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Chapter 7 - Chapter 7 - Preliminary Poll

For the remaining time during Lisa's absence, club meetings were replaced with strategy meetings (with special guest appearances by Tomura Sensei). Kagami and Suzu were filled in on the popularity poll issue and it was decided that we'd inform Lisa once she returned, assuming she didn't know already (figured it was best to not worry her and let her rest). The first part of our strategy was to get a feel for the current mood of the school while simultaneously spreading some positive propaganda. I would go to the people to take a preliminary poll, and Suzu and Kagami would work on posters promoting good points about the club. 

On my end, I managed to record one hundred entries (a combination of students and faculty who participate/advise in afterschool activities). Here's a sample of how it went.

Poll entry #1 "First Year Student":

Quote - "Sakura-san's in a club huh? I got a fortune from Sakura-san once before the opening ceremony. She said the boy I'd fall for was a two timer, and I'd become "the other woman". Well she was right. How could she have known that was going to happen? Not possible right? That's why I think she MADE it happen. Somehow she made it this way. I just know it. Also, isn't she some kind of prostitute? Pretty sure I read somewhere that prostitutes gain magic by having sex with men. She had sex with men, took their magical energies and used it against me. Damn that mystical conniving prostituting bitch. "

Vote - Discontinue

Reason - Personal grudge against Kagami

Poll entry #2 "Second Year Student":

Quote - "I was living the dream. I had a girl on each arm, teacher's looking the other way when I cheated on schoolwork, underage drinking, I had it all! Up until a week ago the world was mine, but you ruined it. Meeting you ruined everything. The girl's left me, I got suspended for cheating, I'm not allowed to drink anymore, and now I'm part of a club….A CLUB! I used to be banging chicks, now I'm banging balls with a racket. It's your fault everything sucks now. You're bad luck, bad juju. Screw you and screw clubs."

Vote: Discontinue

Reason: Personal grudge against me and clubs

Poll entry #3 "Second Year Student":

Quote - "Discontinue a club that Lisa Auclair-sama is in? Do I even have the right to do something like that? I'm just her property aren't I? Her slave. I have no rights, no free will, hehehe. Know that I would never wish for her to lose her club no no. Sshhh! They are watching. They see and hear everything, don't you know that!? How could you ask me such a thing in broad daylight. No no no, I would never do anything to displease Auclair-sama or his eminence. No, no, never. I have no right. No right…."

Vote: Continue

Reason: Fear of Lisa Auclair and her Father

Poll entry #4 "Third Year Student":

Quote - "She's going after dude's balls my guy, their balls. That I can't abide."

Vote: Discontinue

Reason: Personal grudge against Suzu for allegedly targeting men's testicals

Poll entry #5 "Teacher/Club Advisor":

Quote - "Ya I'll vote to discontinue a club. Sure. What do I got to lose. Nothing, nothing at all. Burn it down. Burn it all down."

Vote: Discontinue

Reason: ?

Of the one hundred votes, only twenty percent were in our favor, and that was purely out of fear of retaliation. Suffice it to say, the school hates us. I mean, they still hate us. The thing of note however is that they don't necessarily hate the club itself or the idea of it, in fact they are indifferent towards it. Huzzah!! So it's not that they want to disband the club because they hate it. They just want it gone because they hate each of us individually….and on a personal level. That's not so….it's bad.

 ***

It's now Monday, Lisa has returned to school, and we have till Saturday to figure out a way to save the club. Sensei has just informed Lisa about the live poll that will decide our fate.

"What's the big deal? Everybody adores me. Haven't you witnessed how They kneel in my presence? There's no way they'd vote to get rid of the club of the great and lovable moi."

This whole time I thought she was used to how she was perceived and was using it to her benefit. On the contrary, she's delusional. She's taking others' displays of fear as ones of reverence. Time to face facts.

"That's not what the data shows….here, take a look at this."

 I show the others the results of my labor, laying out the many quotes from polled students and faculty members. Page after page of negative feedback.

"Seems to me that it's you three they don't like. I didn't see a single bad thing spoken about me."

"That's because they're afraid of you, or more accurately your father. The few people who voted to leave the club alone were afraid of what he might do to them."

"How ridiculous. Father would never do anything untoward to anyone."

For some reason I'm not so sure about that.

"Speaking of which, what's he up to? For someone whose influence was the main reason for the existence of our club in the first place, you'd think he'd be more invested in saving it. We can't get in touch with the guy."

"That's because my father's out of the country on business. He doesn't take personal calls during such times. It's unfortunate, but that's just how he is."

Interesting. I figured she'd be more broken up about it. Not having her dad in her corner during such a time. Guess her spunk isn't just for show.

"What Ken? Is there something on my face?"

"No, just…impressed, I guess?"

"Oh..as you should be?"

Lisa smiles pridefully not knowing what to be proud about. 

