"Robert and Daphne, I give you my sincerest apology from the bottom of my heart. I was wrong to have hurt and endangered you in my selfishness."
Elwin spoke with his head lowered, almost bowing, hand by his heart. He resolved that the first step in his redemption must be to ask the pardon of those who he'd hurt. In all his years, he'd never had to make an apology to anyone, because he never committed any ill to those around him; so what he was doing now felt awkward and uncomfortable. But deep down, he knew that it was the right thing to do, and now that he was unchained from his past with no small help from his Tanaar, he was determined to build his own legacy, a legacy of good.
Robert, the red-haired boy in Professor Helen's Tanaar group, and Daphne, the wheat-haired girl from Professor Thales's, exchanged an understanding glance. They were bandaged in the torso where Elwin had driven his hammer of water into them the day before; together, they appraised Elwin upon their bedside, his Quan gone and his body no longer carrying the berserk fury they recalled. They had not expected him to come.
"You came on your own volition?" asked Robert.
"Yes."
"Not by the order of the headmaster?"
"No."
There was no lie in Elwin's words; only humility.
"Elwin, I appreciate you for coming to us to apologize. Though I've been injured, I am not angry or incensed at you, because what's happened has happened, and I'm not supposed to be the authority to decide what you must do," stated Robert, understanding what it meant for Elwin's Quan to have been taken away. "I don't demand anything from you, only that you explain to us why you did what you did," he queried, enunciating his words with a stately clarion.
"I too won't demand of you," said Daphne, untangling her locks of wheat by the pillowcase. "But yes, we would like to hear why you did what you did – we're Artens of Aeternitas, and you are meant to be one of us."
Daphne's voice was tinged with sympathy; Robert nodded once.
Unclouded by his anger, Elwin explained in length of his past and the shadows that had haunted him. He did not curse or speak ill of Lucian, but only of his experiences with him; he explained clearly of his training with Professor Aionia, and how she not only helped him improve in the Arts, but also aided him in recognizing the wrong he held.
It was an hour until his explanation was complete.
"I see..." Daphne trailed off, recalling from Professor Thales that it was judicious to listen to more than one perspective of events. Her initial impression of Elwin had been set by Lucian at the beginning of their year, but now that she'd heard of Elwin's side of the story, realized that her impression was unjustly set.
Robert closed his eyes and breathed a long sigh. "It looks like we in our own selfishness turned a blind eye to your plight. It would have also been challenging for me to stand idly by when my integrity and that of my father was being insulted."
Elwin remained silent.
"But you could have challenged Lucian to a duel, you know?" remarked Robert, breaking the terse air with a degree of informality that made Elwin look up in surprise. "And not fisticuff it out in the dining hall of all places! It looked like you could have stood toe-to-toe with him. Duels are allowed, right? Would've saved you a lot of trouble," chuckled Robert.
"Yeah, or you could have just gone outside and found some woodblocks to perform the Dance of the Sparks again! That would've silenced Lucian really quickly," added Daphne.
Elwin almost smacked his head as to why he didn't think of those ideas earlier, and realized how powerful and consuming that thing called hate was, to be ensnared by it, to feel it for someone else. He would not fall to such impetuousness when he encountered Lucian again.
"I dived into stopping the fight even when I knew what could happen," laughed Robert, "so can't say I wasn't also a bit birdbrained there. Your hammer did hurt quite a bit." He still possessed the capacity for cheer after what had happened, and Elwin found himself taking a liking to the warmth of his character. "But I couldn't stand by and do nothing, you know?"
"I understand," said Elwin. "I should have stopped myself."
"The fault is also in us, too," consoled Daphne. "Headmaster Abraxas always told us that if we leave anyone behind, it's our fault. And it seems as though we've left you behind and cornered you without knowing it. We won't do the same again."
"You have my word," said Robert.
Elwin was taken aback by their hearts for him, even though it was he who had hurt them. He did not feel that he deserved such kindness. But this was what it meant to be an Arten of Aeternitas; to see beyond the well, to leave behind those fortresses of grievances and build bridges without hate. He found newfound respect for his peers and for the Academy itself. Memories surfaced to him of the exemplary conduct of Sandora and her crew back at the Marlin; looking back at it now, he should have expected it so. Now, his journey wouldn't all be about power – it would be about using his newfound power to become as honorable as they were.
"Thank you for accepting me. Although it will be hard, I promise to redeem myself to you and the Academy," assured Elwin, before taking his leave.
It was as if a veil draped over his eyes was lifted at last.
Before Professor Aionia lifted him out of that abyss, before she smote clean the chains that bound his soul, every person appeared to Elwin's eyes as if they were conspiring against him. He took the innocent smiles and laughter of his classmates as smiles of mockery and laughter at his expense, a harmless comment an accusation of his character, every word spoken a conspiracy behind his back, just as it was back then, just as it was at his old school.
The shadows he saw in other people were really his own shadow, a reflection of his primal fears, because all his life he'd pretended to be someone he could not be. He was mortally afraid of the vision he could never reach, and deeper than that, terrified of never finding the meaning of freedom. Every person who reminded him of his existence as an imposter was an enemy in that twilight; he locked himself away on an unassailable fortress and pushed his friends away, and attempted to do the same to his Tanaar, but despite it all, she reached out and grabbed his hand, to save him. And even when he expected those he'd hurt to lash out at him, to shun him away, they accepted and embraced him. To know that there were people who believed in him and trusted in him was like holding the very Sun in the palm of his hand. Color once returned to the world that Elwin knew.
