The sun was shining brightly on the training grounds, the creeks and the light breeze singing quietly a mourning tune for the fallen during the attack, happened weeks before .
I met with my team, and I gave to each of my genin a scroll in which I had listed exercises and whatnot to help them train themselves "The only thing war decides is who is left."
I stated, observing how Choji seemed to take it at face value, Ino frowning lightly, likely trying to string together what I said with the other lessons that I gave them. And Shikamaru was... studying me pretending to be bored? Oh, kid. I was amused.
"You've never been at war, you were too young for the last." The Nara objected.
I snorted: "Wars are all the same. They begin under the direction of a few people, too prideful or narrow-minded to do anything else."
I rose from my seated position: "When war begins, the people who order it ignore that, no matter how right they feel, they have no idea about who is going to die.
They don't know whose children are going to scream and burn, what great dreams and futures are going to be snuffed out before they have their chance to shine, because the only ones to know the price of war, are the futures cut down along with those that would have birthed them."
My tone had turned from serious to frosty: "Nobody knows how many lives shattered, to never be mended, because those in charge never considered doing at the start what they will end up doing at the end: sit down, and talk."
Ino frowned, sensing that I was actually furious: "Sensei... You talk like this war wasn't in the working since the last one ended."
She shook her head, the illusions she believed into as a child had been shattered with their first wet work. Shattered by me, by my stories, by my stubborn and careless decision of making sure the next generation would see using chakra as a weapon like it was the dumbest thing ever thought.
"At the end of the day, sensei, we are shinobi." Choji continued her train of thought: "We will protect our families, our teammates, and by extension, our village."
I shook my head lightly, the Akimichi may have been the kindest of my students, but somewhere along the way, I turned a kind man into an angry one. Another failure to add to my list of sins. I thought tiredly.
"The only way anyone can live in peace, is for everyone to be prepared to forgive, and we all should be the change we want to see in the world." I answered quietly, before clapping my hands and recalling my ducklings to order.
"You got your exercises, Choji, Ino. Shika, walk with me for a bit." I stated, and started walking alongside the little lake, taking in the gentle ripples the breeze was causing on the water."Anything you wish to tell me?" I raised an eyebrow, not bothering hiding my smirk. The young Nara tsked.
"So you noticed? Troublesome."
"You're five years too early to lie to any jonin effectively, and... Shika, not to brag, but I am a motherfucking Sage, it grants me more than simple chakra sensing." I snorted.
Shikamaru sighed, his shoulders slumping ever so slightly: "Uncle Inoichi asked a lot of questions about your lessons, he wondered if I could try and figure out if..."
"If I am a traitor of some kind?" I asked with a smirk. The young Nara grunted, if in agreement or not, I couldn't tell.
"My unconventional lessons had only one purpose, can you guess it?" I asked "And by unconventional lessons, I mean most of our 'story time'."
The once lazy genius crossed his arms, his light frown deepening: "... prospective."I didn't bother in hiding my grin: "I wanted to see if I would be able to make you see the world without the rose-tinted glasses of propaganda, yes."
"So we are an experiment to you?" He bit back, already knowing my answer. I shrugged, his indignation meant very little to me: "The Sandaime ordered me to teach, without a doubt to get a reading of some kind on me."
"Why the hell would the Hokage put to risk the heirs of three of Konoha's most prominent clans under someone he didn't trust?" Shikamaru proved himself quick on the uptake.
"Risk is a big word. I couldn't afford to half-ass your training because you were the heirs of three of Konoha's most prominent clans, Shikamaru, I taught you to see the bigger picture. You have all the clues you need, and I'll answer your questions, but make the right ones."
I reprimanded him. He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose, and after a minute he asked again: "Why would the Hokage need such a roundabout way to get a 'reading' on you?" But from his tone, I knew it was a rhetoric question.
"You've never given any kind of doubt regarding your loyalty to the village, otherwise we wouldn't be talking..." He reasoned out loud: "and we talked about perspective..."I nodded, encouraging him to keep following that logic train.
"How did you develop an impartial point of view in the first place?" he wondered then.
I grimaced, it was a good question, but it wouldn't lead where I wanted him to go, so I tried another route: "What do you think makes us human?" He raised both his eyebrows and his expression went slack in surprise, tilting his head to my non sequitur.
"And what actually is human progress?" I asked again."Do you know why Hashirama founded Konohagakure and dragged humans in the Age of Hidden Villages from the Age of Warring Clans?" I asked suddenly, I demanded an answer to that last question.
"Because he wanted to protect the young who otherwise would have been forced into war at 4 years old?" Shikamaru answered with the first thing that popped into his mind. I nodded mockingly.
"Oh, yes, so that instead of using children as meat shields we now have five years to grind them through the academy. He revolutionized the world to give children five years during which they could dedicate their efforts to learn how to better kill other children." the sarcasm was heavy in my tone.
Shikamaru gritted his teeth in annoyance but didn't rise to my bait."Try again."
I told him, and I was no longer his benevolent teacher, but the merciless hammer that had crushed Orochimaru, I was the weapon that the world we were into had forced me to become."...He went beyond his clan's rivalry with the.." he tried to answer.
"Hashirama founded Konohagakure because he could." I cut my student.
"Thereby strengthening his clan and making it wealthier with the system he..." Shikamaru tried to defend his answer."Do you actually believe he founded the village, captured and gifted biju around for money ?"
Shikamaru frowned: "I'm guessing in that way he reduced the risk of clan children starving, and provided a fortress were shinobi could actually feel safe, a place where scientists and whatnot wouldn't be assaulted in the night and be killed after having their research stolen..."
I snorted."You would measure human progress by the advancement in technology or the ever-growing monetary flow?" I asked sardonically.
"In that case, why don't we sterilize some clan children and sell them to the higher bidder when they are still under one year old?" I shook my head patronizingly.
"The progress of any form of society is measured through the value attributed to the lowest of its components. That civilian who got drunk and drowned in its puke in that alley two days ago, an unimportant life, a life without privilege.
The life of the akasen that disappeared in the night and got himself signed up for the academy in exchange for a rice ball."
I grabbed Shikamaru's shoulders with an iron grip: "The value of those lives, it's your value. That is what defines an Age, and That is what defines a species. If I failed to teach you anything else, I hope I managed to teach you this."
"What was that talk about the ones in charge not knowing what the price is..." He started, prodding for a reaction.
Like I had always enjoyed doing, my answer was far from any he could have expected."Integrity without knowledge is weak and useless, it makes one a tool for the knowledgable."
I was clearly referring to Choji, who had translated my lessons in 'annihilate threats to the ones you love'.
"And knowledge without integrity is dreadful and dangerous, making one alone and prone to madness." Orochimaru first example, and I acutely feared the more... the feral side I had forced Ino to accept when I tossed her into the Forest of Death, so many months before.
She knew a basic truth: in the end, humans are very effective animals, but animals nonetheless.
And so she came to classify other humans in three categories: prey, fellow predators, and enemy predators. At her core, she had regressed from a cheerful and empty fangirl to a deadly, calculating predator.
Inoichi had likely noticed something along those lines, it was understandable why he disliked me so much.
How did I ruin Shikamaru, I wonder? I couldn't help but ask myself.
...
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