I sat cross-legged in the cold, damp dungeon, surrounded by the dim light of glowing inscriptions etched into the walls. My breathing was steady, the faint hum of Qi resonating in my body as I tried once again to fuse my dantian with my soul. The breakthrough was so close I could almost taste it, but every time I reached for it, something was off. Something held me back.
"Damn it,"
I muttered under my breath, frustration building with each failed attempt. The words echoed in the empty chamber as I accessed my stats through the system.
Updated Character Stats After Breaking Through the 9th Stage
Physical Stats
Strength: 450
Agility: 380
Qi: 485
Endurance: 400
Title: Avenger (Horizon Avenger)
Perks of The Avenger:
1. Vengeful Resolve: Tremendous boost to strength, agility, and endurance against enemies who have wronged you. Also grants the ability to ignore pain temporarily during combat.
2. Recovery of the Resolute: Near-instant recovery after a victorious battle, including minor regeneration of lost limbs.
3. Avenging Aura (Leveled Up): The aura now imposes a debuff on enemies, reducing their attack potency by 30% and inflicting a paralyzing fear upon weaker opponents.
Cultivation Stats
Cultivation Level: Spirit Refinement Stage (9th Stage Peak)
Cultivation Physique: Divine Ascendant Body (Leveled Up by Celestial Genesis)
Elemental Affinity: All Elements (Greater Harmony Achieved)
The rest of the details appeared, and I skimmed through them, hoping something would stand out—something I was missing. As my gaze fell on the line reading "Nascent Soul Realm," my fists clenched.
Kousei:System, what am I doing wrong?
I asked aloud, my voice reverberating in the silence.
"System: Your spirit, mind, and soul are not fully connected due to unresolved issues."
I raised an eyebrow, leaning back slightly as I processed the response.
Kousei:Unresolved issues? What do you mean? I've already made peace with everything in this life.
The system paused before responding, almost as if it were considering its words carefully.
"System: I am not referring to this life. I am referring to your past life."
"My past life?" I snorted, shaking my head.
Kousei:I don't even remember my past life. I don't see how something I can't recall is supposed to hold me back.
"System: Memory is not required for your unresolved issues to linger. The remnants of your past-life emotions, regrets, and unresolved conflicts are embedded in your soul. They create fractures in your spiritual cohesion, preventing the full fusion required for the Nascent Soul Realm."
I let out a frustrated sigh.
Kousei:That doesn't make any sense. I've built a life here. I've made peace with the fact that I don't remember my old one. Why should I care about something that has no bearing on who I am now?
"System: Denial will not resolve these issues."
I bit back an angry retort, my cerulean gaze narrowing at the glowing runes around me.
Kousei:Denial? Look, I've saved lives here. I've built relationships here. I've fought alongside Issei, my brother, against overwhelming odds. We saved the Nekoushous together, and even managed to wound Grayfia, though we both know she wasn't going all out. I've found happiness here I've found love here isn't that enough?
"System: You tell yourself it is enough, but deep within, your soul knows otherwise. Your unresolved issues create an imbalance, hindering your path to transcendence. These are the cracks preventing your fusion"
The words struck a chord, but I wasn't ready to concede.
Kousei:I've made peace with everything here. I have no lingering doubts or regrets in this life. If anything, I've surpassed all expectations for someone reincarnated into this world.
Why am I feeling so triggered over this...my past life why do I feel this sense of dread...
It wasn't coming from me directly I felt it in my soul
"System: You have made peace with this life, but you have avoided addressing the echoes of your past. When you first arrived in this world, you remarked that your memories of your past life were lost. Have you ever wondered why? Or questioned whether you truly let go of what was left behind?"
I opened my mouth to respond but stopped short. I remembered those early days—the confusion, the overwhelming realization that I was in a world I once thought fictional. Back then, I had chalked it all up to a clean slate, an opportunity to start over. I had never questioned what I left behind.
Kousei:I... don't need to
I said quietly, more to myself than to the system.
Kousei:that life is gone. It's irrelevant.
"System: You say that now, but your soul carries the weight of what you've chosen to ignore. The remnants of your past life are not entirely erased. They are hidden, buried beneath the layers of your new existence. Until you confront them, your path forward will remain blocked."
I clenched my fists, my golden aura flickering faintly in the dim light.
Kousei:Why should I be held back by something I can't even remember? Why does this...past life matter so much?
System: "Because it is part of who you are. Ignoring it does not erase its influence. The Nascent Soul Realm requires complete harmony—mind, body, and soul. Without addressing this imbalance, you cannot ascend."
I leaned forward, my head resting against my crossed arms as I thought through the system's words. The frustration was still there, but now it was mingled with uncertainty. Had I been ignoring something vital all this time?
"What do I even do about it?" I asked quietly. "If my past life is gone—if I can't remember it—how am I supposed to confront anything?"
"System: The memories are not gone. They are suppressed, locked within the depths of your soul. Meditation and introspection will allow you to access them, but only if you are willing to face what lies within."
A bitter laugh escaped me.
Kousei:So you want me to dig through forgotten memories and unresolved feelings, just so I can punch through to the Nascent Soul Realm. Great. Just great.
"System: This is not just about cultivation. It is about achieving true harmony with yourself. Only then will your soul be strong enough to ascend."
I sat there in silence for a long moment, staring at the flickering inscriptions on the walls. Part of me wanted to argue further, to reject the idea outright. But another part of me—the part that had been hitting a wall in my cultivation for weeks—knew the system was right. I couldn't keep ignoring the echoes of a life I had tried so hard to forget.
"Fine," I said at last, my voice low but resolute.
Kousei:if that's what it takes, I'll face it. But don't expect me to enjoy this.
