Shigure ended up crying on my shoulder for a long time. I patted him and held him tight.
When he had calmed down a little, he began talking.
*"Remember how we entered the cave to hide?"* he asked me.
*"Yes,"* I nodded. *"Before I passed out, the ground was shaking and I heard gunfire."*
*"It just so happened that the government came to look for us at that time,"* Shigure said. *"The villagers told them that we had gone up to the family shrine and that there had been a commotion up on the mountain, after which nobody had come down the mountain. The villagers felt that we may have inadvertently angered the mountain god - the snake, and were concerned that the big snake would come down the mountain to eat them. The government agents that had come to find us sent for backup upon hearing that. It seemed that they knew about the big snake living on the mountain already and had been helping supply the village with enough animals to sacrifice to the snake so that it wouldn't eat people."*
Shigure slumped in my arms, talking into my neck, while we sat on the ground in our shared mind space, leaning against a cushioned backrest I had imagined up so as to make us more comfortable.
*"When the snake came down the mountain, it entered the village, crushing houses and striking out at people and things in anger. In order to protect the village, the government agents opened fire, hoping to scare it back up the mountain. The snake refused to leave and it attacked the government agents and the soldiers in anger. They eventually had to kill it. The battle destroyed the villagers and left most of them wounded. The elders trying to protect the snake were killed by the snake during its rampage. After the snake was killed, they sent people up the mountain where they found that the shrines had been destroyed and most of the people by the shrine had been killed, including most of my family. Only a few people survived."*
*"Did any of your family survive?"* I asked.
*"One of my brothers," Shigure said and I felt his tears dripping. "He hates me now and doesn't want to see me again. He thinks it's all my fault. In fact, the entire clan and village don't want us to ever return. They've removed my name from the genealogy book."*
I hugged Shigure.
*"That makes two of us,"* I whispered. *"Neither have any place to call home now."*
*"Wherever you are will be my home,"* Shigure told me.
*"Wherever you are will be my home,"* I told Shigure in return.
*"Excuse me, children,"* interjected the Creator's voice now that He had our permission to intervene or interrupt us whenever, *"but I'm creating a home for both of you. You will have a place to belong. You don't have to worry."*
*"See,"* I comforted Shigure. *"You don't have to stress or worry. We've got a home with the Creator Father. He's making a home for us. We have somewhere we can both belong. You don't have to try so hard anymore."*
It felt like Shigure was able to put down a big stone that he'd been holding in his heart and I was relieved.
Shigure wasn't able to speak for a long time, but I felt his rush of gratitude toward me and the Creator Father. With his worries alleviated and finally able to relax, Shigure fell asleep. I slept with him, feeling at peace, now that Shigure was not hiding things from me anymore and had stopped beating himself up.
I felt sad that Otōsan and Okaasan had died though. Prickles of guilt jabbed me all over. It was because of me that much of this had happened, after all. At least, that's what I thought. That's why Shigure couldn't take all the blame. Part of the fault was mine.
This was not the sort of homecoming he had wanted. I took it as the price of not listening to the Creator Father's warning and obeying immediately. I knew there were times where there was space for hesitation, but this had not been one of them. The price for not obeying with alacrity was far larger than I had expected. Next time, I told myself, next time if the Creator Father gave a command, I'd act without pause.
When we opened our eyes later, the nurse that was bent over us gave a sigh of relief.
"You're awake. I'll go call the doctor," she said, rushing out the door.
The doctor came in fifteen minutes later and checked our vitals signs and the blood test results that the nurses must have organised while Shigure and I were still asleep. We had been sleeping in beds placed side by side, still hand in hand.
"You both fell into a coma after the cake," the doctor wiped her brow, wrinkling her forehead. "You scared us all for two days. Everything looks like it's in order. There's nothing unusual in the blood tests. Shigure-Kobe-san, how are you feeling? Should I inform those officials to postpone anything? Are you still feeling unwell? Although you appear to be well, you have just gone through an intensely stressful period of time and your body - which has also only recently recovered, may not be able to take all the stress."
"I'm fine," Shigure sat up, squeezing my hand and then letting go. "I feel much better than before now. I apologize for causing you all so much trouble."
"I'll keep you for another day of observation," the doctor rubbed her face, "but then I have to let you go. Another day of rest is the most I can get for you if you are feeling better. There is a lot of pressure but I hope the extra day of rest will be enough for you."
"Thank you," Shigure inclined his head and bowed from the bed. "Thank you very much."
The medical staff turned to leave and Shigure stroked my head, looking out the window in thought. I didn't disturb him, knowing he wanted to have some time to himself. Instead, I rolled onto my side to be closer to him and used his lap as my pillow. I felt the Creator Father's presence and guessed He was conversing with Shigure.
Shigure helped feed me during meal times and we just enjoyed the time together, talking about mundane things. The next morning came far too quickly and when I woke up, Shigure was gone.
"Don't panic," was the first thing my morning nurse said when she came in. "Your husband just left. They said he'll be back in a month."
"I understand," I said with a nod, allowing her to help me with my usual morning routine and answered all the usual morning questions.
