"What?" Jules exclaimed, her surprise evident in her voice as she processed my words.
"I know it's sudden," I continued, my voice steady despite the nerves bubbling inside me. "But I've realized that I can't let the actions of others dictate my future. Modeling was my passion before, and I refuse to let anyone take that away from me."
Jules nodded slowly, her expression thoughtful. "I understand," she said softly, her tone filled with concern. "But... What about your phobia?"
I took a moment to gather my thoughts, knowing that my fear of cameras. The therapist had called it scopophobia. It all started after my mum died.
My mother, Jennifer Waldorf, first daughter of the prominent Waldorf family. A supermodel, owner of Lumiere Couture.
Billionaire. She was that perfect person and I wanted to be her.
One day she disappeared poof, gone and the entire fashion world felt it. Everyone wanted to know where Jennifer was, I wasn't able to go to schoolz my dad protected me but everywhere I went someone recognized me and wanted to take a picture. Paparazzi followed me, cameras everywhere and I began to fear.
The flashes. The light against my eyes. And my dad started to exclude himself from me and when he remarried and brought Aurora who wasn't scared of anything, he had seen his next supermodels his next billionaire to bring in the money and I was discarded.
Weak. Too nice. Naive. I was treated like an outcast, and my step mother knowing about my phobia would intentionally put it the flash against my face. I didn't heal, her goal was to never see me in the fashion world ever again.
And like that I became a lost prodigy, my child modeling career, gigs all went to Aurora. My life went to Aurora.
I... I can't breathe.
My chest tightened, and panic began to suffocate me. The air felt thick, suffocating, as if I were trapped in a vacuum. My heart hammered against my ribs, threatening to burst out of my chest. I tried to inhale, but my lungs refused to cooperate, as if they were filled with lead.
The world around me blurred into a chaotic haze, the sounds of chatter and laughter blending into an overwhelming cacophony.
All I could see was those flashed.
It was as if I was in 2005 again…
'Miss stark any news from your mother?'
'miss stark talk to the camera'
'Are you going to be the next queen of the fashion world?'
'Did your mother disappear because she had enough of your clinginess?'
The question. The flashes. The faces.
I struggled to focus, to ground myself in the present moment, but the fear consumed me like a voracious beast. It clawed at my mind, gnawing away at my sanity.
And then, just as I felt myself teetering on the edge of oblivion, a gentle hand landed on my back, grounding me in reality. It was Jules.
"Breathe," she urged softly, her voice cutting through the chaos like a beacon of light in the darkness.
I forced myself to obey, drawing in a shaky breath as if it were my last. Slowly, the world began to regain its shape, the noise receding into the background like a distant echo.
"I shouldn't have mentioned this," Jules murmured, her concern palpable.
I forced a smile. "It's fine. I will get over it. I will train myself, but first I need to know if you would be my manager? I know that Aurora had made you jobless after Anya died."
"She is jealous. Because I won't manager her," she replied using her chopstick to pick up some meat.
"And…I believe it's because you are my friend."
"She can go fuck herself," we both laughed at that.
After a moment of silence, Jules broke the tension. "I would love to be your manager," she said earnestly. "But first... I would need to hand in my resignation letter because I know for sure Aurora would never let you in Lumiere Couture."
I nodded in understanding. "True," I admitted, acknowledging the reality of the situation. My mind raced with possibilities, trying to devise a plan to overcome this obstacle.
Thoughts of Zayn crept into my mind, his enigmatic presence looming large in my thoughts. "I'll definitely think of something," I assured Jules, determined to find a solution to our predicament.
Jules smiled wistfully, a hint of nostalgia in her eyes. "It'll be like old times again," she remarked, her voice tinged with fondness. "2004, young toddlers and their dreams to be like their mothers."
Before I could reply, my phone rang, interrupting our conversation. Glancing at the caller ID, my stomach sank as I recognized the name flashing on the screen.
Joshua Stark, originally my lovely dad but, he was an embarrassment.
What does he want now?
Steeling myself I picked up the phone.
"Yes…"
"Come to the mansion. Now!"
He hung up. Rude