My head starts spinning, I think I am going to pass out and vomit all in one.
Ella puts her hand over my back and helped me up
I watched Killian smile like a doting fiance as Nicole smiles at him like he won the lottery.
I looked towards Killian, there was a time in highschool when all he talked about were the plans of having children but the smile on his face that didn't reach his eyes, that smile wasn't real .
It was a congratulating smile a person gives when you get a promotion or win something. A fake smile of support when things are out of your control.
Killian would look a hundred times more excited if Nicole announces that she's going to get shot in the head or that she's moving halfway across the planet.Nicole seems thrilled but Killian doesn't
We watch as the Lores family members hugged Nicole and shook Killian's hands but Jack seemed shocked as he clapped while giving me a pitiful smile.
Killian looked to Jack as if Jack has all the answers but Nicole held on his arm tight like a pole. He looked back at me for a millisecond while Jack frowns disappointedly
I tried so hard to hide the tears but I knew
Killian and I can never be together. Not now.
Not now that I know Nicole is having his child and Killian will still want to play pretend like she never did anything to hurt me.
Ella rubs my back softly but as tears brim my eyes, Ella decided to grab yet again another drink and stare angrily towards the scene. I feel Ella tense up so I watch the scene as well
Jack leaves Nicole side after a quick hug and Killian takes Nicole in his arms and they start dancing slowly on the beach to the faint music but when Killian looks back at me again.
Son of a bitch
I started wiping my tears with the towel I was given.
I pick up my handbag on the bar island
I'm going back to New York, fuck it all , fuck being a CEO, fuck being disrespectful, Fuck Killian Lores. I'm not a joke
I knew what this was coming, What was I thinking. He wants to marry Nicole and have kids. This baby has fulfilled Killian's family wishes faster than I'll ever manage to do that.
My head throbbed from too many drinks and the emotional pain. I rubbed my forehead slowly but it just won't calm down
Ella stared angrily as Killian kisses Nicole forehead and all I wanted to do was leave. Ella's eyes swelled but she dabbed it all with a towel as Jack started walking towards us . Jack had an apologetic look
"Marissa you don't even have to be here"
"Sure, I'm Leaving anyways" I muttered bitterly,
I was upset and I can't control the amount of angry words that might fly out of my mouth and hurt Killian.
Jack shrugged "I could call you a cab to the airport" he suggests. Ella huffed angrily
"Yeah, you are an expert with Planned exits" she said bitterly
Jack frowned "what does that supposed to mean" he raises his brow in questioning. Ella looked like she could start World War III at the scene.
She laughs sarcastically, "Nothing" she slurs taking a chug of the Long Island drink,
Jack huffed angrily at Ella,
"Look Marissa" he touches my hand "I can also ask my driver to take you back to the hotel so you can take the Company Plane Back to New York"
"Jack" Ella cuts him off "Just Fuck OFF!"Ella swears under her drink while Jack's eyes flared.
It's no doubt she's drunk, she's had every mix and spirit at the bar. I looked worried towards Ella but Jacks face remained upset.
"Gladly" Jack says towards Ella and he leans and whispers to Ella but Ella swears angrily. I tapped his shoulder softly and said " I'll take the Cab thanks" and I start walking off the beach, Ella follows but Jack grabs her hand.
"El" he whispered and Ella snaps
" No Jack, I'm tired of being your 12 o'clock secret" Jack let go off her hand like she stung
I leave them to their little bickering, I'm too dizzy to process any of this shit.
All I could remember is seeing Killian stare at me while dancing with Nicole at a further point by the shore.
I stop staring when the tears blurred my vision. I speed walk across the beach, dizzy as fuck
I don't care about stupid luggage, I just want out.
I flung my hotel door open and grabbed my passport and credentials immediately.
The tears stained my eyes and my hands trembled
I paid for my flight, got on economy and flew back to NY. I finally got settled into my apartment bed then unlocked my phone, I've got a thousand messages, calls and voicemails mostly Killian but I just called Ella to fill me in.
"I flew to NY as well, Nicole and Killian looked happy, Jack asked me to meet with him privately again and one more thing, You left me alone Marissa!, WTF!"
"Jack thought I wouldn't stop by, he was with some other chick, they were making out Ella said with disgust but I laughed.
"You don't sound so disgusted, "El" I say teasing and I heard Ella groan
" Marissa please!, I'm supposed to hate Jack"
I chuckled at Ella whining
" But do you" I taunt.
"Yes!, well I don't know. I was so mad Marissa, I am, I am so angry right now Marissa. what do I do Marissa?" Ella groans
I tell her she should think about things, after all she's had too many drinks
"El go get rest" I yawn " I'll talk to you when I wake up, love you " and I hung up the phone before Ella responded
My last thoughts as I try to get some sleep are about Killian. It stings and I feel sick. Killian Lores made me so vulnerable yet so safe around him and he just hurts me.
Bitch shut the fuck up! —i scolded my self
Part of me kept wishing that Killian would stop me from getting on that plane, the way it always happens in stupid Romance dramas or Lifetime movies.
I know i like that shit, After all, Killian, of all people, could travel as the wind— literally!— to any spot on earth, but he's with Nicole and I have to get over it.
He isn't mine— he'd never been "mine".
There's a knock on my door and I stir, blinking against my sleep. When I glance at my clock I see I've been been trying to go to bed for almost an hour.
My apartment is cloaked in shadows as the moonlight bathes my window. Another knock and I sit up, swinging my feet over the side of my bed.
"Marissa?" The feminine whisper is instantly familiar and I hurry to answer. My best friend Rachel stands on the other side. She looks sleepy as her dark eyes hold my gaze. Her blond curls fall damp and wild around her shoulders.
"Rachel it's 3am!, Where's your car did you walk three blocks?" She struts down the hall and I sigh, closing the door, I know by now Rachel does as she pleases.
"Don't yell it's so late." she shushes.
"It's early, and you know the rule no visits after midnight because you never text and tell me, it's dangerous being out so early!"
"Ella told me Killian's getting married Marissa!" She says my name louder than her previous statement and my chest tightens as it always does when someone says his name. I want to cover her mouth but she's practically jogging from foot to foot, pacing my living room.
"To Nicole" she completes as if I wasn't completely aware already. I hate that his fiance's name leaves her lips so easily, as if I don't spend all of my nights picturing her and Killian in each others arms.
"Ella told you?" I ask needing a few minutes to wake myself up because it's late. And I feel slow, always do when the memories try to take over and drag me back.
"Yes, so I need a margarita stat because I'm pissed you didn't tell me, and " she looks at me apologetic
"I'm sorry boo, Killian's an idiot"
I fight off my grimace because Rachel really means well, she just doesn't like Killian. Or the past for that matter which is understandable I've shared some of the hard parts. Not the entirety of my high school disaster romance because in the end we really were just kids. Who knew nothing of life, love and we lost our innocence long before we planned too.
Rachel orders us Chinese and before long I'm standing in my kitchen chopping onions because she demands tortillas with our drinks. She hands me half of our tequila- no triple sec and then tops mine off with three splashes more. Rachel hates tequila and I drink because Killian isn't mine.
Nicole gets that privilege now.
"Forget about him" Rachel urges "Ella said Killian looks awful without you, apparently Nicole doesn't care that she's ruining his life by marrying him" she sucks in a breath looking concerned "or hurting you, for what it's worth, you can finally move past all that highschool drama, there are more men in the world, each better than Killian Lores"
She clinks her glass to mine and I fight my scowl at his full name. No more Killian sounds too proper but she's not wrong, there is life after highschool love and Killian will never matter to me again.