"I think--I think we should stop seeing each other Courtney," My 'situation-ship' of nearly 6 months, Sam, told me as we sat at a table at a diner having dinner.
I finished swallowing my food then remained silent for a moment as my heart shattered. This wasn't at all what I was expecting.
"I found someone I really like and we've been seeing each other for a while," He explained.
I couldn't be mad at him, after all this was the kind of relationship we had initially agreed to, we were friends with benefits. We were never supposed to be anything serious, and we said if we found other people we liked we would call off our agreement. He was just doing what we agreed, but I made the mistake of falling in love with him. What's worse I thought he had developed feelings for me as well.Â
 I looked away from him and searched around the diner as I still processed what he'd told me. I was so embarrassed. My eyes then rested on the TV that was hung up in the restaurant on the wall. Playing was the news and it was talking about a recent discovery that has been made. "The Maxwell Foundation has made a major breakthrough in its research on coma patients. They have developed a drug that has shown promising results in the treatment of Coma."
"I hope we can still be friends, and that it won't be awkward at work," Sam continued averting my attention back to him.
"No, of course not I'm happy for you, I hope you and her are happy together," I lied to him.
"That's good to hear I enjoyed what we had, it was fun," He said.
If it was fun, then why didn't you choose me to officially be your girlfriend? Clearly, I wasn't. However, I remained calm.Â
Sam and I finished dinner then exchanged our goodbyes and walked in different directions. I hailed a taxi and made my way home.
Sam and I worked at the same place. After a group work dinner turned into a one-night stand that's when we began our friends with benefits. We'd never really talked much before then but I thought he was cute. I knew I shouldn't have accepted it knowing my relationship track record and how easily I tend to fall in love.
As our arrangement progressed we really began to get on well with each other we talked more at work and even had meals together. it seemed like we were becoming more than just friends I thought he asked for us to meet after work because he was really starting to like me and wanted to spend time with me but really, he wanted to break things off. but for some reason, I was under the very wrong impression he liked me.
I was hoping to get married soon but now I was beginning to think it would never happen. Sam was the longest relationship I'd had in a while though we had agreed to just be friends with benefits. I really liked him and thought he was starting to have feelings for me the way I was. But I was so wrong.
 As a 25-year-old unmarried salary woman, I was now tired of going through the same thing repeatedly.Â
The reality was I was bad in relationships. They never lasted long. Each time my previous relationships ended my past lovers all said I was great at sex but just felt we weren't right for each other. They never wanted anything more serious with me and would leave after a few months of dating. I couldn't understand where was I going wrong. Why couldn't anyone love me? Perhaps love just wasn't for me.
 Was sex all I was good for? I was certainly wrong for accepting Sam's deal but I was just so desperate to be with someone since no other kind of relationship was working for me. I felt like crying, but no tears would come so in the end I was just feeling frustrated with myself.
Would someone ever just be so obsessed and in love with me for once? Was that too much to ask?
I got out of the taxi when it reached my neighbourhood, I didn't want to pay him extra by making him drop me off right at my house. As the taxi drove away, I looked down the street, my apartment building was around the corner. I made my way toward it then went past the local bookstore which was on the way and stood still for a moment. I contemplated whether I should go in or not.
 Relationships may disappoint me but the one thing that's never disappointed me is a good book. I just loved to read about relationshipsÂ
I was so upset and bummed out I needed to read something to take my mind off Sam.
"Ah Courtney, Good to see you." The shopkeeper greeted me when I entered the bookshop. I often came here.
"Hi Steven," I greeted back.
"I want to close up in 10 minutes so please make it quick."
"Alight," I responded as I headed straight for the romance section.
As I scoured through the romance section looking for a book that would suit my tastes. I picked out two that I thought looked interesting and decided to find one more. Then an odd-looking one stuck out to me. Unlike all the other books that had colourful and creative covers, this one was fully black. Also, whilst other books had multiple copies of it, this one was the only copy left.
I pulled it out and to get a closer look at it. It had no description at the back and no author mentioned just its title written in gold. It read: 'A world of Tyranny'. My eyebrows scrunched up in curiosity. What a strange find, I thought to myself as I flipped through the pages.
I contemplated whether I should put it back or not. I mean it was in the romance section so was what I was interested in. was curious so I took it and
Once I got home, I took off my work clothes, changed into my comfortable pajamas, and sat down on the couch. I turned on the TV to see what was on.
and on it the news was on, "…The Harrison's Research Foundation has made a major breakthrough in their research of developing a drug to help in the treatment of coma patients."
Oh, this report again I thought to myself.
"The Harrisons are proud of this breakthrough and will be holding a banquet to celebrate, it will also be in honor of their 27-year-old son Maxwell Harrison who has been in a coma for the last 15 years after a skiing accident. Maria Harrison had this to say about the new drug :
"I'm so proud of the work we've done here at the foundation hopefully we'll be able to help many people in comas. After so long we're hoping may soon finally be able to wake up. I know many have told me to just put my son's misery to an end but I won't I won't give up on you Maxwell. I know you'll wake up one day" " she said breaking down into tears.
The Harrisons were well-known socialites in the country they owned an international multimillion-dollar hotel company. After their son went into a coma they became a national headline since , they started a research foundation for Coma to develop a drug to help people become conscious. It's unfortunate what happened to their son though. But after 15 years I doubted he would wake up.
 I flipped through some more channels till I landed on a comedy sitcom and watched an episode. Once the episode finished, I switched off the TV and decided to head to bed. I had work tomorrow morning so it would be best if I went to sleep early.
 In the covers of my bed, I tossed and turned for a while, but couldn't find sleep. I couldn't stop thinking about Sam. Unable to continue anymore I sat up in my bed and thought of what I should do. decided to try to read one of the books I'd bought. Even though I had work the following day, I couldn't help it.
I took out the three books I'd bought and tried to pick which one I should read. Two of them were the usual contemporary romances I usually read but the odd black cover book piqued my curiosity. I wanted to find out what the story was about so I decided to read that one first.