"Anyways, the preliminary polling shows that we are definitely losing the club if things stay the way they are. The one upside is that people don't have anything against the club itself. We don't need to change anyone's mind on that front, but we've got a bit of an uphill battle on improving our individual reputations. But before we get into that, how did it go with the posters?"

The poster that Kagami and Suzu made, copied, and distributed around the school grounds was actually quite cute. It had our club name, our club goal (a satisfying school life), and a heartfelt appeal to vote - all in pink and red coloring, pacifico font, and with a coating of rainbow glitter. A crystal ball, compact mirror, whiteboard, and dollar signs were hand drawn onto it. There was nothing about the upsides of our club, or what we brought to the table, but it did display a sense of innocence. Like a kid's drawing you'd stick on the fridge. It doesn't look good, but it's endearing somehow. At the very least the posters shouldn't be met with hostility. That's what I thought anyway. 

"No bueno."

"They all got torn down, scribbled on, or used as toilet paper in the bathrooms….there was one girl who really made a show of it. I'd never seen another person wipe themselves so aggressively before…."

Really? That sounds pretty rough. Was it really worth the paper cuts to make such a statement? How are they ever going to wash all the glitter out of there? 

"It was awful. Sorry...."

"It's okay Suzu. You'll get 'em next time. But now that that's out of the way, it's time to devise our next plan of attack."

Hopefully one that doesn't result in desecration and glittery buttholes.

"What do you think, Sensei? Any ideas?"

"Hmm. It's a simple one, but maybe your best bet. If you want people to see you in a better light, it's often best to show them your good side. Appeal to them with your strength."

Sensei says this while balling her hand into a fist.

"I'm not very strong", Suzu says dejectedly.

Kagami flexes and feels around her own bicep, struggling to locate it. 

Lisa is pondering something. Maybe it's her next move, or maybe it's her own lack of physical fitness.

"I don't think she's referring to physical strength."

At least I hope not.

"No, not necessarily. Each of you has something they are good at, a skill, in depth knowledge, vast resources, or maybe even a mindset. You each have something you can lean on that shows you in a positive light. You should use that, whatever it is, and whatever it is should be your strength."

"We should also keep in mind that we don't have a lot of time. We've got less than a week to turn things around. I think we should keep things simple and do like Sensei said and use our strengths. Agreed?"

Nods all around.

"Then let's talk strengths. Do you guys have any ideas? Kagami, how about you?"

"Fortunes. During lunch and after school. For free. People will like?"

"Hmmmm."

I'm not sure fortune telling is something people view favorably or not, but many are pretty superstitious. And it is Kagami's forte. There probably isn't anything better for her to do anyway. But we may need to add a little something.

"Okay that sounds good. You are a fortune teller after all."

"Ya."

"However, if you could, try to put a positive spin on it. If you tell them something good that they might like, it's more likely to make them like you more. If you tell them something sad or bad and it comes true, I don't think that's gonna help us."

"I don't lie."

Rather virtuous for a fortune teller. Maybe she is the real deal.

"You won't lie. I'm sure there's something nice you can divine in everyone's future, even if it seems small and inconsequential. Just think positive, happy, good things."

"Okay. I'll try."

"Cool. Suzu, what about you?"

"I don't know. Dealing with people is hard enough, but I'm not sure what I could do to make them like me."

"What about cosmetics or fashion?"

Lisa chimes in with a good idea. 

Lisa's more observant than I thought she'd be. Suzu's make up and overall style is always on point, she is a model after all, and she's always fiddling with that compact mirror of hers.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean you could give tips, particularly to the female students and maybe even some of the teachers. Point out a concealer that might help cover a blemish or clothes that might accentuate their curvaceousness. Common folk seem to love that sort of thing, or so I'm told."

It's safe to say Suzu's the most stylish and possibly best looking girl in school. That and the fact that she's a professional model should give her the clout for people to take her word on this subject seriously. I think Lisa's onto something here.

"Oh. That's a good idea Lisa. That kind of thing is my strong suit and it'll be good practice talking with people. I just hope I don't make things worse for us."

"You won't." I chime in.

"If I've learned anything about you so far it's that you take self improvement seriously and always step up to the challenge. If you just think of it as another way of bettering yourself I'm sure you'll be just fine."

"Yeah. You're right, thanks. I'm looking forward to it already."

"Good. Lisa do you have any ideas for yourself? I might have one for you, but…..it's a tad unethical."

"What is it?"

"I was thinking you could use your…"information network" to buddy up to people. Find out what they like, show some common ground, some camaraderie. Show the common folk you're just like them."

"But I'm not."

"Okay you're not, but it would help if people at least think you have some things in common. Things they can relate with you on or talk to you about, instead of just fearing you."

"Respecting me."

"Sure."