I had a room to myself without Shigure. It was quiet and slightly boring. Sitting up in the bed with the bed head raised, I worked hard on the few exercises I had been told to do until I fell asleep. At lunch time, the nurse helped feed me as my arms were both broken and I could barely move them. After lunch, I did a few more exercises before my body shut down for some rest.
Through my link with Shigure, although I didn't know what was going on, I could tell he was busy. I didn't want to disturb him and distract him from his work. It was to our benefit for us to stay on the government's good side.
In the evening, a woman who had a few bullet wounds was admitted into my room. She had just undergone emergency surgery and the medical staff were worried about her.
"Help her ring the bell for help if you notice something wrong," my nurse told me and I nodded my understanding.
Because the staff were all busy, when dinner came, all I could do was smell it and look at it. When the kitchen staff returned to take my dinner away, they noticed it hadn't been touched.
"Do you not like this food?" the kitchen staff asked me, hesitating over whether to take the tray away or not.
"I want to eat it," I said with some tears in my eyes, "but my arms…" I looked down at both my arms. One was in a plaster cast. The other was in a sling.
"Oh," the kitchen staff member scratched her nose. "I will inform the nurse. I'm sorry."
My evening nurse rushed in. She seemed in a bad mood. I tried to eat quickly so that she could get back to whatever she needed to do, but ended up choking. While I was choking, I passed out and didn't get to finish eating. It was very exasperating.
Late in the night, I was woken up by my neighbour's moans. I coughed to finish clearing my lungs and took a moment to reposition myself.
"Are you ok?" I called out in the loudest whisper I could manage. "Do you want me to call the nurse?"
"No. I can press the button myself," said my neighbour through what sounded like gritted teeth. "No need to bother yourself."
"Ok," I replied, looking around and realising that someone had left my nurse call button far away on the bedside drawers where I couldn't reach. Even if I had wanted to help, I couldn't.
The night nurse came soon after and from what I could hear, it sounded like she gave the other woman some pain killers. She checked in on me and seeing that I was awake, asked if I would like some sandwiches, seeing as I had been unable to eat much dinner earlier. My stomach growled in reply.
The night nurse sat with me to feed me, chatting with both my neighbour and myself as she did so. She opened the curtain so that we could see each other and talk more freely. From her I learned that this was a special government hospital, usually used for people with sensitive identities who actively serving. On the surface, it was a specialised public hospital, but that was only in the upper floors above ground. I was in a high dependency unit that specialised in trauma care within the restricted area of the hospital.
No wonder most of the staff were so competent and busy. I wouldn't hold it against the nurse who had forgotten to feed me. I didn't want to accumulate a long list of grudges again.
"Where are you from?" my neighbour, Hayashi Mikiko - Miki-san for short, asked me. "Your accent sounds like it comes from near my hometown and yet the way you speak and phrase things sounds like you come from overseas. You definitely look like a foreigner."
Being unsure whether the people here knew about talented people with special abilities, I decided to try and pass it off as something relatively ordinary. When I knew how much I could share and talk about, I could say more. Until then, it was best to reduce my presence as much as possible.
"I learnt Nihongo overseas from my husband," I replied. "So although I can speak reasonably well, sometimes it comes out strange or a bit rude to someone who grew up here. I only came recently, so I'm still trying to adjust to the culture."
"Like that. I see," Miki-san nodded her head and used the Nihongo name that Shigure had given me to use while we were in Nihon. "Nodoka-chan, I'm sure you'll adjust quickly. You can already speak and understand so we'll, I'm sure you'll get the hang of things soon. When did you arrive in Nihon?"
"Uh," I wrinkled my nose. "I don't know. I've actually lost track of time with how unwell I've been. Do you know?" I asked the nurse who was feeding me.
"You've only been here for a few days with this admission," the nurse told me. "I'm not too sure about your previous hospital admission."
"Sorry," I apologised to my neighbour.
"That's alright," Miki-san smiled and shook her head. "How did you get yourself so injured?"
"I, uh," I needed to pause and think of the best story to tell without lying, "I fell down a mountain."
"Really? How did you do that? Did you not walk on the official path?" Miki-san raised her eyebrows at me.
"I fell off the official path," I sighed, remembering the feeling of that huge snake tail whacking me into the air like a baseball bat striking a ball. It had been a horribly terrifying sensation.
"Who falls off the official path and ends up like you?" Miki-san shook her head. "Nodoka-chan, tell the truth. You were pushed by someone very hard, weren't you?"
"In a manner of speaking," I agreed.
"So it wasn't an accident?" Miki-san's eyes bore into me with a sternness that reminded me of someone in authority and who had experience in a command position. The way she was questioning me was rather reminiscent of my days in training when I was forever getting in trouble for things I hadn't done. Or the way Mr Holt or Director Worth had tried to draw answers to their questions out of me. "Nodoka-chan?"
The nurse prodded me, calling my name.
"Nodoka-chan?"
"Hmm?" I blinked and refocused, my mind feeling blurry. I lost my train of thought. "I'm sorry, what was that?"