If you were to ask me, "Kiriya, what do you think is the most important part about high school life," I'd probably exclaim, "What the hell are you doing in my shower?! I'm calling the police!"
Because no one sees me naked without giving me at least 20 dollars and a can of Coke.
{...}
[...]
Hey! Don't look at me like that. 20 dollars is 20 dollars!
When I'm not dealing with unexpected intruders, I'd say, "Getting contact information and making quick friends." That way you won't be lonely.
Anyway, back to reality...
After the introductions were finally over, I decided to take the initiative and gather contact information from people who seemed less likely to break into my house. You know, having friends who respect personal boundaries is pretty high on my list of priorities.
"Ayanokouji-kun?" I called out, directing my attention to the socially challenged guy who gave a rather lacklustre introduction. He looked at me with a hint of surprise, a glimmer of hope shining through his stoic demeanour.
Ah, the socially awkward ones – they're like uncut gems waiting to be polished into the funniest types of idiots.
I pulled out my phone and opened my contacts list. "Congratulations, Ayanokouji Kiyotaka-kun, you're about to become my very first contact in this school," I announced with a playful grin.
His expression, if it could change, would probably resemble a deer caught in headlights. In other words, he froze on the spot, utterly baffled by my sudden interest in him.
"Uh...sure..." Ah, the sweet sound of pity~. I couldn't help but find his social discomfort somewhat endearing.
We swapped contact information, and I couldn't resist glancing at his profile picture. Ever seen those tech-illiterate middle-aged "people" on Facebook who have that very awkward aura in their selfies?
Well, his profile picture is kind of like that.
He's sitting on a couch of sorts, gazing downward with those golden-brown eyes, looking completely out of his element. I mean, I suppose it's somewhat endearing in its own way...?
"Thank you, Ayanokouji-kun," I chimed, genuinely grateful. "Hey, if you're up for it, you can join me." I motioned toward the group of students huddled around the front of the class, mostly comprising the female population of the class, who were bunching around Hirata. "I'm planning to gather contact information from a few people. You should do the same."
I've read Harem manga before, I think Hirata would make a good protagonist. I silently thanked everyone for not bunching around me.
It was either because I was in the back of the class, and they were embarrassed to come up to me, or it was because I was in the back of the class and they were embarrassed to come up to me.
I think it was because I was in the back of the class and they were embarrassed to come up to me.
It's not that I'm looking down on this socially challenged...thing...mind you. He just struck me as someone who might be a bit rusty in the social department, as if he'd been in hibernation without human interaction for the past three years or so.
"Ah...are you sure...?" he hesitated, his voice tinged with uncertainty.
"Absolutely! Come on, don't worry. Even if your introduction was a bit...bad...you've got a chance to make a better impression now," I reassured him with an encouraging smile. At that moment, I had officially taken on the role of his social guide.
AKA, I adopted him.
You see, dear readers, when an extrovert crosses paths with an introvert, the extrovert instinctively adopts the introvert – it's just the unwritten law of the social jungle. I don't make the rules; I just follow them!
The two of us strolled toward the front of the class, where everyone was gathering into their slowly forming cliques. If I were to choose which group I wanted to be in, it would be the popular kids, I guess.
I mean, who doesn't love being at the top of the social ladder?
We first went toward Kushida's group. The beige-haired girl waved at us to come over. "Fujiwara-kun, come over! Inogashira-chan was just talking about you!"
"Kushida-chan!" the girl cried out, flushing red. "You said you wouldn't say anything!"
"Hehe~"
I tilted my head with a smirk. "Really? You guys were talking about me?"
"W-well, we were talking about how the questions you asked sensei..." She sheepishly said, but the other girls gave her a smug glance. There was something other than that, but I wasn't going to tease her about it.
I blinked. "Oh? Which part of it?"
A girl, Nene Mori, dramatically slammed her hands on a nearby desk. "What's your type!?" She declared, staring at me with intensity.
"Oh? Is this about me asking sensei out on a date?" I chuckled.
"Yes!"
I thought about the question for a bit. "Well, I was just messing around. And if I were to say my type...I would say..." I then made a face, scrunching up my face a bit. "People I find attractive!" I exclaimed.
"Huh?"
"Ehh...?"
"That doesn't narrow it down at all! Gimme the details!" Mori, undeterred and bold, demanded.
I giggled. "But where's the fun in that? How about we play a game? We exchange numbers, and you try and find out what my type is?" I grinned.
"Deal!" The two of us shook hands.
"I'm up for that!"
"C-can I play too?" Oh, you poor summer soul Inogashira.
I interjected, though before we could get to exchanging numbers. "But my one—actually two conditions are this. 1: No stalking and 2: You have to get Ayanokouji-kun's number too!" I chirped.