I looked deep into my own soul
It started suddenly, like a pull beneath the surface of a dark ocean. One moment I was meditating, focusing on my Qi and soul, and the next it felt as if I was drowning—pulled under by a force I couldn't see.
But I wasn't drowning.
I was standing.
I opened my eyes to find myself in a bustling city, the noise of cars and people filling my ears. The air was heavy, tainted with exhaust fumes and something more subtle, like despair. The buildings loomed high, but everything felt muted, as if the color had been drained from the world.
Before me was a small café. Its windows were scratched and fogged, and inside I saw a teenage boy working as a waiter.
He couldn't have been older than fifteen or sixteen. His black hair was messy, the kind of mess you get from not having the time—or the will—to care. His gray eyes caught my attention immediately. They were dull and tired, holding the weight of someone far older. Those eyes weren't just sad—they were hollow.
He wore a uniform that was a size too big, the sleeves of his shirt hanging loosely around his thin wrists. His frame was painfully small, almost malnourished. It wasn't hard to tell he hadn't had a proper meal in a long time.
My chest tightened.
"Who…is he?" I asked aloud, though no one was there to hear me.
The boy moved mechanically, placing plates on tables and bowing slightly whenever he was spoken to. His body language screamed fear—his shoulders hunched, his head always tilted downward, avoiding eye contact with everyone.
Then it happened.
"ETHAN! Get over here!"
The shout came from the kitchen, and I saw a man storming toward the boy. The man was tall and thickly built, with a face that seemed permanently twisted into a scowl. His greasy hair was slicked back, and his beady eyes burned with anger. His apron was stained with what looked like oil, and his entire demeanor radiated malice.
"Yes, sir?" the boy—Ethan—asked quietly, his voice trembling as he turned to face the man.
"What the hell is this?!" The man shoved a plate into Ethan's hands, bits of food flying off as he did so. "The customer said this was cold! Do you even know how to check before you bring something out, or are you really that useless?"
Ethan:I-I'm sorry, sir
Ethan stammered, his head bowing lower.
Ethan:It won't happen again.
'Sorry' doesn't fix it, does it?!"
the man bellowed, his voice loud enough to make a nearby table of customers flinch.
Ethan didn't reply. He just stood there, his hands shaking as he held the plate.
The man sneered and leaned closer.
"Look at me when I'm talking to you, you spineless brat!"
Ethan's eyes darted up, meeting the man's for barely a second before snapping back down to the floor.
"Unbelievable,"
the man muttered, snatching the plate out of Ethan's hands
"Get back to work. And if you screw up again, you're out of here, you hear me?"
"Yes, sir," Ethan whispered before turning and walking back to the tables.
Nobody intervened.
Not one customer spoke up. Not one coworker tried to defend him. They all saw it. They all heard it. And they all pretended it wasn't happening.
I stepped forward, my fists clenched. I wanted to grab that bastard and hurl him across the room. But the moment I reached out—
I passed through him.
Kousei:What the—?
I tried again, but my hand phased through his body like smoke.
Kousei:Why can't I touch him?
I growled, but no one responded.
The world around me shifted.
Suddenly, I was in a dingy apartment. The walls were yellowed with age and covered in stains. There were beer bottles and cigarette butts scattered across the floor, and the stench was unbearable.
BAM!
The sound of a punch echoed through the room, and I turned just in time to see Ethan fall to the ground.
Above him stood a man—a disgusting excuse for a human being. He was unshaven, his face covered in patchy stubble, and his eyes were bloodshot. His shirt was torn, revealing a beer belly, and his breath reeked of alcohol even from where I stood.
"You dare bring in this change, you useless brat?!"
The man roared, his voice slurred but no less intimidating.
"George, that's enough,"
a woman's voice said.
I turned to see a woman sitting on the couch. Her skin was pale, almost sickly, and her cheeks were sunken. Her arms were covered in track marks, and her hair was greasy and unkempt. She looked like a ghost of a person, her eyes dead as she watched the scene unfold.
"He already got the money,"
she said lazily.
"What's the point? Relying on a useless brat to put food on the table—you know what, kid? You're not eating tonight at all. It's not like the money could cover it anyway."
Ethan didn't respond. He lay curled on the ground, his arms covering his head as if he were trying to make himself disappear.
I felt rage boil inside me, hotter than anything I'd ever felt before.
Kousei:This…was my past life?
I whispered, my voice trembling.
Ethan slowly pushed himself off the floor, his movements sluggish and shaky. He didn't even glance at the people who had just humiliated him as he dragged himself toward a small room at the end of the hall.
The room was tiny, barely big enough for a bed and a desk. The wallpaper was peeling, and the only light came from a cheap lamp on the desk.
Ethan collapsed onto the bed, pulling out a phone that had clearly seen better days. He opened an app and began watching anime, a small, faint smile tugging at the corners of his lips.
Kousei:So this was how I coped
I murmured, watching him.
Kousei:With everything…with all of this.
The scene shifted again.
I saw him at school. He sat alone at the back of the class, his head down as other students whispered and laughed. Someone threw a crumpled piece of paper at his head, and when he didn't react, they threw another.
"Hey, loser!"
a boy called out, standing up and walking over to him. The boy had a cocky grin and a sharp, cutting voice.
"What's wrong? Too scared to fight back?"
The teacher didn't even look up.
It all blurred together—scenes of Ethan being pushed into lockers, mocked in the hallways, ignored by everyone who could have helped.
And then…
The truck.
It hit him fast and hard, and the world went black.
I stood there, frozen. "How…how did I survive all of that?" I whispered.
But I already knew the answer. I didn't.