me closer and started rubbing my back while holding me tightly.
"Whyyy Kartikk?? I was waiting for you! I wassss" And I coughed and cried too much.
I hid my head in his chest and let all the emotions flood out my self through tears.
I was scared.
I was frightened.
I was alone.
I never felt this much pain even when Bhai humilated me.
Never.
"I know I am burden for everyone. Just leave me. JUST LEAVE ME" I said pushing him away from me.
He held me tightly and cupped my face.
"Shivi, Shivi, look at me" He said.
"Noooooo Leave meee!!!" I screamed again and tried to free myself.
"Shivi" He said again and made me look into his eyes.
I realized his eyes too were red and filled with tears.
"Please" His gaze softened.
I looked at him with streams of tears still falling down my eyes.
"Why you didn't came" I said in an inaudible voice this time.
He touched his forehead with mine and closed his eyes while his hands were still cupping my face.
"Am sorry" Those were the only two words he said.
But, Pain. Regret. Guilt. Suffer. Suffocation. All were clearly visible in his voice.
I don't know what to believe!!
I don't know!!
He opened his eyes and looked into mine.
"Am sorry sweeta" He said again.
"Am really sorry" He repeated.
I sniffled.
"Why you didn't come?" My heart wants to know the reason.
Because somewhere deep inside, my heart is not accepting that he forgot me!!
"Am sorry mera bacha" He said wiping my tears off.
"I didn't knew you were alone! Or else you know your Kartik would have never let you stay there" He said creasing my cheeks with his thumb.
I looked at him and more tears left my eyes.
He know I have no one other than him. Still he is saying this!!
I know I am behaving selfish!
But I was frightened of loosing the only person I have, yesterday.
That thought was killing me!!
I didn't know what to do! Where to go!!
That moment was horrible!!
I looked at him and pushed him away.
I stood up from his lap and moved straight to my room without looking back.
I don't want to talk to him.
"Shivi baby listen to me once please" He followed me but I locked the door from inside.
I sat by the door and curled up to my knees.
I sniffled.
"Baby okay don't talk to me! But atleast have something hmm" He sat banging the door.
"Mera bachaa please open it"
He requested again.
"Like you care if I die" I cried from inside.
"Shiviiii!!! Don't you dare to" He stated in hard tone.
"Bachaa please" But soften his tone again.
"Go!! Go where you were yesterday, don't call me" I said angrily and stood up wiping my tears.
I went to washroom and started the shower.
I let cold water hit my body parts.
May be to wash off all the thoughts!!
May be to wash off all those terrible moments!!!
But IT ISN'T WORKING!!
I stayed there for half an hour and my body almost went numb.
My stomach too started aching now along with my throat.
I finally stepped outside and wore my clothes.
I heard Kartik was still calling me!!!
But I DON'T WANT TO TALK TO HIM....!!!
HE FORGOT ME!!!
With wet hair, I sat on the bed for a while.
"Shiviiiiiiiii, atleast LISTEN DAMN IT!!!!" He said angrily and I heard something breaking.
I flinched.
"Shivi, I'll break this door am telling you" He said in low commanding voice.
"JUST GO" I said loudly.
He didn't speak for a moment and then formed words in soft voice again.
"I know! I know am at fault! I know I hurt you! I know! But please open this door! I swear I'll not come near you! Just have something"
"I am not hungry" I replied.
"Shivi now this is enough! Open it!!!" He said in a strict tone.
"What happened" I heard another voice.
Raj bhai.
"She locked herself inside" Kartik replied.
"Kiddo, What is this behavior hmmm aren't you a good girl?"
Raj bhai said.
I remembered he too didn't picked up the call.
He too didn't come to me!!
"I am not TALKING to you too" I stated from inside.
And I heard a sigh.
"No one is saying you to talk. Just open this door. " Raj bhai added strictly.
Now too everyone is scolding me.
Now too they are commanding me!!!
And Raj bhai too is behaving this way!!!
And I started crying.
"You both are too bad!!! Don't....... Don't talk to me" I said wobbling.
"Achaaa achaa achaa okkkk ronaaa nahi please am sorry am sorry I was kidding" Raj bhai said quickly.
"Go away" Kartik yelled at him.
And I cried more.
More tears left my eyes.
"Bachaa, no one would yell at you!! Am here na... Please come out!" Kartik said softly.
"Like you were not the one doing same few minutes ago" I said sniffling.
And I heard someone hitting the wall loudly.
