Chapter 15 Dylan
As my father named me the new Alpha, bowing ever so slightly to honor my new position as pack leader, my wolf growled with gratification. I was the Alpha of Starsmoon.
I turned to survey my pack from the stage, and a wave of applause erupted from the crowd. The happy, smiling faces looking up at me made my beast rumble again. I felt a surge of protectiveness steal through me as I contemplated them. I would always do what was right for them. I felt that certainty sink into my bones and settle into my marrow.
My pack.
As my gaze wandered the crowd, they tracked over the faces and forms in search of what would complete my ascension to Alphahood. When my eyes eventually stopped on Cherry's form, draped in a soft pink dress, the color of cherry blossoms, I thought with fondness, my wolf rumbled with want. Anger bristled in me, too, as I noticed she'd positioned herself at the back of the room as if she wasn't important. Well, soon, I resolved with renewed confidence she wouldn't be anywhere but in the place of honor: at my side.
My father gestured to the pack, inviting them all to be seated again.
As I admired Cherry's pale heart-shaped face, the porcelain skin of her shoulders and arms, my wolf's hunger grew, and I knew with certainty that my love for her wasn't something I could fight anymore. It was something
that I was meant to submit to. The only thing as Alpha that I ever intended to submit to from now on.
My father's voice reverberated from beside me on the stage, "After the joyful ascension of my son to Alpha, I am happy to announce that he will shortly be marrying his mate, Lucy, and the Starsmoon Pack will once more be carried into the future under the protection of an Alpha and Luna."
I felt my wolf seize control of me. Since being named Alpha, it has dominated me even more. And it knew what was best for me. And for the pack. On an instinctual level, it understood what we needed. Lucy might be the daughter of an Alpha, and her bloodline, the ability to produce a powerful heir, but she wasn't my mate. The pack would only be truly strong if we followed the true will of Nuu-Chah. As Alpha, the Moon God's guidance had cut through my uncertainty as surely as a full moon the darkness. I suddenly understood how vital it was that I sated my wolf and me. My pack and I would only be strong if I claimed the mate and Luna I'd always been destined to have.
Cherry.
My shoulders stiffened as I turned to my father. "My relationship with Lucy is unstable. We need to talk about the future Luna of the pack more, Father," I declared, a new level of confidence coating my every word. I was the Alpha of Starsmoon. My father had to yield to my command now.
My father's face grew livid. "You will do your duty to your pack, Dylan." The temper in his tone only made my blood boil.
I tensed my jaw, balling my hands up to maintain the fury of my wolf that felt rabid at my father's command. "I will not marry Lucy."
I'd vaguely noticed Lucy in the front row, near Bert, but I couldn't find it in myself to care about her reaction to my outburst. I knew that while Lucy found me and my status attractive, she wasn't any more in love with me than I was with her. I'd glimpsed her self-satisfied look in the front row as my Alphahood was announced. My plain talking wouldn't be in danger of hurting her heart, only her pride.
To my left, my mother tried to pacify me with her gentler tone, "Dylan, love–"
But I silenced her with a firm stare and then turned my gaze back to the pack. My eyes clamped onto Cherry's silver gaze, demanding her to remain where she was, even as she stilled with alertness. The same alertness she'd shown in my mom's workroom as I'd tried to confess my feelings to her. But I wouldn't be subdued this time. I had waited too long to talk to my mate and to tell her how I felt. I wasn't going to wait one damn minute longer.
That desire drove my every move as I strode down the aisle, lunging past our pack members to where Cherry now stood. Most of the pack were on their feet too, but I didn't care about the commotion I'd caused. I only had eyes for my mate. Grasping her hand, I pulled Cherry towards the back of the room and onto the balcony. The rush of the breeze across my face was welcome after the stifling warmth and tension of the room we'd just left.
Taking Cherry in my arms, my mouth dipped to hers, and I couldn't resist kissing her.
