"GALICK GUN!!" Vegeta bellowed with fury as he unleashed his most powerful attack at point-blank range. The blinding purple energy blasted from his hand, engulfing his hated enemy in a searing inferno of destruction.
Vegeta escaped the blast zone with a nimble backflip, landing with a muted thud tens of meters away. The move clearly left him exhausted; he stood hunched over, looking as though he might collapse at any second. His armor was in ruins, and the multitude of injuries made his entire body feel like a single, massive bruise.
Vegeta took a moment to steady himself, his breaths coming in ragged and uneven gasps. He staggered slightly, but his pride and determination kept him on his feet.
Despite the severe toll the battle had taken on him, he knew with grim certainty that it wasn't over—not by a long shot. There was simply no way it could be.
He glanced over at Nappa, who was sprawled in a most undignified manner. The once-proud Saiyan General had his face smooshed into the dirt while his rear end was awkwardly raised in a highly embarrassing position. The pitiful scene was only made worse by Nappa's pained whines as he clutched his schlong.
Recoome had come very, very close to accomplishing his goal, and the attempt had left Nappa incapacitated for the foreseeable future.
Nappa groaned out with agony, his voice muffled and distorted by the dirt beneath him. "I think I'm down to just one, Vegeta..."
Vegeta shuddered in horror at the words, a cold chill racing down his spine.
"I guess I'm only half the man I used to be…heh…heh…" Nappa weakly chuckled at his own grim joke but immediately regretted it, as the laugh only aggravated his suffering. "Uuuuuuggh… Someone other than Recoome, finish me off..."
Vegeta didn't bother responding to the joke. After decades together, he knew Nappa had a habit of cracking jokes when delirious from intense pain. While Vegeta didn't consider humor to be appropriate for such moments, he refrained from voicing his opinion. Nappa had the right to cope in any way he chose.
But Vegeta couldn't afford to waste more time on Nappa. He turned his focus back to the battle, and as he'd anticipated, despite his best efforts, the reality of the situation had fallen short of the outcome he had hoped for.
Recoome emerged from the thinning dust cloud with comical grace, adopting a theatrical ballerina pose. The man stood on one leg while the other foot rested on the side of his knee to form a precarious triangle. His arms were raised with exaggerated elegance, held high in a "V" that only served to mock Vegeta's efforts.
Despite taking the full force of a Galick Gun point blank, Recoome hadn't sustained the level of injury Vegeta had hoped. Even more disheartening, Vegeta could see the slow but unmistakable signs of Recoome's body beginning to heal—subtle, like the barely perceptible movement of an hour hand on a clock.
Recoome grinned, revealing a gap where one of his teeth had been knocked out by Vegeta earlier. Despite his injuries, there was a disturbingly cheerful expression on his face.
"I love how feisty you are!"
Vegeta felt a wave of revulsion and gagged.
Recoome, catching Vegeta's reaction, flashed a flirtatious wink and, with an over-the-top flourish, blew a kiss in his direction.
"Not now, honey~. Don't get too excited just yet. I'll give you a real reason for that soon enough!"
Disgusted, Vegeta responded by closing the gap between them in an instant, delivering a powerful punch to the side of Recoome's mouth. The impact twisted Recoome's head to the side.
Without giving his opponent a chance to recover, Vegeta launched a flurry of wild, powerful strikes. His fists blurred with speed, each strike fueled by the desire to inflict maximum damage.
A punch connected with Recoome's cheek, but Recoome only smiled. Vegeta followed up with a knee driven hard into Recoome's throat, but still, Recoome smiled. Then came a double axe handle to the top of Recoome's skull, but once again, that grin persisted.
Recoome lazily reached out to grab Vegeta.
To Vegeta, who was still locked in the finishing position of his double axe handle, Recoome's movement was shockingly fast.
Recoome's massive hand clamped around both of Vegeta's wrists with an iron grip, his fingers holding them together like a vice. He held the Saiyan prince before him effortlessly, as if Vegeta were no more than a hissing kitten. He gave Vegeta a playful wink.
