I sit alone in a tiny apartment. Celebrating my 17th birthday. I have no friends, and even if I did, they would be long gone by now. My parents are dead. The people who were supposed to take care of me abandoned me when I was young. No one is looking out for me anymore. I'm  supposed to be happy. I'm supposed to be enjoying my youth like a regular girl who has friends and a family that cares about me. But all I feel is empty. So very empty.

Empty, until the doorbell rings. And then it doesn't matter how much I want to hide. It won't bring back my parents or stop the pain.

It's not a friend visiting. Not someone who wants to play a game or watch TV with me. What happens next will change my life forever.

***

A knock on the front door always makes me nervous. A stranger could be there for any reason—to ask directions, borrow something, or steal from me.

The only thing I'm certain about is that this person isn't here to visit me. I don't know what he looks like, but I can hear him breathing heavy at the other side of the door. When I open the door, I see a tall boy with his hair shaved on the sides and long on the top with a single yellow streak in the middle. He stares at me as he smokes his cigarette.

"Can I help you?" I ask.

He takes another puff of his cigarette before responding. "Ah. Wrong door."

My heart skips a beat. "Wrong door? You're...you're not here to kill me, are you?" I say, stepping backward into the apartment.

He laughs. "No need to get so defensive."

I stare at him, trying to figure out what he means. If he's here to hurt me, why would he laugh? "What do you want?"

His eyes sweep over my body, and his gaze lingers on my chest and stomach. He walks off. I listen to him walk down the hall and around the corner.

"Wait," I call after him.

When I step outside, he's still smoking. He looks up at me with a smile on his face. "You live here alone?" he asks.

"No." I lied.

"You sure about that?" he says. "'Cause it sounds like you're lying. You scared?"

I hesitated to say anything back. A bit of fear crept over as I tried to get the words to leave my mouth. The man laughed softly again. "Calm down. I really did just knock on the wrong door." He finishes his cigarette, flicks it onto the ground, and puts another in his mouth. He pats the seat next to him on the wall for me to join him.

"You shouldn't chain-smoke." I blurted out.

His eyebrows go up. "Why not?"

"Because smoking causes cancer. It can also lead to lung disease—like emphysema or asthma."

He grins. "You're a little smarty-pants aren't ya?" he laughs, pushing himself off the wall. He looked at me up and down once more before asking, "You still in school? You look a little young to be living alone." I nodded, swallowing hard. He held out his hand toward me. I shook it without hesitation. "I'm Seiji," he said.

"Himiko," I told him.

Seiji stared at me for a moment too long. I don't know why, but something about the way he looked at me gave me chills. It wasn't a leering stare that made my heart race with fear, like when men try to get you in their cars after dark. It was different.

His eyes didn't make me feel dirty or disgusted—they were curious, interested even. They seemed to be trying to read every inch of me. His gaze felt sharp. Like an arrow through the wind. It went right into my soul and pierced straight to the center where my secrets are hidden.

He dropped my hand. "Well, Himiko, it was nice to meet ya." He started to walk away. I chased after him.

"Wait," I said.

Seiji turned around. I fell to my knees and bowed my head. He knelt beside me. "Why are you bowing? Is something wrong?"

I lifted my head from the ground. "Please...take me away from here."

He loomed over me, cocking his head. "You want me to take you away from here?" he asks as if what I just asked him is the most absurd thing he's heard in a long time. Seiji reaches for his pack of cigarettes and pulled out another one.

I looked at him. My voice shook with fear as I tried to get the words out. "My parents aren't here anymore, and no one is taking care of me. No one cares about me," I stammered. The more I talked, the closer I felt myself being drawn into him. It was almost as if his body was pulling mine toward it. I didn't even know why.

Seiji flicked open his lighter. A flame appeared and caught hold to his cigarette. He wasn't saying anything, he just stood there. Watching me talk. Smoke drifted from his lips when he exhaled. 

"Take me with you...Please."

A smile came over him. His eyes squinted as the wind blew through his hair. "So you want me to kidnap ya?" He chuckled softly. I didn't say anything back.

I hung my head low. He laughed louder this time before dropping to his knees and wrapping an arm around my shoulder. The heat of his skin pressed up against mine—it made me feel warm in a way that only Mom used to do.

Seiji stared into my face for what seemed like forever. Our bodies were so close together—I could smell him—like incense mixed with something else that was new and exotic. I felt safe all of a sudden. Safe and protected. It felt good to have someone looking after me again.

His hand cupped my chin, lifting my head upward so that our eyes locked on one another once more. Seiji brushed his thumb across my cheek and said, "Okay."

Seiji took me by the hand and led me down the stairs from my apartment into a parked car outside. No one paid any attention to us, or if they did, I didn't see it. It was like we were in our own little world away from reality.

I climbed into the passenger side of his car. He followed right behind me before closing the door. "Where are we going?" I asked as he pulled out of the parking spot and onto the road.

