Well, I got what I wanted…
The steam from the hot water was still filling the room. It was just thick enough that I hoped Vim couldn't really see the blushing on my face, or where my eyes were wandering.
Granted Vim didn't seem to care at all. He was leaning back, resting against the edge of the bath and staring up at the ceiling. The ceiling tiles were decorated, but not too special… Before those panels he had been staring at the foggy mirror nearby. Ever since we got in he's been staring at everything except me.
I'd be insulted, if not for the fact that I now understood him a little better.
It wasn't that I wasn't attractive to him… it was the simple fact that he didn't want to let himself be so. To admit it.
Such a thing was cute, in its own way.
"We built the rooms with these baths, for those who were a little different. Only for the whole city to change and become human thru and through. Now these baths are only used by those like us," Vim said as he stared upward.
Oh? Was that why these baths were so big? "When you first built this place, were the members here like that?" I asked.
He nodded. "Most of them. Time changes."
Time did change things… but something told me he wouldn't. No matter how hard time tried to change Vim, he'd be the same forever.
I shifted a little, and the splashing noises I made as I did so made me more conscious of myself. My heart thumped a little too loudly, the kind of loudly that I knew Vim could hear. Especially in this room that echoed so well.
Yet still I couldn't help but smile as I fidgeted. I was more submerged than he was. He was leaning against the side of the bath's railing in such a way that most of his upper body was exposed. I on the other hand was doing all I could to scrunch down. My shoulders were just barely above the water's surface… and that was changing quickly. The tub was still filling up. Once it finished, only my head and neck would be exposed.
Not that the water actually hid anything, of course.
"The pipes in this building probably need to be replaced soon," Vim then said.
"The pipes?"
He nodded, and with a flick of the finger he splashed and pointed to one of the spigots pouring out water.
"They're made of a type of copper… so probably will be fine for a few more decades, but I'll definitely need to get on that soon," Vim said with a sigh.
"Copper?" I asked. I couldn't help it, I shifted and crawled and swam over to the pouring water. I didn't touch it, since it was hot, but I did stare at the little spigot. There did seem to be a copper colored pipe hidden within the small designed spigot.
"Copper lasts longer than most other things. But they don't last forever, of course," Vim explained.
"Why not use your steel?" I asked.
"Steel is actually pretty good for running water. But it's extremely difficult to forge, and shape... especially in such quantities. There are miles of pipes in this building. Plus steel still has its own problems. A cheaper, easier to acquire and use metal is best for such a use," Vim said.
"Oh?" I glanced at him, and had to look away real quick. He was looking at me finally.
Smiling at myself as I sat back, a little away from the spigot… I felt silly. Why was I embarrassed? Why was I more troubled than he was? It felt kind of good to act so childish. "I thought copper was one of the lesser metals," I said.
Vim sighed as he lifted a hand to rest his head against it. "Says who?"
"Nebl. He said it was flimsy."
He smiled at me. "I see. Copper is very useful… but you need to use it correctly. Each metal has its uses, and has things that it's better at than others. Just like people," Vim said.
"Hm… what am I better at than everyone else then?" I asked him.
"Leading me astray, for one."
My ears flicked, and some water droplets made noises as they did so.
"Remember how you asked me to study this place? When we first got here?" I asked him.
He nodded. "Of course. Figured I'd ask you about it after we left," he said.
"Can I start answering now?" I asked.
Vim gestured for me to go ahead.
The water in the bath started to reach its full capacity, but it still needed a tiny bit more. I shifted a little, and tried to cross my arms in front of me a little, as to try and hide my breasts. "This place is amazing, but I can see all the problems," I said.
He stayed silent, staring at me and waiting for me to continue.
I sighed and nodded. "You have Brandy and Gerald going different directions. One wants to grow the company into something bigger, the other isn't sure what he wants to do," I explained.
"You don't believe Gerald has plans?" he asked.
His question made me doubt my own conclusion. But it was too late now to tell him otherwise. "I don't believe so. I think he just wants to keep the Society safe, and make as much money as he can without causing issues," I said.
Vim's eyes held my own, and I realized the tub was full. I reached over to turn the little knob, to stop the hot water from pouring out. As I moved, some of the water splashed out of the bath. Once I was done I leaned back to my original spot… since although the bath was big enough that Vim and I could sit apart, I had gotten a little close to his feet as to shut off the spigot.