"Can't say I agree with the notion of being similar to the commoners, but you do have a point. The respect and adoration they have for me, the great moi, is creating a distance between us. They must be ever so lonely…..I'll do it then, I'll give the people what they want. Is that not the role of a noble? To appease the masses?"

Lisa is a sort of celebrity at school, one with influence, and she's rich, but she's not royalty. I wonder why she's so obsessed with being seen as a different class of person from the rest? A need to feel special? Does it have anything to do with her weak constitution or her dead mother? Why am I asking myself these questions? I don't know. I'm no psychiatrist.

"Uh huh let's go with that. So Lisa's going with operation appease the masses, Suzu's giving tips on clothes and cosmetics, and Kagami's giving out free fortunes. All that's left is to figure out what I'm doing."

Everyone else has an obvious strength that comes to mind, but not me. Nothing jumps out as being particularly helpful for our situation. If it was half a year ago I'd have an answer. It wouldn't be a good one, but it existed. But now it'll take some self reflection or maybe self discovery. It may be that I have strengths I haven't discovered yet. But these possible future discoveries don't help us in the present.

"What are my strengths anyway?"

What was meant to be an introspective question to myself was accidentally uttered aloud. Everyone began seriously searching for an answer, but the time it's taking them to come up with one is hurting my confidence. Come on Sensei! Didn't you say each of us had a strength? Me included?

"Ken-kun, why not ask around and see if there's any work you can do to help the other clubs or the teacher's that stick around after school. I'm sure there's something you can help with. Carrying boxes, filing papers, filling in for one of the sport clubs, that sort of thing."

"So you were referring to physical strength after all."

"Just in your case."

Wait, am I the loser of the club whose only use is manual labor and grunt work? Am I the dead weight? Me, the President!? How shameful! But the reality is that there isn't much else for me to do. I don't have any passions outside of my ideal school life, or any acquired skills I'd be proud to mention. My spirit, my drive, and my manly physique are all I can bring to the table right now.

"I guess that works. I don't have any better ideas. Okay. I'll see what needs doing with the other clubs and lingering faculty members. Maybe they'll change their minds when they see how hard working and benevolent I am."

***

OVER THE NEXT TWO DAYS(MONDAY AND TUESDAY)

Home Ec Club:

"How can we ever hope to make and enjoy delicious food knowing you've been here, or that you've handled the ingredients, or that you cleaned the utensils? Your existence spoils the food, the atmosphere, and our appetite. Leave."

Bonsai Trimming Club:

"I've told you before. People come to this club for tranquility and peace of mind. You will only wilt their souls as you will the bonsai. Now go."

Manga Club:

"Ah, my eye! It moves again! Beelzebub have you returned? Have you come to take back your birthright that dwells within me? The Burning Dark Flame of Algonon! I summon it and purge thee! Be purged! Beeeeeeew."

Judo Club:

"No."

Baseball Club:

"Honestly things aren't looking good. Not only is Koshien looking impossible, but we may not even win a single game this year with how bad we're lookin. The season's just started, but this team is just that awful. This was my last year too. I'd like something to be proud of when I head off to college. Some lasting memory that made me believe these last three years weren't a waste. But I probably won't even get that much…..If only our ace didn't fall into a deep depression after meeting that one guy on the first day of school. Wait a minute….you're not the team manager!? It's you! You're that guy! Get the hell outta here! You'll only make things worse! Or is it already too late for me? Oh No! "

Basketball Club:

"NOT IN MY HOUSE!!!!"

Smack Smack

"Let me get those for you…"

"NO!"

This time around the basketball club member threw up two basketballs one after the other, rejecting them both into the bleachers. I offered to retrieve the balls, but he refused me, sprinting to pick them up before I even had the chance. He put the two balls back into a bucket of balls and ushered me out of the gym.

Teacher:

"I don't want any trouble."

"I just want to help."

"I don't want any trouble!"

"Here, I'll carry those boxes for you."

"No way. No!"

In a hallway, a teacher was struggling to carry two large boxes filled with books and paperwork. He took a moment to rest when I found and offered to assist him. The teacher responded by taking the boxes, stacking them on top of each other, and bolting down the hallway. Stray pieces of paper escaped from the boxes and fell to the ground. They were student's turned in homework assignments. I made sure to collect them all and followed the teacher. I caught up with him at the teacher's office and handed them over. He immediately stuck them in the paper shredder.

"Weren't those important?"

"Not anymore they're not!" 

For the last two days I offered my services to both clubs and teachers alike. Over and over again I was rejected. Even Though I was offering to assist them with no strings attached. Even though I was offering free labor, they still didn't want me around. 

