Chereads / A Gamer in Remnant & Multiverse / Chapter 74 - Chapter 72

Chapter 74 - Chapter 72

[|||| =LEVEL 18= ||||]

Yesss, my horrible, evil plan of giving Taylor a best friend was progressing nicely. Hopefully Irisai could charm the socks off of her. I actually doubted that the two wouldn't get along. Irisai had a powerful personality and tended to draw people in just by the virtue of being interesting in a good way.

Having my plans enacted left me a lot of free time. Worm was settled for now as Irisai had befriended Taylor and the girl herself was preparing to kill Coil. It was best to let the world stew and have her get her feet on solid ground. So, what to do? The answer was a bit obvious, having been my routine for the past few months.

Embrace the couch, my closest companion.

I lay splayed over the couch like some sort of flung rag. My hands were fiddling with a controller but even then only my fingers and thumbs were making tiny motions, everything else motionless. A game of Xcom 2 was on the screen and I was staring with half lidded eyes, wondering in the back of my mind if I should poke my nose into that world.

It seemed interesting but it also had a firm structure in its major powers. I wouldn't be able to hide the truth of where I came from. I'd have to be very cunning to avoid notice - and probably leave a few bodies or wiped minds along the way - or I'd have to be upfront with my powers and the whole God situation I had found myself in.

For the most part, though, I was just lazing about, the thoughts of manipulation and work a background process to my games.

*Bzzzzzzz* Ah, work, my old nemesis rears its ugly head.

*Bzzzzzzz*... My phone was on the side table. It was just within arms reach, but could my arms handle the strain of actually lifting up?

*Bzzzzzzz* I groaned faintly and turned to the answer to every problem. Magic. Motion affinity threw the phone in an arc onto a waiting hand and I answered it while bringing it up to my right ear.

"Please tell me it's not work," I said exasperatedly. I was in the zone. The lazy zone, that was.

"Uhhh, not really? Not now, anyways." It was Elsyria. I felt relief that whatever was going on I could trust her to accept me pushing it onto her. Unless it was an angry god level threat. Then I would have to move my lazy butt away… Or sic Esdeath on the threat. She had been antsy lately, which meant violently stabby to normal people.

"Then what's up?" I asked. I noticed that my words drawled a little naturally.

"I got an invitation from Yasaka. There's a, uh… ball coming up, or something like it, between the three factions, the yokai, and a few other factions the day after tomorrow. It's not really formal but there will be some dancing and socializing. She wants you to come so she can have legitimacy as she announces the cult as allied to the Yokai."

"... Can I avoid this?" I asked bluntly. Socializing and politicking sounded terrible.

"You signed up to be Yasaka's ally. You have to make some allowances. Technically I could go in your stead, but you're widely known. I just have your blessing as approval and-"

"I'll go," I interrupted her, my brain aching from higher thought processes. But I had an ace up my sleeve. "Can I bring a plus one?"

"You're Yasaka's plus one."

"It's invitation only?"

"Sadly. You wanted to bring Esdeath and push all the work onto her?"

"You know me so well," I drawled, even though I was sobbing inside at the upcoming effort. I could probably just walk in with Esdeath but that would be a bit rude. I had made a poor first impression at the three factions meeting almost a year ago. I didn't want to make people think I was an asshole.

Come to think of it, Esdeath in a stabby mood and politics was a bad combination. Maybe Kuroka? She was wanted by the devils, though. That would be a power play against them in a fashion. I didn't want to start something… Work was unavoidable sometimes.

"I'll be there. Where is it?"

"You can meet up at Yasaka's residence. She'll have a hired magician make a two way teleporter between her house and the manor the party is taking place in."

"Fine. And where's her place?"

"Just go to Kyoto and follow the leylines to their intersection. Her palace is built right in the middle of ten of them. You can't miss it. I'll send you her number to meet up." I nodded, not that she could see me do so.

"I'll be there."

[|||| =-= ||||]

I was dressed up a little. I had a dark purple dress shirt and dress pants on, but nothing else. I had the rest of the outfit in my soul space but I never liked suits.

Kyoto was easy to find and the leylines were, while a bit more subtle than the magic I normally dealt with, obvious to follow once you noticed one. They were like magical currents, ways that mana flowed. It was like looking at dust, the dirt kind, seemingly static at first but if you looked closely you could see how it all moved in the same direction as the air flowed. I just wondered what made leylines possible in the first place. Not that it mattered too much to me.

The palace in-between all those ley lines, though? Now THAT was impressive. It was huge, at least three times the size of the White House and right in the middle of Kyoto, not to mention that it was absolutely drenched in magic. Runes and strange barriers covered the traditional Japanese… shrine? Yasaka was a priestess as well as a leader so I assumed that it was a shrine, though it might as well have been a fortress. I decided to call it a palace and leave it at that.

I approached the manor on foot just so I didn't startle anyone or set off the palace's defenses. At an entrance at the side two semicircular wooden doors stood shut guarded by a fox yokai, kitsune I think they're called, absorbed in a playboy magazine. He wore a blue uniform, looking somewhat like a bellboy, though his cap had two holes cut into it for his fox ears to peek out of. I didn't see the point in it and thought he looked a little ridiculous.

