As I drove home, I kept breathing heavily and never seemed to catch my breath. Once I got into my apartment, I kept pacing back and forth in the living room like one possessed. I couldn't stop the tears from rolling off my cheeks, I kept asking myself the same question over and over again. What have I done? why did I let this happen?
The sound of my ringtone jerked me out from my panic, when I reached for it and saw the caller ID, the panic began allover again. I've never been so scared of a phone call. Why was she calling? Did Femi confess what happened between us to her? Did she perhaps pick up the scent of my perfume on him or was she able to decipher the trail of my lipstick on his lips? I threw the phone on the couch, ran into my room, threw myself on my king sized bed and began to cry. Why did I ever let this happen? Jasmine has been my best friend since secondary School and we trusted each other. why did I fall Femi's whims? Of all the men in the world , why was it him? I cursed myself for being stupid.
I should come clean and tell her I told myself, she's my friend and she would totally understand it was a mistake but a little voice in my head told me I was being stupid. "You kissed her husband, do you really think she would understand?" I knew the voice in my head was right, My telling her would definitely put a strain on our relationship, she wouldn't understand, no one would. I bursted into a series of new tears, i could still hear my phone ringing in the living room but I ignored it till I fell asleep.
# # # # #
When I woke up, it was almost dark, i stood from the bed and went into the kitchen to make myself a cup of tea. While I set the water to boil, I went into the living room to get my phone. I picked it up and saw five missed calls from Jasmine. I called her back making the final decision on how to handle the situation.
"Ifeoma, where the hell did you keep your phone? I've been calling all afternoon. my husband told me you came around" The sound of her jolly voice broke my heart.
"I'm so sorry babe, i went to see my mum and I forgot my phone at home. I just got home now. yes I came over to your house from the salon but your husband said you took the kids to the mall. I should have called before coming" I said it all in one breath hoping I sounded normal and the hint of betrayal couldn't be heard in my voice.
"It's okay, we can still hang out tomorrow. I'll come over to yours after church"
"Tomorrow can't work, there's this family meeting we're having tomorrow and I really have to attend. I'm so sorry babe"
"No, it's okay, we can hang out next weekend. Just take care of yourself. I know you're still having a hard time after your breakup with Uche. I just want to to know I'm here for you anytime"
"Awwn! Thank you so much. you're such a sweetheart. I love you"
"I love you too. bye" she said and I hung up the phone, and wiped the fresh tears that were streaming down my eyes. Jasmine is such a sweet soul and she really doesn't deserve me. I know I made a mistake but I wasn't going to let it ruin our friendship. I'll just pretend this never happened and make sure it never happens again. I wiped my tears, smiled and told myself that I would surely get over this.
# # # # #
As Jasmine kissed her two girls goodnight, she couldn't help but be thankful for the bundle of joy these cuties brought her. Admist all the pain and heartache she has been experiencing, her kids were the only thing that brought gleams of happiness in her life, they were the only good thing her marriage gave her and were one of the reasons she stayed with Femi. She didn't want them to grow in a broken home like she did. She wanted her kids to have the home she didn't have no matter what.
Femi might be a terrible husband but he was a terrific father to his kids. He showered them with all the love, care and attention a child could ever need and they loved him so much. She didn't want to take that away from them.
They were fast asleep now so She kissed them each on the forehead for the second time and stood to leave. She went to his study were he was still busy working on his laptop.
"Hi babe, it's already late, won't you come to bed?"
She didn't know why she still cared about him after everything he did.
"I'm done" He said as he stood and closed the laptop abruptly.
"it's okay if you still have work to do, No pressure whatsoever. I'll be waiting for you in the bedroom" As she turned to leave, he swiftly rushed to her side and pulled her back.
"Babe I know you said you have forgiven me about what I did the last time, I just wanted you to know that I'm deeply sorry, I love you and I'll try my best to make it up to you. I'll turn a new leaf, please"
"shhh!' she placed her hands on his lips. "I've forgiven you, I don't want you to keep talking about it, just show me, prove to me you've changed by showing me with your actions not your words"
"How about I start showing you by this action, he said as he placed his hand on the small of her back and pulled her close to him. Kissing her slowly and teasingly, she wanted to push him away, to tell him she wasn't ready, that she needed some time but his lips were already trailing her neck, looking for that familiar spot, he found it and she let out a moan. He took the hint at once, tore her silk night gown as bent her over at the table and shifted her panties to the side entering her from behind with a deep and sharp thrust that she screamed out loud.
He pulled her braids as he thrusts into her, going at the perfect pace and the perfect time, sending her soul to the high heavens. This was one thing she loved about this man, he knows exactly what she wants, when she wants and how she wants it.
"Babe, I think I'm cuming now" He said with his sexy husky voice he only uses in the bedroom.
"Don't you dare" She replied as she screamed and rolled her eyes. how he loved to tease her. She knew he would always wait for her first. When she climaxed and he he collapsed against her, he held her close and kissed her on the forehead.
"I love you so much babe" She looked at him not knowing if she should say it back.
"You don't have to say it back. I know I have given you reasons to doubt me" He said, his voice was so endearing that she almost believed him.
"I love you" She said. as she kissed him because the truth was that even though she wasn't sure about his love for her, she was sure of hers.