Yu pursed her lips and looked down at Nicholas who was counting a plethora of different items, going over a small list in his left hand.
"So... What're you up to?"
She felt that asking would make her question the man's intelligence but she did it anyway, the behaviour of a Neanderthal made for an interesting pastime... so she thought at least.
And it wasn't like she had a lot to do until she summone-... nevermind.
"Prepping, I heard we was headed to Rome this time... about the only thing I did hear from the nerds." Nicholas answered without looking up, picking up an umbrella and looking it up and down with narrowed eyes.
Huh, was he actually being smart about something for once?
"I got the camera and the umbrellas, sunscreen, a mini-freezer from Bill's old shit... Martha's cooking the sandwiches and stuff with Emiya." He gestured to the counter, because the cafeteria was the best place to gear up for a mission concerning the fate of humanity as a whole, "BB said she could hook us up with a radio and some screens."
Yu smacked herself.
... It was stupid of her to think he was capable of comprehensive thought.
Ignoring her masochism, Nicholas went back to his stuff, holding up a sawed-off shotgun, "I got a piece in case we meet a priest talking about my kid."
"Yeah, your ki-..." Yu paused, "Wait what? What kid? You have a kid?!"
Nicholas flatly looked up at her before slowly raising his hand and pointing at the excitable blonde sitting at the counter...
"Yes, because someone called the damned Knight of Betrayal is a child."
"Chill bitch, you wanna get clocked? She innocent."
Yu groaned and gave up, mostly because she knew full well he WOULD clock her across the face and hit her harder than others because she could regenerate, "Do whatever you want. That's all you ever do anyway."
"I mean..." Nicholas shrugged, "If you had something to say that made some actual sense, maybe I'd listen."
"...So telling you to be serious about a matter concerning your whole race is nonsensical?"
"Since when did you start caring?"
Wait a second...
...
...Holy shit he was right, she didn't care.
Damn.
"Besides, having a bit of fun is better than being tense and shit. You liable to mess up and all that if you do that." Nicholas nodded wisely, picking up the travel backpack he'd stole-...er... 'appropriated' from Gudako and carefully placing his stuff into it, "Olga said that."
Yu held up a finger, opening her mouth to say something but ultimately decided to keep put and lower it.
Either she herself was stupid and not able to see Mount Tai... The Chinese Immortal smacked herself again for even thinking of that stupid insult her people had come up with.
Anyway, it was either that she was unable to see the wider reaching effects of Nicholas' 'seemingly' stupid actions or that Olga's blatant favouritism made her rationalise the teenager's actions in a way that they seemed smart.
To be honest... she didn't really want either to be the truth.
Fate decided not to leave her alone with her thoughts and Artoria walked over, cradling a variety of snacks and videogames.
She then proceeded to dump all she had on the floor near Nicholas.
"This too."
Had she just... Had she really just done that?
Oh... shit.
"..." Nicholas flatly looked up from his crouched position, his violet eyes boring into the corrupted Saber's golden ones, "Bitch... if you don't pick that shit u-"
"No." Artoria even cut him off, the corners of her lips turning up ever so slightly in what was possibly a smirk, "See I can use that word t-...mmph!"
She was cut off too.
But not by words.
Nicholas grabbed her by the mouth and yeeted her through the 'metal' wall, creating a perfect Artoria shaped design.
Offering a silent prayer for the British Monarch, Yu then proceeded to shamelessly forget her, "...These British."
"Fo sho, fucking Brits man. She gets to stay back here with the others for that." Nicholas nodded in agreement, turning to Kiyohime who was sitting nearby, just... just staring at them through slitted eyes, "Clean this up."
"Of course~." The dragon hummed and got to work.
The few denizens of Chaldea in the cafeteria didn't even bat an eye at the sudden 'incident', a little too used to each other's bullshit.
Shaking his head, the pale haired teenager zipped up his bag and threw it to a chair before jumping to his feet, "Anyone know if Italy had bit-... Beaches back in 60 AD?"
"Oh, I do! I was born in the 1st century!" Martha shouted from the kitchen, putting on oven mitts, "I have some beef with the Rom... wait a second, what? I believe I was around France at the time we're headed to...Wait a second, are we headed out to save and help the child of Tiberius Claudius?"
"... Watch her pop off like I know even one of those names." Nicholas chortled, not knowing the sudden conundrum he'd forced upon the Saint of Tarascon.
-
When everyone left the cafeteria to head for the central command room, Nicholas looked around to make sure that really was the case before sauntering over to the counter and taking a seat, "Yo Martha, come out here a sec."
"...What is it?" The purple haired Saint peeked over the counter, "I'll be with you once I'm done making the sandwiches you asked for."
"Cool."
Nicholas rested his head on a hand, tapping the free one against the counter in a horrible rhythm.
He'd grown up with Christains, and knew enough to connect the dots about why she'd looked so conflicted when she realised they were headed over to save the Roman Empire from an early collapse.
It was the Romans who crucified Jesus in 30 or 33 AD.
...It'd be surprising if she wasn't annoyed about having to help preserve not the people but the very government that put the man to the cross.
Hell, seeing how annoyed she was made him consider just not heading to help them so he could only guess how someone that was prosecuted by the guys would feel.
They were headed to 60 AD.
That was like, not even one generation after the fact.
It didn't take Martha long to finish her work and she walked out of the kitchen holding a wicker basket with a white cloth draped over it.
"Oh? You waited?"
"Course." Nicholas smiled faintly, this was the type of chick man needed to wife up, "Why wouldn't I?"
She'd spent a few hours the day before gaming with him just because he liked it and even praised him for his Platinum Bloodborne simply for the sheer effort he put in.
"Well..." The Saint squirmed slightly, seriously considering something before she let out a sigh and regarded him with tinted cheeks, "L... Lately, I feel like you don't want me around anymore..."
Nicholas suddenly chortled, breaking into a faint chuckle before, "Pft-... Hahahahaha...!"
He started laughing, nay, cackling like a madman.
Instantly understanding why he was laughing at her, Martha flushed, partly angry, partly embarrassed and partly happy, but mostly shocked as fu-, "Y...You can laugh?"
She looked like she was about to cry.
"Nah, I can't believe you'd actually ask that." Nicholas wiped a tear from his eyes, "How could I ever get bored of Martha Tyson?"
"W-Who's that?!"
"Real talk though, I'd probably lose my shit if you decided to up and leave one day." Nicholas suddenly stopped making fun of her and told her the blunt truth, "I actually can't believe you stick around."
He wasn't a man of God but he thanked every single God out there she was interested in someone like him.
"I couldn't do a day without you scolding my ass."
Martha stared at him in complete silence, realising this was probably the most he'd ever genuinely say to someone, "I...I knew but... why don't you ever say something?"
"Huh..." Nicholas tilted his head in genuine confusion, "I thought we was past that part, my bad."
"..."
It was cute that she was just staring at him.
But well, after like two minutes passed and she was still staring at him with an expression he couldn't even understand, even Nicholas got concerned.
"What? ...Did I mess up?" Nicholas clicked his tongue and clenched his fist, getting up to leave, "I told Kiara's stupid ass this shit doesn't work like that. You never tell a chick you like her."
"T...Thank you, Lord, for blessing me and forgive me for what I'm about to do."
Martha grabbed the man she believed was 100% a gift from God and committed an unwise act that did not match the image of a Saint with the biggest grin.
-
Hope you enjoyed the chap.
Next chap singularity start.