Bianca
I don't sleep well in new places, especially not in places where I don't know if I can trust those around me.
I know I can trust Edmund. He's a vampire, and vampires are the shifters' sworn enemies. Only, I'm not a shifter. I'm something else. Something I don't even know. A human, I guess. Just a regular old human. That makes me nobody in their world. Yet, Edmund has chosen to protect me.
I don't delude myself into thinking that it has anything to do with me personally. He would have probably done it if it was anyone else. He just needs me to help him find the well. As for the fact that we spent two nights together…
I sigh to myself as I turn in the sleeping bag, in the tent. They let me sleep in one tent all by myself, which I appreciate. Still, sleeping in the woods isn't what I imagined it to be. It's not as scary as I thought it would be, with vampires all around. The fact that Edmund was here all night long made me sleep like a baby.
Again, I know I shouldn't think about him so much. I shouldn't allow myself to fall for him, but the thing is, I think I've already fallen for him, and there is no going back from here.
A part of me doesn't want to show my face outside of the tent. I honestly have no idea what I'm doing here. I feel the eyes of other vampires on me, and not in a good way. I know they're wondering the same thing. What am I seriously doing here? I have no idea where the well is. I'm not even a shifter. How the heck am I supposed to do anything for them, in return for keeping me safe?
All I want to do now is hide underneath the blanket and stay here for the rest of the day. I feel lost. I feel like I have no idea where I am or even worse, where I will go from here. What happens when Edmund finds the well? Or if there's no well at all? He'll be gone, with his vampires, and what about me? Do I stay here? That's impossible.
The shifters never forgive and forget. Such a thing doesn't exist in their vocabulary. I will have to go away… but where?
Just imagining how vast this world is, beyond the confines of the town where I grew up, makes me shudder with fear. I know I always wanted to see it, to leave, to find myself, but now seems like the worst possible moment for it. Maybe I want to stay so desperately because I know I can't.
I sigh to myself heavily, and just as I'm about to pull the cover over my head, I hear the zipper of the tent open.
"Are you awake?" Edmund asks me, peering inside.
"Now I am," I say.
"Well, get up," he says. "You need to come with me."
"Where?" I ask, frowning. I had no intention of getting out of the tent, let alone going somewhere specific.
"You'll know in due time," he says mysteriously, then his head disappears, but he doesn't zip the tent back up.
I inhale deeply before I uncover myself and get out. I expect to see everyone there, but to my surprise, we're the only ones here. I look around, my brows furrowing.
"What's wrong?" he asks, facing me.
"The sun is too bright," I tell him, lifting my hand to shield my eyes from the sun.
He laughs. "Should I turn it down?"
"Not funny," I frown. "I just woke up."
"It's noon," he tells me.
"What?" I gasp. "I slept till noon?"
"Yeah," he nods. "I didn't want to wake you. You needed to rest."
"I never sleep so late," I admit. For some reason, I don't want him to think that I'm a lazy bum who sleeps till noon and does nothing to pull her own weight. That's not me. That's never been me.
"That's OK," he says, with a smile. "If you slept that well, that means that you felt safe here. It's a good thing."
He's right. So, I don't say anything to that. Instead, I focus on the fact that we are all alone.
"Where is everyone?" I ask, looking around.
"I sent them out to try and find something," I hear him say, sounding somewhat defeated.
"To the shifter town?"
"Some, yes," he nods. "Others are basically wandering through the woods, hoping to stumble onto something meaningful."
"What are the odds of that?" I wonder, then think to myself that I should have probably kept my mouth shut. He doesn't need me to pour salt on the wound.
"I know," he shrugs. "But we have to keep doing something."
"But… you aren't with them," I point out. "Why?"
"Because I promised I would keep you safe, didn't I?" he reminds me.
"You did," I agree. "But that doesn't mean you need to be by my side 24/7."
The worst thing is that a part of me wouldn't even mind this. Only, I would get used to it. I would become so accustomed to his presence that the lack of it would be unbearable. That is why it's better to keep my distance from him, if such a thing is even possible.
"That is why I have a suggestion," he announces, stepping in front of me.
"What is it?" I immediately ask, mostly because his closeness is affecting me in ways I don't want to admit.
"I want to show you some defense moves which you can use," he explains, "in case I am not around, or you are alone for whatever reason, and someone attacks you. You need to be able to defend yourself."
I think about it for a moment. "That's actually not a bad idea."
"See?" he smirks. "I'm not such a bad guy. I just pretend to be."
"I wouldn't go that far," I tease.
