Chapter 7: In Which I Do Not Romance the Shadows
After that first success I spent as much time as I could on the roof singing and dancing for the moon. Gradually we grew more fonder, and more comfortable in each others' company, although I did not reach the stage of utter bliss that I did sunning myself. Mama said to give it time, and that making friends was a process.
The moon was also an inconstant companion, the intensity of her affection waxing and waning with the nights. As her light waned, meditating became progressively more difficult. When at last she hid completely, veiling herself in darkness I turned my attention to other things. The moon would be back, she promised, with a whisper. And I would greet the Moon-Toad under her next full radiance, confident in my ability.
Unless…of course, it was a cloudy night.
But if it was I would just not go. Simple. No point worrying over the rainclouds that were not even yet in sight. That was my own wisdom, not Mama's. I was becoming wiser as well as bigger and stronger.
Until that time I continued my training, meditating by sun and firelight, and sometimes looking up at the stars and wondering how I should come to know them. The stars were quite unlike the Moon. To begin with, they were all different, each one unique and beautiful in their own way, just like cats. They were so many, I would never be able to enchant them one at a time - even with nine lives I would not have enough time. At least I didn't think so.
I wondered perhaps if I should ask the moon? They spent so much time in the sky together, surely they must know each other? Although the stars shone dimmer when the moon shone brightest. Perhaps they did not like each other at all?
One advantage of growing friendly with them all is that one or other would always be there, the sun, the moon, the stars. Unless it rained. Or I was indoors. Or underground.
I put these thoughts away. These were concerns for the future. The idea of romancing the shadows was simply too uncomfortable to bear, I would deal with it after I had grown more. And before I could seriously think about enchanting the stars, the next full moon had arrived.
I set off to the moon-toad's glade with great energy, prancing on my paws, keeping a watchful eye out for wolves, or ghosties or anything nasty.
The night was warm with summer breezes and mercifully clear of clouds. Sticking my nose in the air, I tasted all the scents of the night: sharp pine, sap, loam, moss, water, squirrel droppings. My nose twitched. The moon was rising. I must go fast, but not too fast. Watchful, careful. Shadows on my mind.
The gleam of the rising moon limned the horizon, peeking out from between trunks and branches, following me as I leapt River's waters without difficulty, and padded on my way through the trees. By the time I traversed the marshes the moon's smiling face was staring up at me from stagnant ponds. I hissed at the wisps, and they backed off.
This time I arrived at the glade at the correct time, with my paws mostly dry.
The enormous moon-toad was awake, the rowdy circle of Folk were eating snacks on their toad-stools, and the three smaller obnoxious toads were chewing flies on their log.
"Back so soon?" rasped the not-godling as I stepped out from the trees.
She was bigger than I remembered, looming over me in all her great, sallow green and brown glory. I believed Mama when she said the moon-toad was not a Small God, but standing here again - it was hard not to tremble.
I stiffened my spine, and wrapped my tail neatly around my legs, bowing my head and deliberately ignoring the whisperings of the toads squatting on its back. Trying to ignore the the enormous white frosted wolf-cub that was seated on its haunches opposite me. I blinked, trying not to quiver. A tall owl swivelled its head to stare at me with a much too intelligent gaze. A grass snake, coiled politely to one side, its tongue flickering in and out of its mouth.
I gulped, my heart beating faster.
I had dreamed of finding other Awake creatures. Well, here they were. A familiar oversized moth alighted on a nearby crooked branch. It nodded towards me, the fake eyes of its wings creasing up in amusement. I nodded back, with great dignity.
"Good," said the moon-toad, looking around. The mud beneath its limbs slopped and glooped with her movements. "We are all here. Let us begin. You too Jenkins. If you are able..?" There was a hint of a question in that rasping voice.
Nodding my head, I trotted forward. My chest tightened in excitement.
The Small Folk on the mushrooms let out a great cheer. Several pixies were drinking from little wooden mugs, about the size of my Maud's thimbles. They clashed them together, whooping as I entered the ring of mushrooms. My ears twitched and I could not help but prance a little as I took my place among the strange assortment of creatures.
I tried not to look at the wolf more than necessary. He was uncomfortably close, with a long pink tongue and was panting slightly. I had never seen a wolf before, even a baby one. His yellow eyes slid sideways to look at me and then flicked back to the moon-toad. To my left, the snakes' tongue slipped in and out of its mouth, tasting the air nervously.