"Scuse me," I said in Japanese as I approached the booth. He glanced up and then flailed, throwing the magazine aside with wide eyes. Somehow he got his hands on his lap and plastered a smile onto his face, pearly white teeth (just a little too pointed for a human) shining with fake cheer.

"Hello, Lord, uh, um -Mavros!" he said, his smile growing strained as he momentarily forgot my name.

"Nice to see you working hard." I smirked. He glanced down at the floor out of my sight and I glimpsed an orange tail move and heard something slide across the ground.

"A pleasure to know my work is appreciated, Lord!" He was dying of embarrassment inside. I could tell. "Are you here to meet Yasaka-sama?"

"I'm accompanying her to the meeting later tonight," I said simply. The man nodded.

"There have been rumors that you and Yasaka-sama were associates. I'm glad to know that our faction can depend on somebody as powerful as you, Mavros-senpai!" What… what the hell? The guy was beaming up at me and I felt the most uncomfortable urge to hug him. Completely creeped out by the weird feeling I smiled a little awkwardly back.

"Thank you, er," I observed the man, "Nichi-kun." I hoped I got the honorific right - kun was used for juniors, right? - and the man looked like I had touched his heart. "I'm truly sorry to move on but could you please open the gate? I don't want to keep Yasaka waiting." They man - no, the boy's eyes widened in awe.

"I didn't know you and Yasaka-sama were so close," he whispered. Shit! I hadn't used an honorific that time! "It's truly an honor to be the kouhai of somebody so esteemed!" He stood up from his chair, pushing it back a little, and bowed to me. I looked over his aura and did a mostly non-invasive look with my mind affinity. The boy was completely genuine in this thanks. He wasn't trying to flatter me at all. He was just that… innocent.

"You honor me. Thank you, Nichi-kun," I said patiently. He looked up and smiled at me before pushing a button in the booth. The doors opened and I smiled kindly once more before entering and my smile dropped as I felt confused by whatever I had just done.

Maybe that kid was just that weirdly honest and nice by default. I'd only ever seen that kind of innocence in Ruby…

I pushed that thought away before I started brooding again and went to the side to get out of the way, though there wasn't anybody around as far as I could tell. I leaned against the wall I had just crossed and brought out my phone to text Yasaka.

'I'm at your place. Should I meet you in the tower or…?'

She didn't reply immediately so I started up one of the mobile games I had while waiting for a reply.

'Sorry! I got distracted bathing. I'll be ready in ten. I'm in the big building.' Attached was a picture of her almost naked, a towel barely covering her chest looking sheepishly but still sexily at the phone she was holding. I was a bit interested in the picture but I was more interested in how her tails were frozen swaying behind her. Apparently they needed blow drying and had gotten all poofy. Oh, and she might have been hitting on me, but that was something to think about later. Much later.

'Nice tails,' I sent her. I chuckled when she sent twenty different emojis in distress and frustration. Flirtations dodged. Good job, me.

I made my way to the largest tower and waved at a group of female kitsune who were sitting near a small pond, several of them dipping their feet in the clear water. They were giggling among themselves when I arrived and I was sure that they were going to gossip about me as I left.

I met two more kitsune, male again, guarding the doors to the main building. They stood a little straighter when they saw me and opened the doors in sync. I nodded to the two of them and one of them puffed out his chest a bit. They closed with a mighty boom behind me.

The hall I was in was large and square, lit only by incense and a few candles, and smelled strongly of both, too strongly for me really. It was clearly a shrine judging by the golden statue of Ameratsu in the middle of it, the lady looked statuesque with ebony hair in a bun behind her, looking kindly yet imperiously down upon the whole hall.

Right in front of it was a young girl sitting seiza style in miko robes staring at me. Nine golden fox tails waved behind her slowly, looking regal despite her age.

"Welcome to our abode, Mavros-sama. I am Kunou, daughter of Yasaka. It is a pleasure to have you." She stood in some sort of stilted shoes, something traditionally Japanese I was pretty sure, and bowed shortly before standing formally with her hands in front of her. "Please, follow me." She turned and walked off to the side, where two curtains draped to the floor, blending in well with the dark walls. I followed but already felt underdressed and I hadn't even made it to the party yet.

"Yasaka never mentioned that she had a daughter." I tried to strike up a conversation while Kunou and I climbed staircases, each of the levels being similar shrines to various shinto gods and goddesses.

"I'm not of age to take on responsibilities yet. I'm still being schooled," she stated formally. I almost sighed, feeling not only underdressed now but also outclassed… by a damned elementary schooler. I checked with observe to make sure that kitsune didn't age slower than humans and saw that she was nine years old. It was another blow to my ego.

"You don't seem happy about that," I picked up by reading her aura. Kunou's lips tightened.

"I feel that as the heiress to the high priestess of Ameratsu I should be allowed to represent my mother at times. She disagrees with me."

"You're about nine years old, right? When I was nine I was taking care of my sister and learning, not taking positions as a state official. It's admirable that you're so dedicated to helping your mother but she isn't going anywhere and neither is the position of high priestess."

"But I'm ready now!" she protested before immediately blushing and hiding her face under a long sleeve with a polite cough. "My apologies. My tongue got the best of me." I cracked a smile knowing that she was still a kid. Also, my ego had recovered a bit at her breaking formalities.

