An amusement park built by Shiro-san. I had already expected that it
would be out of the ordinary… but a roller coaster that runs at "10
times the speed of sound for more than ten minutes"… isn't something
that I had really imagined.
I couldn't see the scenery at all. In the first place, this roller coaster ride
doesn't look that big on the outside, so we might have entered some
other space on the way.
Well, thanks to Shiro-san's blessing, or perhaps, it may have been Alice's
handiwork, but the impact on my body was about the same as a normal
roller coaster. It was still so fast that I honestly don't know what was
going on though.
[Fumu, peacefully looking at the scenery like this doesn't seem to be so
bad.]
[…Why are you drinking tea…]
[Should I have served Kaito-san tea as well?]
[No, I can only see a future where I'm bathing in tea…]
It may have been hopelessly fast for me, but it seems like the roller
coaster is rather slow for Shiro-san, as by the time we reached the end
of the ride, I saw her with a cup of tea in hand.
I mean, looking closely, I can see that Shiro-san isn't wearing any sort of
seatbelt, and is just sitting normally. It was a sight that reminded me of
the difference between our specs.
[…Shiro-san, let's go somewhere more subdued next time.]
[I understand. Well then, let's go to the haunted house.]
Haunted house… One of the classics. It is indeed as I requested, an
attraction that doesn't involve any strenuous activity.
I'm not particularly fond of ghosts, but if it's Alice directing it, I'm
definitely going to enjoy this.
The haunted house I arrived in with Shiro-san was designed to
resemble a western-style house… a western-style horror house.
The room was a bit cool. As we walked together through its corridors, I
could even hear the windows shaking, creating quite an atmosphere.
[Hoooooooo…]
[Uwaaahhh!?]
After a little while, a zombie appeared from the end of the corridor,
slowly approaching while groaning.
T- This is kinda… As expected of Alice. It's honestly a little bit scary.
Right after I was startled by the presentation that was more realistic
than I had expected, Shiro-san, who was standing next to me, pointed
her index finger at the slowly approaching zombie… and fired an "ultrathick beam" from her fingertip—— Wait!? Ehhhhhhh!?
[Ugyyaaaaahhhh!?]
Eh? What are you doing, Shiro-san? Why are you nonchalantly
vanquishing the zombie?
As I was stunned by Shiro-san's unexpected action, Alice appeared right
before us.
[What are you doing, you sh*tty goddess!? Why did you suddenly start
firing beams when I came out!? If it wasn't me, you would have
seriously vanquished it away, you know!!!?]
[…Isn't a haunted house an attraction where you defeat all the things
that try to haunt you?]
[This isn't that sort of violent attraction! No, even if it was such an
attraction, there's no way you're allowed to use "a beam that will
annihilate you by the atoms"!!! Hey, I'm seriously asking you here… Life
is at stake already, you know… Please study not only its appearance, you
should also know its contents.]
[Fumu.]
Alice was absolutely right about this matter. Shiro-san, if you look at my
memory, you should be able to know what kind of attraction this is,
right? Please study it properly.
[I understand.]
Saying that, Shiro-san stared at me for a moment. She then nodded, as if
she was convinced with something, before turning to Alice.
[No problem. I understand everything.]
[…What is this? This unsettling feeling… Well, fine.]
Alice looked slightly dissatisfied, but for the time being, she
disappeared as if she trusted Shiro-san's words that there wouldn't be
any problem anymore.
[Well then, Kaito-san. Let's walk around once again.]
[Ah, yes… Is it really alright?]
[No problem. I understand perfectly what I have to do here.]
How should I say this… I feel the same way as Alice. What is this? This
unsettling feeling…
Well, at any rate, I regained my composure and just decided to proceed
through the haunted house. This time, something that kinda looks like
Frankenstein's monster came walking towards me with an axe in hand.
This is also very well done…
[Kyaahhh, I'm scared.]
[...…]
[...…]
I've never heard something so glaringly fake. I don't know what kind of
reaction I should have to Shiro-san's expressionless and intonationless
"Kyaahhh" as she clung to me.
I mean, even Frankenstein's monster is frozen in place…
Errr… What should I do here? Shiro-san was throwing glances at me
while holding onto my arm, so I guess she wanted me to do something…
No, to be honest, I know what Shiro-san wants me to say… but they're
words that are so unrealistic that I hesitate to use them.
However, this would lead to that, right? It's that scenario where this
part won't end unless I do it.
[…I- It's alright. I- I will protect S- Shiro-san.]
[Thank you. As expected of Kaito-san, I can always rely on you.]
Me protecting Shiro-san… Even when I am the one who said this, I
almost laughed because it was just so unconvincing.
Anyway, it seemed like Shiro-san was satisfied with those words, as she
stopped clinging to my arm, and we cleared the haunted house, with
Shiro-san indifferently looking at anything that appeared to scare us,
not making such a reaction anymore.
As I walked out of the haunted house, holding hands with Shiro-san, she
spoke, looking somewhat serious.
[…Going like this won't do, isn't it?]
[Eh? What are you talking about?]
[I realized after that incident at the haunted house. There's something
lacking in our date.]
[S- Something lacking? What is it?]
I don't know how many times I've said this, but I have a bad feeling
about this.
[…There's a lack of "lovey-doveyness".]
[H- Haahhh…]
Look, she started saying something strange again.
[Kaito-san and I are a couple. And I think that in amusement park
dates… there should be more events where we flirt around.]
[...…]
The God just started talking about flirting… Also, even though there's
no flirting, there's a lot of events happening, I assure you.
[That's why, Alice. Please make arrangements that lead to Kaito-san and
I going lovey-dovey.]
[…Why the heck do I have to follow up here? That's already outside of
our prior arrangements. Stop throwing everything at me, do it
yourself.]
[I see. By the way, lend me your ear.]
[…What is it? You don't have anything that you…]
Alice, who was called by Shiro-san again, appeared, but her
unhappiness was quite blatant with her reply. However, Shiro-san didn't
seem to mind at all, as she started talking to Alice about something.
I've already seen what's going to happen next… She would definitely be
bribed again.
[…Eh? Seriously!?]
[I won't repeat myself.]
[…It can't be helped. Leave this to Love Master Alice-chan!]
[I'll leave this to you.]
As I had expected, the self-proclaimed Love Master, who had hundreds
of thousands of years of experience being a virgin, was easily bribed.
This won't do, Shiro-san, who had learned the Skill: Bribery, is just too
strong… And thus, the worst tag team ever was born. I am incredibly
anxious about my future.