"Am sorry! Am sorry! I wasn't yelling at you! I was scolding myself. Really" He said calmly.
"Please bahrrr aa jao meri jaan" He pleaded.
"Huhh" I replied.
"Shivuuu, I have brought your favorite ice cream and chocolates. Please come its melting" Raj bhai said.
They really have taken me as a kid!!
First they left me alone.
Then they scolded me.
And now they are giving me bribe.
"I DON'T WANT ANYTHING"
I replied.
"Okay then, stand away from the door am breaking it" Kartik said.
Hawwwww!!!
"Nooo You won't!!! If you'll break it I'll not talk to you ever" I said.
"Ok manzoor hai! Aap hume saza dein manzoor hai! Khudh ko dein yeh hume bardaasht nahi!!!" He replied from other side of the door.
I runned and sat against the door.
"I am sitting in front of the door.
Break it! Break it! " I said.
He hit the door with his hand.
"SHIVANYA" He replied.
I lowered my bottom lips.
"I was thinking right!! No one loves me now!! No one does" And tears started rolling down my cheeks.
"Meri jaaan meri jaaan listen to me!! Please open it!! I'll do whatever you say! Just whatever! But please open this fuc--- I mean this door" He said controlling his anger.
I folded my arms and sat there.
Without replying.
"Shivu apne bhai ki hi baat maan lo please" Raj bhai requested.
"You both just Go and handle your business. Am fine" I replied.
And I heard a growl.
Kartik can't scare me now!!
Am not opening this door!!
"Shivi bacha aapki health kharab ho jaygi! Your Doctor uncle have given some medicines. You need to take them! " Kartik said.
"Huhh" I replied.
He hit the wall three times, making me flinch again.
I keep on sitting there.
But now no voice was coming from the other end of the door.
Is he gone?
I looked at that ring and a tear fell on that ring.
And when I looked up, Kartik was standing near my room's balcony with folded arms.
I looked at him angrily and then turned around towards the door.
He is too bad!!!!
I heard his approaching steps towards me and I keep on looking at the wall angrily.
I'll not talk to him!!!
I settled beside me and tried to move my hair strand but I moved my face aside.
He sighed and looked at me.
"Sweetaaa" He said softly.
Ughhh!! His sugary sugary talksss....!!!
CONTROL SHIVI YOU ARE ANGRY!!
"My kiddo is angry hmm" He said trying to pull me to him but I shifted forward.
"Lemme check" He said and touched his finger on my head when I winced.
"Hawwww!! It's too hot" He said dramatically.
"Huh" I replied and turned to his opposite side.
He held my waist and pulled me on his lap with my back touching his front.
"Kartikk, Leave me" I wiggled in his hold.
"Not in this life!! Not in any life" He replied caging me in his arm.
"But you already left me yesterday" I replied with heavy heart.
Hs sighed again.
"I know, I know I can't change that thing ever! I know I am not worthy for you!! But trust me bachaa My heart just beats for you!! Even you are the only reason for my beating heart!! And how can anyone leave the reason for whom he is living hmm??" He said looking into my eyes.
"Just give me one chance! Just one chance! I promise I'll never leave your side again!! Never!!" He said and pecked my forhead.
I can't stay angry with him!!
Now my heart is aching!!
I looked at him with tears in my eyes, "Kartik, aap jante hain na, aap nahi honge toh koi nahi hoga mera" I said.
He hugged me tightly,
"Jese mera koi aur hai is duniya mei aapke siway"
I held his arms wrapped around my front tightly into a hug and said, "Phir kabhi chod kar toh nahi jaoge na"
He snuggled into my neck,
"Markar bhi nahi"
And I laid my head on his arms clutching them tightly,
" I love you" I whispered.
"Am sorry" He said with guilt.
And pecked my neck.
"Hmmm" I hummed and tears left my eyes.
I noticed his hand covered with bandage.
"Hawww Kartik, what happened here??" I asked tensed.
"Where" He asked with his head still on my shoulder.
I creased his band aided hand and looked at him.
"Ohh here, nothing!" He replied casually.
"Comeee let's have something now" He added.
And stood up picking me up.
"Wait....!!! Tell me what happened to your hand" I asked wrapping my hands around his neck.
He opened the door and replied,
"Nothing sweeta!!! Just minor injury"
"Do minor injuries also need this much bandage?" I asked him thinning my eye brows.
"Where's Raj" He said reaching outside.