"It happens to the best of us," I replied. Then the many staircases we had climbed stopped with a wooden door at the top of the flight. Kunou fished out a key from her waist and unlocked the door before opening it and standing aside, gesturing for me to come inside.

The home was surprisingly humble, but it showed wealth too. It was fancy, having a leather couch and a table that was clearly a Japanese antique, but it also had a kotatsu, a plasma TV, and a scattering of DVDs under the TV.

"… Gravity Falls? They have a box edition?" I asked, looking at the DVDs.

"I don't - wait, you…" Kunou trailed off, diverting from her formal tone in confusion.

"I liked the mysteries but, personally, Pacifica was my favorite character. I wish they had developed her more. It's a shame that they're not making a season two but it's good that they didn't drag it out. Too many good shows have been messed up by a second season ruining all the work people did before them."

"… Grunkle Stan's my favorite," she mumbled with a faint blush. I smiled and internally cheered at breaking through Kunou's shell.

"You like movies too?" She nodded. I waved my hand through the air with a cheesy grin. Unrealistically large snowflakes drifted through the air, glowing faintly with magic. "Do you wanna build a snowman~?"

I received a tiny fireball to the face, not even enough to hurt a normal person much less me. I laughed and waved it off.

"I never even saw that movie!"

When Yasaka came out to find us we were sorting through the DVDs Kunou had and chatting about what we had watched, a snowman with a fist-shaped hole through it's face next to the stack. She watched a lot of Disney but hated princess movies, citing how all the princesses tended to act girly and always had a happy ending. She preferred the shows about 'normal' people like Zack and Cody or Hannah Montana back when those were still running. I, on the other hand, liked cartoons, of which she had only cherry picked the best ones to watch.

She somehow didn't know what Courage the Cowardly Dog was, the uncultured vixen. I had just mentioned Chowder and she told me that she didn't know that either when Yasaka walked in, a sleeveless kimono on her once more like the one she had met me in, though this one had a black and orange color pattern instead of just orange, the two colors spiraling down her long sleeves.

"Sorry, sorry, I didn't mean to take so long, I just… " she trailed off as she noticed that neither Kunou or myself were paying attention.

"-But creeeepy stuff happens in Nowhere! It's up to Courage to save them all!"

"Stupid dog! You made me look bad!" Kunou giggled as the intro to the show ended on my phone.

"It looks kinda freaky," she said, smiling. "And what's with the hole in his teeth?"

"I don't know," I shrugged. "Most of the show is just watching Courage freak out over whatever abomination he has to fight in the episode."

"Can we see the Chowder intro?" I looked behind us at Yasaka, who was blushing for some reason.

"Well your mother's here so I think I have to go now." Her eyes widened.

"Oh, nononono! We've got a minute!" Kunou looked between my phone and her mother hesitantly.

"No, you don't want to be late to the ball. You should go," she decided for us. Yasaka pouted and I pocketed my phone, turning it on silent for the ball.

"Well it's been a pleasure to meet you, Kunou-hime," I said to her, putting my hand down for her to shake. She smiled and looked up at me happily, her tails waving like a happy puppy's.

"It's been an honor, Mavros-sama," she said solemnly, a grave look on her face. Her tails' movement ruined the facade but she didn't realize it or didn't acknowledge it. I certainly wasn't going to correct her on that. Despite still being underdressed I felt a lot better about meeting Kunou now.

I winced as a thump and yelp alerted us. I looked to see Yasaka holding a tail and looking at one of the walls, the blush larger on her face. "Nothing. Sorry," she said to us. "Haven't done that in years," I heard her mutter under her breath. I waved to Kunou and she waved back as Yasaka and I walked away through a different door. We entered a brightly lit room with a few runes along the walls and a crystal standing upwards in the center of the room.

"So, you never told me that you were good with kids," she said conversationally.

"I don't think I am. I just treated her like I used to treat my sister. All I had to do was humor her maturity and treat her a bit seriously. Too many people think kids are stupid for some reason. I never got it."

"Kunou's very smart. I just wish she didn't want to grow up so fast." Yasaka gave a wistful sigh at that.

"She talked about being a government official of some sort, taking on a position as a priestess I think. Is that what you're talking about?" Yasaka was about to answer when the crystal in the room glowed red. She tapped it and a demonic magic circle appeared around us. Our surroundings warped and the room changed to one with a brick wall and a hooded man standing against the wall. He bowed his head and Yasaka gave him no notice as she left so I followed her.

"She wants to be a priestess just like me." She laughed lightly. "But people wouldn't listen to her. She's just too young. So I keep denying her and feel terrible each time and she keeps pushing."

"A position would be bad for her," I agreed. "But what about giving her responsibility?" I looked around as we walked down a fancy corridor. A mural with devils, angels, and fallen angels fighting decorated the wall we were facing while rooms took the other wall. The two of us were walking towards the end of the hall where a door stood waiting.

"Hm? Like what?"

"Kunou wants something to take care of and feel like she's helping out. Being a kid of course she's not going to want to clean the house or something,so why not get a pet? It would distract her, make her feel like she's doing something, and… let me guess, she's an only child?"