My wolf growled in triumph as she kissed me back. Her tongue answered mine, and I explored her delectable mouth. Her lips grazed me with a
hunger that matched my own, and it was with deep regret that I finally drew back.
The look of desire in her hooded eyes and the beautiful flush across her porcelain skin almost had me plundering her mouth again. A deep satisfaction roiled through me as I anticipated what true fulfillment would feel like with my mate at my side every day and in my bed every night.
But I forced myself to stop kissing her long enough to tell her what I should have done seven years ago. I kept my hands on her waist, still needing to feel her. "You are my Luna. You always have been. You're meant to be at my side. I know it with everything I am." My dark eyes captured her stare as a flicker of uncertainty moved through it. My voice gentled, "You don't need to be afraid. I promise this time, Cherry, I'll treat you as you deserve."
I felt her tremble beneath my touch, and I sought to comfort her. "Cherry, whatever's wrong, we'll talk about it. Please, trust me."
But she shook her head. "Dylan, I can't…"
Regret for how I'd hurt her in the past needled through me. If I'd only nurtured the bond with my mate as I should have, she wouldn't be distrustful of me now. Her words contradicted what her kiss had told me: she was attracted to me. I thought of what she'd told me about her life, saying she was happy with her work. Was it simply the fear of losing what she'd worked so hard to achieve?
I searched her face. "Listen, I know what you've accomplished away from the pack, and I'd never want to take that away from you. You know we have fashion designers in Seattle, too, right?" I tried to inject some levity into our
exchange as it was clear she was suffocating beneath whatever worries plagued her.
But her anxious expression didn't change. But I refused to be defeated, reminding myself that I'd tasted the hunger in her kiss. I'd sensed that her wolf wanted mine as desperately as mine did hers. It wasn't my wolf that she was afraid of; whatever worries she had were something else. Besides, the deeper instinctual urge I felt from my wolf as Alpha gave me more insight into Nuu-Chah's will, and it sang of how Cherry and I were fated mates. We had always been. And would always be.
"You're my mate, Cherry," I tried again, grasping her waist harder, wanting nothing more than for her to acknowledge that too. We belonged together. As my hands clutched at her, I felt my wolf stir as it had the night I'd claimed her. She was mine.
"I told you before; I can't be your mate."
Her words were like claws cleaving my chest open. Why did she look like her heart was breaking when she was the one shattering mine?
Again.
The broken pieces she'd left seven years ago, which had scarred over and healed imperfectly, imploded in my chest.
Feeling hollowed out, my hands slipped from her waist, even as my wolf howled mournfully inside. With one last devastated look, Cherry turned away, fleeing back into the reception room.
My mind kept cycling over her words, trying to make sense of her rejection, but everything within me kept returning to her heated kiss and the humming
satisfaction I sensed from her wolf. I couldn't fathom what had just happened. Why had she rejected me again?
My weary gaze fell upon the bar that had been set up out here on the balcony. Clearly, for celebratory drinks after my ascension ceremony, but it was a commiseration drink I needed now—a long one. I strode over to the table, picked up a bottle of red wine, and a sense of Deja-vu rippled over me. I thought of how familiar this chain of events seemed. Why did it feel as if my Luna was determined to destroy me when all I wanted to do was love her?
With a bitter toast to my mate, I raised the bottle and swigged. As the wine soured on my tongue, my thoughts darkened. The first act my pack had witnessed me try to accomplish, to claim my mate, had failed. But then, Cherry's sincere voice haunted me: "The fact that you're putting the pack first, Dylan, shows what an amazing Alpha you'll be."
Her words burned like the wine that hit the back of my throat. But I thought again of how my connection to the Moon God had deepened since ascending to the Alphahood and imagined telling Cherry again that the pack's and my needs were the same: we needed her. And God damn it, I didn't know how yet, but I was going to prove it to her.
But right now, I downed the bitter liquid, praying for a speedy deliverance into oblivion.