The only ones talking were the three toads.
"Oooooh, the cat is back," whispered one, loudly. As if she had just seen me.
"I really thought it would have been eaten by something," said the second.
"Is it really Awake? Its eyes are as dull as piss-mud," said the third. "Just like the other domestic."
All three of them sniggered.
Before I could retort, the giant toad shifted again, and cleared her bulbous, rasping throat.
"Greetings to my new forest children. I am Montadie. Some of you are known to each other, some are not." There was another pause as the giant toad scratched at her puckered skin with a long, moistened limb. I saw she only had three legs. "I welcome new students Nadders, Jenkins, Skol and Lavellan Vollj."
My eyes flickered across the assembled beasts, trying to work out who was who. It was impossible to tell, although the wolf was panting harder, a brainless smile quirking the corner of its mouth upwards. His tail thumped on the floor.
"For the newly Awake, know that is frowned uponto knowingly harm a cultivation student of a lower rank." Montadie's bulging gaze swept across the glade taking us all in one by one, and coming at last to rest on the three smaller toads, who shrank in on themselves a little but kept quiet. "Awakened, Radiant, continue with your exercises. I will attend to you shortly."
The three toads, the owl and the moth left to another corner of the clearing.
So that left the snake and the wolf, but who else? The moon-toad had listed four Awake. I sorely wanted to watch what the 'Awoken' and 'Radiant' did, but Monatadie was speaking again so I turned my head away.
"Now listen carefully. If you have questions I will answer them in a moment. The first stage of cultivation is to-"
Montadie's soliloquy was interrupted by a large, portly bird that blundered out from between the trees.
A goose. Several yards high it was the largest bird I had ever seen, larger even than the plumpest of my Maud's geese. Muttering apologies, she took her place with the rest of us. She had a long graceful neck and her feathers were fluffy white and grey. There is nothing fluffy about the expression in her eyes, which were hard as nails.
"Welcome Wuot," said Mantadie. "Meet your fellow students, Nadders-" She pointed to the snake. "Skol-" was the wolfcub, and "Lavellan Vollj." The moon-toad pointed to a small water-vole crouched near the ground. I had overlooked her, so tiny was she. The small rodent was round in shape, and covered in soft brown fur. Her head barely peeked out above the grass. I stared over at her with some interest. A squeaker that was Awake! Surely it would barely last a week?
Lavellan Vollj's head turned to look at me as if she could hear my thoughts out loud. Her gaze was sharp and… slightly unhinged.
I looked back to the moon toad quickly.
"And Jenkins."
"Hello," said the goose.
Montadie settled herself again, the glade trembling softly as she moved. "Welcome. As I was saying- the first stage of cultivation is to become aware of the qi currents of the world around you. Congratulations. Each of you Awoke and thought - I want something more. You didn't know what that thing was, just that you wanted it. Perhaps you could feel the shortness of your time on earth and felt that it was oh so precious? You wanted longer. Perhaps you dreamed of becoming immortal! You wanted to defy the very laws of nature that bound you to this mortal coil, you wanted to break the limits imposed upon your body by the natural order of things. Well, you are in the right place.
"I will teach you and you will call me Master. Some of you will succeed and grow into magnificence. Some of you will reach your ownlevel of Mastery. Some will leave, satisfied with what you have learned, and live long, healthy, disease free lives. Some of you will fall by the wayside."
The glade was silent, everyone's attention fixed on the toad.
"Some of you will die. This is how it is. Cultivation is difficult, requiring dedication, time and resources. Pursuit of greatness is not for the faint of heart. The cycle of life and death claims all in the end but the very lucky, very special, very hardworking few. And yet… There are elements within your control. I will teach them to you, and it is up to you to find out if you are brave and intelligent enough to put them to use. Ultimately, the path is yours."
She looked around at us all, so large were her eyes I could see the group reflected in them.
"Your task now is to grow - first you must strive to gather the qi that infuses everything around you. That infuses your own body. Once you are able to gather this qi, you begin the long, arduous task of bending it to your will. This is but the first step of many, running it through the rivers of your body free flowing."
My back twitched at the term river.
"Once you can successfully cycle the qi throughout your body, and have opened the first five of your meridians you will become truly Awakened, and officially pass to the next phase of cultivation. More on that later. As I said, we accomplish this in stages, some more difficult than others.
