I never thought I'd make friends with someone so quickly.
It started with her Ceremony and my thoughts about how fun it'd be to make her demeanor waver. The small things she showed weren't enough for me, and I was curious about what I could do to get more out of her.
Then it was about how I wanted to make her laugh, or even just smile a few more times. Aside from a few small twitches of the corners of her mouth or from her fingers, I couldn't say I really succeeded.
Then I just wanted to talk with her more, find out about who she was and what she wanted. I learned some fragments about her life, some of her favorite books (which were all educational), the foods she liked (which were modest and not something I'd expect a noble to eat), and what she liked to do for fun (reading and chess). Nothing that could be considered deep or really personal.
Eventually I gave up probing into her life too much as there were certain subjects I quickly discovered she would avoid. Anything about her family that wasn't 'they care for me' or 'I get everything I need' was off limits.
She avoided the subject of the Trees too, but that was something I should have been avoiding as well. I'm glad Mari is more attentive to what's appropriate to talk about than I am. I'm also glad mom isn't around to hear me continuously slipping up and having to have someone a year younger than me catch it and correct me.
But before the majority of what happened after we confirmed our friendship, I was scared for her safety a second time.
It was only the second day after she had recovered from her Ceremony when we received news she was bedridden again, and her health was being closely monitored. I dashed out of the sitting room my parents and I were having tea in and rushed towards her bedroom. I'm sure I heard the shouts of my mom behind me, but I didn't care if I got in trouble this time.
When I arrived I saw that she was propped up in her bed, covered in sweat, and paler than when she collapsed during the Ceremony. Her breathing looked shallow, her eyes were squeezed shut as if in pain, and Healer Yumi was by her bedside holding a bottle of some liquid that she used a thin thread to drip into Mari's mouth.
"What happened? Will she get better? Is there anything I can do?"
Healer Yumi looked over at me with a hesitant gaze. My heart was climbing into my throat, and I felt my chest tighten.
"She collapsed early last night with convulsions and muscle contractions; she hasn't regained consciousness since then and her condition is dangerous. I don't think there's anything much you can do, but if you can stay quiet and occasionally get some things for me if the maids are busy, that might help. Otherwise, I'll have to ask you to leave."
"What does dangerous mean?"
She hesitated again, but it looks like she decided on something.
"This doesn't leave this room, and since the maids aren't here right now, I can tell you. She's malnourished to the point that her body is trying to find nutrients anywhere it can, even in her own muscles and organs. If we can't get enough liquids and nutrients in her from outside or her body doesn't accept them, she…"
The implication was obvious, and Healer Yumi's face took on a solemn expression.
I collapsed on the ground, my knees slamming on the hard floors, the pain a welcome distraction but not enough of one. I wanted to hit someone, something, anything to take my anger out on the reason for her being like this. She was just a year younger than me, why does she have to suffer like this?
I wanted to wallow in my own sadness, but I knew that if I wanted to stay by her side and be of any help, I couldn't stay where I was for long. So I swallowed the lump in my throat and wiped the tears off my cheeks.
I would stay, and I would help even if it was only a little bit.
I didn't need to do much. Fetch a towel and change the water in the basin, wipe her down when the maids were out, and attempt to spoon feed her the liquid once Healer Yumi thought we could get more in her.
When Healer Yumi decided to try that, she was clear in expressing that it might not work.
"It's early, but we need to start getting more of the coconut milk into her body or she won't have enough external nutrients. When you feed it to her, do one spoonful and then wait for a moment. If she throws it back up, then we'll have to go back to the drip feeding."
I nodded to show I understood and took the bottle of coconut milk from her. This is simple but I was still nervous and I had to control my shaking hands before I started.
Sitting on the edge of the bed and angling myself so that I could get the liquid to her mouth without spilling it, I started to feed her.
I watched as liquid disappeared into her mouth, then I tilted her head back to make sure it went down. I sat patiently waiting to see if she threw anything back up, then turned to Healer Yumi to see if she wanted me to continue.
"Good, now you can do that every five minutes or so, taking a break in between each spoonful. After an hour we'll take a longer break and monitor her condition. We might try some seaweed broth if she keeps it down for an hour."
Fervently I nodded again.
I kept it up, and she kept it down. We progressed to the seaweed broth, and she did well with that as well.
Two hours after we had started her seaweed broth, her expression eased up and her breathing became deeper. It still looked like she was in pain, but I was hopeful that the worst of it was gone.