"Why do you think Brandy wants the company to grow so much?" he asked me.
"Not sure. Maybe she's just bored? I haven't seen the vault yet, but Sofia said it's practically full. Even though you deliver a cart load of currency every so often to Telmik," I said.
"Sofia told you that?"
I nodded. As I did the water rippled. Since there wasn't any more water being poured into the bath, the water had gone a little still. The steam was still thick, at least.
"If you didn't want this place to become so… prominent, why did you build it?" I asked him.
"My wants are not what decide, Renn. You should know that by now," he said.
I nodded. I did. Yet… "Yet why not still make a choice? Why let them know you can build something like this to this level? Why not…" I shrugged, since I really wasn't sure how to phrase it.
"Who says I don't?" he asked me. Vim sighed as he shifted. As he did, it took a lot for me to not let my eyes linger downward. I kept my attention on his face as he gestured at the bathroom around us. "This is nothing. Yet… I also believe in giving our members what they want. Even if what they want is wrong. Why do you think I'm in the bath with you right now?" he finished.
"You just said you liked me," I said, a little upset with him.
"You know what I mean. I think us doing this is dangerous. In more ways than one. Yet here we are," he said.
"Love isn't dangerous, Vim," I said gently.
"It's the most dangerous thing to exist, Renn."
I shook my head, and my hair floated around. My hair was getting rather long. In-between my legs my tail twitched, floating just under the water's surface. "Maybe you think such a thing, because you don't need to fear the physical," I wondered.
"Excuse me?" he frowned at me.
I nodded. "I mean… you don't fear swords. Or spears. Or a mountain collapsing upon you. Time. Predators. Men. Knights… you don't fear pain, or death, so maybe emotions are your weakness," I explained my thoughts.
Vim smirked at me, and then scoffed and flicked some water at me. "Emotions," he said.
"Everyone has a weakness, Vim," I said.
"We do. Yes. Not to change the conversation too much, but I'd like to know what else you think of this place. Outside of Brandy and Gerald's schemes and plans," he said.
"I'll permit a small hold on that topic, for now," I said with a smile. He nodded, accepting it. "This place is wonderful, but I feel like there's some kind of… missing piece. Most of the members here seem to just be repeating the same day, again and again. Their jobs are simple. Repetitive. Yet they have no desire to do anything else," I said.
"Not everyone desires the grand adventure, Renn. In fact most of our kind have long since finished those journeys. This is their end, not their beginnings," he said.
I nodded. "I understand that. I don't know Merit's full story, but I get that feeling from her. She must have lived a wondrous life. Yet… am I wrong? Other than Brandy and Gerald, no one else is really doing anything too extravagant. They're all pieces to the puzzle, yes, and are all important. Sofia for example nearly runs the whole bank… yet she's not really trying to fill those coffers. She just wants to keep it running smoothly," I told him my thoughts.
"Every cog, no matter how small, is important," he nodded.
"Cog?" I asked.
"A part of a machine. A single piece of a whole."
"Machine…" I whispered, and wondered what he meant.
Vim waved the word away, his finger tips plunking into the bathwater as he did so. "Most of our kind doesn't desire more than a simple life, Renn. And don't tell me that you do, when you smile so beautifully while enjoying the day to day life that you've been doing. I've seen you with them," he said.
"You do stare at me a lot," I teased him.
His smirk flinched, but didn't die.
"And you're right… I'm not saying I, or anyone else, wants chaos or for life to be too eventful… I'm just saying that other than Brandy and Gerald, the rest of our people here don't seem to care if we grow as a company or not. They're just living their lives," I said.
"You mentioned you felt something was missing?" he asked.
"Yes. I feel like… well… look at these rooms? There are a lot. More than we'd ever need, I think. Why are there so many? And why do I sometimes smell scents I don't recognize from any of the other members? Also who lights the lamps and refills them? I've asked around and no one seems to know?" I asked him.
"The lamps don't use oil, Renn. And at the time of building this place, most of these rooms had been needed. A little before Gerald took over… there was a small disagreement. About half of those who had lived here left, choosing a different path than those here," Vim said.
"Oh…? Something like that actually happened?" I asked. And the lamps didn't use oil? How were they burning then?