The brown-haired boy's eyes widened for a fraction of a second. "Wait, Fujiwara. Do I even get a say in this?"
I smiled, holding up a finger. "I'm not leaving anyone alone, Ayanokouji-kun. This is your chance to live a good high school life! So, what do you say?"
"A-ah...sure."
A seemingly surprised Ayanokouji Kiyotaka stuttered.
"Great! Let's all exchange numbers and make great memories with one another!" Kushida chimed.
"Chooottooo maaaatteee!" A voice came up from behind us as we were putting our contact information into each other's phones. "You're not actually going to leave me out of this, are you?"
That is Karuizawa Kei, one of the aforementioned "Important People" that I want to keep an eye on. She came up to our group with confidence in her stride.
Karuizawa marched up to me, only me, and handed me a piece of paper. "That's my contact information. We should hang out sometime, you know?" She said while batting her eyelashes a bit.
There were soft gasps that came across the class at her bold declaration. Of course, I knew what that meant, since I am a master at social interaction. I am not a NEET!
Taken aback, I balked. "Uh...yeah, sure...Could you also give it to Ayanokouji-kun, too?"
"Huh? Why should I? Is he your friend or something?"
I chuckled nervously. "You could say that."
Karuizawa gave me a smug look. "Fine. But only because you asked." She relented in a sort of sing-song tone. Ayanokouji looked way more than taken aback as if his little heartless heart couldn't take the attention—
Crack!
Huh?
A sudden shift in the atmosphere happened, and almost every girl was staring at Ayanokouji like he was prey. If they wanted to get to me, they would have to go through him. That thought was going through their minds.
I had unintentionally made him the middleman for all of the thirsty girls in my class. The key word here is unintentionally!
(I don't know if I'm lying or not!)
"Hey! Ayanokouji-kun!"
"Ayanokouji-kun! Gimme your contact info!"
Soon enough, they were on him, leaving me, Hirata and Kushida staring in wonder and concern.
"Kushida-san."
"Yes?"
"I'm going to leave before they devour me. Can you hold them off for me?"
She giggled before standing at attention, like a soldier. "Leave them to me, Fujiwara-kun!"
Hirata chuckled nervously. We had exchanged contacts before the frenzy. "Stay safe, Fujiwara-kun—H-how about we give Ayanokouji-kun some space?" He went into the middle of the mosh pit, trying to save the brown-haired boy.
Now, my dear readers. Imagine Ayanokouji being swarmed by women. Seems familiar, right?
Tehee~!
I swear I could hear a little 'Save me'
"Thank you so much!" I beamed before bolting out of the classroom.
I had gotten a large portion of the class's contact information in less than 20 minutes—a majority—actually almost all of them being girls. Scratch that, Hirata and Ayanokouji are the only boys in my contacts; whoops.
Now, I'll admit, I do feel like a bit of an ass for leaving poor Ayanokouji to navigate the social waters on his own.
It's like abandoning a child at the supermarket or your dad saying that he's going out for milk and then never seeing him again.
But hey, tough love builds character, right?
He's got to learn the ropes sooner or later!
I could practically see his self-esteem taking a nosedive, though. Oh well, nothing a little social interaction won't fix...hopefully.
So, no hard feelings, my fledgling friend! Just remember, you're like a social caterpillar now, weaving your cocoon of social skills. And who knows, maybe one day, you'll emerge as a beautiful, confident butterfly – probably!
And heck, maybe you'll even surpass me!
...
Now to find more cameras...
...
I roamed the campus, my curiosity leading me to explore the school's surroundings. However, what caught my attention was the sheer number of cameras that seemed to be everywhere. It was like a scene from one of those dystopian novels where the world is a surveillance nightmare, and even the privacy of your bathroom isn't safe.
Do you ever get that eerie feeling, like Big Brother is watching your every move? Well, that's exactly how I felt as I counted the damn cameras dotting the landscape.
I couldn't help but remember those scenes from those dystopian novels, where every corner was under constant watch. It's like they took a page out of those stories and brought it to life.
But seriously, who in their right mind installs around 194 cameras all over the school grounds? I mean, sure, security is important, and I'm all for it, but this just feels way over the top. Like, what the FUCK?!
Now, I'm not saying I'm paranoid or anything... okay, maybe I am a little paranoid.
I mean, who wouldn't be, knowing they're being watched all the time? Imagine being caught on camera during the most private moments – like when you're using the bathroom or having a cozy Netflix and chill session.
...
"Kyun❤️ Kyun Ah ❤️ Kir- ❤️ - iya❤️ !!!"
"Can you two be quiet!?"
"Sorry sensei!"
"S-sorry sense-HYA ❤️ ! Hurn ❤️ ! N-not there❤️! A-ah mmph ❤️~"
YOU GET WHAT I'M SAYING!? I HAD TO MAKE MYSELF FUCK SOMEONE TO GET MY POINT ACROSS!
