Later on the week we finished the pool and used some concrete that was already at the farm to seal it, I was currently chilling in it alone at around two A.M after having another nightmare.
I heard some rustling behind me and immediately got upset, "Go back Tae." I basically ordered him in a stern voice, not even looking back at him, "How did you know it was me?..." He asked slowly getting closer to me, I ignored him and closed my eyes trying to not acknowledge him.
I heard him crouch down behind me as I laid with my back to the side of the pool having my arms resting against the sidewalk thingy completely spread out.
I inhaled sharply and clenched my fists onto the concrete feeling warm, soft hands gently and slowly sliding their fingers across my shoulder, slowly sliding their way across my spread out arms and making their way back to my shoulders to gently rub and massage them.
The only word I can think of to describe the feeling of his beautiful hands touching me so intimately... Euphoria. That's the only word that describes how amazing it feels to have him touch me, there's no hinting, there's no intentions, he's simply touching me. And it makes me desperate to feel his love again.
I slowly leaned my head back to point my nose up to the beautiful night sky as his hands gently rubbed my shoulders, "You called me Tae.... I haven't heard that in such a cold.... In years..." His voice seemed almost scared, "Why are you doing this to me jungkookie?... One minute you love me.... And the next.... Did you only want my body after all?.... Was I.... A fool?..."
My eyes widened at his questions, these are the same questions I've been asking myself, and now apparently he feels the same way?
"What do you want from me Tae...? I can't.... I can't understand you sometimes..." I said, hoping he'd clarify what I hoped to those damn gods he was thinking...
I heard a sniffle or two, and looked up at him and saw small tear drops falling from those pretty brown eyes, "I don't know what I was expecting... But you seemed to... Genuinely love me... You were so happy when we cuddled... You looked so cute when you smiled at me... You were... You were everything.... You made me feel like... Maybe all of our bad blood wasn't set to destroy us afterall... I thought you loved me for a moment..."
After waiting about ten seconds before responding, I decided that grabbing him and forcing him into the pool was the right thing to do?
I heard a gasp and could feel him holding onto my shoulders, I held him tightly as I began forcing him against the wall of the pool and kissing him aggressively, more aggressive then I've ever kissed him before.
I felt myself pull his pajama shirt off simply throwing it further into the pool, he was holding tightly onto me and moaning slightly but didn't even try to stop me. Allowing me to continue manhandling the clothes off of him, I was probably bruising him badly by how hard I was grabbing him.
His waist, his hips, his thighs...
Oh those thighs....
I kept aggressively making out with him for a long time and only pulled away when we were both out of breathe and rock hard horny, "I wanna do it, I wanna go all the way with you," I didnt bother waiting before immediately blurting it out, I could see he was shocked but i didn't give him time to respond, "i-i.... I fucking love you, I'm so fucking disgusting, I love you so fucking much I wanna- I want it to be you I'm sure of it."
I wasn't lying.
I don't know why, but hearing him begging me to answer if I loved him or not, just hearing how his voice sounded so cute asking me if I was simply taking advantage of him. I was finally ready to accept it and go all the way with him, he pushed the buttons I didn't know I had. He said things i didn't know I needed to hear, I just knew at that moment that this is the right time do it, and I wanted him so badly to believe im not the asshole monster that took advantage of his body and made him feel used, or abused, or upset or anything. I wanted him to love me, and I wanted to love him. I'm finally ready to accept that.
He nodded slowly and seemed suddenly very shy, "i-i wanna but.... It's my first time... Down there..." I smiled lovingly at his shyness and felt proud that I'd be the one to take his ass's virginity, and he'd take mine.
I kissed him deeply and much more passionately, slowly calming down and allowing myself to work more gently with him. Gently rubbing my hands over his body and squeezing his thighs softly, the tension had quickly changed from desperate kissing to intimately touching each other and getting more and more calm.
The desperateness quickly sliding away as I felt pure love and passion take over the situation.
I looked at him for a long time, gently rubbing my hands over his butt and going down to his hole, looking for permission before I gently pressed a single finger inside, already being underwater and not needing lubricant or anything.
I could see him flinch and grab a little tighter around my neck, making me flinch as well but quickly calm down, and almost immediately whispering, "At your own pace..." Close to his face.
I felt his hips move downward slowly, taking that as a invitation to push a little bit deeper, I felt him opening his legs more for me while hanging on my shoulders completely as his legs no longer reached the bottom of the pool.
I gently moved my finger up and watched as his faced pained a bit, I was a bit worried at first but decided to trust that he'd tell me if it hurt to much or if I was doing something wrong or if he didn't like it or I was going too fast.
Gently pushing back in I kissed his forehead and brought his body even closer to hug him, having one of my arms around his waist and the other one straight down to his bottom, and his whole body weight on top of mine while I buried my face into his shoulder and sniffed him.
I felt like my finger simply being inside of him was overwhelming, it's always been external for us.... This is new, and exciting and intimate, every time he allows me to try something new I feel so grateful to him for trusting me.