"Oh, what a shame!" he said with exaggerated sadness. "We have so little time before I have to tear it off!"
Vegeta's scowl deepened.
Why was it always about his dick? Ever since he arrived on Earth, he couldn't get through a single fight without his manhood being targeted, discussed, or referenced in some fashion.
With a sudden burst of energy, Vegeta's leg snapped up in a powerful kick, but, as had become all too familiar, it had no visible impact on Recoome.
Recoome's laughter rang out.
"Now, now. Let's settle down. There's nothing to be afraid of!"
With that, Recoome twisted his body, leaning back before lifting Vegeta high into the air. Then, demonstrating immense physical strength, Recoome slammed Vegeta down into the ground like the Hulk had once done to Loki. The impact fractured the ground into a network of cracks, sending debris scattering outward from the point of collision.
Recoome showed no sign of slowing down. He spun around, lifted Vegeta again, and slammed him into the ground once more. Each successive impact shattered the ground anew, and Recoome executed the same brutal move with delight. By the twenty-second slam, Vegeta's body had gone limp.
Recoome held Vegeta up again, the Saiyan Prince dangling in his grip like a limp noodle. Vegeta's head hung low, blood trickling steadily onto the ground below. However, even with his devastated physical state, Vegeta summoned just enough strength to lift his head and fix Recoome with a glare of intense, scathing hatred.
Recoome, however, seemed only more entertained by Vegeta's suffering, his delighted smile growing wider.
"Oh, you're so adorable, Vegeta," he said with an affectionate tone. "But all good things must come to an end. Lord Frieza is on a tight schedule, so we can't play for too long~"
With a dramatic flourish, Recoome extended one of his massive fingers and lightly brushed Vegeta's stomach. The touch was deceptively gentle, but its true intent quickly became disturbingly clear. Recoome's grin shone with anticipation as his finger began to slide down slowly...
"VOLCANIC EXPLOSION!"
Recoome's head snapped towards the source of the shout, his expression shifting to one of alarm.
In the next instant, a searing blast of red energy erupted from the ground, spreading outwards in a massive, all-encompassing blast. The attack engulfed both Recoome and Vegeta in a furious wave of energy. The force of the blast sent debris spiraling into the air, shrouding everything in a haze of destruction.
Nappa charged into the explosion, cutting through the flames in a desperate attempt to rescue Vegeta. Nappa soon emerged on the other side, clutching Vegeta in his arms. The two Saiyans tumbled to the ground, collapsing in a heap not far from the blast's epicenter.
Nappa dropped to one knee, still clutching his injured Shenron with an agonized whimper, while Vegeta lay sprawled on his back, his body heaving as he gasped for breath. His hair was singed and slightly scorched from the explosion's intense heat.
"You idiot," Vegeta growled, turning his head limply at an awkward angle to glower at Nappa. "You really couldn't have used anything other than that?! You could've killed me too!"
Still wracked with agony, Nappa could only offer a weak, shaky thumbs-up in response.
"Some things are worse than death..." he rasped.
Well, okay, fine.
As much as Vegeta wanted to argue, he had to concede that Nappa was right and that some experiences were indeed worse than death. His scowl softened a bit, recognizing that he had nearly endured one of those experiences himself.
But there was no rest for the wicked.
From the heart of the explosion, Recoome emerged, strutting out with an air of unshakable confidence. Despite the devastation that had just ravaged the area, he was as unharmed and composed as ever. His swaggering walk was both menacing and despair-inducing.
"Boys~!" Recoome called out, his voice oozing with playfulness. "Hand them over~!"
Recoome's apparent invulnerability distressed Nappa, who let out a low whimper, like air escaping from a sad, deflating balloon. Vegeta, on the other hand, seemed to inexplicably undergo a shift in mood. His earlier irritation and frustration melted away, replaced by a calm, almost serene expression. A self-deprecating smile curled at the corners of his lips, as if he had resignedly accepted the reality.