"Yes, and she doesn't have too many friends either. It worries me sometimes." Yasaka sure sounded concerned, conveying it as much through her voice as her words seemingly without trying. It was a sort of charisma I had never seen before. I could never put so many thoughts into a tone like she was. She opened the door and stepped into a garden filled with people holding drinks chatting. They glanced at us and gazes immediately locked onto me, though the conversation kept a steady rhythm. I still felt like the center of attention.

"She could be lonely. A lot of only children are like that. I noticed that your home was a bit quiet and you must be busy a lot of the time. Kunou just seemed happy to have somebody to talk to, at least I got that impression."

"I've… never really noticed. I always got distracted from her asking me about responsibilities that I guess…" She looked a bit troubled and I was about to reassure her when we were interrupted.

"Yasaka-san!" A cheerful voice came not far from us and I saw Sirzechs 'Fucking' Lucifer walking calmly towards us, a beaming smile on his face. I glimpsed at his power, something I hadn't focused on the last time we met, and shivered a little. Based on power alone we were pretty close; I had more varied affinities but he had one massive affinity in destruction. His aura, despite being deactivated, was still oddly controlled, whether through magical control or serious self discipline I couldn't say. Maybe both.

"Ah, Sirzechs! Please, drop the honorifics. We're in hell, not Japan." Yasaka smiled diplomatically, her previous distress melting away under politeness. I noticed that some people were openly watching the three of us now, though most pretended that they weren't noticing everything we said or did.

"If it makes you comfortable," he shrugged, still smiling. "Just dropping by to see what you and your, ah, I'm sorry, I'm not entirely sure of your relationship with each other." He looked between me and Yasaka, expectant at the flimsy excuse to be introduced to me. He couldn't just accuse me of almost hurting his family and disrupting the three factions meeting now, could he? That would be rude. Fucking politics.

"This is Abyss Mavros, an ally of the Yokai and god of…" Yasaka trailed off and blushed once again.

"Void. I recall," he said. I sensed a little anger veiled underneath his voice. Still, his smile was impeccable. He held out a hand to me. "Sirzechs Lucifer; Satan."

"Contrary to our first introduction I'd rather be friends," I said as I shook hands with literally Satan. All I got from Sirzechs was a blink of surprise and a slight narrowing a moment after.

"You have an interesting way of making friends," he said.

"I didn't have full control over my powers back when we first met. I was only aiming for Vali, not any of yours or your family. I'm sorry." I bowed my head to him briefly. He was silent for a second.

"You're forgiven," he decided. His tone was much warmer. "Sorry if I was a bit rough approaching you."

"It's perfectly fine. I'd feel threatened if my enemies showed up to a party of mine. I'd have the exact same response, though I might have employed a few more threats." He laughed politely at that, though I wasn't trying to make a joke. He seemed to realize this a moment later and his laugh turned to a cough.

"Well, I hope you have a nice time at the party," he leaned in closer. "And between us, if I could get away with it I'd do some threatening myself." I snickered in response and we shared a look before he left to socialize somewhere else. The people not so indiscreetly watching us returned to their normal conversations then, the drama apparently over.

"You handled that well," Yasaka said approvingly. I looked to see her smiling at me. "Elsyria said you might need some nudges to politic properly but it looks like you made amends quickly."

"I didn't act like a jerk and apologized. I screwed up when we first met. I'm not going to shy away from that." Yasaka nodded.

"Most would refuse to bow their head with power like yours."

"I control my power. It doesn't control me. If I respect a guy like Sirzechs I'll bow my head. My power has nothing to do with it." She looked even more approving at that, a smile edging at the corners of her mouth. A butler stopped by with drinks and I took a blue one and sipped it. Blueberry. Nice.

"So wise for somebody so young." She sipped an amber drink and started walking in no particular direction. I walked alongside her, just looking around.

"Twentyish by now, I think. Maybe more like nineteen." She blinked.

"You don't know your exact age?"

"I've traveled worlds more than a few times. It's… October here? Back home it'd be March." Yasaka looked interested in that.

"Other worlds?"

"That's a whole different topic for another time."

"And that time is now!" A familiar voice called. I turned to see Azazel striding up to me with a smile on his face. "Hey, buddy! Remember me?"

Then he reached me and with a small shockwave in the air his fist smashed into my face. I held off my aura and stumbled backwards, feeling for a broken nose. It was broken, not that it actually hurt with my body made of living metal. I let it be. The room was dead silent.

"Ow," I grunted.

"Azazel what the FUCK?!" Yasaka sounded furious.

"I deserved that one, actually," I said.

"Oh you deserve a lot more than that. Also, owwwww…" Azazel shifted from scolding to whining and holding his slightly bruised hand in an instant.

"I gave you a nice thing to study!"

"Yeah, right, I didn't get a chance! You didn't give me enough time!"

"I trusted you with a part of my dead mother's soul!"

"Fuck your mother!"

My fist slammed into his face this time, the crunch of bone accompanying it. The fallen angel braced a foot behind himself and grunted. His hand came up to his broken cheekbone and a green light shined.

"Okay, okay… I deserved that. I went too far," he apologized. "I'm sorry."

"Don't insult me or any of my family again," I waved my hand over my face and metal affinity flexed, flowing my nose back into shape. "But I get where you're coming from."

"Hmph… fine. I heard you apologized to Sirzechs," he said, frowning.

