Ron refused, and Harry politely followed suit, figuring there was a good reason Ron (who was always hungry) passed up a chance to eat.
"Well, suit yourself. Now, what brings yeh all the way out here?"
"Harry wanted to meet you," Ron piped up, causing Hagrid's smile to widen even further.
"I was curious as to what exactly you do here, Mr. Hagrid," Harry said.
"Oh, jus' Hagrid, Harry, jus' Hagrid! Anyway, I'm the one who watches o'er the grounds here at Hogwarts, and I take care of all the magical creatures aroun' here too."
Harry tilted his head a bit. "I figured as much, but I was wondering, with the creatures, what's it that you actually do?"
Hagrid looked very pleased by the question. "Well," he began, "It really depends on the sort of creature, yeh see? Some of 'em just go off 'n do their own thing, but some of 'em need some tender lovin' care, if yeh know what I mean. They need feedin', and watchin', and company and all that."
Harry was smiling as he listened. "So what kind of creatures do you take care of, Hagrid?"
"Oh, well there's the creatures that P'fessor Kettleburn works with, yeh know, for the Care of Magical Creatures class. I've got a colony of flobberworms out back that I keep around, and I keep some fire crabs down by the lake. It's always a challenge keepin' them away from the salamanders living near by...they don' particularly get along, yeh see," Hagrid said, sounding a little distraught about the last part.
Harry nodded solemnly, and Ron was starting to look quite entranced.
"What about bigger creatures?" Harry asked.
"Oh, well, I'm the one that keeps all the thestrals healthy and clean, and I keep a couple of hippogriffs aroun' here too. Third year magical creatures, they are. Oh, and unicorns too."
"Unicorns!" Ron exclaimed, "You have unicorns?"
"Oh, sure I do! They make 'emselves scarce in the winter, but yeh come down 'ere when it gets a bit warmer, and I'll introduce yeh."
Harry and Ron looked at each other and grinned.
"I think I might really enjoy that, Hagrid, thank you."
"Yeah, thanks Hagrid!"
"Oh, it's no problem at all, really."
"And what about creatures that aren't used for the Care of Magical Creatures class?"
"Well...there are some who make a home here at Hogwarts, yeh see? And I try to keep 'em comfortable, and safe away from all the students. For instance, I make sure the grindylows are well fed down in the Great Lake, and I keep the bugbears away from the students, deep in the Forbidden Forest."
"Bugbears?" Ron said curiously.
"Oh, yeah, funny little things they are, once yeh get to know 'em. But not so good around strangers – they can be a bit temperamental...they rather enjoy scaring people, yeh see."
"Do you take care of any fairies, Hagrid?" Harry could not help but wonder.
"Ah, that, Harry, is quite a challenge. Yeh see, I got me pixies 'n me brownies, and they need lots of attention, those ones – the challenge is keepin' 'em away from the students, so they don't go off causing trouble. Especially gotta watch out for those joint eaters."
Ron gulped audibly. "Joint eaters?"
"Oh, yeah, yeh want to stay away from those, Ron."
Ron nodded, a bit pale.
"I sometimes get nomad types to," Hagrid said thoughtfully, "A herd of wild hippogriffs, a kelpie, or a shellycoat here or there. I make sure they enjoy their stay here at Hogwarts."
"So, any magical creatures on the school grounds – you'd know about them?" Harry inquired.
"Oh of course! I take care of all of 'em!"
Harry nodded, a curious look on his face. "Because, you see, I heard this rumour the other day, about a giant three-headed dog chained up in the third floor corridor."
Hagrid grew alarmed at that. "Fluffy? How did yeh know about Fluffy?"
"Fluffy?" Ron asked, looking between them with wide eyes, "There's a giant three-headed dog and it's called Fluffy?"
"Yeah, he's mine – bought him off a Greek chappie I met in the pub las' year. I lent him to Dumbledore to guard the -"
"The?" Harry prompted.
"Now see here, yeh ought not go asking questions about that, yeh hear? That's between Dumbledore an' Nicholas Flamel -" Hagrid stopped short at that, looking furious with himself. "I shouldn' 'ave said that."
Harry shook his head. "Don't worry about it Hagrid. I was just curious, is all. Ron and I will forget all about it, won't we Ron?"
Ron nodded, looking very confused about the whole thing, but Hagrid seemed quite satisfied with that.
"Now," he said, "Can I get yeh some tea?"
It would appear that Tom was correct. Hagrid was a lovely person, a pleasant conversationalist, and a wonderful host, but he really wasn't too bright.
"The Philosopher's Stone."
Harry frowned. "The who's what?"
Tom scowled at him. "The Philosopher's Stone. It's an alchemical compound fabled to manufacture wealth and eternal life for its owner."
"Wait, what? How can a stone do that?"
"I am no alchemist, Harry, or else I would have made one for myself long ago."
"Fair enough. So..." Harry began questioningly.
"So what does this tell us?" Tom asked patronizingly.
"That...Dumbledore's hiding the Philosopher's Stone at Hogwarts for some reason."
"Yes, and what might that reason be?"
"Well, you said that Hogwarts is one of the safest places there is, right? Maybe it's just here for safekeeping?"
"And what's wrong with that theory, Harry?"
Harry frowned. "I thought that was a pretty good theory."
"But you're missing something," Tom said impatiently.
Harry bit his lip, making a face that could only be interpreted as the face of someone in deep thought. "Well...I suppose there's the question of why it needs to be protected...but that's obvious. It's really valuable, right?"
"Yes, and it's fair to assume that it has always been protected. But why Hogwarts? Why now?"
Harry's eyes widened. "If you know about the Stone, it's at least 10 years old! So where's it been for the last 10 years? Why would they move it now? That's it, right? That's what we're missing."
Tom seemed pleased with his deduction. "So tell me, Harry, why here? Why now?"
"Because...someone's looking for it! Professor Dumbledore knows that, which is why he offered to hide it here for that Nicholas Flamel guy."
"Correct. Now, who might be looking for it?"
Harry's eyes lit up. "Voldemort!"
"Precisely."
....
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