I too looked around.
Where Bhai went???
"Hereeeeee!!! Aa jaooo!!
Raj special breakfast is ready" He said from downstairs.
Kartik smiled and touched my nose with his.
"Let's go" He said.
On reaching down stairs, Raj bhai looked at me.
And I diverted my eyes.
I am amgry from him too!!!
"Awwleee!!" Raj bhai said.
Kartik gently made me sit on a chair and bhai stood beside me.
He kneeled down near me and held his ears.
"Am sorry" He said softly.
I looked at him and folded my arms.
"Ohh itna gussa" He said looking at me.
I didn't replied.
And Kartik was just smiling.
"Would a chocolate muffin work" Raj bhai asked.
And I still didn't responded.
"Chocolate ice cream??" He asked again.
"No??" He added.
"A pretty dress?" He asked.
I gave him a side eye and again diverted my eyes.
"Okay thennnnnn" He stood up and started tickling me.
"Haaa haaa nooo bhaiii noooo" I said laughing.
"Would this work hmm??" He said tickling me moreee.
"Ahhhhhhh ahhhh nooooo don't do thiissssss" I said controlling my laughhh.
"Sayy hmm say" He said.
"Achaaa achaaa okkkkkkkk itsss okkk but not thisss please ahhhh stop ha ha haaaa!!" I said laughing.
And Raj bhai too laughed.
Kartik too was laughing.
"It was an easy job" Raj bhai said ruffling my hair.
"That was not so nice of you Bhai" I said looking at him.
"And you locked yourself, that was nice hmm???" He said folding his arms.
"I..... Ahh" I tried to form words and then looked at Kartik for help.
"Okkk enough! Stop troubling my kiddo! Let's have food" Kartik said.
He held my both hands and pulled me into his lap.
I looked at Bhai and giggled.
"It's ok it's ok! Some day I'll catch you off guard" Raj bhai said teasing.
"That day would never come!" Kartik said hitting his head with mine softly.
And I smiled.
Raj bhai sighed dramatically looking at us.
"Acha baba Okay!! See what I made" He said opening the lid.
And all the surrounding filled with fragrance.
I gasped in surprise,
"Alooo ke parantheee"
"Yeahhhhhhhh Yourrrr favorite, I especially made this early morning for you!!!!" Bhai said serving in my plate.
Kartik looked at me smiling.
Raj bhai took a morsel and stretched his hand towards me.
And at the same time Kartik too took a morsel.
I looked at them both confused.
"Shivi, first I took this bite" Bhai said looking at me.
"But still my Sweeta would take my bite, right sweeta" Kartik said.
I looked at both of them.
I can't disappoint either of them uffff!!!
Krishnaa jii....!!!
I held both of their hands and took bite from both the morsels at same time.
My mouth filled with bite and I giggled.
Kartik chuckled looking at me and Bhai shaked his head smiling.
Everything feel so fine!!
So perfect!!
Like nothing happened few hours ago!!!
Me with my both the saviors.
Bhai and Kartik....!!
I looked both of them and tears gathered in my eyes.
They both looked at me tensed and asked,
"What, what happened sweeta???" Kartik asked
"Is Is it spicy???" Bhai asked.
I shaked my head in no.
"Thank you for being with me" I said with tears.
"Oyeee don't!!! Now you'll say us thank you hmm??" Kartik said slightly hitting my head with his fingers.
"Thanks to you kiddo!" Bhai said giving me another morsel.
And Kartik wiped my tears and pecked my cheeks squeezing me in his arms.
___________________________
"Okay Shivu, now am going to office byee" Bhai said ruffling my head.
I blinked my eyes at him and he went.
I looked at Kartik, "Aren't you going?"
"Nahh!! Today am all yours" He said rubbing his nose to my neck.
"Only today?" I asked him.
He took a deep breath while nibbling my collar bone.
I hissed holding his hands.
"My every second is yours My love" He said in a whisper.
"Kartikkk" I said with deep breaths as he sucked my neck with his arms wrapped around me.
"Hmmm sweeta" And he groaned in his throat and turned me to his side.
His one hand held both my hands behind my back in a lock and other one was behind my neck holding me securely in place.
He pulled me towards him with my locked hand and started placing soft kisses all over my neck.
I tried to take his name but that came out as a moan.
And he groaned again.
He licked my neck line and then made me look into his eyes.
He then softly kissed my lower jaw and then my chin.
