My name is Shen Lu.
I was named by my grandfather, who, from my experience as a child, is not a good person.
Let's not talk about other things, let's talk about my name, his own name is very nice, but he had to make my name so strange.
Whenever I protested to my grandfather, he always said, "If it's your father's fault, it's because he's not a girl, otherwise you wouldn't have gotten this name.
Obviously, he was the one who gave me such an ugly name, but in the end, he blamed it all on my dad.
Ah, speaking of which, I forgot to introduce myself.
My grandfather, Shen Xiujin.
I heard he was particularly charming when he was young.
My grandmother, Jane Tong.
I sometimes wonder how these two people, who don't seem to match at all, got together.
My grandfather and grandmother divorced before my father was born.
After the divorce, my grandfather never remarried and my grandmother never married again.
They should have parted ways, but my grandfather was so shameless that he went to my grandmother's place.
For as long as I can remember, my grandfather has been trying to please my grandmother.
My Grandpa Yuhang said, "Your grandfather has never bowed down to anyone in his life, and he is so tough that everyone is afraid of him.
But I don't think he's right, no matter how I look at it.
If my grandfather was so tough, why would he behave like the family's golden hair when my grandmother stared at him?
Besides, have you ever seen a man with a cooking skill comparable to that of a five-star chef?
Ever since I was a kid, my grandfather's cooking was the best in the family, even better than the hotel chef we hired.
Grandfather woke up in the morning and went to walk the dog, and when he came back, he had a bunch of extra ingredients in his hand.
By the time my grandfather was busy in the kitchen all morning, when my grandmother woke up, there must be a steaming hot meal on the dining room table, not necessarily very sumptuous, but very cozy.
Grandma never touched the water, even when she touched the water the most, she only watered the flowers in the garden, Grandpa said, grandmother is very good.
I secretly asked my grandfather, you get up early every day to cook, three meals a day, but also to work, so every day, is a serious work, there is also a legal holiday, you do not fall a day, not tired?
Grandfather looked at the garden, is eating his hand-made afternoon tea grandmother, smiling with a silly fork, his old man said:
"Your grandmother likes it, I'm happy with whatever I do. I, ah, happy to spoil her, the best to spoil her, other men she can not see, so that your grandmother in this life will not have time to think of leaving me."
There were other little things besides.
All I know is that my grandfather spoiled my grandmother, which can be described as "crazy".
I always think that my grandmother is so pretentious, such a good grandfather, not to remarry, I said this to my grandfather, my grandfather has never been red to me, that time, gave me a hard slap on the buttocks, my grandfather said, "little brat, in the future so think of your grandmother, I will not beat you to death.
Your grandmother is the best grandmother in the world.
Remember, from now on, be filial to your grandmother.
If you don't, I'll be fine. If you don't, I'll cook you roast pork with chestnuts.
At that time, I was very aggrieved, obviously I was angry for my grandfather.
Later, I realized that there was a past between my grandfather and grandmother.
Late one night, I was hungry, get out of bed to find food to go, passed by my grandmother's room, the door was closed, I was curious to peek inside, and saw the scene, almost did not shock me.
My grandfather was holding my grandmother's foot and resting it on his chest.
I was so shocked that I ran to my dad's bedroom and asked, "Is Grandpa a pervert? I saw him holding my grandmother's feet... Grandfather has a foot fetish?"
"Your grandfather was covering your grandmother's feet, your grandmother's health is not good, cold hands and feet all year round, your grandfather loves your grandmother. If you see it, pretend you didn't see it, don't ever tell your grandfather about it."
"Why?"
"Because your grandfather will punish you for writing big letters."
"Dad, how do you know so well?"
"It's a very sad story. Be good, Fawn, your mother and I have business to attend to."
Grandfather never remarried, grandmother never remarried. My childhood memories are of the daily routine of this grandfather and grandmother who were not married.
Grandmother was a person of few words, but every time she said something, everyone in the family didn't dare to refute it.
Not because of fear of grandmother, but grandfather favors grandmother, this is a common knowledge of the family.
Children have never had much sense of time, and when I did, it was the day my grandmother passed away.
I was eight years old when my grandmother passed away.
It was a day in early spring, my grandmother, as usual, sitting under the tree in the garden, eating afternoon tea made by my grandfather, my grandmother's favorite is always that rocking chair, placed under the tree, when tired, lie down for a nap.
Grandfather would go to cover grandmother with a thin blanket, counting the time, to wake her up.
But on this day, Grandfather was never able to wake Grandmother.
Grandmother passed away peacefully in her rocking chair as the wind blew the rocking chair around and around, in the green of the revival of all things.
Grandmother had no sudden illnesses, so she left the world peacefully on this spring afternoon.
She left her grandfather.
I will never forget, never strong grandfather, old tears wet, whimpering and crying, long squatting next to grandmother's rocking chair, I will never forget grandfather is no longer young hand, tightly holding grandmother has gradually cold but stiff palm, at that time, grandfather cried like a child.
Mom and Dad stood not far away, but did not step into this small garden. At that time, I did not understand, didn't Mom and Dad feel bad?