"For the three factions meeting? I might have felt bad before but now that we've socked each other in the face I'm not feeling so charitable."

"Dick," he accused me.

"Sure. I'm not the one who punches as a way of greeting."

"Touche. That was a bit blunt of me." He held his hand out to me. "Azazel. I prefer science and magical experimentation to punching people."

"Abyss," I shook his hand. Our gaze was a fair bit more hostile than when Sirzechs and I locked eyes. "I'm probably the expert in touki around here. Maybe the void too since Ophis isn't going to be chatty with anybody."

"Void? Actually, nevermind. We can talk later about scientific pursuits." Our hands separated.

"Look, I know this is a bad-"

"I'm not telling the kid," he interrupted me. "I know why you did what you did. He wouldn't get that. You threatened him to get to me. Not to hurt him. I'm not that much of an asshole." I nodded. He wasn't going to go spill the beans about me threatening Issei to the guy. I had said that I'd take his sacred gear if he didn't make one for me and I was serious, but there was no reason to drag the Red Dragon Emperor into the dark side of supernatural politics. It would be bad for both me and him and wouldn't help Azazel at all. No, that was going to stay buried for a long, long time if we could help it.

"See you around, then." I smiled at Azazel and he returned it, though it was a bit too sharp to be friendly.

"See you around." He walked away from me and I felt an arm on my shoulder.

"What. Was. That?" Yasaka asked slowly, anger permeating her tone. My smile turned to a grimace.

"Manly bonding," I lied. That was him venting on me for threatening his project and me showing him that I wasn't a piece of shit. Actual bonding would come later when we had cooler heads.

"Bullshit." Anyone could see that. Still, Yasaka shook her head and dragged me away from the staring, muttering crowds. By tomorrow everyone would be talking about me, for better or worse.

"What did you do to piss him off?" she hissed once we were away from the scene of the crime. Some people were always listening in but we were about as isolated as we were going to get without going into a closet or abandoned bedroom. That, though, would start rumors about us.

"I threatened what was his. He got pissed at me. Simple as that."

"And the 'kid'?" she asked coldly and quietly. I stared blankly at her for a second.

"What about him? He's fine."

"You threatened a child," she hissed angrily. I noticed some flickers of red dart through her golden eyes but brushed the oddity aside. Then I realized why she was angry.

"Oh, no I didn't. I wouldn't ever do that. I threatened one of Azazel's allies, one he was invested in… Yasaka, I would never threaten a child. Ever," I spoke lowly and as seriously as I could. Hurting children was just… no. Never. I'd seen some shit sweeping Vale's underworld and a lot more glimpsing at various worlds and I knew how terrible things could be. I wouldn't ever be so low.

"How old?" she asked sharply.

"Seventeen. He was dumb but he knew what he was getting into. Mostly. In any case I wouldn't have even killed him. I know I'm not the best person and making that threat was one of the worst things I ever did, but frankly I've done worse. But trust me in this, Yasaka. I have never, nor will I ever hurt somebody purely innocent and I wouldn't harm a child of my own free will." She looked conflicted about that but it cleared up in a moment to a tired look.

"I want to be allies with you but you can't just drop this on my lap, Abyss. People are going to say things, good and bad. Considering that you were accused by Azazel, whose not exactly reputable but whose words carry weight, of threatening somebody, it isn't going to look good for me."

"People will say good things or bad things no matter what. They'll say good things about my humility in apologizing to Sirzechs and they'll speculate on what I did to piss off Azazel. They'll wonder why I'm here after being isolated for months and they'll make wild gossip about me and whoever is the target of the week. It'll come and go. But for now and for the future I just won't act like a dick and people won't think I am one. I don't do terrible things for no reason, Yasaka. I had reasons for everything I did. Maybe not good reasons, but reasons nonetheless." She didn't look entirely placated but nodded in acceptance at my justification.

"Fine… but we will talk about this later," she threatened.

"I know, I know," I grumbled. She huffed and then strided away, snatching another drink from the serving tray as she left. I had a moment to stare.

"Sexy when she's angry," I muttered, eyeing her ass. Then I shook myself out of it and looked around for somebody to talk to. I needed a social shield for the night so I didn't have to fend off hanger-ons. I tried sensing all the auras in the room and immediately found what I was looking for. I grinned and walked with a purpose towards the only angel in the manor, who was alone feeling sad in a quiet corner of the manor.

Time to introduce myself to heaven.

"Excuse me," I said smoothly as I appeared to the woman. "Is this seat open?"

The woman, a cute blond lady in a white and gold dress, beamed, though her aura showed surprise at being approached. "Of course! I don't mind at all!"

I grinned and sat down. "Abyss Mavros, pleasure to meet you."

"Gabriel, archangel of Heaven…"

[|||| =-= ||||]

"And Michael said 'Uriel! I thought you swore on Lucifer's balls!' and Uriel said 'These aren't his?'" She giggled at her joke while I laughed freely at the antics of the angels.

"Poor Uriel. Was there anybody around to ask him if his experience blowing horns helped with Lucifer's balls?" Gabriel snorted, an action that didn't exactly scream' angelic beauty'.

"We were all too busy laughing to keep going."

"A missed opportunity," I concluded. She hummed in agreement, smiling widely.

