It's not often that I find myself believing a few specific things.
Santa Claus? Yeah, I don't believe in him. When I was little, my parents would always tell me tales about the big guy in a red suit who sneaks into people's homes and leaves gifts under the tree. My parents tell me that the guy used to snack on their cookies and gulp down their eggnog. He leaves a trail of snow and sometimes moves little elf plushies from their usual spots, but they always show up again the next Christmas.
At least, that's what my parents claim, but I always have a gut feeling that there's more to the story.
According to my parents, the man in the red suit makes a visit to almost everyone.
The sheer number of people he has to cover is overwhelming.
If he indulges in all their cookies and savors their milk, he would be completely satiated by the time he reaches the fifth house. There's already ten houses on our block. Additionally, the issue of laws adds another layer of complexity. I always see in the news that people face severe consequences if they dare to trespass into restricted areas. I'm so sure that the guy in the red suit is about to get caught and thrown in jail, like one house away.
The reason I stop believing in Santa Claus is when I catch my dad bringing gifts from his car and stuffing them in our garage. I also notice that whenever Santa Claus shows up on our CCTV tapes, he's always blurry. I've never once seen my father and Santa Claus in one room together, and that makes me wonder if they're somehow connected.
The world may label me as dumb, but I know better.
I'm the kind of person who believes that every seemingly magical thing in the world has a scientific explanation.
The rainbow doesn't show up with a path to a pot of gold. A rainbow happens when light goes through the water in the sky. That's why rainbows usually show up after it rains.
Making a wish on a shooting star isn't as simple as looking up, closing one's eyes, doing some finger-twisting, and scrunching their nose. Shooting stars don't actually make wishes come true. A shooting star isn't that big of a deal. I know it's just a space rock zooming through the sky and leaving sparkly light trails.
Nobody would actually kill their mom for stepping on a crack. It's just a superstitious thing about bad luck.
None of those things make any sense from a scientific standpoint.
The concept of trolls guarding pots of gold at the end of the rainbow is purely fictional. There's no such thing as wishes that come true, no matter how long one stares dumbly at a shooting star. A person's life is not and will never be intertwined with a haphazard fracture in the pavement that their child may come across in an unfamiliar section of the road.
All the tales I hear as a child turn out to be nothing more than illusions and make-believe.
The old woman's story is so far-fetched that I have to shake my head in disbelief.
There's absolutely no chance that what Lydia tells me is true.
The concept of a human transforming into a gigantic wolf is beyond the realm of possibility. That statement lacks coherence and logical reasoning.
Going back to what I've learned in my education, I can only conclude that the old woman's words are mere folklore, passed down through generations. It crosses my mind that Lydia might be getting fed up with my constant desire to leave, dragging Evan along each time.
It could be that the old woman's intention is to make me stop talking. Then again, I think, a human can't match the impressive feat accomplished by Kieran and Lydia just moments ago.
Kieran's eyes go dark like coal because he's so angry and frustrated. Kieran, he just grabs a chair and chucks it at the wall like it's nothing. Kieran, with his crazy strong hands, totally crushes my phone like it's a worthless old leaf. Kieran, the one who makes the steel bars of my cage shake and the ceiling feel like it's gonna cave in any second.
Lydia, who seems to have more knowledge than her age suggests. Lydia, she just walks up to me and totally crushes steel bars like it's nothing. I can't believe she's probably in her 80s. Lydia, with her kind smile, the scent of books and rainbows, and the comfort she gives me when Kieran is at his worst. Lydia, who doesn't seem like she's lying and looks like she's telling the truth and nothing but the truth.
I don't wanna believe it.
Of course I don't.
However, as time drags on and one piece of evidence after another unfolds before me, I can't help but shake my head in astonishment.
With a jolt of surprise, my eyes widen, and I scan the entire place in a frenzy.
I have no idea why, but an inexplicable urge to call out for Kieran washes over me. I have no idea why, but when the thought enters my mind, it feels as if a magical spell has been cast, and suddenly, the door of my makeshift dungeon bursts open.
Kieran's hands reach for me, effortlessly opening my locked door, and as he pulls me into his arms, I feel a wave of comfort wash over me.
I don't know why I find solace in the embrace of a man who possesses the power to end me in an instant.
"It's okay," Kieran whispers, his warm breath tickling my ear. "It's okay, Haven. I'm here. I'm here."
Tears well up in the corner of my eyes, and I shake my head once more, my mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water, desperate to express the words that remain unspoken. It feels as if my voice lacks the strength to release those words into the air.
And I can't understand why I cherish that small affirmation from Kieran, like a soothing melody in a chaotic world.