Then, I immediately bite my tongue. It's not safe to tease him. It is not safe for me, for my heart. They won't be here forever. They will be gone. More importantly, he will be gone. He won't take me with him, and I won't ask to be taken. I need to shield my heart from being hurt.
"How far would you go then?" he teases me back, but I decide to cut it right here.
"How about we focus on the task at hand?" I ask instead.
I can see he wasn't expecting me to say that. I even feel a little bad, because we obviously both want to flirt. It's just that I can't. I don't dare to. It's bad enough that I have to be by his side, but I don't have to add flirting to it. I need to set a clear boundary between us, and everything should be fine.
"Well, OK," he starts, clearing his throat a little. "The best way to protect yourself is to run away. We all know that. You need to be aware of your surroundings at all times, especially now that everyone in town is your enemy. They all think you're a traitor. Another option is to try and diffuse the situation by talking, which again, in your situation won't do much. In other words, sometimes running away and talking your way out of a situation just isn't possible." He pauses here, letting it all sink in. Then, he continues. "If you have to fight, you use your elbows and knees. Not your fists. Got it?"
I nod, as he's grabbing me by the elbows, pulling me closer. Then, he wraps his fingers around my hand. It fits perfectly in his.
"Contrary to what you believe or were told, fist fighting is not what you want to do, unless your plan is to break your hand," he explains. "If your attacker gets close enough to you, you use your elbows and knees. You hit them where it hurts, got it?"
I nod again. He points down between his crotch.
"You aim for the guy's junk," he instructs. "That's the easiest one. He'll fall down to his knees if you do it properly, then another knee kick in the jaw and you're able to run away. I doubt he'll be getting up soon after that."
Then, he takes a step back, releasing my hand from his.
"If you're able to stay at a safe distance from your attacker, use your legs to fight him off," he continues explaining. "Your legs are longer than your arms, so that gives you better chances of landing a kick without him being close enough to do anything in return. You'll be able to kick him harder."
Once again, he takes a step close to me and grabs me by the hand. He puts it right on his face, with my palm wide open. I can see his eyes between my fingers. My heart is beating wildly. I don't know why I find this so hot, but I do.
"Again, if you're unable to keep your distance from someone, don't punch him… or her," he corrects himself, probably remembering Gala's group and how she was the ringleader, "with your fist. You might break a bone or something, and you might not even hit that hard. Instead, slap."
"Slap?" I frown.
"Mhm," he nods. "Strike your opponent with your open palm or even better, scratch them."
"I knew that myself," I chuckle.
"What do you need me for then?" he teases again, and I see he's constantly back to that line that I don't want crossed. But every time he nears it, I follow obediently.
"Duh," I playfully rolled my eyes. "To teach me something I don't know."
"Well, how about if someone grabs you like this?" he asks, taking me completely off guard by slamming me against the tree and rendering me completely immobile.
His knee is standing firmly between my legs, his thigh almost rubbing against my aching, throbbing spot but it's like he knows I want him to touch me there, so he doesn't. One hand is around my neck, gently keeping me in place, although making it impossible for me to move. His other hand somehow managed to grab both mine and is now keeping them behind my back. I don't even know how this happened, in a blink of an eye.
We're staring each other down, breathing so closely we can feel the warmth of the other one's breath.
"That wasn't fair," I point out, unwilling to look away for even a single moment.
"Life isn't fair," he corrects me. "If someone attacks you, is that what you're gonna say? That wasn't fair?"
He's taunting me. I can see it in his eyes. He wants to get a rise out of me. He wants me to fight back.
I also want to fight back, but I'm enjoying his closeness too much. To be quite honest, I don't even know if I'm able to push him away. So, we just stand like that, opponents, but somehow finding ourselves on the same side.
"I could do whatever I wanted to you right now," he whispers, licking his lips.
I never wanted to be kissed this badly. The saliva glistens on his lower lip and I want to taste it, just like I tasted it the last time we slept together. But I manage to fight the urge. That's what he wants. He wants me to go crazy over him. He wants me to lose control.
If I stay in control, that will surprise him more than any of my fight back moves ever could. So, I keep staring back at him, drowning out that voice inside of me that is screaming for me to wrap my arms around him, pull him close and ravage him right here without the slightest concern that someone might come back and see us like that.
"You may think that," I tell him. "But we both know that's not true."
"It's not?" he smirks. "How come?"
"We are standing like this only because you took me by surprise," I point out. "I trusted you, so I allowed you to stand so close to me. If you were a suspicious stranger, I'd be kneeing you in the balls right now," I tell him.
Suddenly, he bursts out into a chuckle, and I can't help but join in.
Gosh, those lips are to die for. Will my desire for him ever fade?