"So I've kept from asking but… I heard that you punched Azazel in the face?" she asked excitedly.

"Well… yes," I admitted.

"Hah!" she cheered. "Take that, you panty stealing jerk!"

"Bad blood?" I asked. She nodded, still smiling.

"I don't hate him; I forgive him for turning his back on Father, of course, he's my brother and I love him, but that doesn't mean I don't enjoy seeing him punched in the face every now and then."

"I, too, enjoy seeing him punched in the face," I said, holding a hand to my chest.

"Ah, allies in our never ending battle against perversity," she nodded approvingly. I was silent and her smile dropped to a face of betrayal. "No…"

"If I wanted to I could have twenty young women draped over me at all times," I coughed.

"No!"

"Look, I care deeply for all of them," I said seriously. Gabriel pouted.

"Another pervert," she sighed.

"I still think it's Ophis' harem. Not mine." She blinked at that and some gears seemed to work in her head.

"Oh, you're lovers?" She had a strange note to her voice.

"She's actually pregnant." Gabriel somehow managed to choke on nothing at all and the two of us were silent for a second.

"You… you might not want to spread that around," she said, sounding strained.

"Bah, whatever," I waved away her concern. "Ophis mostly lays down wherever she wants in the house and eats all the food. She may seem terrifying to you all but she doesn't mean any harm to anybody unless you pester her… or try to steal what's hers, meaning me. I'd be more concerned with the threats that are actually threatening."

"… Perhaps," she allowed. Then she came to a realization. "Hey wait a minute! No distracting me! You're polygamous! How could you?!" I sighed, my ploy having failed.

"I played around a year ago, sleeping with several women at once, all knowing that they weren't the only one or my first priority. When I returned to this world, and this was like four or five months ago I think, I started seriously dating Kuroka, the S-class devil and one of the nicest people I've known, not that she doesn't have an edge to her. She encouraged me to get with other women, being into that or something. Then Ophis did her thing and what do you know, I had two lovers. Then that snowballed to three and it would have kept increasing if I hadn't put my foot down. Still, Kuroka thinks I'm going to end up with about five or more lovers."

"That makes a startling amount of sense," Gabriel seemed to think for a moment. "If it's just three and you honestly care about them and you're honest I suppose that's… acceptable. I was worried that you had a genuine harem. For somebody of your position it would be easy, not to mention tempting to be more promiscuous."

"It's less tempting than you'd think. I prefer sloth to lust." I smiled lightly and Gabriel nodded.

"Sloth is one of the lesser vices in my opinion. It's still a sin yet more forgivable so long as it is tempered. You seem to have the virtues to amend for your faults."

"Thank you," I said, appreciating the comment on my virtues. She smiled softly.

"I tend to align myself with kindness myself. I can see that you are of the same mind. You did come over here to make me feel less lonely, after all." I paused at that, remembering that I was using her to avoid socializing. I opened my mouth to voice this and she put a finger to my lips. "Shh. I know what you're thinking. You weren't just coming here to comfort me, I know, but you are a kind person nonetheless. You acted out of sloth for kindness yet if you were purely self-serving in coming here you wouldn't have spoken to me so casually or opened up to me. You're a good person. You just don't think so."

She looked at me differently then, looking less like an innocent angel and more like an actual angel, pure kindness in her eyes and an innate forgiveness of my faults. My throat closed up a little and I was quiet for a moment to collect myself. Her gaze reminded me far too much of Summer's.

"Acting kind wasn't my objective. It wasn't kindness in my actions but a desire to not be a dick." She nodded with a knowing smile. I felt a little irritated then, so when her face lost it's kindness for a flat smile and an angry stare I felt a little gratified. Then somebody smashed into me from behind.

"I forgive you, Abyss!" somebody young said loudly. Breasts pressed themselves against the back of my head but I was too annoyed to even give them cursory notice.

"We were having a moment actually, so if you don't-"

"Pleh! Gabby's boring! I'm here to save you from her! If you keep talking with her she'll sign you up for a life of temperance or to volunteer in a church or something stupid like that!" Gabriel's eyebrows scrunched together in anger. She took a deep breath and released the tension.

"Serafall, it's good to see you as always," she smiled serenely.

"She's saying she hates me and she wants me to go away," the Leviathan whispered in my ear, twirling around me to sit uninvited on my lap. The short lady looked up at me , giving me a perfect look down her dress and smiling innocently.

"I would never say something like that to you, Serafall. You're one of my closest friends." Gabriel would murder her in a heartbeat, I could tell. Her look of kindness and forgiveness had untold rage buried underneath it.

"Good to know you forgive me for the whole three factions meeting," I grunted, picking Serafall off my lap and setting her onto the chair next to me. She scooched next to me and leaned on my side.

"Yup! I'm just like Gabby!" Gabriel's fury could have melted titanium. The area around us seemed a little brighter as she unconsciously released a little light affinity. "After all, it's the job of a magical girl to spread kindness and joy!" Her smile turned a little catty. "But that doesn't mean I'm all virtuous, unlike Gabby." A hand trailed over my abs and I gently pushed it away. Gabriel seemed smug as Serafall pouted, though she didn't seem at all put off.

