|| LOOK WHAT I'VE BECOME ||
It was hard to do but I'd done it, because of You, Benedict I killed the love of my life. Like a parasite attacks its host, since you appeared from nowhere my relationship with Grace was never as it once was.
Now she's dead and I wake up every morning hearing her voice in my head, yelling and telling me how monstrous my actions were.
But I am not a monster, I kill to protect those I love, it's been rotted in me since my childhood. I grew up in a family where my dad was never around, I was an only child because it seemed after my birth, the love between my father and my mother withered, he left the house when I was just two and never came back, I can't even recognize his face, until the news came that he had died by consuming a hazardous amount of alcohol which led to a car accident.
My mom was never the same after the death of my father, he had been her rock, the love of her life despite the fact that he'd fallen out of love with her, and she still hoped and prayed he'd change his mind and comeback to his family but he never did.
My mom got so traumatized about his death to the extent she was sent to a psychiatric hospital, if it wasn't for my father's younger brother Uncle Gilbert who took the responsibility to train me in school and take care of me, my life would have been in ruins. I'd promised myself that whenever I found love, I'll be as protective as possible; I'll always be present never absent.
So I killed Benedict to be protective of Grace, because I didn't want to end up like my dad.
It was a cold dark morning at St. Peter's Catholic Church, the silence that eluded the church Auditorium wasn't ordinary, even a traveller that just arrived would perceive that grief was in the air. Empire High school had lost two students under the space of three months.
Benedict's parents had just buried their son, and now it was the James's family burying their daughter.
Looking at the tears in their eyes I realized that indeed I had become a monster, I didn't need to deny it, I just needed to accept it and control my inner demons.
I didn't have to pretend during Grace's funeral because I was truly mourning her for good, I never bargained for this to happen, I just wanted to love and to be loved back.
I'd promised myself after I had killed Grace that her friend Mildred would be the last person I would kill. I sat alone at St. Peter's Catholic Church, when Victoria James came to sit with me. She was Grace's younger sister and only sibling; she was the only family member who was aware of the relationship between I and her sister. She looked sick and pale; I didn't need a magician to tell me that she'd been crying, unlike her dark skinned late sister, Victoria was on the fair side she'd gotten that complexion from her mom, while Grace got her complexion from her Dad.
As she rested her tears soaked face on my shoulder, she said, "What did Grace ever do to die like this?" although I knew deep down that I was the source of her grieve, I still pitied her because she didn't really know her sister Grace very well.
Grace might be a saint to the students of Empire High school and to the James Family but they didn't know the full story, she was the love of my life who was also a cheater, she never confessed her relationship with Benedict even after his death. I just sat quietly with Victoria until she left for the bath room and then Mildred came to take a seat beside me.
Mildred was lucky we were in the church because if not I wouldn't hesitate to eliminate her immediately, She came closer and murmured something into my ear.
From what Mildred was saying Grace was a week pregnant before she was Murdered, I asked Mildred how she knew this, stating the fact that Grace never mentioned anything about a pregnancy to me while she was alive.
In fact it seemed she was avoiding me, we hadn't talked for weeks until the school announced her dead. I announced to Mildred who only looks at me sternly.
"Jason! Grace was avoiding you because of the pregnancy" Mildred informed me." She didn't know how to face you or even talk to you about it, she was scared Jason!" Mildred added before she stood up and headed to her family.
So that's why Grace was acting weird and distant she was pregnant? She hadn't seen the picture, she hadn't even seen her cousins Francis Instagram post, damn! I am truly a monster not only had I murdered Grace I had also killed My unborn child, my Dad would be laughing at me in hell by now, I had promised myself I wouldn't be like him, hurting the people I loved but here I am bringing nothing but pain and suffering to those around me.
I was like a walking time bomb waiting to explode. This circle of pain and death needed to end now and it will.