I pulled back the nose wheel and let the main wheel touch down before hearing a thump as the nose gear made contact with the runway within a split second of coming to my senses.
"Drop the airspeed and maintain control on the rudder"
Erik sighed in satisfaction as the Skyliner slowed down and the airspeed decreased to 10 knots in less than five minutes. The rain was heavily beating against the windscreen.
"You did good, man. Now let's get her back into the hangar."
While taxiing into the hangar, we saw the ground crew ready to accept the plane, but what really caught our attention was Marcel's appearance, which was extremely unusual given that he rarely entered the airfield unless it was necessary.
"I-I-Is that a go-go-good sign ?"
"Nope, I think I know what this is about."
As the aircraft came to a complete stop within the hangar, we both followed Marcel as instructed by the ground crew to his office.
"Yep, we're screwed," Erik jokingly remarked.
"Jesus Christ, Erik, what the hell were you thinking ?"
"Sir, calm down. There's no need to panic"
"Of course, there is! What if something bad happened out there ? Would you take responsibility ?"
"Sir, he's a pilot. One day or the other, he's gonna have to fly in those conditions."
"No! You listen to me. He is not a pilot until he belongs in an airline! Right now, all I know is that he's gonna have a licence that'll take him nowhere."
"Then why do you give him hope ? Shouldn't you have rejected him in the first place ?"
"His profile was too good to turn down."
"What's the point of a profile when you weren't even convinced that he was going to do the job ?"
"Horizon recommended him. I know it's unfair but… I owed Jack Downey a huge favour. But he already knows that Rishab will never be able to get a job unless… Horizon's willing to take him in as a pilot."
"I think you're aware that a lot of the pilots in Horizon are over 50 or probably even retired, how do you think they'll…"
"Make an exception for him ? I know but that isn't my business. Once he has the licence, he's on his own. Listen, you're only an instructor paid to do his job and your job is to teach him, follow ATC commands and move on. We can empathize but some things are beyond control. You understand ?"
"Yes sir"
"Good. Now, get outta here"
My dreams were actually crushed when I heard Marcel say these things to Erik. My referral from Jack Downey, CEO of Horizon Aerosystems and a mentor to me during the early years of my career as an aeronautical engineer, seemed to be the only factor influencing my attendance at the school.
Erik discovered me sobbing in the hallway outside Marcel's office.
"Hey! Hey, why are you crying ? It's alright, Marcel was just mad."
"I'm qu-qu-quitting"
"Come on, man. Don't do this, you're so close to have the licence"
"FUCK THE LICENCE, ERIK! FUCK IT! F-F-F-FUCK THE ACADEMY ! FU-FUC-FUCK YOU! FUCK EV-EVE-EVERYBODY!"
I had never experienced anger of that intensity before. Although it shocked me, I was unable to contain my emotions since I felt that my entrance to Aerofly was totally contingent on the recommendation of one individual, even though I was aware that I was ineligible for the program from the moment I showed up for the interview. I clearly recall throwing the garbage can and crying in the parking lot until the Aerofly security officer stationed in front of the entrance took notice and came to my help.
"You alright, buddy ?"
"No-No… I wanna go home.."
"Okay, hold on, I'mma find you a Ryde, okay ?"
He left me alone, vanished, and then returned five minutes later.
"Alright, there's a Ryde on its way. I didn't know the destination so you're gonna have to tell the driver, once you're in."
I didn't say anything and remained silent.
"Buddy, I don't know what's going on with you but I wanted to be a pilot too."
He caught my attention after watching how I responded despite the agony.
"Yeah. I came to this academy with my background in Mechanical and for some reason, I never made it in. All I know is that maybe sometimes, we belong in the world but not in the sky… and that's why I'm here as a security guard… because I belong in this world of aviation."
I smiled at him gently and the cab showed up, ready to take me home. Before I left, he told me something that stood with me till now.
"Even if it isn't the plane, we'll always fly someday, okay ?"
"Wh-wha-what's your name, o-of-officer ?"
"Tanner." he smiled
The cab's shutters slid up as I bid goodbye to Tanner and proceeded to the exit, leaving me with no doubt that I wouldn't return. When I got home, Papa welcomed me with outstretched arms and deep sobs, saying
"You tried, Rishab. That's all that matters."
I went to see Sarah the same evening and told her about my exit from the academy. Due to my reputation with the CEO and my performance at work, she was persuaded that I had tried hard enough with piloting and didn't object, telling me to move on and return to Horizon. As the project engineer for the J17 that I had previously been in charge of overseeing before I left Horizon, Roger contacted Human Resources and asked them to reinstate me. The organisation concurred, and I was back in the warehouse designing propellers and checking the fuselage until one afternoon, Downey asked me to meet with him.
"Rishab, first of all, I want you to be clear that it solely wasn't my recommendation that got you into Aerofly, alright ? A part of it was your merit too but you got something nobody can fix. So, I'm sorry that it didn't work out but… HR got in touch earlier today and they said that we'll be needing pilots for shipping our aircrafts to delivery locations since we were slacking behind. "
"I ap-app-appre-appreciate you for telling m-m-me this, sir but I-I-I do-do-don't want to-to-to be a pilot, a-any-anymore."
"No, this is where you're missing the point. What if I told you that you can probably assist the captain on one of the planes as a co-pilot ? Does that sound.. good to you ?"
"I-It-It's illegal to fl-fl-fly without a licence."
