I was sitting on the sofa in my room, reading a book, when I heard a
discreet knock on the door.
[It's open, come in.]
[Excuse me, Master. A letter has arrived.]
[Ahh, thanks as always, Anima. Can you leave it there?]
[Understood.]
This is a common exchange… Anima handles the letters sent towards
me, while she brings me the letters from my friends.
Anima is used to this, as after hearing my response, she quickly places
the unread letters in an easy-to-spot area on my desk.
Then, Anima bowed her head and was about to leave, just as per usual,
but today, I spoke at that moment.
[…Anima.]
[Yes?]
[There's something I'd like to ask you, so do you have some time?]
[Yes, there's no problem!]
Smiling at Anima, who answered me with a neat salute, I decided to ask
her about the conversation I had just seen between her and my parents.
[…Errr, I actually overheard Anima and Mom and Dad talking earlier…]
When I said that much, I noticed that Anima's expression turned pale.
Arehh? What's with her reaction…
[T- That's not it! I- It's not that I meant to disrespect Master when I said
those words earlier…]
[Ahh, unnn. No, I'm not angry, okay?… I should have chosen my words
more carefully.]
Ahh, I see… I guess she turned pale because she thought I was going to
be mad at her. How should I say this… It really was like her to worry
about such things.
[Errr, I don't know what's a good way to say this but… I'm not mad at
you, it's more like I'm a little surprised by what you said.]
[Surprised?]
[Unnn, it might just be me assuming things by myself but… I thought
that the Anima I knew back then would have raised my name even
higher… so I was surprised. So, I wanted to ask you some things about
that. Ahh, of course, I won't force you to answer me if you don't want
to.]
I felt that she had grown a lot compared to before, especially her mental
growth. Perhaps, that might be the reason why I wanted to ask her
about her change in her mentality.
At my question, Anima paused with a puzzled look on her face, and
after a moment, she reservedly responded.
[…It doesn't matter.]
[Unnn?]
[Ahh, no, that's it! I don't mean it in a bad way… Errr… P- Please wait a
moment! Let me gather my thoughts.]
After she said this, Anima closed her eyes and took a deep breath for a
few moments. She then took off the hat she was wearing, held it to her
chest with one hand, and opening her eyes, she looked straight at me
and spoke.
[…Embarrassing it may be to say this, but the immature me back then…
as Master pointed out, was quite hasty. Not only in my abilities, but
even in my mentality.]
[...]
[It's difficult for me to explain, but I'm sure that… I don't think I have
the confidence about my position as a retainer either. Thus, I praised
Master excessively. Being that "the master I serve is so amazing" makes
it that I was amazing for serving such a master, I was shouting such
things like a beast claiming its territory.]
I'm not saying that her words don't make me think about anything. The
personality of the Anima back then wasn't thinking about her actions at
all. In fact, I think she was thinking about a lot of things.
Now that I think about it, Anima called herself a damned beast when we
first met, and felt inferior to Alice… Perhaps, deep within her heart,
Anima was feeling unsure of herself.
[Looking back on it, I feel ashamed of how stupid I was, but at that time,
I didn't have the composure to realize it.]
[…However, your mentality has changed now, right?]
[Yes… No, I probably haven't changed. I think I just "became aware".]
[Became aware?]
[…It had been a year and eight months since Master had returned to the
other world, and I had plenty of time to think. Thereupon, I reexamined
my feelings.]
After saying this, Anima fell silent again for a moment and looking at
me with eyes filled with determination, she conveyed her feelings to
me.
[…You don't have to be amazing. You don't have to be strong. I didn't
serve Master because you're amazing, nor am I devoting myself to you
because you're strong.]
As she continued to speak, Anima's face gradually grew redder and
redder. However, she didn't stop speaking and continued weaving her
words with a blush on her face.
[Those things don't matter, as for me… For me… the Master, who is
always kind, but still has the courage to stand up when needed, and
treats even a squire like myself with warmth… i- i- is the one I adore!!!]
[...…]
[Because I was able to recognize these feelings, I was able to ascertain
that these feelings were true… I no longer needed to excessively raise
up Master's name. For me… Unembellished, just as Master always was…
is the most wonderful Master will always be… and I want to always be
on Master's side, and be able to help Master.]
Liking me not because I'm amazing, adoring me not because I'm
strong… They were words wholeheartedly telling me that she loved the
unembellished me, just the way I am.
This was her feelings that clearly answered the emotions she had
hidden since the time of the Six Kings Festival.
The words she told me were inexplicably warm————- and made me
really happy