♔ 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐅𝐨𝐨𝐥𝐬 𝐌𝐚𝐭𝐞 ♔
With my priorities straight and my manly needs in mind, I decided to pay a visit to the convenience store.
You know, to pick up some essentials like a 2-in-1 shampoo and conditioner that promises to keep your scalp hydrated but ends up leaving it drier than the Sahara.
And hey, maybe a razor and some shaving cream, because nothing says "I've got my life together" like a clean-shaven face.
Or at least that's what I like to tell myself.
Oh, don't give me that judgmental look!
I do shower daily, I promise.
I'll literally fucking punt your dumbass if you give me that look!
Speaking of convenience stores, have you ever been to Family Mart? They're like a treasure trove of culinary delights. I mean, where else can you find Michelin-worthy food right next to the candy aisle? It's like a gourmet paradise, tucked away in those tiny aisles.
Anyway, enough of my rants about food and daydreams of instant ramen. As I approached the convenience store, I could practically smell the tantalizing aroma of delicious snacks and ready-to-eat meals wafting through the air.
It was like a siren's call, pulling me closer and closer to the doors of convenience store heaven.
Oh, hey, it's that red-haired guy from the morning! And Ayanokouji! He looks...dead inside for some reason. I wonder why?
(I'm lying. I know exactly why.)
Horikita! She looks as annoyed as ever! Oh, she's leaving...heh...
I slowly walked over.
"Hey, you guys first years? This is our spot," As I was approaching the convenience store, a few senpais were confronting the red-haired guy from my class and Ayanokouji.
Oh, dear...
Well, you see, if you paid attention to the last entry, you all know I'm not the fondest of Senpais walking over me.
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
I just find it somewhat annoying, them flaunting their power like they're some sort of monkey with the coolest fangs.
"Who are you? I was already here. You're in the way, get lost." the red-haired guy barked.
"You hear this guy? 'Get lost,' he says. What a cocky little first-year punk." said one of them.
The three senpai's laughed in the red-haired's face. He shot up, slamming the noodle cup he was holding against the ground. Noodles and broth splashing around.
"Hey! What the hell are you doing?!"
"'First-year punk, huh? You tryna' make fun of me, huh?!"
From what I could observe from the morning and now, this guy had an incredibly short fuse. I mean, he got angry after being told to introduce himself, and even now. He seemed the type to threaten anyone who crossed him.
"You're awfully mouthy, considering we're second-year students. We already put our bags here, see?"
With a plop, the second-year students put their bags down and guffawed quite loudly.
I slowly approached behind my classmates, I really didn't wanna get involved, though I did observe from afar.
(I'm lying. I want to get involved)
"See, our stuff's here. Now, beat it," one of them said.
"You've got a lot of guts, asshole!" barked the red-haired guy once again.
"Oh, wow, scary. What class are you in? Wait, never mind. I think I know. You're in class D aren't you?" the senpais were provoking my red-haired classmate and they most likely would've gone farther if it weren't for Ayanokouji's presence.
Sigh...why not give it a shot...?
"Yeah so wh-?!" I stopped my classmate, placing a hand on his shoulder, though it was a bit strange, considering he was taller than me.
"Ma~ Ma, senpai, what's it to you? If he, or we, are in class D?" I gestured toward the, now 3 of us.
Everyone was a bit surprised at my sudden appearance, I mean, it was like a magic trick, but with me serving as the magic guy, you know?
"Ha! You hear that everyone," the lead senpai turned toward his friends. "They're in class D! I knew it! It was a dead giveaway!"
"Ehhh~" I drawled out, still smiling.
"Huh? Are you laughing at us?"
I tilted my head, giving them a look of pity. "No, no I'm not laughing, I'm just sighing at the fact that it took you that long to figure out," I pointed to my classmate, then Ayanokouji, then me. "what class we were in," I spoke as if talking to children.
"I mean," I started clapping, smiling while doing so. "It only took you so long, no?"
"Huh!? Quit messing around you stupid defec—" I cut him off.
"Oya? You said something senpai~?" I gave a playful lilt, drawing in closer toward the group. "You're a bit too quiet, and I don't have the greatest of hearing, you'll have to speak up,"
"You think you're some sort of big shot huh, pretty boy?! Wait 'till-"
"Oh dear, I am quite the looker, huh senpai? Given your looks, you're around...Class C, no?" I narrowed my eyes, grinning while doing so. "I'm sorry, though, I only know how to swing in a few ways, not this type," I provoked lowly.
The senpais were a bit flustered and angry, more on the angry side, if I say so myself.
"You asshole!" one of the students raised their hands, clenching them into fists.
