I couldn't believe what was happening. The feeling was the same as the one I experienced 28 years ago when I was born...
Fearing the worst but hoping for the best, I opened my eyes, and what met me was ... My baby body. Yeah, I became a baby again, even after everything.
'No ... it can't be.'
I was trying to think of a reason why this could have happened, but nothing made sense.
'Did I do something wrong, that's why I went back in time?'
'But why now, and not before?'
So many things came into my mind, thinking about why it might have happened that I was almost going mad since I had lost not only my loved ones, Liara, Tali, and Shepard, but also my whole life, 28 years that I had battled like crazy, meant nothing.
Depression took hold of me for a while, thinking only about the bad things that I had lost.
Which was a lot. But, I knew only thinking about the bad of a situation only led to despair, so I tried to look from another perspective. Soon after, I regained a little bit of my composure, thinking about the 'good' of this situation.
'Now that I know the future in more detail, I can change some things. No, a lot of things...!'
While I changed I few things from the plot last time and saved some that were supposed to die, I also didn't like how a few things turned out, so I didn't mind fixing that. Mainly saving those who died in the last battle.
There were also other things, but that was the worst part.
But that meant I would have to relive all that, all the pain and suffering. It wasn't/wouldn't be a nice feeling, but I had no choice but to accept it.
Anyway, while the depression went away for a moment, the feeling of irritation with this situation still remained, and that soon turned into anger.
'Why me? Why that moment?! I lived my whole life preparing for the Reapers invasion, training from morning until morning, only for this to happen! WHY!'
To be honest, this second life of mine was nothing but hard work. I started from the bottom and made my way up, only for it to mean nothing, as I just returned to when I was a baby.
The anger continued to grow, and, as I was just born, I literally had no way to express this anger. So I cried my lungs out. Not out of sadness, but out of anger.
But, in the middle of that, I started to formulate a plan to use what I now know about the future.
' If I use this correctly, I can become more rich than anyone on Earth.'
While I knew the plot of the game before, that was it. But now, I know much more. I still had the knowledge I acquired before, the training and study I did with Wrex, Tali, Garus, Mordin, etc. I could and will use that in my favor.
Also, thank God I was a fan of sports. In between the battles, I watched a lot of it and remember which team would be champions, etc.
If I used what I knew from those things, I could speed up the process of becoming rich.
'... Let's focus on living again. I will see it through once more and reunite with my loved ones.'
'But, will they be my loved ones, the people I feel in love with, or another person altogether?'
Those thoughts came in a hurry but I pushed it away.
' No, I can't let those tough times cloud my judgment. I will make a plan and follow it through until the end.'
With a heavy heart and the sensation that things would not end the way I wanted, I tacked life once more, from the beginning.
YEARS LATER
I am now rich. This time, however, other than using my future knowledge to become rich, I also made some connections before leaving the area. I met the boss of the slums where I lived and asked for him to take care of my house, as it had sentimental value to me.
He agreed after I paid him well. He was a nice (?) guy, that was what my gut told me, but I would never know that because I, along with my mom, moved from that area soon after that.
Well, I forced her to come with me, as I didn't want her to stay there. She wanted to stay in the house where I grew up, so I made a compromise to maintain the house, make some renovations, and let her go there once in a while.
With my newfound money, I managed to put a lot of things in motion, so I managed to meet Sheppard a lot sooner, even before she became a Specter. Of course, I changed a few things here and there.
For one, I didn't enter a mercenary group or create one. I tried this in my last cycle, but to be honest, it was a hassle taking care of the logistics. However, I had plans to make one, but not for now, and maybe not even in the future.
So, meeting with Shepard was good, but soon I realized something that made me depressed for a long while. While it was Shepard, it wasn't 'my' Shepard. That made me feel a lot of rage, anger, and sadness. The feelings combined and put my mood in a downward spiral.
Of course, I also realized after that the new Tali and Liara weren't the ones I was with in my last cycle. Even the rest of the crew weren't the ones I bounded with.
It took a long time, but I had no choice but to accept the fact that I would never meet them again. But I found peace with the fact that, while not the one I had, they still existed.
Even better, now I have more time to spend with them. Well, at least Shepard for now. The other two and the rest of the crew will have to wait a little while longer.
After that, I entered into a relationship with Shepard while she was still with the Alliance. Nothing much changed, but I helped her with her mission, the same one that made her lose her entire squad in the game. I helped her kill the Thresher Maw and save her squad.