"Flying is your dream Rishab. I'm trying to make that a reality. I know you don't like being on the ground."
"B-b-b-bu-but ca-ca-can you change my stutter, sir ?"
"Maybe not, but I have a plan in mind and if you just let me explain, we can work out something in the best interest of both of us."
"G-g-g-g-go on.."
"Rishab, this position won't let you qualify as captain. You'll be a co-pilot to one of the captains that work for Horizon and all you'll need to do is follow their orders and keep away from comms. You won't get a better package than this because we're running out of pilots and if HR is involved, they're going to stick pre-requisites and not recruit new talent"
"Y-y-y-y-you can st-st-st-st-st-st-still intervene, right ?"
"Between you and me, this company's at the mercy of my dad and I think you know what that means. I can cover for you if you agree to do this, no one's going to raise concerns given your prominence at Horizon."
I pondered on what he said. I knew in my heart that even though I buried my ambitions to become a pilot, a part of me still yearned to sit in the cockpit and fly aeroplanes all over the world.
"I-i-i-i-if I agree, h-ho-ho-how do we cover this up ?"
"I'm a lawyer by profession, allow me to take care of that. Are you in ?"
I agreed and nodded, but secretly I was still hesitant. I pretended to be delighted even though I could feel a chill running down my spine as I tightened my grip on Downey's hands. Descending the stairway and walking into the maintenance hangar, Roger strolled up to me
"Hey, you alright ? What happened ?"
"Oh, nothing. H-h-h-h-he was ta-tal-talking about my pr-pr-promotion."
"Damn brother, you're making moves out here."
I shook my head in unease.
"Alright, I'll see you at lunch."
I couldn't stop thinking about Downey's offer. I wasn't sure whether it was okay to tell Roger or my parents since I thought they might disapprove of something I've wanted to do since I was eight years old because I didn't have a licence. I was fully aware of the potential issues with something like this, but I chose not to worry primarily because Downey had pledged to lie if there were any doubts. I needed to talk to someone and just then, Sarah texted me about meeting for dinner, which I instantly agreed to and we met at Hal's Diner.
"So how's your week been ?"
"G-g-g-g-good. Y-y-yours ?"
"Been alright, a little stressful… So what's new ?"
"Well, th-t-th-t-there's so-som-som-something I wa-nt to t-te-tel-tell you"
"Go on.."
"My CEO c-c-c-called me t-to-today and a-ask-asked me if I w-wa-wan-wanted to fl-fly."
"But.. you don't have a licence, right ?"
"N-n-no"
"So, what are you going to do ?"
"I-I d-d-don't kn-ow."
As the waiter brought the food, Sarah stopped talking and went silent. Walking with her back home felt awkward and it started occurring to me if what I told her came off as a big mistake. When I made up my mind to stiffen up and inquire with her about whether I had signed up incorrectly to be a pilot for Horizon, we had almost reached the door of her apartment. She acknowledged that she was unsure if she had made the correct decision, but relied on me to be open and honest about it. I refrained from talking to her about my feelings because of her conflicting reactions and walked away.
Things didn't feel right, I couldn't tell if she was upset or worried, and I wasn't in a position to talk to her about it because I was already consumed with the idea of being a pilot illegally. I had to choose between being stubborn and telling Jack no and seizing the chance to pursue my dreams. There was no other option, and as I walked back home, I was unable to decide what to do. However, if school became difficult, Papa would always tell me one thing.
"If you have a problem, don't react immediately. Give your body and mind enough rest to make the right choice."
I arrived home exhausted and napped without an idea of what should be done. The next morning, I received a text message from Roger informing me that my first flight would be a J17 delivery from Kesling International to Fort Bedrin for a start-up airline called Air Dash, which would be piloted by Rick Jonas, a fellow retired Air Force pilot whom I had met the previous evening. Despite the fact that I had spent five years working on the fuselage of the J17, I had no justification for being qualified to fly the aircraft but I decided to risk it, anyways.
"I hear you're new from the academy." Jonas sarcastically remarked.
"Y-y-y-yes sir"
"Jesus, you really have a stutter problem, huh. Wonder where they find little shits like you these days."
The uneasy silence continued as we waited for our aircraft at the Skymark lounge. Rick went to use the restroom as I waited with baited breath, fearful of being discovered for not possessing a flying licence. My heart rate increased in response to Sarah's call at the exact same time
"H-h-h-hey"
"Rishab, hi.."
"Sa-sa-sarah I'm g-gl-glad you c-c-called."
"Listen I'm sorry about the other night, I called you.."
"N-n-n-no I… I.. am s-s-s-sorry. Other t-th-tha-than wh-wh-wh-what I wa-wa-was fe-fe-fe-feeling, I wa-wa-wanted you to know-know-know something"
"Okay.. what is it ?"
"Sarah, I- I- I love you."
During that time, the call was silent.
"H-h-he-hello ?"
She disconnected.
My emotions were heightened as I anticipated her reaction to what I said. Before Rick came back, I sent her a message to explain my situation.
"Hey. Not sure why you disconnected, I know it must be a lot to take in. This is the first time I've ever had feelings for someone and I wanted to let you know about this that night after dinner but you know, our conversation went in a different direction and I couldn't bring myself to say it. Hope you understand, can we talk ?"
Later, she responded to my message.
"Rishab, the reason I called you to dinner was because I wanted to personally let you know that I was getting married next month… I'm sorry."
"Oh…"
"I appreciate your honesty but I'm sorry"
"Me too.."