KENAN
I couldn't hold in the anger as I washed the quaint bathroom of our house for the third time today. I grumble under my breath as I scrub the bathtub furiously and with enough force to create a dent in the body. I was pumping my whole anger into washing the place because if I try to pump it into somewhere else I might regret it. My siblings can be so annoying most times and they just get on my last nerve.
Keila and Jeima were always looking for ways to give me more work even though they know what will happen if I do not finish up my chores and keep the house sparkling clean. All day they have been taking mud and using it to dirty the whole house and I have spent the whole day cleaning after them. I love them so much and don't like punishing them but I've had enough for the day so I grounded them and sent them to their room.
I wash quickly so I could go back to my other chores which if I'm not done with could lead to a worse day for me.
I was still scrubbing furiously when I heard the front door being slammed with enough force to bring down the house down. At first I thought it was my Mom who was the one and that could only mean she really had a bad day or my siblings had escaped from their room and started playing again but when I heard the voice my face lost all colour. I freeze completely at the sound of my dad voice.
'Could my day get any worse' I thought to myself. I guess it could then because it has officially gotten like that.
I rinse the remaining soap on the tub about to go out when I heard my name, man I'm completely done for.
"KENAN!!!" was all I heard and I was running with my life on the line to the living room knowing I was in deep soup.
I arrive at the parlour where he was pacing with a very furious and deadly facial expression. My dad and I were around the same height but I was a little taller than him. We had the same curly dark hair and stark chocolatey brown skin colour that was tanned as hell. He had dark brown eyes while I took my mom's golden brown eyes. Even though we had a lot in common I looked more like my mom. I didn't inherit any of his features and attributes and I think that pisses him off more than he admits.
He was a very hefty man but he had lost shape from costant drinking and lazying around gaining a potbelly. I on the other hand was fitter but the authority and deepness in his voice could make a whole city shiver.
"Yes Sir" I stutter visibly shaking and he faced me with a deadly glare and a scowl. I was already imagining what I would experience and it is not a good thing at all.
"Why is my living room in this form and why isn't my meal served" he asks furious and I began explaining to him in a bid to cool his temper. Even though I'm dead sure it would not work in saving me from the onslaught coming I must at least try.
"I I I... was get get getting to it sir, I was just a littl busy woth something else sir" I stutter and he doesn't let me finish before landing a deafening slap on my face. My whole vision blurs at the sheer force of the slap and my cheek heats up. I begin to see stars in my vision as Iget dizzy instantly and I stagger and fall on the ground.
"You were busy, what is your use in this house, you can't add any money to the house and the only chores you were given to do you can't even finish them. You worthless piece of shit" He screams curses I can't even say because of how bad they were at me and continue hitting me on the same ground I was with his arm. The moment he starts to get tired he searches for the best thing to use in inflicting pain on me and that space was a welcomed relief.
He finally decides to pick up the cane shaped like a walking stick used in changing the wood in the fireplace and starts whipping me. I whimper in pain as my skin begins to break and I start to bleed. The urge to cry intensifies but I wouldn't give him the joy of seeing me cry or scream in pain. I bear the pain as he continues cuussing me out through the whole beating.
Shortly into it my mom comes in and walks directly into our middle separating us. I open my eyes to see who stopped it and I felt bad the moment I saw her. I was hit with a pang of guilt knowing the fate that awaits her for doing such a thing.
"Mine please he will do whatever you want" she says pleading my dad but it was all falling on deaf ears.
"Woman haven't I warned you that whenever I'm correcting my children you shouldn't interfere" he snaps and hits her. I tried to block him and took a few beating before he pushes me out of the way and moves towards my mom. He hits her repeatedly and I tried my hardest best to stop him but I was too weak to get up. He gets tired then storms upstairs to his room grumbling under his breath.
Hot pain pour round my body as I feel my whole clothe soaked with blood from an injury from the last beating that was reopened and many other new ones that hve been inflicted on me. I lay down there for a while before mustering all the final strength in me to push myself off the floor and crawl up to mom.
Mom was on the floor wailing and I help her up groaning since my own pain was also with me but I couldn't just leave her there. She gets up and wipes her tears before walking away not even sparing me a glance or listening to me. My siblings peek from behind the stairs and my heart breaks seeing the fear and pain and most importantly the guilt in their eyes.
