I was never 'normal' and I noticed it maybe too late for comfort. There were some things I preferred no one to know about me. However, now is too late for that and I have to deal with my parents and my little sister knowing that I am both a genius and a pariah. I don't let it face me though, I have dealt with both on my own accord even if my family isn't convinced of my solution. I can't blame either, as I myself know it is not sane or enjoyable for me, but it's not their decision and as it stands, I will follow it through the end, like it or not.

I was about 7 years old. I was playing when it dawned on me.

'My classmates are dumb.' 

That was the starting point for my growth as a genius and a pariah. Genius for once as I was just way too good at everything that put my mind into it with no rewards for topics or semantics. It was brutal, the things my peers needed days to learn and understand took me but a few looks and questions to know. The intuition and talent I had for everything was so exaggerated that I always ended up getting the wrong end of the stick.

"Who was the one who painted all the playground with disturbing words?"

The teacher was as always looking for a culprit. It seems this time my 'friends' decided that it was a good idea to draw the 'banned' words they heard at home on the walls of the playground for all to see. They probably thought it was a good idea to share their knowledge between themselves for once and even decided to leave proof of their dealings in plain sight, just as always… 

Who cares anyways right? I always got their backs.

"Leo was, we were playing and he told us to do it." One of them said without any shame. 

'Such a pleasure, go on 'friend' don't let me down.' I didnt even retort as it wasn't the first time and I knew it would only make it way worse. Not even once in all my stay at school did I get to feel like they actually took my words into account. It's hard to take your words at face value when you already got such a bad reputation to start with.

At first it was okay, kind of. I swallowed my pride and didn't say a word. It just wasn't worth it, at least I got the chance to spend my time playing with a few guys on the break and showing my worth at class, leaving all my teachers at school just as dumbfounded as my parents were when they heard my stories at home of my classmate' wrongdoings. Not that they could do much anyways.

As I got older it changed, I knew that my classmates weren't dumb anymore, but they showed no remorse for keeping up with their shitty behavior to me and started to shun me. They even went as far as to warn my few friends, decent ones, that they shouldn't play or talk with freaks or they would label them the same. Obviously I was the freak they were referring to and let's say I didn't take it that well at the time. 

"What do you want freak? Are you going to keep staying there blocking me off? Make way, I need to go pee!" They guy, who was the same who started the 'trend' of "blame it on the freak" even went as far as to shove me out the way, usually I wouldn't care and go on with my day. Today however, it was different, I was tired and disgusted of his and his buddy's behavior. Actually, who am I planning to fool? It was our last year at school and I had the perfect excuse in my head to de-stress myself while taking the trash out. I grabbed the guy by his shirt collar and threw him to the floor and started beating on him. He tried to push me away, but he wasn't expecting my show of defiance and even less my display of strength and dexterity. 

That day I made sure to pummel the guy in the face so much that his parents would find it difficult to recognize him from now on. It wasn't that long till the ruckus was stopped by the teacher on guard, who came running into the bathrooms at the perfect time to see the bully best display of damsel in distress he could muster as I shoved his head onto the disgusting water of the toilet to finish my part. Brilliant! It still stands as a memory I am fond of nowadays. The setting, history behind, the date, damn even the victims performance was better than expected! I remember his show just as well as the anger that I was faced with at the principal's office, not that I cared though, for once the guy was right and it was my fault, but that didn't change a thing for me.

What I wasn't that aware of was the second act that took place at home.

The faces… I am sure that never in my whole life did I see my parents make such a face ever again. I was shocked, stunned and felt miserable. I may have been a genius for my age at the time, but I wasn't ready for that show of disappointment and sadness. Disappointment on me, on my actions, on asking where did they raise me wrong and sadness over what was lost. And it was more than a few falling teeth of my victim. 

They said it wasn't something they expected from me, that they showed me to do better and knew that while I did behave different from the other kids they knew that I was a good boy too. At least that's what I remember of that day. Even worse I knew than more than that they felt betrayed and would not show the same trust for a while. In fact, that became obvious the moment they decided that my sister was better off without knowing anything at all of the events. Well, that was the plan, we all know that types of things spread like wildfire so it was a lost cause.

Nowadays when I think about that dreadful date I find myself lucky that I had such good parents. They took a while, but as they called it, they put me again on the right path. Now is where I let you in on a secret, that's bullshit.

I cared and still care a lot for them and my sister, they raised me with care and love. Making sure I got everything covered just as they did with my sister after. They always tried to make time for us and even when they couldn't they would always make it up for us some other way. 

Regarding my sister, there is nothing much to say, I did my part as a respectful big brother with not much thought till later on when I had a change of heart in regards to her. She was born 4 years after me and always wore a smile since she was little. It was his way of living that made me come to respect her just as much as my parents. And for that, for the things they did for me and the love and care I received from all of them I decided that I would be their perfect child and brother, just for them to be happy. 

Studying hard, having friends just like any other guy, feeling hopeful for the future and all that. Maybe the only real part of me that I showed them was my care for them as I really did care for their well being and feelings. At the end of the day that was the whole point of this charade right?Nothing to win by hiding my care for them, actually, that would probably only worry them more than anything. At some point they all knew the truth, I mean they knew I was a genius in my own right so why did I only keep showing some amazing things at home when I was caught red-handed? The fact that to the outside I didn't show even one bit of my prowess both intellectually and physically was what make it obvious to my sister even while she was already used to it.

Unsurprisingly, they went on living as usual, maybe feeling that there was some kind of reason behind my actions. They didn't like it though, not even one bit I will tell you that, they took every chance they got to hint at it. Every time I got the chance to be in the spotlight like a sport or scientific event to which I was overqualified for my age and they knew I would win they would start their part.And as a genius those kinds of events were common enough to be a pain in the ass.

"Why don't you try it? Who knows, maybe you could be a professional football player or something, aren't you even interested in the money you could get? You are keeping perfectly fit anyways it wouldn't change much."-Mother Olivia

"Leo, aren't you even a little bit interested in discovering new things on your own? Something like being a scientist or the like?"-Father Tony

"Hey Leo, there is a project I need to do for next week about this and I was hoping you could help! Come on brother, I need just a little help. Please?"-Sister Leyla

Sometimes I would find their efforts funny and do as they please, but just as your average guy, maybe too average even, I would take my time to think about the most cliche things that came to mind and made use of it. I am actually really proud of my consistency of average projects and performances, you could say I am a good actor. Those little movements were the things that keep me going with this farce, having fun with them made me feel alive. However, that only leaves me with time at home to train my body and my brain while I get bored at school and feel kind of hollow.

Nowadays I am 19 years old and I find myself listening to this boring lecture about something that I find super boring and already know by heart. Today at least I got a little bit more motivation as I know one of my favorite artists is coming to town. I am humming one of his songs as I make plans to go to his concerts without a care in the world. I had no idea that today it would be a wake up call and a do or die time to show my genius part to the world for the first time in a while. 

What I did know is that the world wasn't ready for me.