"Well, first we're gonna find some food," he said. The sun was setting as Seiji drove through the city. My heart raced faster than it had ever done before. Reality began to set in: What would I do if this all turned bad? Would I be able to protect myself? Could I escape from someone like Seiji if need be?

A wave of fear washed over me as soon as those thoughts came to my head. All of the books I read said that you never let your guard down, not even around people who love you—or at least claimed they loved you. Love is a lie...I learned that when Mom left me alone with Dad.

But, despite everything, I felt safe for the first time in forever. It didn't matter what happened next—there was no way I could go back. If this doesn't work out, I'm fine with dying. At least I will know I tried.

We stopped outside a small building with rice paper walls. "What's that?" I asked.

Seiji smiled and motioned for me to follow him inside. The smell of food filled the room—like soy sauce and freshly grilled chicken mixed together. My mouth watered from the scent, but I still couldn't shake the worry in my head. There were so many things that could go wrong if I went inside.

We sat at the counter in front of the cook. Seiji ordered for both of us and slid a bowl across the table. It was steaming hot—almost too much for me to handle, but it smelled amazing. I hadn't had real food in a long time. All the money I made working part-time ended up going right back into paying for rent or buying packaged ramen. 

I dipped my chopsticks into the soup and brought them close to my mouth. I hesitated as I stared at him through narrowed eyes. Seiji grinned as he saw me staring before dipping his own chopsticks into the broth.

It tasted better than anything I had ever eaten before. My body was so hungry that even though it felt like I was going to explode, I just kept on eating—chop after chop—and never stopping. Before I knew it, we were both done with our bowls of noodles. I sat back in my chair feeling content for a moment before another wave of worry washed over me.

Seiji paid the bill before leading us out onto the streets again. It was dark by now and even colder since the sun had set. We walked back to his car and drove off somewhere far away from everything I knew or cared about. I looked around at the unfamiliar city lights as they illuminated every corner of the roads and sidewalks.

I don't know where he took me, but eventually we stopped outside an empty warehouse with cracked windows and peeling paint on the siding. "Where are we?" I asked him as we got out of the car together. He didn't say anything back; instead he turned to face me. He reached out and brushed a strand of hair behind my ear before cupping my cheek in one hand. My heart began racing again.

"Don't worry," he said, "I know it looks scary. You'll be fine." He opened the door and led me inside. We came across a group of young men that all wore leather jackets with what looked like a phoenix on the back—a red circle with three stars surrounding the Japanese kanji for phoenix. They were playing cards around a table near a TV. A bunch of other guys lounged in chairs next to them while smoking cigarettes. No one looked up when we entered.

Seiji got their attention, however, as soon as we stepped into the room. "Oi!" He called out. Everyone looked up at him and immediately stood up from their seats. "What are you doing here, Boss?" one asked. Boss? Is this guy in charge of a gang or something? I wondered to myself.

Seiji smiled when he heard them talking to him. It was obvious they knew him very well. As if reading my mind, Seiji turned back toward me and placed his hand on my shoulder. "You see, Himiko, these guys work for me." My eyes went wide as I stared at all the faces that surrounded us. A few of the men smirked while others just kept their gaze locked onto mine.

"Is...is that so?" I said with a gulp. He nodded back at me before looking away and speaking to them once more. "We should all be welcoming our new member, right boys?" They cheered loudly in response—some even gave me a hug like we had been friends for years! After all that, everyone went back to what they were doing except for Seiji.

"Let's go," he told me. He pulled my arm as he started walking toward the door at the far end of the warehouse. We opened it and walked inside. The room was bigger than I expected with a table full of cards and five men sitting on chairs. Seiji shut the door behind us.

The men all stood up when they saw him enter the room. One of them smiled and called out, "Yo, boss!" It was then that I realized this wasn't some small-time gang, but rather something much larger in scale. And even worse...I had just stepped foot into the lion's den.

"Seems like you have another stray cat for us to look after," one man said, glaring at me. I shivered from his words. What did he mean? Another stray cat? Was he talking about me? My stomach began tying itself in knots as more and more questions formed inside my head. Why was I here? What was going to happen to me now? 

It seemed as if no one else cared what happened to me or who was responsible for me. In their eyes, I must be nothing but a toy to play with and throw away once they got bored. I felt alone again. This time it was worse than ever—like someone had just reached down and ripped my heart out of my chest. "Now, now boys, don't scare the new girl too badly." Seiji told them. He motioned for them to introduce themselves.

The first guy started off. "I'm Keiichi. Nice to meet ya." His voice was smooth like butter on hot bread. He flashed a smile at me as he waved. "Setsuna," said the third man who didn't seem particularly interested in anything around him. I wonder what makes each of these men so dangerous. "Rin." the next said. Rin reminded me of a wolf—eyes sharp and piercing right into my soul. 

The fourth guy spoke up. "Kioshi." Kioshi reminded me of someone you wouldn't want to mess with. His eyes were hard, dark like black coal. Not even the most gorgeous sunset or the brightest star would be able to pierce that darkness inside of him. The fifth and final guy was taller than all the rest—over six feet tall—and had a visible tattoo on the side of his neck. "Eito." he said in a deep raspy tone that sent chills down my spine.

