Once upon a time, I did not understand. To a person who did not realize how to love herself, who thinks that if he is happy, I am happy, this statement seemed a bit pretentious.
But now I taste it and I find it very deep, perhaps this rebirth has made me completely transparent, and enlightened me.
Once, all the unpleasant pasts have already passed, and now I can start over again. I have a new life, and I shouldn't live as pathetically as before. I should cleanse my heart to welcome a new beginning, a new future, and a different life.
I must live happily, live excitingly, everything is just right, everything is just fine.
Unconsciously the sky had darkened, and I was hungry. Then I realized that Han Dongchen was not by my side, and Su Xiaowan just happened to calm her emotions.
After waiting about five minutes, I saw him coming from the side of the carriage, holding two meat buns in his hand, and also boiling a bowl of boiling water.
Su Xiaowan had a crescent shaped smile. What a good man, handsome and caring, who really knows how to take care of people, how precious, she thought. 'Is he already fond of me because he treats me so well? I'm so happy, I'm like a flower. I thought to myself, this man is worthwhile cultivating, let's keep watching his performance. If he continues like this, reluctantly, I might accept you.' (Sister, you really thought too much. Captain Han really didn't mean anything else. It's just that you were a girl, so he did it out of kindness.)
From a distance, Han Dongchen saw Su Xiaowan laughing so happily, he didn't know what she was thinking, but his mood improved unconsciously too. Close by, he also did not speak, with a straight face, he handed the buns to Su Xiaowan, he picked up the cornbread from his family and started eating with the boiled water.
There was no choice. The conditions were not good now. A meat bun was sold for 20 cents outside, but two buns costed 50 cents on the train, which was too expensive. Moreover, he, as a grown man, would not be full with two buns. The cornbread was better to resist hunger. Almost all the money he brought with him was almost gone, and he still owed 500 yuan to his family.
Su Xiaowan didn't know all this, but watching Han Dongchen with a straight face, giving her the meat buns he bought, she was not afraid of his stern face. Maybe she also felt his cold exterior but warm interior, so she didn't care at all, and even happily accepted the buns to eat.
After eating a few bites, she saw Han Dongchen eating cornbread and drinking boiled water. She was a little moved again. She also knew that this meat bun must not be cheap, otherwise, he wouldn't be reluctant to buy it to eat.
Su Xiaowan silently ate a bun. When she was eating the second one, she struggled for a while, but finally broke it in half and gave it to Han Dongchen, saying, "I'm small and half a bun is enough for me, you eat the rest."
Han Dongchen still looked at her expressionlessly, but this time he did not refuse, accepted it, and ate it straight away. He thought to himself, 'She is quite merciful, not that selfish.'
Su Xiaowan didn't know that she had sacrificed half a bun and got a good impression on Han Dongchen. Because of the interaction of half a bun, the atmosphere was quite good. During the next time, they chatted for a while.
Of course, Su Xiaowan would not give up learning the names of his brothers and sisters. According to him, their parents had no cultural background, so the names were all very casual.
Just as I thought at the time, the big brother, Han Qiushou, was born in autumn. At that time, it was the harvest in autumn, so the older brother's name appeared.
Han Dongchen was born at 6 o'clock in the morning in winter, so his name was Han Dongchen, which was quite appropriate.
The elder sister, Han Chun Hua, was born in spring. It just so happened that the flowers on the mountain would bloom early.
Only the name of third brother and second sister were a little difficult. They were born together just at the start of summer. Someone casually said, "It's the beginning of summer", and the youngest brother's name was confirmed. (I was thinking, if someone had said "It's the start of summer," the name of the youngest brother might have been "Start of Summer", haha.) The smallest daughter, because the elder sister was called Chun Hua, was subsequently named Xia Hua.
This family is really convenient. Compared with other people in the village, their names look very cultured. They didn't call them Dog Remnants, Iron Egg, Big Dani, Second Ya, it's already pretty good.
It was more difficult to bear at night, the temperature was a bit low. Su Xiaowan was planning to lean on Han Dongchen, did she cross the line during the day? He seemed to have noticed something. Anyway, in the end, she did not succeed. Su Xiaowan turned a deaf ear to him. However, there are still a lot of days to get along in the future, and there will be a long day to come.
At night, Su Xiaowan folded the cloth bag she brought as a pillow. Anyway, there were few people on the train. Su Xiaowan occupied a row of seats and lay down to sleep. However, Han Dongchen still sat upright across from her, closing his eyes, not knowing whether he was asleep or not.
In the middle of the night, I felt a bit cold. It seemed that Han Dongchen put his coat on her. Su Xiaowan did not open her eyes and fortunately slept until dawn.
After a good night's sleep, it was already dawn when I got up. In the carriage, there seemed to be more people, which was a lot lively. Han Dongchen from across the street was gone, his clothes were still on Su Xiaowan's body. The feeling was warm in heart and body. There was a faint smell of his body on the clothes, and it smelled good.
After a while I saw Han Dongchen coming over wearing a half-sleeve camouflage shirt with something in his hand. He put the things on the table and said expressionlessly, "Got up, go wash your face, come back to breakfast".
Su Xiaowan saw that he had bought breakfast, rice porridge, eggs, and steamed buns, as well as a bit of pickles. But this time it was a double portion. She was very happy and secretly relieved. Honestly, if Su Xiaowan always eats fine food and Han Dongchen eats cornbread, she would not feel comfortable.
After silently adding a point to Han Dongchen for his understanding in her heart, she handed him the clothes and said, "Thank you last night, otherwise I would be definitely been woken up by the cold. You put on your clothes first, and I will wash up."
When Su Xiaowan went to the bathroom and came back after washing up, she saw Han Dongchen sitting upright, and the eggs were all peeled. Su Xiaowan laughed when she saw it, this child can be taught!
After having a happy breakfast, Han Dongchen had cleaned up the leftovers and stretched out. At this time, the train entered a large station, Bin City station, where many people got on.
Two elderly people sat across from Su Xiaowan, both were dressed properly. The old man looked quite serious, but his arm seemed to be disabled. But whether it was walking or sitting, he was very similar to Han Dongchen. Although he did not wear a military uniform, he looked like a veteran. He imprinted the habit of a soldier into his bones, so every move showed the demeanor of a soldier.
The old lady was much like a scholar, but she was very kind. Just entered the carriage, there were a little bit more people, mostly young people and not many old people. Su Xiaowan saw them with a quick glance, but she continued sitting without any reaction. Han Dongchen sitting across from her did not see them.
The people who passed by were obstructed by Han Dongchen's stern face and fierce momentum, so they dared not come to sit. When the two elderly people got closer, Su Xiaowan stood up as if she had just discovered them, and enthusiastically said, "Auntie, there are seats here. I will help you put the things up. You sit first." Since it was the old lady walking in front, Su Xiaowan's enthusiastic help did not seem abrupt.