"It is important for me to explain that some of you will find some tasks easier, some will be more difficult. Do not gloat too loudly. Everything is in balance. For instance, you might think that carnivores are at an advantage when it comes to fighting? You would be right, but they might not be as swift or as careful as the prey they hunt.
"In the same way, those that devour meat might gain more power from those they consume than a plant eater. However, some plants are rich with qi, while others are mundane. Likewise prey. BUT-" We all jumped. "In order for qi to cycle properly you must rid your bodies of impurities. You are what you eat. A mouse who eats a rotten nut will get a belly-ache, a cat that eats a mouse that has suffered, or that is ill will take that energy into him or herself." The moon-toad's bulbous, solemn gaze swept over us all. "Plants are less likely to contain the stress and trauma of impurities. And so plant-eaters have less impurities within them. As I said, all in balance.
"All of you must cleanse. This is important! I cannot overstate the importance of this. The channels of qi will not flow through a dirty body. And to cleanse you must learn to breathe properly."
As if to demonstrate the enormous toad took several deep guttural breaths.
"It is not enough simply to pass air in and out of your lungs, wherever they are located. All of your bodies are built differently." The toad's eyes, enormous and glistening eyes bored into our souls as she casts her eyes over us, considering. The Moon too was reflected there, a constant, watchful reminder. She was watching us too. "This is a challenge for me, both as a teacher and guide, and to you as students. Every path is unique. You will all need different techniques not only to breathe, and to meditate, but to fight. For example: on an incredibly basic level, some of your bodies are small, some are big. Some have two legs, some have four. Some have no legs at all." We all look at Nadders, who sat up straighter in his coils. "Some of you have beaks, some have teeth, some of you have beaks and teeth."
The goose hissed, her bill parting into a hideous smile that revealed rows upon rows of serrated teeth seemingly embedded in her pink and red gums. I successfully resisted the urge to lean away. I would not be intimidated by anything wearing feathers.
"Some of you have wings, some are bound to the ground. Some of you are comfortable in water, others in the earth or on it."
It occurred to me then, that flying would be an extremely good advantage in a fight. I made up my mind then and there that I would learn how to fly as soon as possible. If birds could do it, how hard could it be?
"But I am getting ahead of myself," said Montadie. "As I said, you will accomplish this in stages. You can all sense qi. Congratulations. Now it is time for work. Gather it in. Let us begin."
Chapter 8: In Which Cannibalism is Not Encouraged
All five of us settled into our meditation poses. I tucked both paws beneath my body in a comfortable loaf, Nadders resting his chin atop his neatly coiled scales. The goose, bizarrely, stood on one leg, shoving her wicked beak into her feathers. I wondered briefly if she was playing, but apparently not. As Montadie said, we were all different, I guess.
Skol and Lavellan merely sat, eyes closed. But not before Lavellan's eyes met mine once more, narrowing in a most unfriendly manner. Hurriedly, I closed my own and stopped looking at the other students. I did not want to eat my fellow students. The tiny, succulently fat water-vole did not need to worry.
"Meditate until you can see qi," I heard Montadie say.
I breathed in and out, calming my excitement and determined to outshine my fellow students. Soon I was lost in that peaceful cycle, my chest rising and falling methodically. When I opened my eyes I could see the silvery disk of the moon floating over the forest, and let out a happy sigh. I could feel her attention but she was not just watching me.
The master moon-toad gleamed silver, the qi bending and flowing over her in visible drifts. Over on the other side of the clearing the moth's wings glimmered so brightly they were lit up like a beacon.
All around me qi coursed and flowed in ways that I had never seen before. It was particularly noticeable over by the Awoken and the Radiants but it suffused the entire glade, somehow contained and concentrated by the mushroom circle. I couldn't see exactly what the Radiants were doing but qi was clearly bending and swaying around their bodies in most interesting ways.
I looked away, concentrating on my own meditation.
Mixed with the moon qi were other strains, vibrant forest green, earthy browns, shadow grey - all different hues and scents. Moon and forest qi were the most prevalent however. I sat in peace for several long minutes, listening to my own breath, and watching the spellbinding patterns.