Seiji then motioned for me to introduce myself. "I'm Himiko," I replied nervously. They looked at each other with cold, hard eyes. I could feel them sizing me up and down. Judging me against everyone else here as if they already knew exactly who they thought I was. Seiji pulled out a chair for me. As soon as I sat down, he took the seat next to mine.

"You have such a cute name, Himiko." Keiichi says while grabbing his cards off the table and shuffling them together. He looks up and flashes a smile before starting to deal the deck. "Welcome to Rising Phoenix!" he laughed loudly while taking his seat. I look around the room once more. 

"I expect you to treat Himiko like family, okay?" Seiji tells them. His face is stern as he speaks those words to everyone gathered here today. Eito raises an eyebrow at this news but nods regardless. I stand in place unsure of how I should feel about all this. I turned to Seiji nervously wondering what kind of trouble I had just got myself into.

Seiji gave me a wink and left the room, leaving me with the five men inside it. Silence filled the air around us as no one dared say anything at first. Keiichi was the first one to speak up—something which I had expected. "So where'd you come from, little Himiko? You didn't have any friends or family?" he asked with a soft voice that made me relax slightly.

"U-Um...," I started off while looking down at my feet. Rin chuckled softly next to me, interrupting me before I could finish my sentence. "It seems like we've already got ourselves a shy one," he said. The others all laughed at this as well—a noise that felt more sinister than funny. I felt the corners of my eyes begin to water with tears.

"Great, she's crying on us now." Setsuna muttered as he rolled his eyes. My bottom lip quivered slightly as the sobs escaped from inside my chest and throat. Keiichi frowned when he noticed me crying and took my hand in his own. It was warm—and gentle for such a dangerous man as him. "Hey, hey...no need to cry anymore. You don't have to be afraid here," he told me with soft smile.

"Tch. Stop coddling her already." Eito says while standing up from his seat. He walks over toward where I am sitting and glares at both Keiichi and me. I looked up at him, trembling with fear as the tears continue to fall down my cheeks. I try wiping them away but they keep coming. Rin laughs again before standing up too. "Look at her, crying like a little baby." he snickered. I kept on crying even harder after hearing these words leave his mouth. The room was spinning faster than I could think of something to say back. All I knew was that everything around me seemed out of control. Like someone had grabbed the steering wheel from inside my head and made it hard to see straight.

Eito sighed deeply while rolling his eyes at me. He puts two fingers under my chin and lifts my face upward so that our gazes lock together once more. "Just calm down for now. There's no reason to cry, okay?" he says sternly—so much so that I begin believing him. Eito brushes a strand of hair behind my ear as I stare into his eyes. His eyes are black like coal—like tiny little dark pits right inside his head—but still they have a way of calming me down after just one glance.

"Go sit down." he told me firmly before taking the chair next to mine. I wiped away the tears on my cheek and took a deep breath. It was only then that I realized everyone else had stopped talking or laughing—all of their attention now on me. 

"She's so quiet," Rin muttered while walking around behind me. He reached up and began messing with my hair. "Her hair is so soft. And silky too," he continued as his fingers combed through it carefully. My heart skipped a beat when I felt his skin brush up against the back of my neck. "Stop teasing her. She clearly doesn't wanna be bothered by us right now." Setsuna said gruffly while smacking Rin's arm away from my head.

I sat in place, looking down at my hands and wondering how things were going to turn out for me. It was such an odd feeling knowing that everyone here seemed to be good friends with Seiji. Why did he bring me into this situation? I wondered what kind of trouble I had just stepped into. But still, it's better than being alone. At least for now...

"What was the boss thinking bringing a woman here? Tch. Seriously," Kioshi grumbled under his breath. He crossed his arms over his chest and leaned back against his chair, making himself look more intimidating. Setsuna rolled his eyes at Kioshi's words while pouring another cup of tea from his pot. "Oh please. She won't last long here." Setsuna stated bluntly before taking a sip from his drink.

The rest of the group all agreed with him on that—all except Eito, who sat quietly next to me without saying a word. I sighed heavily as I continued staring off into space. How could things be so complicated around here? So many thoughts went through my head until it finally started to get late. "Get up. We're leaving now." Eito said calmly as he stood from his chair. It took me a minute or two to realize what had just happened.

Eito grabbed onto my wrist and pulled me out of the room with the rest of them. I didn't resist when he touched me. Instead I followed closely behind him in silence. My heart was beating fast as we made our way out of the warehouse. "Wait...where are you taking me?" I asked nervously as he kept on pulling me along. None of them responded to me; instead they kept on moving forward. 

Eito let my wrist fall from his grasp and pushed me into the backseat of a car that had been waiting for us outside the building. Everyone else climbed inside and then we took off driving away.  For some reason I started feeling dizzy and sick— it could have just been my nerves getting to me again. My vision became blurry while everything around me felt distant and surreal. 

I fell asleep without realizing it.