"Okay, s-so I thought Kiola would y-y'know... Do a normal TTRPG, b-but it seems like she doesn't understand the rules..." Senshi awkwardly twiddled her many legs as she loomed over the Game Master Screen, staring down at her shrunken friends who were dressed in rather fashionable fantasy wear.
Recently, Kiola had found out about a game from Pandora's Tears called 'Cells and Scales', and since Cyel wasn't there to explain how to actually play this sort of game, Kiola took the initiative to make up her own rules, with Senshi as the groups 'Warden'.
The first thing that went wrong that night was Lucy commenting how 'childish it was' and "why do we have to wear this ridiculous clothing". That then resulted in a long back and fourth 'debate' that ended with Kiola shrinking everyone with her mist to make it more 'fun'.
"Why. Why do I agree to these things?" Lucy groaned as she scratched at the novelty elf ears was forced to wear. Vinea couldn't help but laugh at the warden's easy frustration over a game. Even though he was given a bow and arrow, despite the fact he had no fingers.
"Hey, be grateful you're not the pet." Avis complained. She had been designated as the group's mascot character and had been forced into a rather cramped caged with only a flimsy rag. "What? I thought that's how these things go?" Kiola huffed, leaning down to the cage.
"They don't usually have A WOMAN TRAPPED IN A CAGE! I'M TOO OLD TO BE DOING THIS! I'm in my thirties for crying out loud..."
"Forties. You're in your Forties." Vinea cheekily chimed in. "Why... Do I have to be the mount..." Nvr complained. She and Grey had been forced to pull a carriage poorly made of sticks. "Well, duh? You've got the pully thingies that are on horses." Kiola said in a matter of fact tone.
"You mean a rein?" The demon questioned as she struggled to move in her tight fitting dress, tripping over a left out 20 sided die. Senshi could have just sat there and watched the five bicker all night, but it would have probably been best to start.
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Putting on her best mystical voice, Senshi began setting the scene.
"You are noble adventurers (along with your noble bio weapon) who were searching for the mystical amulet of uh... Bugicite. But you were shrunken down by the evil and charmingly beautiful Demon, Arachhina Spinia!"
The centipede quickly ducked behind the screen to play a menacing violin string before continuing.
"She has captured you and placed you in a cage in her lair. You now need to escape her clutches or face certain death! How do you proceed?"
The group stood on the paper map, with each of them taking up a square each (well, Kiola and Nvr taking up 2). Lucy was the first to try something. "I use my chains and rip the bars off like I normally would."
Senshi let out an exacerbated sigh, having explained this rule hundreds of times before. "Lucy, you're a l-level three sorcerer, you can't do that."
"But I do it all the time? Why can I not do it in the game?"
"Because it's A GAME." The Centipede snapped back. It had taken about three hours just to make everyone's characters and two of them were spent telling Lucy that she can't be herself.
Avis was the next to speak up. "I ask if Vinea can let me out of this cage."
"I do not." The vined king answered back with a smirk, rattling the harpy's confinement with his vines. "Ooo, Ooo! I wanna try something!" Kiola called out, her little wings flapping excitedly. Senshi tried her best to hold a smile as Kiola explained her plan.
"Okay, I wanna punch the bars open!"
"Finally, something you can actually do. Yes, go ahead and roll-" Before Senshi could hand the dice over, Kiola ran over to the game screen and punched a small hole in the cardboard with a cocky look on her face.
"Did we escape?"
"Are you serious!? I-I can't get another one of these... It was limited edition..." The centipede grumbled as she ducked back behind the screen with another long sigh. It was amazing how none of them could comprehend even the most basic of rules.
"Can I have a go?"
"Sure, whatever."
It only took Nvr a second to think of a solution. "How big are the bars?"
"Role f-for perception." The centipede handed over a twenty sided die that was around the size of Nvr's own body. The bio-weapon effortlessly picked it up and rolled it like a bowling ball, landing it on 15.
"You notice that the Demon had failed to account for how small you would be, all of you could easily fit through the bars."
"Huh. Neat." Vinea laughed.
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"The interior of the Demon's lair is rather homely. Everything has a cute coloring and bright lights. It doesn't seem like somewhere a Demon would live."
Lucy let out a long sigh. She was already bored of this game, seeing as it had a lack of either actual demonic items and chains. "Can I just shout for the witch to face us?"
"Uh... it's not advised but-"
"Arachne, come here!" The demon yelled out, causing the former spider idol quickly scoot over the edge of the game screen in a rather skimpy witch outfit that left the demon somewhat embarrassed.
"Why... Why is she wearing that?"
"I-I don't see what you mean..." The Centipede awkwardly laughed, looking over her partner with a sheepish gaze. Lucy already knew that Arachne had actual outfits that would resemble a witch, thanks to the spider's idol work.
But this outfit was clearly for more... What's the word?
"Oh Mother's name, her undergarments are see-through!" The Demon yelled, making the others stare directly up. At their current size, they could all see up the idol's clothes. Arachne swiftly pulled her outfit down in embarrassment, muttering rather loudly.
"I told you this outfit wouldn't work!"
"Hey, it's n-not my fault you b-brought private one o-out! I-I wanted the the high fantasy one, b-but you were all like 'nooooo, Senshipede. I don't l-like that one, it makes me look fat'. You're a spider! You have no body fat to speak of!"
"Are they really fighting right now?" Avis whispered. "Yeah... I think that's one of their 'bug sex' outfits." Vinea whispered back with a snicker. "Oh Mother, stop talking about sexual relations between two consenting adults... Who clearly need to plan things better." Lucy added.
"Huh... So is that what women look like down there?" Kiola asked with a curious look, confusion everyone else. "W-What?" Avis looked completely baffled by the question as Senshi and Arachne continued to argue.
"What? I don't really see other species uh... Y'know. I mean, I figured they just had bothum."
"As much as I shouldn't entertain this, what do you mean 'bothum'? I thought you were female?" Lucy said with a reluctant sigh.
Kiola now seemed more confused. "Wait, you guys don't have both?"
"D... Do you have both?" Vinea was now just as interested in this as the rest.
"I have nothing." Nvr added with seemingly flat tone.
"Then... What gender are you?" The Demon was actually getting invested in this conversation more then she initially realised. "Uh, dragon?"
"Dragon isn't a gender." The demon sighed. "Then... The same as you? I dunno, I just wanted to play a game, not talk about gender identity!" Kiola grumbled, kicking the die with a huff of mist as Senshi and Arachne continued to argue over the outfit.
"Fine... Though i think this game is all but finished." The demon sighed, quickly turning around as the lovers began to make up in there usual way just behind the game screen. "Make us big, MAKE US BIG!" Avis and Vinea yelled in a panic as it became quite clear what was happening just behind that screen.
"This was fun... I think?"