"It did. Most of the women that were here at the time went north, to the Bell Church or past it. The rest went south. The camels especially. You'll meet them soon, unless…" Vim paused, and frowned.
"Hm?" I shifted, and wondered what he was looking at. My breasts? My stomach? It was hard to tell exactly where he was looking, thanks to the way I was kind of slouching and…
"I'm supposed to pick up a package soon. Almost forgot about it," he said as he remembered.
I let a small relieved sigh escape as I nodded. "The package for Brandy right? I thought it was still a few weeks away."
"A few days from now, I suspect," he said.
My tail twitched, splashing the surface a little.
"And you're surprisingly fit. Weren't you a little pudgier when we met?" he then asked me.
"I knew you were staring at me," I groaned.
"You're the one who wanted to bathe together! That's like giving me permission to look!" he argued.
"Well… that's true…" I grumbled. After all, I'd been staring too.
Vim smiled at me, and leaned forward a little, as if to stare at me better. I felt my ears go stiff, and I held my breath for a second as I waited for whatever he was going to say or do.
"Why a bath Renn? I thought maybe you hadn't seen it as something so personal, but look at you. All curled up, trying to hide… blushing like mad," he said. Although he had a smirk on his face, he spoke gently. Passionately. He wasn't teasing me… he was genuine in his question and with his words.
My blush deepened, and I wished the steam was thicker… but I knew he could probably see through it even if it had been. But at least if it had, I would have been able to pretend he couldn't see the blood rushing to my face.
"Well… Originally it was to see you naked," I told him the truth.
"Me? Not very impressive, huh," he said with a smirk as he leaned back.
I smiled at him and shook my head. "Not like that! I mean… I wanted to see if I could tell what you were. To see your non-human traits," I said.
"Ah…" Vim's smile softened a little, as if I had just poured a bunch of cold water into our still hot bath.
I gulped and nodded. "That was the reason originally. Then you started smirking oddly when I brought it up, and I liked that smile on your face so…"
As my voice echoed a little in our little room, I flinched as I realized how embarrassing the words I had just said were.
Jeez did I have no shame?
"And thus no traits," Vim though ignored what I had said; although I noticed the way he smiled at me. It was the smile I liked to see… which meant he knew exactly what I meant. That wasn't good. If he was able to call up that smirk on command then what hope did I have?
"It is weird Vim… Everyone has at least one. Even Brom and Reatti, as human as they are, have traits. Those black nails, for one," I said.
He nodded… but said nothing.
"Why don't you have any, Vim? You're not a human," I said.
"Who says I don't?" he asked me.
I was about to point at him, to gesture at the obvious human body he so proudly displayed before me… but…
That was true… wasn't it?
"Are you saying you do have a non-human trait?" I asked as I scanned his body again.
My eyes ran up and down him as he chuckled. "Maybe," he said.
Frowning at the way he had said it, I wondered if he was now just teasing me. "Why's it so serious a secret? You're so open about so much else," I said.
Vim's smile died a little, and he glanced to his left, to the bathroom door. It was shut firmly. Had he heard something? I tilted my ears towards the door, and the bedroom.
No. I couldn't hear anything. Not even beyond the bedroom, and out into the hallway.
"It goes back to the same thing about us, Renn," Vim said softly.
"Us? You mean…" my tail coiled a little as I understood.
He nodded. "For the same reason. The Society can't know I cherish someone… because they'll doubt my loyalty. They'll doubt my dependability. If any of them knew what I was, truly, the same thing would happen. They'd doubt me," he said.
"So… are you something that would raise doubt?" I asked.
"That's not the point. I can, could, be anything. It doesn't matter what I was… someone, one of our members, will find fault in it. Think of it from a prey's perspective. Everyone is hunted by something. If I was known as a creature, there would be other creatures out there that would doubt and hate me simply because I was that creature. By not letting anyone know… well…" he shrugged, as if it was obvious.
And obvious it was.
"Why didn't you just say that?" I asked weakly.
"It should have been obvious, Renn," he said gently.
It should have been. Yes.
I took a deep breath, inhaling the steam.
He was right. If Vim's heritage was revealed… no matter what he was. Prey or Predator… the result would be the same. There would be some who would doubt him, and others who would hate him. All because of his bloodline.