And now those feelings were heightened so much, I felt like I was actually being pleasured by feeling his inner walls clench against my one little finger....
I whispered softly into his ear, "Can I put another one in?..." Wanting to ask permission for everything I do beforehand, it'll maybe kill the mood a little asking every single little thing, but I'd rather kill the mood and make sure he's Okey and also enjoying it instead of doing what I want and accidentally hurting him or making him uncomfortable.
I heard a whimper and a soft, "Be gentle..." And gently kissed his ear, holding his waist even tighter as I pushed my middle finger inside as well.
I could hear him gasping and clenching around my fingers, and I gently shushed him and whispered sweet nothings into his ear, telling him he's doing good and that he can tell me any moment if he wants me to stop. But he never did, so neither did I.
I don't even know for how long I was using my fingers, but he was making such sweet noises as I slowly picked up speed and fucked him a little harder with each finger thrust. I could feel my hands trembling at the thought of sucking his blood, my thangs were out and burning with desire but i controlled myself carefully.
I slowly pulled my fingers out and looked at him, his eyes were teary and he was making such delightful faces... "Can I put it in...."
He inhaled threw his mouth and whiningly said, "Haa.... Ha... Nght.. please... I'm so fucking close please..." I smiled gently and hugged him again, putting my fingers back into him deciding that i shouldn't be in a rush, and that we had as long as we wanted so I could rather slowly get him used to it over time so I don't accidentally hurt him or have him tear.
I knew how badly I wanted to do it with him, but at this point I was so worried over him that I completely forgot about pleasuring myself, and only worried about him and his comfort.
I felt myself pressing onto his butt with my fingers and having his pelvis tightly against mine, feeling every little twitch and movement he made and gently rubbing myself over his stomach.
I heard a rather desperate yelp as I continued touching his prostate and rubbing over it in a way he seemed to like, and felt a sudden wave inside the water and looked down, noticing him crouching his back as he usually does when hes....
My face immediately flushed even redder then its been all night and I immediately pulled out and looked straight ahead of me, having no words and being absolutely dumbfounded even though I knew he'd do it eventually.
But there's a certain kind of feeling, pride? Shock? Embarrassment? I couldn't quite put my finger on it, but whatever it was was keeping me from making eye contact with the man I've just given an orgasm from the inside.
He continued making small noises and eventually started taking control, probably noticed that my brain was out of fuel and needed to reboot first, so he slowly and probably very struggling turned around and had himself pressed against the wall in the pool, his butt towards me.
He looked back at me with teary eyes and rubbed himself up and down over my hard drive, with shaky hands and already trembling bottom lip i gently touched his butt cheek and spread it open enough for me to even more gently press against his hole. But I was too overwhelmed to push it in and felt him using his hand to reach back and put it in position and slowly pressed himself down.
I gasped and grabbed onto the side of the pool feeling it sliding further in, somewhaf smoothly but I could still feel him struggling and flinching and clenching, "I was going to wait..." I whispered as I felt him stop for a few seconds.
"It hurts...." He mumbled, having his hand go back onto the wall to grip onto it as he kept his head down, I wanted so badly to pull out but I couldn't get my body to move at all if not to whimper or gasp at the unbelievably amazing feeling spreading all over my body.
I felt him pull his butt away gently but only about an inch away before he pressed back down having more of me inside of him, and having me moan even louder.
I felt like a useless statue, I was so freaking overwhelmed that I couldn't even touch him, I wanted to hold him, to caress him and take care of him but I couldn't even look at him without shying away.
He was trying desperately to move up and down and clearly struggling to fit the whole thing inside which is fine, what's not fine is the noises he made, making me even more in love.
He seemed to get better at it and eventually had the whole thing inside of him, and just rested like that for a few minutes to get used to the size, I slowly looked down and could see that his hole stretched out around me a noticeably impressing amount, given that I'm an alpha male it's obviously going to be big and was probably five inches in width, and he had me completely inside of him.
He didn't even have to move in order for me to feel euphoria, the way he clenched, the way his breathe moved his hips only a slight tiny bit. It embarrassingly made me cum inside of him.
The only thing I could do was look down in shock as he started slowly moving around my slowly getting smaller and softer tool, he seemed to like pressing in a certain way, and i made a point to memorize that position even in my state of useless robot that needs an update.
He slowly wiggles his butt down again pressing even deeper and having the sides of his butt press against my pelvis moving only a few centimetres at a time, I could see the white liquid oozing out and contaminating the surrounding waters, and again he just stayed there and didn't move.
At some point in the next few minutes my brain finished updating it's Hardwear and I suddenly started panicking, pulling out and grabbing him then letting go then grabbed him somewhere else not knowing what to do with my hands and visibly starting to have a panic attack.
I know that he tried to comfort me, but I blacked out pretty quickly and only remember a bit of crying and trembling not knowing where go put my hands and whimpering while trying to understand the feelings i was having.
Then waking up in my bed next to Taehyung holding me closely to his body.