An anguished cry tore out of her throat as pain seared the lower part of her belly. Her maidenhead gave way with a burning sensation.
He is going to kill me, she thought.
Hegi had taught her all that the king would do once she officially became his concubine. As someone with no experience in the matter at all, he had only informed her based on the stories he heard from the knights when they boasted about their sexual conquests. What little he could garner from the women serving as servants made him offer her conflicting lessons about the act of sexual relations. But none of the stories he told her warned her of the immense pain.
Vallezarii didn't seem to notice her discomfort. Even if he did, Mare did not delude herself into thinking that he would stop for her sake and ask if she found comfort in it. If anything he would seek to hurt her more and she would not give him that satisfaction of knowing that his intrusion into her body ached like hell's fork in her back.
So she bit her bottom lip, chomping it so tight that the pain overrode her discomfort and blood stained her teeth.
Vallezarii's grunt filled her ears, though he was still clad in his royal robes, as was she in her kirtle, she felt his heart pounding against her chest. His strong hairy thighs scraped the sensitive skin of her thighs. She hadn't known what to expect but he was not the flabby king she had expected him to be. His body was muscle-packed, a testament to years spent on horseback, swinging swords and conquering enemies.
His strong calf nudged hers aside and when he went particularly deep she thought she was going to die.
Thankfully, he shuddered and she felt him jerk inside her body. Warmth flooded her legs and he stopped moving.
He lifted himself on his hands to glare into her face and with lips curled in disgust said, "You do not just lie there like a sack of barley!" Huffing in even more disgust he withdrew from her, adjusted his robe, and growled, "Get out!"
She rose on her elbow and was horrified to see that the warmth flooding her legs was her own dark red blood. The urge to vomit was quickly tamped down. With what little dignity she had left she tried to stand up but soon realized how impossible that feat was. Her legs shook terribly and she feared she would not be able to walk again with the painful ache that thudded between her legs.
But she tried. Sucking her lips in, she tried and was making progress lifting her battered ass off the bed when Vallezarii grabbed her roughly by the arm and yanked her off the bed to the floor forgetting that her collar was still attached to the bedpost. That action only caused it to tighten, almost snuffing the life out of her even before she hit the stone floor. Cursing under his breath he released the collar from around her throat and threw it across the room before yanking her by her arms across the room to the front of the door where he called for Hegi.
No, Mare begged silently under her breath. Don't take it off. Let it kill me and end my life.
Hegi rushed in. "My lord?"
"Get her out of my sight and tutor her better on her duties!" he roared before shutting the door in both their faces.
Hegi looked down at Mare's pathetic state. He reached a hand down to help her and watched in surprise as she ignored his hand and pushed herself up. Her eyes were hard amber stones.
Even though her legs shook and nearly bucked under her she gripped the wall for support and started to walk away.
Hegi reached out for her again but the look in her eyes stopped him in his tracks and he withdrew his hands.
Mare walked – or rather she hobbled, aware of the eyes of the servants, the soldiers guarding the halls on her. They didn't avert their gaze as they watched her drag her broken body, leaving a trail of blood as she went, they didn't offer a hand but she knew that they mocked her situation. She didn't care. They wouldn't be mocking her if she had succeeded with her mission three months ago. They wouldn't have to mock her if she had the king's head in her hands.
Her body was broken, her pride was hurt but her heart was made of steel. Her father always said it would be the death of her. So be it. But she would die and drag the souls of every member of the royal house with her.
She got to her chambers and sagged against the door. A cynical laugh escaped her.
There was no humor to be found in her situation but she laughed anyway because she could picture herself standing over Vallezarii's body, holding the dagger against his throat. She could already feel his blood splashing on her face, her body. Her insides clenched with excitement. A breath later she slumped against the door and fainted.
Hegi, against his better judgment, rushed forward to lift her so that he could carry her inside the chambers. The bleeding had slowed to a trickle now. The girl was stubborn to a fault but not even he could bear to see her die as a result of her stubbornness.
With his arm under hers, he carried her to the bed, raising her knees before hurrying to get a wet cloth for her head. She opened her eyes then and looked at him.
"You must rest, my lady," I will check your injuries.
He went and brought his basket of stale unguents and ointment and herbs. When he lifted up her kirtle to her bended knees his face paled.
She would need stitches.
He threaded a wooden needle, sharpened to a fine point. "This will hurt my lady, but I can give you something to lessen the pain…"
"No. Make it hurt," she spoke under her breath.
His breath caught but he did as she asked. He cleaned her up so that he could stitch her, changing the water twice when it turned red and murky, and when he sank the needle into her flesh she didn't make a sound or flinch.
Hegi worked wordlessly. When he looked up he found her watching him differently.
"What is it, my lady?"
"Are slaves referred to as 'my lady?' Do you accord the title for nobles to slaves?"
He didn't have an answer for that. "Your wounds are closed now."
When he finished with her he applied his ointment and gave her something to drink. She refused it. When he left the room he looked back to find her staring at the ceiling, her eyes drifting close.
Mare barely heard the soft click of the doors closing. Whatever ointment he put on her was burning the pain away gradually. The cool, soothing ointment lulled her to a sleep full of dreams that would make the devil himself proud.
When she awoke the clouds had darkened, and the curtains were parted to let the evening breeze in. She shivered, her body feverish.
She caught a whiff of food Hegi must have left beside her bed.
But she realized that it wasn't the food that had caused her to wake. The room was pitch black but she sensed another presence there with her. Turning her head to the side she saw the figure standing by the door, watching.
A head full of cascading blonde hair, the broad shoulders of youth and the stance of royalty. He stood there watching her wordlessly.
After a while, he left without a word and closed the door.
Mare frowned.