"Is that why Liina hates me?" I asked him.
"Liina doesn't hate you. She fears you. Fear is hard to overcome, Renn."
Fear? Me? "Am I scary?" I asked him.
"To some. To me, too, by the way."
Smiling at his expected answer, I nodded again. Yes. I guess so. Even if it made no sense.
"Time will either overcome that fear, Renn, or nothing will. It's instinctual. Liina and you might be able to become friends in the near future, or even a thousand years from now unable to talk to one another. It's just how it is."
"I wish it wasn't like that," I said.
"Humans are the same. In their own way," he said.
Were they? Honestly?
"Remember what I said earlier? About keeping secrets? I'll not tell anyone, you know?" I offered him a chance to tell me.
He slowly shook his head.
A little hurt, I decided it was okay. Baby steps. Small progress.
I had hundreds of years to earn him. I shouldn't expect too much at once.
Just the fact he had admitted he possibly had, or could have, emotions for me was more than enough for now.
Plus our little bath…
"One day you'll trust me more than anyone else, Vim," I told him.
Vim went still… somehow making even the water drops; falling from his finger tips from all the splashing he had been doing, not make ripples even as they fell to the water's surface.
My eyes studied the droplets that fell… somehow into the water's surface, making sound, yet seemingly invisible. As if they weren't really falling at all.
How was that possible…?
"I hope not, Renn. Because that would be the day a lot of people die," he whispered.
My hands clenched into fists beneath the water, and I was half tempted to stand up and ask what the heck that was supposed to mean… but I didn't. And not just because I would have been embarrassed to stand up before him, fully naked.
"Is that what it would take, Vim? Really?" I asked him.
He blinked, and must have realized what he had said. Had he said it without thinking?
He looked away from me… to the water. With a few moments of thought, he gestured with a half hearted shrug. "Maybe."
Maybe…
"You're a hard man to love, Vim," I said softly.
"I know," he whispered.
"Am I?" I asked him.
Vim looked back up at me and frowned. "You are. But only because of what I am. Otherwise it'd be instinctual, I think."
I gulped, and I knew I was blushing again.
He noticed, of course, and smiled at me. That smile that made me only blush even deeper.
"Careful Renn," he warned.
"Hm…?" I wasn't sure what to say to that.
"You tread a dangerous path. In fact…" He stopped talking, and frowned.
"In fact?"
Vim studied me for a moment, and then tilted his head. "Have you ever been in love before Renn?" he asked me.
Oh.
"Well… I think so," I said.
"Think so?"
"I loved Lujic and Ginny," I told him.
"The human children," he said.
I nodded.
"As a woman?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Oh. No… I think I felt like a mother. Or an older sibling, maybe," I said.
"I meant the other kind of love, Renn," he said.
"I know. I also loved Nory," I said.
He nodded. "I know you did."
"Though that isn't what you mean either, I guess…" I said.
"It's closer," he agreed.
I nodded. It had been. I had genuinely loved Nory. If she hadn't been human, but one of us… I'd likely still be with her.
"What about you?" I asked him.
"Do you really want to hear that answer?" he asked me back.
That response made me stumble, but I still gathered myself enough to nod a yes.
Vim smiled gently at me and nodded. "That's my problem Renn. I love all of our kind. Yet I hate them, all the same. But… well… I can think of a few people who I cherished. But to tell you about that, would reveal things about myself that I can't allow. Before I joined the Society… I did love someone. Or well, several someones. A family. A group. A nation. I dedicated my everything to them," he spoke softly, as if afraid to let his voice echo.
"Like you do now? With the Society?" I asked.
"Eerily similar. Hopefully the results aren't the same. Hopefully the results aren't as depressing," he said with a shrug.
Great.
"Does that mean I really don't have to compete with any women? Or at least your memories of them?" I asked him.
"There was no competition, Renn… you kind of just walked in and made yourself at home. Hardly fair, if you ask me," he said.
I grumbled at his smooth words, even though they made me so happy to hear them.
Silence followed my grumble, and for some reason… I was okay with it. So too it seemed, was Vim.
The two of us sat quietly, staring at each other. The warm water would hopefully remain so for some time, to let us both enjoy the moment.
Such a moment was precious.
It had been a hard earned moment, after all.