After some time, Montadie spoke again. Softly, hushed, as if not to break the spell of our concentration: "The next step is the process of cleansing your bodies, inside and out. Not an easy task, if your body is riddled with impurities, as no doubt it will be. This is the natural state, without cultivation so do not be alarmed. The more filth your flesh and blood contains, the more difficult it is to work with qi. The beginning of this process is to open your meridians. There are twelve in total, each connected to a different body system or organ. These meridians are the conduits, the great energy pathways within, markers that serve the flow of your qi. I want you to sink inside yourself and try to find these pathways, and markers."
I heard someone stir beside me.
"What'ssss an organ?" The snake asked. Weirdly, his voice echoed in the chamber of my mind, rather than out loud. The mind voice was drowsy but not a little sibilant. I frowned, a little perplexed, but managed to keep up the rhythm of my slow rhythmic breathing.
"Organs are important parts of your body - things like your liver, your brain, your skins, your eyes, and so on," replied Montadie, as if this manner of communication was quite natural. Could I speak without sound? The meaning appearing in someone's head? I had never tried but I didn't think so.
"Why did he…why did he speak like that?" asked Skol, the wolfcub. His head was tilted questioningly to one side. "How?"
"Nadders is mostly deaf," said Montadie. And this time she spoke aloud and telepathically, the voice overlaying itself in my mind and ears. Presumably so Nadders could hear. "However he has developed other…means of communication. He is particularly sensitive to vibrations. Telepathy is not a skill usually developed at this stage of cultivation. Nadders is quite gifted."
We all looked over at the smug adder, his tongue flickering in and out of his mouth in a pleased fashion.
"Keep breathing. Do not let conversation interrupt your mediation."
I did not need this reminder, having complete control of myself, but the goose, the wolf cub and the squeaker all hurriedly shut their eyes again.
Montadie continued, as they fought to regain their concentration.
"As I was saying: there are twelve meridians and twelve stages of Body Cleansing. Each meridian has a particular function, linked to the body part or organ that it is connected to. We will work on them one at a time. Some are easier to open than others. Some are challenging. But beware, you must push and strive, yes? But to force an opening before you are ready can be fatal. To do it correctly takes time, effort and energy. Dedication. Patience.
"I look forward to the challenges your varied forms present us with. For example: the heart that pumps your blood around your body, this is an organ. All of you here, today, have hearts, which is not true of some of my insect students. Those of you with warm blood have four-chambered hearts, while Nadders here has three, and his blood is colder. Nadders, you will likely struggle more than the others to open this meridian. But as I said before, all things are in balance. You only have one functioning lung, whereas the others all have two, so likewise the lung meridian will be an easier task for you. Each of you will have unique challenges, affinities, and trials but beware, beware, I cannot say it enough-" Montadie let out a great sigh, and shifted her limbs in the squelching mud. "Do not grow overconfident. Once I had a student with thirty-two brains, but alas..."
"What happened to them?" asked Lavellan.
The enormous, gleaming toad let out another sigh. This one loud enough to rustle the leaves of nearby trees. "Thirty-two brains, two hearts, five pairs of eyes, ten stomachs and eighteen testicles. One body. What happened to them? Not enough intelligence. The irony. They died trying to open their brain meridians before they were properly prepared." She glared around the clearing at us. "Take this as a warning. Do notfollow the path of the over-confident leech! All those brains and yet not one single drop of sense! There is a time for bravery, there is a time to push, but take care that you do not doom yourself from misplaced bravado! Immortality is not for the stupid. Where was I? Ah yes.
"Meridians. Open five, six, and you are truly Awoken. Now, enough talk. Feel your bodies. Look inside yourself. Call the qi into you. Breathe it in, become one, let it flow. Map the path, weak and blocked though it will be. Some of those blockages will be as a beaver builds a dam across a stream. There will be tiny gaps. Do not push, instead - be the water, flow with the stream, find your path. Are you ready? Then breathe."
I really did not like all this talk of water, but I suppose it was inevitable when my teacher was a toad. I shut my eyes and did as she said.
I felt the qi, drifting through the glade.
The motions were indeed, like a current, I thought uneasily, an undertow, simultaneously evasive and snatching at me. I could feel it brushing against my fur, against my nose. I would master this, I would not be buffeted by something so paltry, I would have control.
I tried to grasp it with my mind, pulling it inwards.Get inside me! My concentration shattered like one of Maud's earthen plates on the stone of the cottage floor.