I did that because I decided to change a few things because my gut was telling me that it wouldn't be the first time I went back in time. Of course, I hoped, with all my being, that wasn't true, but it was a feeling I couldn't shake off.
Like it was part of my soul or something along those lines.
' What if nothing I did mattered once more? How could I live like that?'
Eventually, things changed a little, but not much. After years of proving herself, with me helping for some time, Shepard was nominated as the first human specter.
The plot of the game followed almost the same, but this time, after she gathered the crew, I approached Wrex, to resume my training.
In the last cycle, he taught me the basics and I mastered it, but now I will ask for more. I wanted to become a force no one could stop, and there was no better teacher than Wrex in that regard.
Of course, I was still a good soldier, but that was it. If a few hundred husks, who were something the Reapers can make (they use the species within the galaxy to make troop soldiers, corrupting them to a point of no return), attacked me at the same time, I would be dead, as at the end of the day, I was just a human.
No biotics or cheating, just me.
Anyway, as I knew now more than what I knew about him in the games, I came prepared. I already took his ancestor's armor and tried to make a deal with the Krogan.
'' So, let's get this straight, you want me, a warlock Krogan, to teach you, a human, to fight out the Krogan way?''
What I loved about Wrex was that he treated everyone the same way, so there was no discrimination from him.
He hated everyone the same way.
He was also one of my best buddies last cycle, and I wanted to continue that way in this new one.
'' Yes.''
'' Why would I do that?''
While I knew the krogan, I still had to be cautious of him, as we weren't even friends in this cycle yet. Only acquitances.
I put his ancestor's armor in front of him, '' Because I have this. And because I asked nicely?''
When he saw the armor, Wrex's facial expression changed a little. He took the armor and inspected it for a while, then looked at me and said, ''This is my ancestor's armor. How do you have this?''
I ignored the threatening sound he made in between his talk and explained the situation to him.
''I found the armor, took it with me, appraised it, and somehow it was your ancestor. Coincidence, no?''
I bullshited him a little as I knew he had no choice but to accept what I said.
After doing that, I extended my hand and said,'' So, do we have a deal?''
Wrex hesitated only for a moment. 'The deal is too good for me. I just have to 'train' this human for some time in exchange for something I've been looking for for years.'
'' Deal.''
WREX POV
What Wrex did not expect was that in less than a day, he would be surprised. Extremely surprised.
' It's almost like this human already knows the basics of how to fight like Krogans. It's really amazing.'
First, Wrex just wanted to repay the human for the armor, so he went easy. But soon, he noticed that his easy training was really easy for the human in front of him.
It tickled his pride a little, so he ramped up the intensity of the training to the point where even a normal Krogan would not be able to keep it up.
But the human did it. Not only that, he was learning at a fast pace, like he was a sponge.
Of course, as the bodies of a human and a Krogan were different, the teaching he could do was limited to some extent, but now Wrex was interested to see how far this human could push himself.
'If he continues like this, he could be a force to be recognized.'
Wrex was now interested in how far he could go, so he was going to teach the human everything he knew, and maybe more.
' Let's see if you can keep it up.'
NORMAL POV
Time passed, and Wrex was amazed once more. He looked at the human towering over him, and then at the hand extended at him.
'' Come on, Wrex. Get up.''
Yes, Wrex just lost a sparring match against the human. It was only two years after the training started, but now the number of times they had won against each other was almost identical.
Wex accepted the help and got up. He looked at the human in front of him with respect and said, '' You have proved yourself far more times than I could count. If you were a Krogan, by now you would have become a warlord or in an even more powerful position.''
'' I don't mind doing the rite of passage.''
Wrex looked at the human with astonishment and said, '' You know about the ritual?''
''Yes, but I also know I can't do it alone, so I'll wait for a better time.''
Wrex started to laugh out loud. '' HAHAHAHA, no problem. I'll send you a message if a Krogan tries the ritual. But it might take a while for that to happen.''
'' No problem, I can wait.''
''... I have nothing more to teach you. You can hold yourself against almost everything the galaxy throws at you.''
Wrex taught him the best he could, and now he was on his own.
''... Thank you for your teaching.''
'' Don't mention it. Now, go make your name known across the galaxy or something like that. Maybe help Shepard more, hahaha.''
After that, I went to talk with Mordin, the salarian genius. I asked for help regarding the quarians problem about not being able to get out of their suits.
I even passed the data I had from the previous cycle, the one where we both and Tali created a pill that temporally made the Quarias not have a problem going out of their suits, with no drawbacks.
When Mordin analyzed the data, he said was willing to help me with that. He even said the research was close to the end, and the quarians would have a permanent 'cure' to their problems.