"Awe~ Sempwai angy? Perhaps angsty? Did widdle ole me wuffle up your jimmies? Your widdle kohai is pretty right? Why don't you take a good look at me, huh?" Some people have fragile egos, mostly idiots, and well, you get the picture.
"You are kind of pathetic, in all honesty, going for the freshmen. No, wait, you're just pathetic in general, didn't even rank up once, huh?" I was just messing with them at this point.
"You little shit!" The senpai with clenched fists suddenly surged forward, faster than anticipated and socked me square in the jaw.
THUD!
A surge of pain on the left side of my face became apparent as I fell to the ground, wide-eyed.
My red-haired classmate got in front of me defensively as Ayanokouji came to my aid. "What the hell do you think you're doing?!"
"Are you alright?" Ayanokouji checked up on me, crouching. I sloshed my tongue around my mouth.
"Yeah, I'm fine," I said quietly, he nodded.
The senpai's two friends suddenly became...oddly paranoid, for some reason. There were cameras around this area, like all of the other places around campus. There was one specifically above us.
"This school monitors bullying very carefully." Were the words of Chabashira-sensei and I'm fairly sure socking me in the mouth counts as bullying.
"Oi! Let's move, this is bad!" one of them grabbed my attacker and took off while chastising him.
"You're gonna regret this, you damn defects!" the aggressor who threw the punch yelled angrily. "Keep yapping like that and you'll find yourself in hell soon!"
"Oi! Don't just run away! Hey!" my fiery-haired classmate shouted at them.
"Don't," I interjected.
"You alright?" he asked.
I hummed in response. "I got a nice punch to the jaw, but I'll survive. No worries."
My classmate snorted. "Really? Just making sure."
You know, despite his anger management issues and tough exterior, this guy's not that bad. And it's probably time I stopped referring to him as "red-haired classmate" or "my classmate." I should have learned his name already!
"By the way, I never got your name," I said, trying to break the ice.
"Oh, right. It's Sudo," he replied, offering me a hand to help me up.
"Nice to meet you, Sudo." I said as I stretched my limbs.
Sudo was still seething with anger, like a boiling kettle ready to explode. Understandable, though. If I saw a random classmate getting punched for defending me, I'd be pretty ticked off too – unless, of course, I was the one getting punched.
"You should've let me at 'em I could've taught them a lesson!" He sneered.
"You could have, but I wouldn't want you to get in trouble."
"Huh? What the hell are you talking about man?"
"I mean...if you got into a fight on the first day, it would be bad, I think." I lightly chuckled, Sudo following a bit after.
He cooled down a bit after our conversation, but there was still an edge of irritation in his demeanour.
I swished my tongue around in my mouth to check the damage, the pain fading. Then I glanced at the mess around us. Noodles and trash were scattered everywhere, creating an unsightly scene.
"We should probably..." I started.
Sudo looked a tad embarrassed. "Ah, yeah... whoops... let's clean up."
With a mutual nod, the three of us – Ayanokouji, Sudo, and I – worked together to tidy up the mess. We gathered all the discarded food and trash and dumped it into a nearby bin.
When we were finally done, we let out sighs of relief. Our hands were a bit sticky from handling the mess, and personally, I can't stand unclean spaces. It just gives me the creeps, you know?
"Oh!" Sudo suddenly exclaimed, realization dawning on him. "I never got your name."
"Fujiwara," I responded, lips curving into a simple smile. Sudo, for all his faults, wasn't a bad guy deep down. He was just a bit of a reckless dumbass who managed to land himself in situations like this.
We exchanged contact numbers before he headed off toward the dorms.
That left Ayanokouji and me standing in front of the convenience store.
"..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
And the awkward silence stretched on for about a minute.
"Why did you leave me?" Ayanokouji suddenly broke the silence, his tone carrying a hint of hurt.
"Gnh!"
Well, now I look like an asshole, huh?
"W-well, Ayanokouji-kun got a bunch of people's contact information, right? S-so..." I could feel him drilling a hole into my soul the more I spoke.
He just sighed. "I did. But isn't it a bit cruel to leave me alone with them? I was terrified."
I sweated nervously. "I apologize; that won't happen again!"
Ayanokouji hummed. "Are you going to buy something?"
"Yeah, I just came from a shopping trip; I'm just going to get some instant noodles or something in there," I pointed to the convenience store.
"I see. I'll see you tomorrow then."
I smiled. "Of course! I'll see you soon!"
The two of us separated, one to the dorms, the other inside the store.
Hey...
100,000 times 12 times 3 equals 3,600,000, right? Minus expenses and other things... That should round to around 2,500,000 points, right? That's if they've only spent 30% of their allowance each month, though.
A normal Japanese allowance is 10,000 to 15,000 yen... But... huh...
Ding!
I entered the convenience store, the distinctive welcome bell ringing through my ears.
"Welcome!"
Whatever, I'll check later. I have time...
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