Chapter 30 - Mindblowing

Sophia's world seemed to melt away. Her doubts were erased and all that was left was a man named Luca Morelli who was taking her breath away with only a kiss. 

At least, it started with a kiss.

It was innocent until she felt herself go on autopilot. Her arms went around his neck and his large hands found her hips. 

She told herself she was just testing the water and would be able to stop herself, but she was drunk on the taste of his mouth as her tongue found his. It was like someone who wasn't her was controlling her and she couldn't get enough of their closeness as her knees squeezed at his sides and one of her feet made its way around his leg. 

She pulled away to catch her breath but his adept lips didn't stop and she felt his nose and mouth press against her neck. Her heart fluttered at the new sensation. 

When he first came into her room, she could only smell his familiar fresh scent but it escalated the moment their lips met. It seemed to get worse as he tasted her skin. It became potent with each sigh that escaped his lips.

He held her tighter as he breathed her in. The sweet smell that emanated from her was causing him to lose his mind. He could feel a shift within himself. What he promised before was lost to the animalistic desire within him. 

"Luca," she gasped, feeling his teeth graze against one of her collarbones. 

Even if he didn't remember who he was, he certainly had experience that was showing in the way he was electrifying her whole body.

However, for Luca, as his teeth met her pale skin, he had a flash of remembering something. His body was reacting to her but his overactive brain was trying to resist her at all costs. There was a war raging inside of him telling him to bite her and a shred of decency left that begged himself not to hurt her. 

Sophia was dizzy. She had been in pain before after all the stress she had been under that evening but he was calming her down. She wondered if they were just compatible with one another or if he was simply experienced enough to know what to do. 

Before she realized it, it became all too evident that she was behaving in a way that made it seem like she wanted to sleep with him. 

Her hands had migrated to his hair, being mindful of his staples, and, with each movement of his mouth against her skin, she held his hair just a little bit tighter, silently begging for him to go further. 

It wasn't until his hands were on either side of her breasts that she realized she shouldn't lead him on too much. It was clear he was into it. He was acting accordingly with her responses. 

Suddenly, Sophia let go of his hair and, before he realized it, she escaped his grasp, scooting backward on her bed until her back was against her pillows. 

"Sophia," he grumbled. 

In the darkness of her room, his eyes on her seemed predatory and wide like he was a starved beast. He started crawling towards her, his stomach practically touching the bed, looking all the more like some kind of beast seeking his prey. 

She knew that she was in trouble. 

All she could do was stick out her foot when he was halfway up her bed. She pressed her bare foot against the trapezius muscle next to his neck, feeling how taut it was as he crawled to her slowly. 

"Luca," she responded, a warning tone in her voice. 

"Now you're going to stop me…" he uttered. "This is what I agreed to, isn't it?" 

The promise was returning to him. He found her expression to be grounding for him. 

Little did he know, this is what his real family referred to as a flaw. Unlike the line of alpha males he came from, he perceived others above his instincts. 

He turned his head and pressed his lips against the side of her shin. Then his hand reached for her knee and slid higher until it was on the outside of her thigh. 

Sophia wondered how even something like that felt good. She bit her lip as she watched him kiss her leg and work his way up. 

There wasn't a bit of her that wanted him to stop but the thought of the evening being ruined because she couldn't perform correctly was looming over her like a dark cloud.

For years she had talked herself into sleeping with her ex. She always tried to be positive and say that it would be different the next time but it never was. 

She shook her head even though the heat between her legs was begging her to let him continue.

The moment his lips and hands left her body, the pain crept back in and her eyebrows lowered in confusion. How could he make her forget her pain? Was it her body's way of saying it was a mistake to stop?

The man in front of her groaned and he lay face down in the bed for a moment. 

If she wasn't mistaken, it looked like he was the one in pain as he writhed there and slipped back onto the floor, only his chest and arms resting on the bed as he stared up at her. 

He realized he shouldn't have pushed so far. He didn't know how he was supposed to continue with the knowledge of what her bare skin felt like underneath his hands and not be able to explore it further. 

Despite the space between them, she could smell his scent and her heart was miserable. Everything inside of her was begging her to submit to him and as he stared at her, she knew that he wanted to dominate her. 

She agonized over the fear of disappointing him. 

He made her feel so good and he hardly touched her. She feared that she would never be able to affect him the way he was affecting her. 

"I'm sorry," Sophia suddenly apologized and put a hand over her mouth before she could say more. The desire to spill all of her insecurities had risen to the surface. 

"I pushed too hard," Luca tried to assure her, though he couldn't get closer to her or he was likely to act as he did before. "It isn't your fault." 

"I need to go to sleep," she said. 

Luca could only nod and he stood up, escaping her room where the sweet smell lingered in every corner. 

However, by the time he was in the bathroom between the rooms and the door was shut behind him, he had to drag himself to the other room. The moment his door was shut behind him as well, he fell to his knees and clenched his fists. 

With a grimace, he tried to control himself. 

His heart was racing and he wasn't satisfied. It felt like life or death to go into her room and demand she finish what she started. 

Yet he thought of how she feared him the first days they were together and he knew that he would rather bear the pain than break her trust. 

Rather than peacefully falling asleep, he sat on the floor, swallowing his groans of pain so she wouldn't hear him. Eventually, sleep did reach him but it was only after his energy was depleted and there was no other choice.