In that exact moment, I know I have no desire to be anywhere else but wrapped in his embrace.
"Please," I speak softly, my words coming out in a stammer. "Please, please, please."
I tightly clench my hands on the fabric of his shirt, cautiously looking up at him.
As he meets my gaze, my breath hitches in my throat.
I can't help but notice the tear stains on Kieran's cheek and his bloodshot eyes, as if he has been crying moments before. My heart twists in pain, mirroring the sensation of my stomach sinking, and I can't comprehend why.
At this point, I don't even know why my words are escaping my lips. I don't know what I'm pleading or asking for, my voice wavering with confusion. All I know is that there's a slight possibility that Kieran has the means to fulfill whatever it is I desire.
Kieran's face falls, and he avoids my gaze, unable to meet my eyes.
With a sigh, he gently brushes his cheek against the top of my hair. I'm taken aback by the intimacy and foreignness of the action, but instead of retreating, I stay put. Evan is the only person, other than my family members, that I have been this close to. It feels completely foreign to let a man, who seems to have stepped out of a fairy tale, get so near to me.
And yet, even with those thoughts swirling in my mind, I can't muster the willpower to distance myself.
"I'm sorry," Kieran breaks the silence after a few seconds. "I can't… I can't give you what you want, Haven. You can't leave… they… my pack won't let you leave. Now that you know the truth and all. It's a gamble to let a human out if she knows so much about us. It's all about keeping everyone safe. Just give me a minute to think, okay? I need to figure out what I want to do with you before I decide anything. Please see things from my perspective. I don't want you crying, but I'm in a tough spot."
His rejection makes my entire body tense, and I can feel my heart pounding in my chest at the way he speaks. Tears well up in my eyes as I sniffle, overwhelmed by the flood of pleas and requests swirling in my mind.
Kieran's hand hovers above the middle of my back, causing me to instinctively shuffle backwards until I find myself leaning against him for support.
Kieran's face remains impassive, hiding any surprise he may feel. In fact, he feels a wave of confidence from the movement, leading him to wrap his arm around my waist and bring me closer to him in a matter of seconds.
The room is filled with a gentle hum as I absentmindedly hum to myself.
My anxiety grows as I nervously chew on my bottom lip, my arms instinctively wrapping around Kieran's chest, my palms resting on the steady beat of his heart. As I feel his chest rise and fall with each breath, my own breathing gradually becomes steady.
I close my eyes, feeling a flutter of uncertainty as I do something completely uncharacteristic. I guess it's 'cause I'm exhausted. I can't find any other logical explanation for what I do next.
I let out a shaky breath and lean my head on Kieran's chest, my knees turning to jelly. Kieran's throat makes this strange rumbling noise again.
"Then please, I just want to get out of here, at least." I whisper, my arms instinctively tightening around him as Kieran's hand begins tracing soothing circles on my hip, instantly calming me down. "It's not easy to sleep in this place. The walls are freezing, my back hurts from this thin mattress, and the window doesn't block out the noisy animals at night. I'm even more terrified now that you've told me this and I'll be all by myself."
Kieran's body tenses up, like a coiled spring.
With a furrowed brow, I raise my head and fix my gaze upon him.
Instead of looking at me, Kieran's gaze is fixed on the window, his mouth twisted into a snarl. He holds me tightly, pressing me closer to his chest. I at first think it would hurt, but I'm surprised by the gentle, fluttering sensation it causes in my stomach.
"Relax, nobody's gonna hurt you. No way that's happening."
"Okay?" I blink, my eyes tired and weary, no longer desiring to engage in an argument. Everything is a jumble of mixed-up thoughts and conflicting emotions. "But I really don't wanna stay here."
Kieran blinks, his brow furrowing as he searches for an answer.
"It's not a good idea to go out--" He begins to answer, but his words are interrupted, leaving his unfinished thoughts lingering in the air.
In an instant, the silence is broken by the sound of someone clearing their throat. Someone, who has gone completely unnoticed by both Kieran and me, is there all along. I can't help but find it ridiculous how quickly I forgot my surroundings.
I used to be way better than this.
"She's right," Lydia chimes in, walking back and forth in the room. As she stares at the bed that Kieran proudly claims is a piece of furniture, her lips curl in disgust. "This place isn't suitable for someone like her."
With a click of his tongue, Kieran expresses his disapproval.
"Okay, what's your suggestion then?"
"I'm not suggesting, boy. I'm telling," At the same time Lydia grins, a fierce growl resonates from deep within Kieran. I'm way more interested in what Lydia is gonna say than scared of Kieran. "She doesn't have to stay here anymore, trust me."
"Why?"
"From today onwards, she's gonna be living with me."