My eyes snapped open.
"Again," said Montadie, as if she was privy to all my thoughts. Perhaps she was. Or perhaps it was to be expected. The thought annoyed me.
I set my breathing in motion once more. My concentration was again tested when the moth and the owl started tossing balls of incandescent qi to each other. The orbs of pure energy hurtled this way and that in a soundless battle of wills. The movement sent out ripples of disruption that I could sense as well as see if I opened my eyes.
After a few minutes I managed to successfully block them out, even though it was an uphill battle. The ball was hypnotising. My paws twitched for me to pounce. No. Breathing.
My mind cleared.
I sank deep inside myself, feeling my body, my toes, my tail, my whiskers, the hair that coated my skin. The pleasant warming sensation of qi filled up inside my belly. Cooler, and more subdued than that of the sun, but still a growing fondness. Carefully, softly, I felt once more for the current. I could sense it clearly, but every time I tried to touch it with my mind, my concentration wavered. Doggedly, I tried again and again, keeping my breathing steady, inviting it inside me, trying to breathe it in.
At last I coaxed a slither into me, by imagining it whooshing up my nostrils.
Once it was inside I almost lost it again, so strange was the feeling. Tickly. It pooled in my belly like cool liquid fire, the happy spot of my cultivation swirling into a ball that I could feel. Now to cycle it through my body. Where was the path? There were channels, strange and unfamiliar. Slowly, carefully I nudged the qi along.
Somewhere, outside I could feel my body sweating from the effort.
The qi moved, slowly, sluggishly, feeling its way along my body. Down my legs, across my chest, along my stomach to my back legs, then up and down the tip of my tail. I coaxed it along as best I could. I could sense blockages, dimly, chokepoints in the darkness as I felt along like a blind squeaker. Sooner or later the qi completed a complete circuit of my body and I let out a gasp. How long had it taken? I could not tell. I would do it again.
The second time was easier, but not by much.
I was dimly aware of the passage of time but it did not matter. This was too interesting.
When at last I opened my eyes, the moon was sinking low into the treetops of the western horizon. The bulk of her luminescence was already obscured by the branches and the forest was full of chirping birds. It was nearly dawn, I had been in the glade all night.
The next thing I noticed was the stench.
It was rancid.
It was rank.
It was worse than the nanny-goat, worse than Maud's outhouse on a scorching hot day, worse than the worst smell I had ever smelt in any of my lives. I could taste it in the back of my throat. I immediately vomited up the remains of my supper into a neat pile in front of me as I realised the stink was coming from me.
Every inch of my once pristine fur was clogged with the most disgusting, foul smelling filth I had ever seen in my life. Streaks of black and brown, even yellow, a little purple. What was it? With a yowl of distress I rolled in the dew-wet grass and rolled and rolled, trying to get it off me.
It helped a bit. I rolled some more, coating myself in the boggy muck of the glade but any smell, even dirt was better than that stink. Once I had got off as much as I could I rolled on dry grass then set about washing with utmost urgency. As my tongue made contact with the remains of the revolting stuff I gagged again, but forced myself to keep going. I had to be clean. This was not acceptable.
It tasted as disgusting as it smelt. I had to stop every now and then to puke out any bits I had accidentally swallowed. With copious amounts of spit and paw action it slowly started to come off. I was dimly aware of the others rousing around me, all of them just as filthy.
"Sod this for a lark!"
A distressed goose disappeared into the trees with a series of agonised honks. No doubt she was searching for water. For a brief, crazed moment I contemplated dunking myself in River on the way home. Then I came to my senses and kept cleaning.
"Well done," said Montadie to us, as if we were not all suffering agonies.
She chuckled, and the glade floor bounced a little. "Better out than in! Just think, all those impurities lived inside you. And more yet to be expelled. Congratulations! You have made a start. A great step forward. Practise your cultivation as much as you can, and I will see you all beneath the next full moon to evaluate your progress. Take care, my students."
With that, the glade rumbled, and the giant spirit beast sank back into the forest floor.
Chapter 9: In Which I Hug Trees
It took me many hours to get my coat properly clean. I felt quite sickened all the while, and my stomach ached from vomiting. The three mean toads muttered something at me, hopping and taunting but so frenzied was my washing, and so distressed was I over the state of my fur that I ignored them like the gnats they were. When at last I looked up, they were gone, and all the other students with them.