As we had already made something similar in my past cycle, things went smoothly. But, in the middle of our research, we had a breakthrough, but not in the direction we imagined. We created a more powerful medical gel.
'' We really did this?''
'' Yes, my friend. We did this.'' Mordin looked at the med gel with fascination and said, '' This is absolutely amazing. 100% more powerful than the Med Gel on the market right now, with no side effects. Amazing, yes.''
While I was ecstatic about this and memorized everything about the process of making it, we still didn't manage to hit our goal, ''But we didn't manage to help the Quarians.''
'' Yes, a shame. But we will continue our research, yes. I believe that in 5 years or so, we can find something permanent!''
I looked at the Salarian with a complicated gaze and said, 'My friend, we don't have that much time. The reapers are arriving in less than 4 years.'
'' I sure hope so.''
Time passed once more, and the Reapers attack began. Mordin died some time ago, just like in the games. He sacrificed himself to cure the genophage once more.
I could not save him this time.
But a few things are different now. Mainly, he had almost concluded the Quarian research.
I took advantage of that and memorized everything about it, including the newer Med Gel and the cure to the Genophage.
If I wanted, I could now create the cure to the Genophage on my own. But I hoped it would not need it, as it would mean I would return back on time, to when we didn't use it.
The battle against the Reapers was a bloodbath once more. This time, for some unknowable reasons, both the Leviathans, who allied with us during their creation and the Batarians, who were also an allied race, betrayed everyone.
I had managed to save everyone before the betrayal, and Shepard was already on the verge of using the crucible, but the betrayal meant my friends died.
I could not save everyone... Again.
Liara, Tali, Garus, Jack, Miranda, and Wrex are all dead.
Again...
This time Shepard chose the blue end, where she sacrificed her body and put her mind into the Reapers network, controlling them. She sent them away from the galaxy, but I doubted it would be for long. Her mind could slowly be corrupted over time, and continue in the next cycle.
But worse of all, I was alone.
In this cycle, I let the romance part out of it, deciding to focus only after the war. I still had a romantic relationship with Shepard, but we decided to start to think about our next steps after the war ended.
And now, she was dead.
Of course, I still made friends with everyone else, but the majority were dead.
Shepard, Liara, Tali... My loved ones are all dead. Even if they weren't the ones I had before, it doesn't matter. I lost them anyway.
Without Shepard to control things after the war, the survivor races immediately started attacking each other.
The Krogans, without Wrex as their leader, decided to wage war against everyone once more. The Asari, who lost their homeworld, had to interfere with the rest of the galaxy.
The Batarians, who betrayed us, were the target of everyone, and they were almost on the brink of extermination.
The Quarians and the Geth tried peace for a month or so before resuming their feud.
Humans were neutral in the whole thing, focusing more on their own survival.
Meaning, that everyone was basically on their own now, the companionship we had in the war was nowhere to be seen.
And I? I was alone on a planet near the Persian Veil. You could buy planets in this universe, and so I did it. It was one of the best planets in the galaxy because of the natural resources, and I bought it for cheap because no one knew about it.
Even I only knew about this because it was a planet with a lot of good resources in Mass Effect 2. And it had a breathable atmosphere, meaning I had no problem living there.
But, again, I was alone.
Not the life I imagined after suffering from Wrex's gruesome training and learning from Mordin. I could proudly say that I was now a master of the Krogan way and a goddamn good scientist.
But the depressing thoughts were now more powerful than ever before.
' Nothing matters anyway. I will probably go back in time again.'
This was a feeling I had had since I was born. I felt in my soul that something wasn't right, something was missing. I would return in time again.
I was incomplete in some form. I don't know how, or why, but that was my feeling.
'I do not know how to stop this.'
Worse of all, I even wanted to go back in time. My feelings were complicated right now.
I wanted to live, but not in a world where I lost almost everyone I loved. But I also didn't want to return back in time, as this would mean my instincts were correct and I was somehow trapped in a time loop.
'... But I know it's better to return in time to save everyone—to try and save everyone once more.'
I looked at the clock, and it was 23:50. 10 minutes more until I hit 28 years of age.
I started to laugh about this whole situation. Then, I cried a little.
I started to lose my sense of self. I was feeling okay-ish by the thought of losing people because I felt I knew I would somehow return in time.
And that was dangerous. But, I pushed this thought aside for the moment.
' I can fix all of this... I think.'
When the time hit 00, darkness once again consumed my vision.
That was the end of my second cycle.