Later I realized that Mom and Dad were giving Grandpa and Grandma the space to be alone at the end.
Grandmother's funeral ceremony was not grand, but the whole S city, the dignified family, all came.
Grandfather arranged the funeral for Grandma.
After sending off his grandmother, his grandfather's health began to deteriorate inexplicably.
He couldn't find out the cause of his illness, but he became much weaker.
My father said your grandfather was sick at heart.
What's a heart condition?
I don't dare to ask.
It's just that every year after my grandmother's death, my grandfather would hold my grandmother's picture and look at it carefully, as if she were still alive.
Grandfather would occasionally speak to Grandmother's picture, as if he were having a conversation with Grandmother.
As spring began again, everything was revitalized.
Grandfather pulled me in and said, "Like."
"Like what?"
"Like your grandmother."
"Grandfather, don't be sad." That year, I was already fourteen years old, and I knew more, and heard more stories about my grandfather and grandmother from other people's ears.
Incredibly, when I first heard the story of my grandfather and grandmother, I was angry, angry at my grandfather for not knowing people well, not knowing what was good and bad, and my grandfather was too self-righteous, and didn't know anything, so he wasted his time and hurt my grandmother.
When I heard the story later, I felt that my grandmother was so heartless. If I were you, I wouldn't see my grandfather again, not even once.
My mind went up and down with their story.
I blamed my grandmother for her lack of character.
Later, my grandma Sumon said that your grandmother made concessions to fulfill the love-hate relationship.
Your grandfather also learned to cherish, not like many men in the world, get and then no longer cherish.
The way your grandfather favored your grandmother was like a wife-doting maniac.
The story of my grandfather and grandmother, when I heard the last, but I was silent, no longer blame my grandfather could not see his own true heart, also no longer blame my grandmother's position is not firm.
As my grandmother Su Meng said, between those two, one person no longer drilled into the bull's-eye, let the step, only to have the relationship finally complete.
I couldn't help but think that if the dead end had been reached, and my grandmother had beaten her to death and not turned back, would it have turned out to be two unfortunate lives, between them?
"Grandfather, I've heard the love story of you and grandmother, the beginning was not happy at all,"
Grandfather smiled and touched my head, "Thanks to your grandmother's concession, only then did she fulfill my love. Your grandmother she didn't want to remarry me, I know why, and she thought that little secret, I didn't know."
"What little secret?"
I asked curiously, but Grandfather laughed without saying anything.
"By the way, Grandfather, why do you love Grandmother so much, but when I was growing up, I never heard you give Grandmother words of love?
Once, Grandmother even complained to me, Grandma Su Meng and Grandma Vivian, saying that you do everything for her, but you just refuse to say the three words 'I love you'... Grandfather, why won't you say it to Grandmother?
Grandmother obviously wants to hear it so badly."
Grandfather laughed, a pale but joyful laugh, like a mischievous little child, "I know, I know she wants to hear it."
"Then why don't you say so?"
Grandfather, however, withdrew his smile, deliberate and firm:
"She wanted to hear those three words so badly, of course I couldn't say them to her.
Otherwise, if she hears it too much, if she hears it enough, she won't want to hear it in her next life, and what if she doesn't come to me anymore?
If I don't say it, she'll always remember it, and in the next life, ah, she, your grandmother, will still be mine."
Saying this, grandfather smiled with a thieving face.
Grandfather seemed a bit tired, took a piece of snack from the stone table and gave it to me, waving his hand wearily, "Good boy, take it and eat it."
I loved my grandfather's snacks the most, and ran away with them.
That afternoon, I took my original English books to my grandfather and asked him to read Shakespeare to me in a pure English accent, and my grandfather's thick accent was especially pleasing to the ear.
"Grandfather, read me Shakespeare." I reached out and nudged my grandfather, who was napping in his recliner, but no matter what, I could no longer wake up his old man.
Grandfather was gone, peacefully, in his sleep, on the same spring afternoon, under the garden tree, in the same recliner where Grandmother had died, just as Grandmother had that year.
Grandfather's hand, pinching the pocket watch, pocket watch, is the grandmother's photo, the photo, grandmother gentle smile, recliner, grandfather's old lips, gently hooked shallow smile.
The sky was blue, the breeze was gentle, and my grandfather was gone.
I know, grandfather went, do not hold a trace of regret, he is to follow the grandmother, the most precious person in his life to go.
This life, grandfather did not marry, grandmother did not marry, who did not mention the year thing, but finished the envy of the next person not come to the second half of life.
"Grandfather, you went to find grandmother, right?"
I can't hear my grandfather's answer anymore, but I know that the most serious and persistent thing my grandfather did in his life was to seriously spoil my grandmother.
Eventually, I saw in my grandfather's belongings the last notes he left behind--
"Shen Xiu Jin loves Jane Tong, for life.
Wife, I'm coming for you."
I was a bit stunned, my grandfather did not say the word "think" from beginning to end, but a short sentence, revealing the deepest feelings of longing.
"Grandfather, don't bully grandmother O in your next life."