"I'd advise against that," Shiller shook his head, "Unless you're itching for a showdown with old Osborn at New York University."
Stark palmed his forehead and said, "How could I forget him? That damnable old fox nearly tricked Peter into becoming a test subject for human experimentation. I've yet to settle the score with him!"
Just as he said this, there was a loud "bang", and the balcony glass shattered. Spider-Man burst in, hastily pulling the balcony curtains closed, paying no mind to the people having dinner in the living room, and took a deep breath where he stood.
He slowly turned around and asked, "Venom, are you here? Sorry, I broke your window, I'll pay for it, but for now, can I hide here...?"
As he finished turning, he stopped, staring at the four people in the room. He forced a chuckle and said, "Good morning, sirs. I just, uh... stumbled in. I'll be going now..."
With that, he tried to sneak off to the side, but Shiller and Stark cleared their throats simultaneously. Spider-Man despondently sighed, "Alright, I shouldn't have barged in so rudely, and I broke Mr. Eddie's window. But I promise I'll pay for it!"
"What are you trying to hide from?" Shiller asked, puzzled.
Spider-Man hesitated for a moment, an unusual look of indecision on his face. He even grabbed an unopened can of beer from the table, lifted his mask, and chugged it down.
Stark's eyes went wide, staring at Spider-Man as if he did not recognize him. Choked by the beer, Spider-Man ended up removing his mask entirely, tossing it to the side, sitting next to Eddie and saying, "Chief George... well, Gwen's father, is after me."
Peter sighed, "One time Gwen nearly slipped, drawing George's suspicions. We both know that if George finds out that I am Spider-Man, he would never allow his daughter to be with me!"
"So, to throw off suspicion, I had to create two identities and alibis."
"For instance, when having dinner at Gwen's house, I'd use the time, when I supposedly went to the bathroom, to change into my suit, swing by the newspaper office and then rush back. Or when Chief George spots Spider-Man, I'd be on a date with Gwen, bumping into their neighbor..."
Thor stifled a laugh, covering his mouth. He cleared his throat to Peter's reproachful gaze, "So, you're planning to deceive your future father-in-law forever?"
Peter exhaled deeply but then looked at Shiller, asking, "Doctor, do you have any breakfast? I just came from nearby the police station and didn't have the chance to eat."
Shiller stood up, walked over to the island and said, "Fried eggs and cold cuts are all gone. I'll make you a sandwich. Let's see..."
As he sorted through the remaining ingredients on the table, Shiller said, "We're out of chicken breast, only the legs are left. Do you want to remove the skin? We also have some broccoli, some kale, some peas..."
"Put it all in, thanks. I need extra bread; I'm starving," Peter patted his stomach, "These days I haven't had the time to eat. I've been surviving on Stark Group's nutritional drinks. This is really tough work."
As the sandwich was served, Peter sighed, "In the beginning, Gwen and I intended to share the truth with George the first time I went to Stacy's house for dinner."
"But at my first visit, George recognized me immediately. He asked me if I was the outstanding young scientist mentioned in the newspaper? Was I the one who received a full scholarship as well as the award for best graduate? Even getting internships in several large corporations in advance and publishing over 10 major research papers..."
Thor looked at him curiously, "So, are you?"
"Of course, I am. And the reports didn't even cover everything... But that's beside the point. George's first impression of me was too good." Peter covered his face with a hand, "He held me in such high regard that I couldn't bring myself to tell him I'm Spider-Man, especially after he had criticized Spider-Man for ruining New York's environment in front of Gwen and me"
"When did you ruin New York's environment? Oh, you mean the web thing. Well, that's a black mark against Spider-Man."
"It's worse than that," Peter laughed, the tone of his voice laced with absurdity, "The environment damage was caused by the first generation Spider-Man. Currently, I am the third generation Spider-Man, and my reputation is even worse!"
Everyone chuckled and Thor, clapping Peter on the shoulder, said, "If you confess that you've come back from the dead, he'll certainly disapprove of his daughter..."
"Don't remind me." Peter sniffled, biting into his sandwich ferociously, his cheeks puffed out from chewing. However, Thor's expression stiffened in short order as though he had remembered something, and he turned to Stark, "Tony, how did you explain Helen to your parents?"
"Well..." Stark hesitated, "You have to understand, there's no way I could have fooled Howard and Maria. Helen doesn't look much like me, but she looks remarkably similar to Loki..."
However, he quickly added, "But her not looking like me has its benefits too. Otherwise, those paparazzi form tabloid papers would have ruined Helen's reputation..."
Thor squinted at him, "You did not tell them Helen is your illegitimate child, did you? Tony Stark, I must warn you, Loki is a prince of Asgard. Sometimes a princess, but that doesn't matter. You mustn't let Helen bear the dishonor of being illegitimate. It would disgrace Asgard too!"
"I know, I know..." Stark said soothingly, "But you have to give me some time. People of their era have trouble understanding the concept of 'gender fluidity'..."
"Couldn't you just tell them the truth?" Shiller chuckled. Stark glared at him and retorted, "How am I supposed to tell the truth? That Helen is your creation? You're even worse than Loki. You don't even have the decency to be gender fluid!"
Shiller smiled and remained silent, focusing on the salad on his plate. Thor huffed, "If you were any kind of man, you'd take responsibility. Loki is an excellent god, very popular in Asgard..."
Just then, the knock on the only remaining glass door of the balcony interrupted him. Thor turned and saw Loki standing outside the door, smiling at him.