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Chapter 9 - Chapter 9: A Shoulder to Lean On

The days after the exams seemed to stretch endlessly, filled with anticipation and an undercurrent of unease. Jane found herself wandering the hallways of the school, her thoughts flitting, between her parents, her friends and the weight of senior year.

It wasn't just the exam results that loomed over her; it was everything. The grief she tired to keep buried, the guilt she carried, and the constant feeling that she was barely holding it together.

After school, Jane headed to the library, hoping to lose herself in the quiet and escape her thoughts. She had barely settled into a corner table when Alexa plopped down across from her, her usually bright expression clouded.

"Hey," Alexa said softly

Jane looked up, surprised. " Hey, what's up?"

Alexa hesitated, " I just.. I didn't know where else to go, things at home are kind... of tense." Jane nodded, gesturing for her to continue.

" My parents had this huge fight last night," Alexa admitted. "It was bad. I don't know how to handle it. They always act like I am supposed to have everything figured out, but they can't even get along."

The vulnerability in Alexa's voice tugged at Jane's heart, she reached across the table and hugged her friend. "I am sorry Alexa, that sounds really hard."

"It is," Alexa said, her voice cracking. But I don't want to be a plus baggage to you, you have enough going on already.

"Hey," Jane said firmly. "You don't have to deal with this alone, I'm here for you no matter what."

That evening, Jane walked home with Archie. He had lingered by the school gate, waiting for her. "You Okay?" He asked as they strolled down the street.

Jane shrugged. " I don't know. There's just... a lot going on."

"Tell me about" Archie said, kicking a stray pebble down the sidewalk. "Sometimes I feel like we are all just pretending to have it all together, but actually we are all just kind of messed up."

Jane laughed softly. " Yeah, that sounds about right."

Archie stopped walking and turned to her face. " You know it's okay to lean on people Jane, you are always so busy being strong for everyone else, but you know you don't have to carry everything by yourself."

His words cut her off guard. She opened her mouth to speak, but nothing came out.

"It's not a bad thing to need people," Archie added his voice softer now." We all do."

When Jane got home, she found Jeremy sitting on th couch, flipping through channels on the TV

"Hey," he said as she dropped her bag on the floor by the door side. "Rough day?"

Jane nodded sinking on the couch beside Jeremy. He handed the remote ober to Jane to put the tv channel she wanted. It was a small gesture but it spoke volumes.

"Thanks", she said quietly.

"Anytime", he replied.

Later that night, Jane sat on the porch steps, staring at the stars. Aunty Kate joined her wrapping a shawl around her shoulder.

"You have been quiet today", Aunty Kate said gently.

"Just..... thinking," Jane replied.

"Anything you want to share?"

Jane hesitated, then nodded. "Its hard, you know?, Balancing everything - school, friends, family it feels like I'm supposed to have all the answers, but I don't."

Aunty Kate placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. "You don't have to, have all the answers Jane and you don't have to do it alone. Thats why you have people who care about you - to share the load with.

Her words settled under Jane like a warn blanket offering a comfort she had not realized that she needed. That night as Jane lay in bed, she thought about people in her life - Alexa, Ruth, Archie and Auntie kate had always been there for her in many ways whether big or small.

---

The sky was overcast the following morning, a pale gray that seems to press against the earth. Jane sat by the window in her room, staring out at the barren tree's swaying gently in the wind. Her journal lay open on her lap, the blank page staring back at her like a silent challenge. Words never came easily to Jane, especially when it has to do with her emotions. She prefer to bury her feelings under the routine of school, chores and obligation. But the events of the past few days - the exam, the lingering grief, the fragile connectio, she was rebuilding, felt toheavy to ignore.

Her pen hovered over the page. "what do I even say?"

The creek of her bedroom door broke her thoughts. it was Jeremy, leaning casually against the frame.

"You okay?" He asked

Jane hesitated before nodding " Just... In my thoughts". "That's dangerous", he teased lightly, stepping inside, but he's playfuy tone softened when he saw the journal on her lap. "Writing Something?"

"Trying to", she admitted " but I don't know where to start".

Jeremy sat on the edge of her bed, with his hands on his knees. "You know, Dad use to say that the hardest part of anything is starting. Once you get past that it gets

easier ".

Jane nodded her grip tighting on the pen.

"Thanks", she said softly.

Later that day, Jane met Alexa, Ruth and Archie at the library, it was meant to be a casual study session, but the air between them felt heavier than usual.

" I had this dream last night", Alexa said suddenly, breaking the silence. She closed her textbook and leaned back to her chair. " I was running through this maze and no matter where I turned I could not find the exit."

Jane glanced at her friend, noting the dark circles under her eyes, "Sounds stressful?"

"It was," Alexa admitted " I think it's about my parents."they are always pushing me beyond my limits and I feel like... Like I'm not ever good enough.

Ruth reached over and placed a hand on Alexa's arms. "You are more than enough". She said firmly. Jane wanted to add something but the word caught in her throat, she wasn't used to speaking up in moment's like these.

" At times, parents cause a lot of pain, Mine doesn't even care if I fail or succed. Half the time, I don't even think they even notice what I am doing, It won't kill if they showed me care, support, love encouragement, fulfillment and many more." Archie softly said

The room fell silent after Archie's words. Jane looked at her friends, noting they are all carrying hidden wounds, quiet strength's, like she was.

"You know," Jane said, her voice trembling slightly." I think we forget how much words matter. Like... the things we say to ourselves and what other's say to us."

Alexa nodded "it's true", I replay the things my parents say in my head most of the time, not just the bad stuff but also when I'm praised and all that, "It's like a lifeline."

"Same," Ruth admitted " Even little things can make a difference."

Archie shrugged "Gues I should start being more nicer, huh?"

They laughed, the tension easing slightly. But Jane could tell the conversation has left an impact on them.

That evening, Jane found herself in the kitchen with Aunty Kate, helping prepare dinner. As they chopped vegetables, Jane shared bits of her conversation with her friends.

"Words are powerful," Aunty Kate said thoughtfully. "They can heal, but they can also wound. It's why we need to choose them carefully."

Jane paused, her knife hovering over a carrot. "What about the things we don't say? Do they matter too?"

"Sometimes even more," Aunty Kate replied. "Silence can speak volumes. But it's never too late to say what's in your heart."

---

Before bed, Jane returned to her journal. This time, the words came more easily. She wrote about her parents, about Jeremy, about her friends. She wrote about the things she wished she could say but didn't know how to.

As she closed the journal, she felt a strange sense of relief. The weight of her unspoken words had lessened, if only slightly.

She realized that words—spoken or written, shared or kept private—had the power to connect, to heal, and to remind her that she wasn't alone.