Recoome prepared to advance, shifting into a stance that indicated he was ready to charge at Nappa and Vegeta. However, his movement came to a premature stop as his eyes widened in surprise. He stared at the new arrival, who had just landed next to Vegeta.
"Oh, hey! It's you guys!" The voice was lively and unmistakably familiar, cutting through the heavy atmosphere with cheerfulness.
Vegeta tilted his head slightly on the ground to take in the new arrival. As expected, it was Kakarot, albeit in a singed and somewhat tattered version of his hideous orange gi. But Vegeta couldn't fathom why the fool was pretending to be surprised; earlier, he had already sensed Kakarot's presence observing from a distance. Kakarot knew exactly who he was rescuing.
Now, normally, Vegeta would rather die than accept something as humiliating as being saved by someone he had sworn to surpass. But, as Nappa had pointed out, some experiences were indeed worse than death.
And so, putting aside his personal grievances at being assisted by someone like Kakarot, Vegeta had to admit that he felt a sense of relief at having some form of backup, even if it came from a source he would never openly admit to valuing.
Besides, with Kakarot's bullshit multiplier technique, he should be able to hold his own against Recoome long enough for him to recover and rejoin the fight.
"Yo!" Goku greeted everyone with his usual cheerful demeanor, offering a small finger salute. His gaze quickly settled on Nappa, who was still groaning in pain and barely responsive. Goku crouched beside Nappa in concern and gently poked the Saiyan General's cheeks in an attempt to assess his condition.
Turning to Vegeta with genuine worry, Goku asked, "Is he alright?"
"He said one of his balls popped," Vegeta replied in a flat, almost detached tone.
Goku winced at the mental imagery.
Straightening up, Goku refocused on Recoome, unintentionally addressing the towering warrior with an authoritative tone. "Sir! You can't just violate the Universal Fighting Bro Code like that!"
Recoome snickered with amusement, shrugging nonchalantly as if the matter was of little consequence.
"The UFBC doesn't apply to lovers! Lord Frieza also wanted their balls, so I have no choice but to tear them off!" Recoome placed a hand dramatically against his forehead, pretending to swoon in distress. "It's not like I want to ruin my darlings!"
"That doesn't sound quite right," Goku said, pursing his lips and tilting his head as he tried to make sense of Recoome's explanation. He placed his hands on his hips, clearly confused. "Are you sure Frieza didn't mean the Dragon Balls? See, that would make more sense."
Recoome struck a heroic pose resembling an exaggerated dab. His entire form exuded an absurd level of confidence.
"Absolutely sure! Why would I want some Dragon's Balls? What would Lord Frieza even do with them? But now that you're here, I shall take yours too!"
Goku paused, but he didn't seem to be too fazed by the bizarre threat.
"Uh, no thanks!" he said with a lighthearted tone, waving a hand in front of him in the universal sign of refusal. "I'd like to keep it! Chi-Chi says that's her favorite part of me."
"Lord Frieza has no interest in the opinions of the weak!" Recoome shouted in a booming voice.
With dramatic flair, he flexed his muscles, striking a classic bodybuilder pose that showcased his physique. He then transitioned into a series of increasingly bizarre and flamboyant poses to gear himself up for battle.
"I'm going to hit you with my ultimate finishing move: the RKO! And the 'R' stands for RECOOOOOME!"
"What the fuck else could it possibly stand for?" Nappa mumbled from the dirt as he continued to clutch his injured ding-dong.
Unfazed by the unencouraging commentary, Recoome began to hype himself up with intense enthusiasm. He started pounding his chest, his voice growing louder to build the suspense as he prepared to unveil his grand move.
"The 'K' stands for—!"
However, Recoome's dramatic proclamation was abruptly cut short. His voice trailed into a breathless gasp as all the air was forcefully expelled from his lungs.
Because Goku had moved.
With blinding speed, Goku closed the gap between them and buried a powerful fist into Recoome's gut.
The impact of Goku's staggering blow sent Recoome reeling backward, his entire body jolting from the force. His eyes bulged in shock and pain as he clutched his stomach, struggling to catch his breath.