But as it is with many things, it would be disingenuous to say that all of Elwin's problems magically disappeared. There were moments when the shadows of his past would once again coil to his throat and try to snare his mind when a word reminded him of his ordeals, where the world would flicker from color to gray, and innocent expressions twist to malevolent shades. But unlike before, where he was but a prisoner, he now had the tools to fight and rise above them. Despite his new resolve, Elwin also labored hard not to hate or condemn his past, for they were products of his circumstance; as much as it pained him, they were the roads that had taken him to the present. His Tanaar taught him that he must come to understand them more deeply if he could, so he could eventually neutralize their poisons and transform them into something that fuels his future instead; something that gives courage to himself and to others.
With his Tanaar's advice on his mind, he started his life at Aeternitas National Academy anew, determined to redeem himself.
Yet, just how he could redeem himself to everyone, he did not know.
***
"What's going on?"
"I don't know –"
"Let me look!"
It had been roughly a week since Elwin's new endeavor.
A huge throng of Fradihta and upperclassmen were gathered in a circle on the green, sunlit quadrangle of the southern campus quartier. Many talked in hushed whispers and others rather aloud; on regular academy days, such many Artens were seldom gathered like this. Clearly, there was something noteworthy.
Elwin gently pushed his way forward to the inner rim of the circle to see the subject of the commotion for himself.
In the center of the clearing he saw an old man, impeccably dressed in a rich suit of burgundy and white, with swept-back hair of gray, which from its lingering hues must've once taken on a shade of plum. His beard was beginning to turn silver with age, but his eyes and face betrayed no feebleness – he carried no cane and leaned on no staff, and stood with great dignity like a monolith towering above reeds. Elwin found himself unable to approach any further, apprehensive of how the figure would react. The only other person at Aeternitas who radiated such presence was the headmaster himself, but this wasn't him, so who was this?
And that's when Elwin saw a familiar face, standing off against this figure near the inner rim of the clearing. It was Katherine, and Elwin was glad to see her again; but he realized at once something was terribly wrong. On her face was an expression that he'd never once seen during their time as the kismets.
It was fear.
"I shall not return with you, father. My place is here at Aeternitas," Katherine spoke, her voice tough yet wavering underneath.
"Your place is with us at the Heriz estate. You will return with me on the skyliner and resume your studies at home."
He answered with such fierce assuredness that Elwin felt his head swim, imagining himself in Katherine's place. It was one thing to see a famous figure here at Aeternitas, but Alexander Heriz of all people, an Archon of industry, here and now?
And he was demanding Katherine return home? What was happening?
Elwin saw Katherine flinch at the words of her father, spoken not as a request but as a command. But she wasn't giving up yet.
"Why, father? Why of all times and places must I return with you now? You've given me your full consent of my admission to Aeternitas, to become the champion of our Republics. You signed Headmaster Abraxas's letter, and gave me your blessings."
"I signed it because I knew Aeternitas was safe," he replied, gesturing his hand to sweep away the air. A strong gust of cut grass blew on the Artens and swept their robes.
"But times have changed. You are safe no longer, not here at Aeternitas. The more you stay, the more you shall be in danger."
"So what do you suggest, father? That we run and hide despite holding up the entirety of the Republics with our industrial might?" She gestured to the people around her. "You ask me to abandon Aeternitas, abandon the knowledge and solidarity needed to run our mighty enterprise! What would my friends think of the name Heriz that we should withdraw with such cowardice?" Katherine parried her father's command with fierce determination. But Elwin knew all too well in the minute dissonance of her pronunciations: she had come to love Aeternitas and was terrified to abandon it. She could only appeal to her father by proving that she was the scion of the name Heriz, that she needed Aeternitas for only that reason, but her shoulders betrayed all the weight upon them. Despite being a billionaire's child, she had the fewest freedoms out of all.
Archon Alexander Heriz answered solemnly in turn, unfazed.
"It is possible to learn of these things through home tutoring. I have also brought you to many of our republics in the past so you could witness how industry is maintained. Think to yourself: Aeternitas is not the only place where you can learn these things!"
His voice possessed an altogether different quality from the headmaster's. If Headmaster Abraxas's words sounded like peals of volcanic thunder, Archon Heriz's were undulations of a far-reaching earthquake. His eyes were colored deep maroon, but were almost luminescent, radiant, seeming only to reveal a small hint of the vast intellect behind the man who forged and maintained an empire of industry throughout one of the most turbulent times in republican history.
"In light of recent happenings, in light of being your father, I shall not, no, I cannot let you stay here. Katherine, my daughter, return with me. Worry not the people you leave behind, for without you our family cannot continue," he spoke, gesturing curtly to the crowd. To him, even the best Artens of Aeternitas meant little in light of his cherished daughter.
"What 'recent happenings,' father?"
Just then, an interruption was heard among the crowd of Artens, and it parted like a sea to let a familiar face through.
Professor Aionia marched into the clearing, her snowy cape billowing beside her floating golden staff, the wave of Artens closing behind her wake.
"I've been made aware of a noteworthy visit to our Academy," she said, walking towards the magnate to offer her hand. "It is an honor to extend my sincere welcome."
Though Professor Aionia was the most warm-hearted out of all the professors Elwin knew, her presence was always accompanied by a sort of stern poise that made many shrink in deference, especially those who found themselves without commensurate composure. So the fact that the Archon stood where he stood and let Professor Aionia approach him sank Elwin's heart: it was not going to go the way Katherine wished.
"Ar. Alexander Heriz, may I enquire as to the purpose of your grace?"