I guess my innate stigma is just that strong. Maybe I am as that manga club member said I was, a demon, a cursed forsaken being. What will I do now? Will what I do even matter considering how people see me? But isn't that the point of what I'm doing, to change that? To change their perception of me? But how? I can't just do nothing, especially as the club president. But if people won't accept my help what can I do? I guess there's still the tea ceremony club I haven't tried. Perhaps Shimizu-dono will be there. Worst case scenario, I can enjoy her tea once again as well as her angelic presence. Just thinking about it lifts my spirits. I am not yet forsaken. Please God let me receive Shimizu-dono's blessings.

"You're here!"

"Yes I am here. Hello Furukawa-san. Welcome. Please, come in and take a seat."

Shimizu-dono graciously welcomes me inside the tea ceremony club wearing the same yellow kimono she wore when we met. She directs me to a place for me to kneel on the floor, bringing out a red linen zabuton for me to use. 

It's customary to kneel on the floor when participating in tea ceremonies, but for people who aren't used to it, it can be rather uncomfortable. Shimizu-dono must have sensed I was one of such people and accommodated me with a cushion. How thoughtful. As I make myself comfortable, the other three young women present become uneasy. Of course, it's because of me. They whisper something to Shimizu-dono who is preparing my tea and she dismisses them. They leave in a huff, but do it ever so politely, scampering out of the room.

"I apologize on their behalf, Furukawa-san. They still have a lot to learn when it comes to accommodating guests."

"No apologies necessary. It's just how people respond to me around here or anywhere really. I'm used to it."

"Is that so? That breaks my heart to hear, but it does seem to be the case." 

Is she being sweet or was that a diss? I'm going to say it's the former. It's not her fault the truth hurts. 

"Speaking of which, my condolences to you on account of your club. I'm sure it's a very stressful time for you. Though, you probably don't want to hear this from someone who's actively taking part in causing you such stress."

"Ah, no. Actually, just you welcoming me like this, giving me tea, speaking with me, is helping me to de-stress. I appreciate it. The club thing….I'm sure you have your reasons…"

Not that I know what they are. Or maybe I do know and I'm choosing to look the other way. Anyway, this tea is really good! Something about the taste…it's cozy? Like grandma's house on Christmas eve, sitting by the fire. Sleepy from the sugar and warmth.

"I assure you that it isn't due to any disdain toward you or your fellow club members. Personally I see no reason why you shouldn't be able to enjoy your club."

"Then why are you trying to get rid of it?"

I surprised myself with the question. As if it just slipped out of my mouth. It's like someone else took control of my vocal cords and uttered the sentence while I was subdued by the cozy drink. Am I being sassy with this woman?

It's times like these that make someone believe they're schizophrenic.

"Because that's what the president wants and it's my duty to see her will become reality."

She adopted a stoic, proud, and intimidating bearing as the warm liquid met her lips. Her aura, one of an indomitable spirit and unwavering loyalty. 

Shimizu-dono does have the air of a lady samurai, or maybe a maid, or a samurai maid. If that were the case, she'd be the most loyal and dutiful being in existence. Now that I think about it, don't I also know someone with a ninja butler? Who wins between a ninja butler and a samurai maid? If I had to choose, I'd take the samurai maid any day of the week. 

"You must really admire the president."

"No, not particularly. In fact she possesses many unfavorable qualities."

Like the fact that she's a fujoshi?

"It's just that we've known each other for a long time and I owe her a lot. So even if she's being unreasonable, I'll do my best to help her."

"So you think she's being unreasonable?"

"In this case? Not necessarily…"

"But didn't you say…."

"Hehehe. I'm sorry. It was in jest."

"Oh. So she is being unreasonable…."

"Not necessarily….."

"Now you're just toying with me."

"Maybe."

This angel has a bit of a devilish side doesn't she?

"In any case, I'm sure she appreciates what you do for her."

"I'm not so sure…I only started assisting her out of my own selfish desire to pay her back. In truth, I might be nothing more than a mild annoyance to her."

She stares into her cup, expressionless, but the air has changed. It was as If I had stumbled upon the samurai maid bathing in the wilderness, weary from battle and naked without her sword.

"Maybe that's how it started, Shimizu-san, but after being together for years? I don't know what you owe her for, but I'd think if she's kept you around this long it's not by accident."

"It'd be nice if that were the case….but let's change the subject please."

I had stepped on a branch and alerted the bathing samurai maid to my presence. She quickly gathered herself and her sword and took a defensive stance. The window of vulnerability had closed. Time to retreat.

"Okay."

For the rest of our time together we mostly sat in silence, leisurely enjoying our tea and the brief reprieve from our struggles. When the tea was finished, our time was over. Leaving the tea ceremony club room, I left satisfied, not only because I had learned more about someone I admired, but also a potential solution to my problem. I had a way forward now, inspired by Shimizu-dono's past with the President. When she decided to help the President of her own accord, she did not ask for permission. So I shall do as she did. No more asking. Time to help these people whether they like it or not.

***