The sun was rising gold, warm and friendly through the forest branches. It shone down on me, proud of my achievements, bathing me in radiance. The trees were full of birds, all of them greeting the dawn, and their breakfasts. My stomach rumbled. I was hungry too.
The last tiny pair of Folk staggered from their mushrooms drunk and yawning, their twiggy arms draped around each other for support. There was no sign of Montadie, though I knew she was there, resting just below the surface. The stench of our cultivation was gone also, cleaned up through magical means I had no doubt.
I set off into the singing trees at a trot feeling…a little strange. Light-headed, light-footed, and hungry. Very, very hungry.
I hunted two fat birds without too much trouble, then a couple of squeakers along the way. They took the edge off. I remembered to ask them if they were Awake before I ate them, but none of them were. Not that I thought anyone Awake would let me catch them so easily.
When I eventually arrived home, Maud greeted me with gratifying cries of consternation. She scooped me up in her arms, embracing and examining me, cooing and prodding and talking, poking to make sure I was unharmed, which of course I was. I basked in the attention, then sank into sleep as she rocked me, fondling my beautifully clean ears.
At some point she must have decanted me into the wool basket by the window, because I woke up there. I was not too offended, since I had slept deeply and well, and it was now late afternoon. My belly roared as I stretched. Once again it was demanding to be fed. Why was I so hungry? The cultivation must have taken more energy than I expected.
Maud had left me some meat scraps on the kitchen table, which was very thoughtful of her. I ate them, then went out to check on my domain. Everything was as it should be, although if I must be honest it was a cursory check. Then I fell asleep under the daisies, breathing in the heady scent of the happy-mint.
In my dreams I excitedly regaled Mama and my siblings with the tale of my night in the glade, and of Master Montadie and the other students. It was most gratifying to see the expressions of wonder on my brother and sisters' faces.
"A vole? A water squeaker? Surely not?" cried sister-white-socks disbelievingly. "A moth? Surely you are making this up?"
"I most certainly am not making it up!"
We glared at each other and started to wrestle. We went rolling over and over in a tumble of biting and slapping.
"It is true," says Mama, over our wrestling bodies. "Any creature can Awaken. Even prey. Even a squeaker or a flyer."
"What about a worm?" asked tabby-brother. "Or a crawler?"
"Or a… or a fish?" asked tabby-sister.
"Even them," said Mama. "Cultivation is ultimately a rebellion against the natural order. Cats are naturally rebellious, making us naturally more inclined to question, and so to cultivate. We are born knowing we are superior. But others Awaken too, for different reasons. Anything alive can experience a spark of wanting, or wondering."
We all digested this in silence. I gave sister-white-socks one last bite and then it was time to wake.
That night I danced and sang for the Moon, and meditated on the thatch. Just meditating. I was not quite ready to try cultivating again. But I knew I only had a month before I would return to that glade. I knew I must, even if I was concerned about the disgusting filth matting my fur.
The thought that all of that that was inside me was equally repugnant, and drove me to practise. I wanted it out, as soon as possible. I wanted it all out, I wanted to fly, I wanted claws sharp enough to slice water… So I chose my spots with care, making sure there were plentiful quantities of damp grass available to aid my cleansing, and I cultivated.
The second time was still disgusting, and the third, and the fourth and the fifth, but by then the impurities were not quite so thick nor as plentiful. It was still a trial, however, and I still awoke hungry without any other obvious improvements. But Mama said they would come with time so I kept at it. I became an expert at cleaning myself up, and I learned not to eat beforehand, since I would be expelling the contents of my guts whether I liked it or not.
I alternated cultivating by moonlight and sunlight. I did not want to cultivate by firelight because I had an inkling it would distress my Maud if my body started seeping gunk in front of her. Or on to her for that matter. She was very prissy about dirt on her clothing and I disliked it when she became high pitched. Explaining to her that sweating out the impurities was not only necessary but beneficial, was beyond our current means of communication. So firelight would have to wait. That was fine, there was no fire in the glade. Moonlight cultivation was still challenging, but slowly, slowly, it became easier as I was able to concentrate more and more. Unsurprisingly, I made the most headway lying in the sun surrounded by the heady scent of the happy-mint.