"So mean, Abyss… wanna make it up to me? I'd love to get to know you better!" I winced at the brief flare of light and sheer power from Gabriel. Both the devil and angel pretended not to notice it.

"Could you be more specific?" I asked. By Serafall's smirk I knew I'd messed up.

"Well~ I would say, but I wouldn't want to make innocent little Gabby blush. She's a total virgin; no idea how to make a guy happy." Gabriel would scream if she could. I was certain of it. "So instead of dragging you behind a bedroom door how about you drink with me?" I glanced at Gabriel to see her finishing rolling her eyes. She blinked and looked at me innocently, somehow daring me to say something without changing her expression at all.

"Just the two of us? I wouldn't want to leave Gabriel alone, she's been very kind by tolerating me imposing myself on her."

"Mmm, yeah, I'd have brought you into a drinking game but you're right that leaving Gabby out of it would be kinda mean." I had the vision of playing strip poker with the Satan. Gabriel would glare at me if I looked and it would only push Sera fall to flirt harder to get me in trouble with her.

"Instead of going off alone and drinking let's just jump straight to the action together!" I nearly smacked her. Gabriel spoke up first.

"Could you explain, Serafall? I doubt that you mean for Abyss to take both of us here and now, not just because I'm an angel." Left unsaid was any mention of Serafall being shy of doing it in public. It was more subtle than the Satan's way of insulting her but still effective.

"Of course not! I'd never make you just watch!" What was even happening right now? How did it come to this? "But if you were to get into a drinking game Abyss would definitely end up groping you and I kinda wanna see that. But of course I wouldn't just watch so he can grope me too!" I prepared my space affinity for a teleport away from these two and I wanted to cry when both of my wrists were grabbed by the two.

"Hm. I suppose you're not wrong. Abyss is fairly handsome and… kind." She blushed a little bit and Serafall grinned while I suffered. Why couldn't I have female friends? Helen didn't count.

"Mhm!" Serafall then pulled my hand to her chest. I pulled back but her other hand joined, making me grope her.

"Tch." Gabriel's eyes narrowed, her rage more of a cold anger now than an inferno. My other hand was pulled to the angel's chest as she smiled beautifully. I glanced away from the girls and saw a small crowd had formed… again. Worst of all was Azazel smirking at me cruelly with a camera in his hands, though the dark haired girl with glasses glaring at Serafall was almost worse. That was definitely Sona Sitri, Serafall's little sister.

"So who's better?" Serafall asked teasingly, squeezing my hand a little bit.

"It isn't about who has better breasts, Sera. It's about who has the kinder heart." Gabriel took the opportunity to bury my hand between her breasts and squeeze lightly. Serafall growled a little at that and they both stared at me expectantly.

I couldn't really respond, however, since inside my mind I was screaming 'fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck' over and over again. I always forgot that dxd was an ecchi anime. Stuff like this was par for the course with that kind of anime.

So what did the typical anime protagonist do when placed in this sort of situation?

Well, they normally blushed, stuttered, and got interrupted somehow but a short glance at the crowd showed that nobody was going to step in and drag me out of this clusterfuck. So what did the protagonist do when there was no distraction?

… They acted like idiots and got slapped. That was out.

Was magic a solution? No, this was social stuff, my only true weakness. Magic was out. So what could I do?

Ah, right, I could do what no anime protagonist had ever done before. Turn the charm up to eleven and flatter the shit out of the two girls I was with. Protagonist luck wouldn't work here. I had to claw my way out of this by my own actions and do the one thing nobody expected. Flirt back harder than anyone thought I was capable of! Refuge in audacity!

"Well," I started. "I'm sorry, Serafall but Gabriel's are softer," Serafall looked surprised at my audacity while Gabriel smirked at her, though there was a full blush on her cheeks. "But that's not bad at all. Yours are firmer and easier to cup, not to mention that they're bouncier. Yours are just as impressive as Gabriel's and appeal to different people." Now for the final blow, something Gabriel had hinted at. Honest kindness. Fear my most powerful attack!

"Both of you have nothing to be ashamed of and everything to be proud of. I'm sure someday you'll both find somebody who will treasure you and your bodies above any other." I shamelessly ripped off Gabriel's kind, understanding smile and cranked up the brilliance. Somebody in the crowd gasped in what I hoped was awe.

I was so fucked.

Gabriel looked shocked and had a prominent blush on her face, looking genuinely touched. Serafall was similarly wide-eyed and blushing.

Then she moved herself over to my lap and smashed her face against mine, her tongue sparring against mine passionately. She grabbed my arms and moved them to her waist firmly and tried to suck my soul out of me.

"Balls. Of. STEEL!" Azazel cackled in the crowd. People were cheering, laughing incredulously, or gawking at me but I was a little too distracted to notice with Serafall throwing herself at me.

She separated with a gasp and looked heatedly into my eyes, a small line of spit still connecting us. "Call me," she said seriously, slipping something into my pocket. Her number, I assumed. She wiped her lips, blush still plain on her face, and walked away with a bit of sway to her step. I only stared for a moment. Then I turned to Gabriel.

"I am so-" She leaned forwards and kissed me gently, her arms wrapped around my neck tenderly. The crowd went wild, Azazel screaming a cheer at the top of his lungs.

