The room fell silent as Lucian stared at his lover, frozen for the moment, trying to comprehend the word that he just heard. Kieran's admission of willingness to consider polyamory left Lucian in a state of shock.
The silence hung heavy between them as he grappled with the magnitude of what Kieran had proposed. He had neither considered nor expected such an arrangement to be proposed between them. Not because the concept itself was something unheard of, in fact among supernaturals, this concept was prevalent. However, he never expected Kieran to suggest something like this for their relationship, and the weight of it pressed heavily upon him.
Finally, he found his voice, though it was tinged with uncertainty. "Kieran, what are you saying right now? You realize it is not something to be said so lightly, right?"
Kieran nodded, his eyes reflecting his decision's pain and his unconditional love for Lucian. "I do understand what I'm saying, Lucian. I'm sure I don't want to lose you, but I don't want you to feel trapped, either. If your connection with Sebastian means this much to you, I'm willing to explore this path for your sake, for our sake, even though it's not what I truly desire."
Lucian's emotions were in turmoil. He knew his growing feelings for Sebastian were undeniable, yet changing the dynamics of their centuries-long relationship was a heavy burden, and he was unsure whether he wanted to take the risk.
"Kieran, I understand that the concept itself is very common but are you sure this is what you want for us? You don't need to force yourself to do this for my sake, love. Don't make any hasty decisions." Lucian said as a hint of a plea filled his voice.
"I know I don't, and I know you wouldn't just leave me, Lucian, but I wouldn't suggest it if I can not handle it. I'm not sure whether this is exactly what I want but I have a feeling that this would be a good way to make this work for all of us. I have given it much thought, Lucian; it isn't a hasty decision. Trust me." Kieran said a bit reassuringly.
"I do trust you, my love, but…" Lucian takes in a deep, steadying breath before continuing. "I need more time to mull this over. I can't rush either of you into anything none of us are ready for." He says, sounding a bit conflicted.
Kieran nods. "I understand. I want you to know you don't need to hold back because we're together. As long as you're with me, I will explore anything for our sake." He spoke in a gentle tone.
The two lovers stood there, their hearts heavy with the weight of the conversation, knowing that whatever the outcome may be, their dynamics would change nonetheless. Lucian just hoped that if anything were to change, it would change for the better.
- - -
For the following days, Lucian seriously considered Kieran's offer. He didn't want to make any decisions lightly that may end up ruining either Sebastian's innocence or Kieran's unconditional love.v
His mind raced, conflicted between his deepening feelings for Sebastian and the love he had cherished with Kieran for centuries. He needed time to process the implications of Kieran's offer and understand the complex web of emotions woven.
Kieran watched Lucian closely, observing his inner turmoil, the burden of his decision still evident in his eyes. Yet, he remained silent, giving Lucian the time to wrap his head around everything.
- - -
One evening, as Kieran walked inside the private library, he saw Lucian pacing back and forth in deep thought. "what's wrong?" He asked with a hint of concern lingering in his tone.
Lucian, caught off guard by the sudden presence in the room, sighed as he stopped pacing and looked toward Kieran. "Nothing, I was just thinking." He said
"Kieran… I still don't know what I should do…" he added after thinking about it for a moment.
"I understand, Lucian. It's not an easy decision, and I wouldn't ask you to make it lightly. Take all the time you need. We don't need to rush into anything." Kieran replied with a reassuring smile on his face.
Lucian nodded gratitude in his gaze for Kieran's understanding. "Thank you, Kieran, for being so open to this and willing to fight for us." He said as he moved forward to wrap his arms around his lover.
Once filled with the warmth of a moment of triumph, their embrace now held the weight of uncertainty. They parted, knowing their love was strong enough to weather this storm but unsure where the path would ultimately lead.
- - -
A feeling of uncertainty lingered between Lucian and Kieran in the days following their discussion. As they went about their daily lives, Kieran couldn't help but feel jealous whenever he saw Lucian interacting with Sebastian. Yet, he kept his emotions hidden, not wanting to jeopardize what he had worked for over so many centuries.
On the other hand, Lucian continued to grapple with the mysterious and profound emotions he felt around Sebastian. It was neither love nor attraction, yet it felt like it was all of those simultaneously, and he couldn't quite put it into words.
It felt like he had always had these feelings within him locked away somewhere, ready to come out at the right time. He spent long hours contemplating this unexplainable connection and wondering what it meant for their future.
One evening, as they sat together inside Kieran's private parlor, Lucian finally broke the silence. "Kieran, I've been trying to understand what I feel for Sebastian. Yet it is so strong and mysterious, and it confuses me. It's so intense, yet I cannot grasp what it is."
Though wrestling with jealousy, Kieran leaned closer to Lucian, offering support. "Lucian, I know it's difficult, but I'm here for you. We can figure this out together."
Lucian nodded, his eyes reflecting the turmoil within. "I'm not even sure what this is. It's not love, not yet, but it's something so strong it feels like it's consuming me, so I can't ignore it either."
Kieran reaches out and takes Lucian's hand between his own. "Maybe it's the start of something new we haven't experienced before. But, Lucian, I need you to promise me one thing."
Lucian looked at him with a mix of curiosity and concern. "What is it, Kieran?"
"Promise me that no matter where this will take us, you'll never forget my love for you. That our bond is irreplaceable, promise you'll never leave me." Kieran said, his voice filled with emotion.
Lucian nodded with sincerity in his eyes. "I promise, Kieran. You mean the world to me, and nothing can change that. I have said this before, and I'll say it as many times as you need. I will never let anyone or anything get between the two of us. And I will never let anything separate the two of us either."
Kieran felt a small wave of relief wash over him. He knew the storm wasn't over yet, and even though it hadn't completely fixed anything, Lucian's words still managed to help him soothe some of his worries.
At that moment, Lucian felt grateful for having Kieran by his side. Even though he didn't know the extent, he could vaguely picture the emotions Kieran himself must be going through, yet here he was, trying his best to be the unwavering support.
Lucian continued to wrestle with his feelings, attempting to navigate the uncharted territory before him. His interactions with Sebastian grew more frequent, evolving from mere chance encounters to what appeared to be a daily ritual.