"In memory of everything I lost today", I mumble to myself as I raise the full glass to my lips.
But as soon as the rice liquor starts pouring down my throat, my face distorts in an ugly grimace that I struggle hiding.
Instant regret. I remember why I never picked up drinking in high school now.
I know, going for a drink after being laid off is not the best idea, but what can I say ? I'm reluctant to go home now that I know for a fact I won't be able to pay rent.
The idea of never seeing this apartment again despite spending so much time searching for it in the first place makes me want to tear up.
But I can't let myself go if I hope to get back up. I have to stay strong or at least appear to be. Although alcohol will hardly help me with it, I have to admit I don't really have another place to go. Not one that I can go to without being crushed by shame, that is.
"Something sweeter, please." I order from the barmaid before handing her the empty glass.
"I'm afraid this will be your last one, sir. The house has a policy of no alcohol served after ten."
Ten already ? Just for how long have I wandered pointlessly in the city streets before landing here ?
Adjusting my round glasses with a mechanical movement, I glance at a group of noisy students sitting at a back table and, seeing the full bottles they just received, I let out a sigh.
Just as if my body suddenly realizes how late it is, I start to feel hungry. I haven't eaten anything since I left my office at WeLord Games in the morning.
Office that I will never see again.
Funnily enough, I now realize that I don't miss the job itself.
Sure, that feeling of safe stability was nice while it lasted. But I never got any close to my colleagues, and none of the tasks that were ever given to me could be seen as meaningful in any way.
The thing I will definitely miss however is the game I have been working on for the past five years or so.
I joined the development team when the game concept was finished, and as an inveterate fantasy nerd, I immediately fell in love with it.
It had everything I have always admired about fantasy fiction : lovable characters and characters you love to hate, mesmerizing creatures and plants, layered plotlines, breathtaking fight systems and an astounding amount of magic.
In fact, this game was the reason I started playing at all. Before working at WeLord, I did not know games could be this good and I only experienced fantasy through novels or movies.
Looking now at how Threads of Fate managed to completely absorb me in its universe though, I think it is safe to say that not being able to work on it anymore will be the bane of my existence.
'A little bit early, but this one is in anticipation of everything I will lose next.' I think before emptying my glass in one gulp. 'Sweet wine! Not too bad.'
I try forcing myself to think about my life further in the future, to plan something to better my situation, but to no avail. All I can fill my mind with is the upcoming troubles arising from my past mistakes and my complete inability to stand against them.
The trial will most likely be the easy part, since all I will have to do is show up and let my lawyer speak. What comes after will surely be the worst, with all the money I will end up owing and the disastrous state my reputation will be in.
I can try to find another job all I want after that, no matter how good of a developer I am, no one in the field will ever hire me anymore. Although to be fair, I'm not that good at it anyway. Still, valid point.
After putting a couple of banknotes on the counter, I leave the bar or whatever kind of establishment this was, ignoring the chilling cold as my mind is entirely taken by something else. The night will soon be pitch black and the bright colored neon signs trying to sell me random stuff have never appeared so bland before.
Looking straight at my feet, my hands deep in my pockets, I resume my pointless stroll through the city.
All day I have been feeling like something was off with me. I think I should somehow be angry at something ; angry at society, at the company or even at myself. But the only feelings I have right now are sadness and exhaustion. No regret, no remorse, no guilt ; only an overwhelming feeling of resigned helplessness.
At the end of the day, I guess I only get what I deserve for stepping out of the line. Before all this, I always looked for minimal risk and happily lived a life that anyone would call boring. I never studied hard or partied late, I never worked extra hours or gambled my earnings. I only walked the straightest path possible.
But my burning passion for Threads of Fate began to take over one day.
It started slowly, with me bringing confidential game pictures home to use as wallpapers on my personal computer.
Once I figured how easy it was, nothing stopped me from taking other files too. It took me almost a year and countless sleepless nights of coding, but with patience and determination, I managed to steal parts of the game from every department of WeLord and assembled them into a somewhat playable alpha version.
I enjoyed every second of playing the game, but I got proud and cocky and kept stealing files to update my version. As I was only realizing how taking risks was proving beneficial to me, my personality started to change a bit : I became more confident and talkative, more open and adventurous.
People who I thought I could call friends rapidly began to gather around me, but soon enough turned out to be my doom.
Although I still was as careful as could be about not revealing anything, one of them ended up finding out about my little project and low and behold managed to leak it from my own computer.
The second it was online, I knew it was already too late. But as if it was not enough, my version of the still unreleased game gathered insane engagement in a record time. Last time I checked, tens of thousands of downloads from all over the world, growing almost exponentially because of the re-uploads.
It did not even take a day for WeLord to find out I was the cause of this unprecedented crisis. Needless to say, I immediately got caught in a cataclysmic storm involving almost the entire hierarchy.
Yesterday, cohorts of gray suited businessmen kept scolding me from dawn to dusk, each one more vilifying than the other, even though the content of their speech was not late to sound redundant.
As a strong gust of wind tosses my hair across my face, I suddenly become aware that my blind walk brought me in the middle of a bridge, right above the river.
Resting my arms on the parapet, I take a minute to admire the view. The myriad of distorted reflections of the city lights seems to be dancing below me, like they're trying to impress the few stars shining weakly in the dark lake of the sky.
'Even the waters are more agitated than me...' I silently jest, still confused by the strange calm I feel.
Pulling my phone out of my pocket like I just remembered its existence, I wait a moment for the screen to brighten. I don't even remember turning it off.
As soon as I'm done entering the SIM PIN, I get bombarded by notifications :
[Phone - 38 missed calls]
[Messages - 52 new messages]
[Wazzapp - 129 new messages]
[Ninjagram - 33 direct messages]
[Smilechat - 59 notifications]
And so on. I decide to skim through some of them, just for a laugh.
[Jill Yung : Yo is that you on the news ??]
[Jackerson : could have shared with the bros…]
[Michael Pawn : thanks for the extra work dumbass]
[Arthur Park : My cousin's girlfriend is a lawyer, hmu if you need one]
[Sam Daeshin : pleaaase give my money back before trial !!!]
[WeLord ToF DevTeam : You have been removed from the group.]
[Sayemi : just why ???]
[@m1n_eui : Pathetic.]
[@onlyyysvn : talk about game addiction am i right xD]
[@aconit_vvolfsbane : You played, you lost]
As I read all this with an amused smirk, my phone starts vibrating. A call from a new number. I let it ring, staring into space. Then, sighing loudly, I throw my phone into the river.
That's stupid, but incredibly relieving.
Next I take my yellow tinted glasses off and let them join the water as well.
Finally, fighting the wind with all the strength I have left, I climb the parapet.
'If I survive this, I'll fight my way through whatever is coming next.'
'If I find my phone, I'll get revenge on the bastards that betrayed me.'
'If I find my glasses, I'll keep working in development no matter what.'
'If I find both, I swear I will make the world remember my name.'
However, before I can even think of taking the decisive step, a bright white flash of light abruptly blazes through the entirety of the sky, reverberating on the water.
Instantly stunned and blinded, I stumble dangerously on the fence and barely manage to shift my weight towards the back to fall safely on the bridge.
For a solid minute, nothing moves and the surroundings stay lit just as in the middle of the day. But somehow, this is not even the most captivating thing to happen tonight.
Instead, my eyes are irresistibly attracted to what I can only describe as a giant dark red message box floating in the sky, displaying a horrifying omen.
[[[ TRANSITION PROCESS INITIATED : ARMAGEDDON ]]]