Her tongue flicked against my lips playfully as she pulled away from me. "So kind," she said fondly. Her smile was brighter than ever and she, too, slipped something into my pocket. "Thank you for telling me that, that I'll find someone one day. That was very, very kind of you." She poked me and my stunned face on the nose and giggled as she walked away in a different direction that Serafall.

I just sat there, my mouth open in shock at how the hell I had pulled that off.

"Buddy," Azazel swaggered up to me. "I forgive you. You're so, so forgiven. Forgiven a hundred times over. Hug up." He spread his arms.

"Dust, no," I said vehemently. He laughed and patted his camera before walking off, a bounce in his step. I leaned back as the crowd dispersed, leaving some congratulations for me and a few jealous looks.

A few minutes later Yasaka walked up to me. "Really?... Really?" She sounded so done with me. "Well… Your religion is going to swell."

"I hate everything," I murmured.

"Gods cause miracles. That? That was a miracle. I've never seen somebody have the… the balls to say that to either of those two. Ever. No wonder you have a harem with an attitude like that."

"Polyamorous," I mumbled.

"Mhmm. They gave you their numbers?"

"Yeah."

"Having a Seraph and a Satan show interest in the same man, both popular icons of their factions, filmed by Azazel no less? I think you just contributed more to real peace than anybody else tonight. Good job."

"Fuck this place. And Azazel. Can we leave now?" Yasaka sighed.

"Yes, we can leave. Let's go." I stood up and Yasaka put an arm around me as we walked away from the party. We didn't talk as we walked and found one of the hooded men in the teleporter rooms. He raised his arms and a magic circle appeared, changing the room back to Yasaka's home. We separated but before she opened the door she paused.

"We don't actually have to talk. That video is already going viral thanks to Azazel sending it to anybody who is anybody and I think I get what kind of person you are at this point." She leaned in and kissed me on the cheek because of course she did. I wasn't even surprised anymore.

"You're a nice person and if you've done some questionable things then I believe you when you say you had your reasons." She smirked and opened the door. "Kunou, we're home!" I walked out with her and saw Kunou, still in miko clothes, sitting on the couch and heard the familiar cry of Courage, The Cowardly Dog.

"This show is awesome!" she said excitedly. "I thought cartoons were mostly kids stuff! Oh, did you have a nice time?"

"We did, though Abyss got into trouble," Yasaka said, looking amused.

"Oooh, in the dog…" Kunou looked between my faunus ears and her and Yasaka's own fox ears and tails. Her mother snorted at the accidental joke.

"He was ambushed by the Leviathan and she drew Gabriel into one of her tricks again. Abyss had his hands pulled onto their chests and was asked which he liked more."

"Classic," The elementary schooler said fondly. I wondered if there was something deeply, fundamentally wrong with this world or if it was just supernatural culture that was so messed up that pulling a guy into groping was a 'classic'. I tended to stay at home or other worlds so I didn't know.

"And guess what he said?" She pulled her phone out and started typing something in.

"What?" Kunou asked excitedly. I sighed softly and edged towards the door.

"Both of you have nothing to be ashamed of and everything to be proud of. I'm sure someday you'll both find somebody who will treasure you and your bodies above any other." The video was followed by Serafall grabbing my face and making out with me. Kunou cracked up, Yasaka laughing with her. I had my face in my hands from embarrassment.

"The smile!" Kunou recognized, laughing harder. Then Gabriel kissed me on the screen.

"Gabriel was very impressed." Yasaka grinned. Then she sat down along with her daughter and looked to me, gesturing for me to sit down next to Kunou. I hesitated, knowing where this was going. Still, Kunou looked to me with a pleading smile and I caved like the softie I am.

I sat down on the other side of Kunou and Yasaka leaned over her daughter to rest her head on my shoulder, pushing Kunou against me at the same time. Not that she seemed to mind.

Just like that almost two hours passed as we watched Courage, Kunou falling asleep on me. I let the episode finish and stopped the videos. Kunou didn't wake up.

Yasaka pulled herself off of me and gently picked up Kunou. "She's such a sweet girl… she needs a father figure in her life,." I didn't respond to the blatant hint and stood up as she walked to her room. "Goodnight, Abyss." Yasaka kissed my cheek again and walked off with her daughter. I heard her door click shut and was left alone.

I felt weird going home that night, even if it was a short trip since I teleported. I took a walk through the woods but couldn't place the feeling I had. When I got home everybody but Esdeath was already asleep. It didn't take long before I got into my bed and the others joined me for sleep. Thoughts of the women who were interested in me didn't haunt my sleep. I did wonder if my future daughter would be at all like Kunou, though. It seemed to sink in then that I would be a father soon.

I realized that that feeling was the sensation of finally growing up. I didn't know if I liked that or not.

[|||| =-= ||||]

"Abyss what is this beautiful, glorious video of you making out with a Satan, Gabriel - THE Gabriel - kissing you, you groping both of them at the same time, and flirting the panties off of them? Tell me, oh amazing love of my life, what is this masterpiece?" Kuroka asked dramatically. She put down a phone with the video playing in the middle of the breakfast table for everybody to see.

"That's my life apparently," I said flatly.

"And what did you and Yasaka do, you naughty man?"

"She kissed me on the cheek and we watched some shows with her daughter."

"SCORE THREE FOR THE HAREM!"

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