The days of the lunar cycle slipped away, in a haze of mint and summer scents, and bathing, and soon it was time to return to my lessons in the glade. Mama suggested I take a sprig of happy-mint to Montadie as a present, and so I did.
I trotted through the woods with a large piece clenched between my teeth. The scent was glorious, whooshing up my nostrils, making my eyes feel like they might fall out of my head with the intensity of it all. I tried hard, and failed utterly at not getting high on the journey. The forest swayed and danced around me, and I pranced with it. Once or twice I walked into a tree. I apologised politely. So happy and content was I that I jumped River's width almost lazily, not even minding when I dipped one whole leg into her waters up to my thigh.
Giggling madly as I sprinted into the bushes beyond and I could hear her laughing behind me as she splashed. I decided, just maybe, River wasn't so bad. Or was it the mint affecting my judgement?
An unmeasurable amount of time later, I bounced into the cultivation glade and spat the present out at Montadie's feet.
"A gift?" rasped the enormous spirit-beast, her bulbous glass eyeballs rolling and sparking little pink stars. Did her eyes always have little pink stars? I couldn't remember. She took in a big sniff and glowing flying birds swooped out of her nostrils cawing and cooing. "My thanks, little shadow."
She consumed the happy mint in one quick gulp.
Her tongue was so quick I almost missed it. I blinked. It had not occurred to me to eat the happy mint and now I really, really wanted to eat it.
"Watch out for other plants that are qi infused," says Montadie to the glade at large, after swallowing. "This particular one brought by our clever friend here-" I beamed, and the three mean toad girls glared at me. Their googly eyed ire washed over me like a nanny-goat's fart on a windy day. "-was nepeta. As you can see it has a particularly strong effect on felines."
I grinned some more and tried not to sway.
The little pink stars were flying around my head on dazzling little butterfly wings and it was hard not to watch them. My rump was also clearly planted on the ground but the ground was definitely moving by itself. The qi in the glade was so thick I could taste it. I took a sneaky gulp.
"The scent helps relaxation but consuming it aids the cleansing of your arteries, veins, bones, and marrow. Qi infused plants like this acts as a lodestone for impurities, enabling them to be ejected in greater quantities. Look out for them - there are others. Some of them even grow in these woods. They are rare but you can find them by the great concentration of qi in their roots, or foliage. Of course you need to be cultivating to see them." The giant toad grinned. "If you are unsure of their properties, or their aspects, bring them to me before ingesting them."
There was a low hum of conversation amongst the new students. The Awoken and Radiant have clearly heard this lecture before. I wondered if they knew where all the qi infused plants were. I was willing to bet quite strongly that Maud knew many of them. She was quite a handy giant to keep around and not just because she was really good at tickling under my chin. I made up my mind to sample all her magical herbs.
But Montadie was not finished. She looks around at us seriously:
"A word of warning to you all - a second warning for your second lesson, Jenkins. As you progress in your cultivation you are infusing your bodies with more and more qi. Yes? This is the goal. Do not be naive. By infusing yourself with qi, you risk becoming prey to others who likewise wish to aid their own cultivation by consuming qi enriched food." The enormous toad leers at us, her mouth, already impressively wide, tilting up into a maw of impressive proportions. "Already, your flesh is more purified and tender than that of the unawoken."
I could not help it, I glanced at Lavellan Vollj. The water vole glared at me through her brown squeaker eyes. I smiled. But then I became aware that Skol was looking at me with the same expression. How dare! The fur on the ridge of my back rose, and a low growl rumbled up my throat as I, in turn, glared at the wolf-cub.
Montadie laughed at us.
"Know that any of you who eats another student of this sect will be banished from the glade forever after. But there are others who I cannot discipline. Those are the ones you need to watch out for."
"Others?" asked Wuot.
"Others," said Montadie, and her lips pressed together, as she refused to elaborate further on the matter. "But enough of this. Let's see how you have fared in the time you were given."
We shuffled into position.
I was happy to cultivate and confident in my ability, knowing I had practised well. Some of the other's had not practised as much, and I enjoyed listening to them being scolded as I sank away into the trance of my breathing.
The next few hours passed pleasantly enough, as I chased qi around the now familiar channels of my body. The warm mint induced haze of happiness was wearing off, which was probably for the best because Montadie said she would be starting our physical training tonight. I would need all my faculties and my sense of balance.