I motioned to Healer Yumi, and she came over to do a check with her magic. After she completed that her face scrunched up as if considering something. I think she looked puzzled.
"… I think we're out of the worst of it as her muscles aren't contracting anymore, but her organs are still in danger. I want you to feed her the rest of this bowl of seaweed broth that I've reheated, and then we can monitor her some more. If you want to stay here, I'll tell the maids that you're assisting with her care still so they won't kick you out. I need a nap as I've been awake all night. I'm in the room next door so if you call for me, I'll be here quickly."
Healer Yumi left, and I slowly finished spooning the remains of the broth to her. When she was finished, I gently held her hand and rested my head on her mattress.
"I like you Mari, so you have to wake up for me. I still haven't heard you laugh yet."
I must have nodded off at some point, as I woke up startled because I heard a light chuckle and felt something gently moving in my hand.
I wanted to let Mari know that I tried, that I was there for her, and that she needed to wake up. In my half asleep state I'm sure I mumbled a bit.
When I finally noticed Mari was awake, I excitedly shouted for Healer Yumi.
After that it was just a few checks from her, and then I could breathe easy about her recovery. Based on how quickly Healer Yumi said it was happening, I was almost sure that Laurelin was helping her. It was only then that my mom came to get me out of her room. Surprisingly I didn't face any serious punishment, only being told to be more mindful of my manners and not to run through someone else's hallways. Even that 'lecture' seemed forced and only done out of obligation.
The next few days I planned to always be in her room from after breakfast until after dinner. I would do everything I could to spend every waking moment with her and watch her recovery. I wanted to learn more about her as well.
"You're sure you're not uncomfortable Mari?"
"I'm positive Venna, you don't need to keep asking that. This is the third time in the same number of hours, and nothing has changed."
"I just didn't want you to hurt yourself by moving around too much."
She gave me an exasperated look. Her small and subtle expressions are probably a lot more endearing to me than they would be to anyone else. Maybe I'm the only person who notices them.
"It's only been a half a day since I woke up, and I've been in my bed this whole time. On top of that we're only playing a simple card game, hardly anything that could cause me to strain myself."
"Well, you never know. Not everyone collapses twice in three days and needs constant medical care."
That was probably too far, but I was still frustrated about everything that's happened.
"I'm sorry Venna, I didn't mean to make you worry."
"No, stop apologizing for something that isn't your fault Mari, I know that things with…"
She quickly interrupted me before I could voice out my complaints on her situation.
"I'm aware Venna, but it's not something I can control either, so the only thing I can do is pay better attention to my health and try to assuage your fears that it might happen again. It's the best I can offer. And don't think I don't care about your opinion either."
I never thought that. She seems to value my input and presence more than most people. The only person I think she might trust more is her Lady's Maid, Lizabeth. She seems like a friendly enough person too, always trying to make sure both Mari and I are comfortable while I'm here.
"Well, just know that I'm around to help if you need it. I'll probably be pestering you and making sure you don't forget to call me just Venna every day. There's not much else for me to do around the Duke's castle anyway, and my parents forbade me from visiting the city."
She turned to look out the window, suddenly seeming in deep thought about something while gazing far off. Even when her cheeks are so pronounced and her eyes are a bit sunken, her side profile is incredibly beautiful. I wonder how beautiful she'll be when her health improves. Maybe I'll get my parents to let me visit frequently.
I suddenly felt a rush of heat to my neck and face. Why does she so easily make me flustered? Maybe I'm just jealous that she'll be prettier than me when she grows up. Some of the romance stories I read talked about feelings like this being related to love, but that's not possible. I've never fallen in love before, so why now? We've only known each other for a few days, that's too quick.
I took a cautious peek toward Mari to see if she noticed, and when I saw she was still staring out the window I released the breath that I didn't realize I was holding in.
After that her recovery continued, and incredibly quickly. By the end of the third day she was eating small but full meals, her complexion was much better, and she was livelier. I knew that none of the muscles and fat she had lost would come back so easily, and her skinny appearance still bothered me, but at least she was more active and could move about more freely now.
I also managed to get a better read on her 'expressions' too, and I could sometimes tell what she was feeling. She still made it nearly impossible, but I like to think I'm probably the world's foremost expert on 'reading Mari.'
I hope that things don't go back to the way they were before this after we leave.