"T—That's as h—hard as my Recoome Gut Punch…" he wheezed.
Goku tilted his head, genuinely surprised that his punch hadn't brought Recoome down. He watched as Recoome straightened up, still wheezing but already starting to recover. Recoome's resilience made Goku pause and reconsider his approach.
Typically, Goku wasn't the one to initiate conflict, as he made sure to always offer peace whenever possible, unless his opponent refused it or was beyond saving. This principle, taught to him by his grandpa, had guided him through many battles throughout his life.
But today had been an exception.
He had been unexpectedly shot down from space, leading to the destruction of nearly everything Dr. Briefs had painstakingly prepared for him. Additionally, Recoome's insult toward Chi-Chi also fueled his anger. As a result, Goku found himself feeling unusually hot-headed.
To his own embarrassment.
"Let's call it quits, okay?" Goku suggested sincerely. "From that attack alone, you should already know you're no match for me."
The proposal was offered with respect, representing Goku's intention to de-escalate the confrontation.
Recoome, however, responded with a hearty laugh, his bravado unshaken. "You've just taken me by surprise! I've taken worse hits than that before!"
Under his confident exterior, however, Recoome's demeanor had shifted. His flamboyant showmanship gave way to a more serious and focused intent. Without any further theatrics, Recoome charged at Goku, roaring.
"RECOOME LIGHTS OUT!"
Goku efficiently dodged the powerful haymaker with a backward lean, the attack almost brushing against his nose.
Without missing a beat, Recoome immediately followed up with his next attack.
"RECOOME ANKLE BREAKER!"
Goku nimbly hopped over Recoome's low sweeping kick. As Goku descended, Recoome's voice rang out dramatically, "RECOOME-!"
Before Recoome could finish his attack, Goku's fist snapped out, smashing into Recoome's face with enough force to knock out at least two more teeth, sending them flying through the air. But to Goku's surprise, Recoome didn't flinch or retreat as most would. Instead, he did the unexpected—he leaned into the punch, his face compressing against Goku's fist.
This bold maneuver caught Goku off guard, disrupting his balance as he landed and allowing Recoome to invade his personal space.
Recoome's hands latched onto both sides of Goku's face, and with a triumphant roar, he slammed his forehead into Goku's.
"–HEADBUTT!"
The powerful blow sent a violent jolt through Goku's head, making his brain rattle inside his skull. He winced as his vision briefly blurred, the world seemingly shifting out of focus.
Landing with a dramatic flourish, Recoome capitalized on Goku's momentary disorientation by spinning in a full 360-degree twirl. As he completed the spin, he swung his elbow outward, channeling all his momentum into the strike.
"RECOOME ELBOW STRIKE!"
Despite the disorienting headbutt, Goku's martial arts instincts kicked in. His reflexes were razor-sharp, and as Recoome's elbow came crashing toward him, Goku's hand shot out in a blur, catching the attack mid-air before it could slam into his jaw.
"RECOOME NUTCRACKER!"
Goku's other hand swiftly blocked the rising knee, stopping it just short of Chi-Chi's favorite spot.
Recoome found himself in an awkward position. With a burst of incredible speed, he disentangled himself and spun through the air, knee extended outward. The spinning knee strike was delivered with explosive force, aimed squarely at Goku's head.
"RECOOME KNEE STRIKE!"
But Goku was suddenly no longer there.
In the infinitesimal moment before the kick completed its arc, Recoome stared in utter bewilderment at the empty space where his opponent had just been. Then, his eyes instinctively flicked upward, catching a vivid crimson glow searing into his retinas.
Recoome saw a knee.
Shrouded in the blazing aura of the Kaioken, Goku had repositioned himself directly above Recoome. With flawless precision, Goku's Kaioken-enhanced knee slammed into Recoome's face.
Crunch.
Recoome was sent flying backward with such force that he tumbled head over heels in a chaotic spin. As Recoome hurtled through the air, ass over teakettle, he carved a trench through the debris-strewn ground, skidding off into the distance.