The moon-toad was unhappy with Skol and Wuot's cultivation, and set them to continue their meditations while she spoke to the rest of us.
"I can guide you only a little when it comes to developing a fighting style," said Montadie. "I suggest you seek other martial masters with physicality closer to your own. Although I can teach you some basics."
"Why is that, master?" Asked Nadders, his voice oily in my head.
"My clan's style would not suit your bodies," she said simply. "The Way of the Rotting Log is made for bodies with sticky tongues - Nadders, you have a fine tongue but Jenkin's and Lavellan's are short and stumpy. None of yours unroll properly. Nadders' skin is covered with scales, while most of you have hair, instead of sensible mucus." She flexed one enormous spongey leg, showing off the mottled, bumpy, oozing skin. "None of you can absorb water through your belly and you have zero poison glands. Well, Jenkins and Lavellan have no poison glands," she amended, smiling at Nadders. "But do not fret. I can get you all started, and perhaps point you in the direction of suitable masters. First you must learn as much as you can from this Montadie. I will not send you into the wild unprepared."
"I already have a training schedule," I said proudly.
"Oh?" said Montadie. "Show me how you 'train'."
Eager to show off I scampered around the glade, leaping and twirling, and running. I hugged my way halfway up a particularly tall beech, before making a sharp turn and sprinting down the trunk face first, so fast my body's weight had no time to catch up.
After I felt I had shown off my skills satisfactorily, I came to a stop, panting, in front of Montadie. I can hear the mean-toads snickering in the background from whatever it was the Radiants were doing in their corner of the glade.
"Too wild," said Montadie, frowning down at me. "While I can see you are enjoying yourself immensely, this physical activity looks more like the playtime of a child than the training programme of a novice cultivator."
The toads could not contain themselves, their laughter spilling out across the trees.
Lavellan snickered something about me being a kitten. As if that could ever be an insult.
"Jenkins needs discipline," Montadie swept on, disapprovingly. Her eyes roamed the glade disapprovingly, and the snickering stopped. "You all need discipline. Jenkins, you need to train with deliberation instead of running around wherever you please. For now, focus on one activity at a time. Run as fast as you can, see how far you can get before an hour passes. Repeat the exercise daily. Every day, strive for further. This way you are focused, and your progress is measurable. Do you understand?"
I nodded. I felt in no way chastised. None of the others had even attempted their own training regiments, except Lavellan. The tiny water-vole's fight style was heavy based around punching and biting. She was vicious, but had almost no reach. Most of her sparring partners could simply step on her if they were fast enough.
I had a feeling that Lavellan might actually be the most aggressive of all of us, except, possibly for the goose. It was hard to say, till we actually fought. Training against them would be veryinvigorating, even if the idea of trading pointers with a wolf was a little alarming. But then, the rest probably felt the same way about fighting me.
We lined up and Montadie had us show our fighting stances one by one. Of course, all of them were different, so it took a while for her to go down the line. When she got to me she subtly adjusted my feet, and my shoulders.
"There," she said. "Now hold it."
I never knew that just standing could be so difficult.
Then we practised basic strikes.
"Those of you with teeth," said Montadie. "Never bite something unless you are sure you want a taste. Be careful where you put your mouths." Wisdom indeed.
A short while later we were all shaking with exertion. My limbs ached in a way that I never knew was possible. My shoulders ached. My back ached.
"You are all thinking too much," snapped Montadie.
"How are we supposed to stop thinking?" growled Lavellan.
"Do you think when you breathe?"
"No," said all of us, except Skol who said "Yes." I looked at him.
"Sometimes," he amended quickly.
"Do you think when you run?"
We all paused, considering.
"Do you understand? You have all run so much, or swum so much, or flown so much that the actions have become second nature. The movements are burned into your muscle memories."
"But-"
"Of course you should use your brains during a fight, to analyse your opponents strength and weaknesses, to strategize, but to do that you should not be thinking about each and every movement you perform. That should be done by instinct. To get those instincts? There is no simple solution - repeat the movements, over and over and over, until your body understands them as well as breathing, until the movement is part of you. This is why practice is important. The rhythm of fighting is an instinct, you need to be able to trust your bodies but you can only do so with adequate training.
The giant toad surveyed us all.
"Mental stillness is what separates a novice from a veteran. Now let's see what you can do. One more time."