"I missed you baby" He said in a low deep voice, "Am sorry" He added and other moment he took both my hands and wrapped them around his neck.
He picked me up with his lips over mine, kissing softly and passionately like there's no tomorrow.
Tomorrow? Like there's no other second.
This kiss was different.
I can feel passion and possession in it.
He sucked my lower lip and then parted my lips open with his tongue.
His tongue explored my inner and I let him do.
My breathe was heavy and my heart was throbbing fast as he moved upstairs.
I held his shoulder tightly as he was pulling me more into him.
He opened his mouth and took all my lips into his devouring every inch.
I gasped for air and he left me and kicked the door open.
"Kartikk" I tried to say again while gasping for air and he made me lay on the bed softly and hovered over me.
"Kartikk what are youu---" I tried to form words but his lips were again on mine.
He ate mine like he is hungry for decades. But it wasn't hurtful! It was slow and with love.
His hands were on my thighs and creased them making me shiver.
He held my waist and made me sit again on his lap facing him, but he never left my lips.
He was pulling back to let me breathe only to kiss me again with more passion.
He held me closer to him and his hands slid under my T-shirt on my back.
And my breath stopped.
I opened my eyes wide and looked at his closed eyes.
I tightly held his shoulder as he feather touched my bare back.
He moved his finger along my back bone, sending chills down my spine.
I am no more breathing.
He held my waist from both side and pulled back his lips with a sloppy sound.
"Breathe shivi Breathe" He said in his deep throaty voice and pecked my neck.
I gasped air inside me.
"Kartikk" I whispered.
"Hmm sweeta" He said touching his head with mine and his hands were still wrapped around my bare waist.
"Wh--what a--re youhhh do--do--doing" I tried to form words as he was taking deep breaths.
"Just feeling my baby close to me" And by saying this he pulled me more closer and my front collided with his chest.
I kept my hands on his chest.
"To whom you belong to hmm??" He asked with possessiveness and took my earlobe between his lips.
I took a deep breath.
And he nibbled my earlobes.
I hissed slightly.
"To whom you belong to sweeta" He asked again.
I clutched my hands on his shirt and tried to form words,
"You--" I replied.
He nibbled again.
"Nameee it baby girl" He said.
"Youu Ka--kartik" I replied.
He pecked my jaw softly.
And then with his hand on my back he made me lay on the bed softly.
He hovered over me and lowered down.
He slid my tshirt up to my belly button and my chest heaved up and down.
I curled my toes and held the bedsheet tightly.
He looked at me and pecked my belly.
He placed soft kisses on my belly button and sucked it for a second.
I can feel a strange feeling in my leg.
I raised my waist to ease the tension between my legs but he held my waist and kept it in position while licking my belly button.
A wave of emotions are flowing inside me and my heart is throbbing so fast.
What is this happening!!
And my brain went numb.
He held my hands holding tightly the bedsheet in his and pecked them.
"You can hold mine" He said and held my hand in his hand.
I held his fingers tightly so tightly that I know it would leave marks.
He creased my belly with his other hand.
"Kartikkkk" The only words that left my mouth.
He held the hem of my shirt and looked up at me.
"Are you comfortable Shivi" He asked with seriousness yet in a calm tone this time.
But Impatience was clear from his face.
"Look at me and tell me, are you comfortable" He asked again.
"Don't think about me Or anything else! Just tell me are you comfortable??" He asked again.
So many thoughts clouded my head.
I just looked at him and he hovered over me again and pecked my lips.
"Sweeta, I won't do anything in which you aren't comfortable. Just tell me to stop and I will" He said softly.
I don't want him to go but....!!!
Ahhh I don't know what to say how to say!!!
I gazed down and he looked at me for a second.
He then pecked my forehead softly and raised to move.
When he was going I held the end of his shirt.
He looked back at me.
Our eyes met and I looked at him, "Are you angry?" I asked.
He smiled and looked at me.
He cupped my face and replied.
"Nahi mera bachaa!! Bilkul nahi....!!! Humne toh aapki rooh se ishq kiya hai!! Aap hamare saath hain kaafi hai" He said creasing my cheek.
I looked at him sadly.
"Am sorry" I said slowly.
"Don't beee!! Ice cream khayee??" He asked.
I happy smile formed on my face and I nodded happily.
He chuckled.
"As you say my princess, sit here I'll bring" He said and pecked my hand.
I creased my head and added.
"I'll be back okay!!"
And I nodded.