They might have been the main cause of all these but it wasn't their fault any of us owas been abused. I storm out the door to the shed behind the house and pick up my bows, arrows and throwing knifes. I run out the door into the forest behind my house and begin running for a while trying to ease the tension on me.
Since childhood running has always helped me ease my tension and set my mind in order. I run as pain shoots round my body from the many injuries I have gotten over the years that have refused to heal and even when they heal another round of beating would reopen them. The pain helps me to remember what I have gone through and to always learn to push through every horror of life.
I finally arrive at the pasture and the clear field where my tree is. The pasture was always filled with different creatures from time to time and I made a lot of hunts here without being noticed by those animals. It was beautiful, close to a lake and full of lush flowers and grass that made the place to be an animal pull and the base of hunting and relaxation for me.
My life has been full of pain, anger and agony for a long time so I started hunting, sparring and fighting a few years ago as a means to let out all the pent up anger and frustration and I did feel better. I was always in pain every time but I pushed through it and I became better over the years not only at the skills but even doing them through pain.
I trained regularly with the village's army when my parents were at work and on my own later in the evening when everyone went to bed so I became better than them. The Captain of the army took a liken to me due to my diligence and hard-work. He saw my anger was too much to hold in so he started training me separately to join the army when I was old enough. He said he wanted me to have a purpose to channel all my anger into. I will be joining this year when the tryout time arrives.
I train in the woods for a while and it was fun because it helped me release more tension but I was still vexed. I used the time to train my shooting practice. At first I start with the bow and arrow. Setting my target as a particular place on the trees, I practice my multiple arrows aim and trajectory.
I could do it but It needed perfection. I knock 4 arrows and aim. I take in a deep breath and let it out as I release the arrows. Time slows down as the arrows went through the air sounding like it was cutting the air with a whoosh as it hits it target. I jump in elation because this was the first time I was doing 4 arrows. I repeat it for a while until I am sure I could make it in succession.
Even though I had people better than me at arrow shooting in the army it was nice to at least to be superb at this. I train my throwing knifes also as I go round picking up different fruits that I sell for money on my own.
I started hunting as an hobby foing it for free meat dyeing my free time, then I realised we needed it as a family and it would help provide better foods for my siblings and money for me so I started hunting regularly. I check my traps and few caught bush meat that I added to my bag but I needed more so I go deeper into the woods.
I see two deer chewing on grass and quickly take cover knocking two arrows aiming for the two animals at the same time. I am placing so much faith in my talent so I take very deep breaths to clear my head before releasing the arrows. The arrows move swiftly and hit both animals on the eye and in the centre of the head.
I skip for joy as I run to put the catches over my neck. I put my bag over my shoulder and carry it all the way to my shed where I store my other fruits. I flail the bush meats and deer and put the meat in the freezer there. I smoke the few I wanted to and by evening I was done. I arrange my fruits and hides for sale tomorrow and pack the meat well before heading into the house.
I entered and the whole house was quiet. The living room was empty so I headed into the kitchen where my mom was cleaning. I walk up to the dishes and start washing. She was so deep in thought and didn't even notice me until I spoke to her.
"Hey mom" I greet and she snaps out of her thought, at first she was surprised to see me behind her but when she gets over her shock, she speaks.
"Where have you been, I've been so worried" she asks clearly worried.
"I just went to the woods to clear my head and check on my trap and I got carried away. I lost track of time and when I came back I was busy in the shed." I reply and she nods uncinsciously still not concentrating fully on me
"Your dinner is on the table, make sure to eat" she says and I nod as she goes back to what she was doing and I continue washing the dishes. When I was done I sit at the end of the table and began eating. I eat in silence for a while before speaking up.
"Are we going to continue like this mom" I ask and she looks at me. Her cheeks were swollen and had a tint of purple to them. She had a black eye and I could see the pain she was going through clearly visible in her expression. She gives me a fake smile and shakes her head.
"No love, it is just a phase your dad is going through. We will be fine" she replies and I was instantly infuriated.
"That asshole of a man is not my father, and we have been in this phase since I was 7 and now I'm 18 and you still believe it is a phase. How ironic" I reply snappily and she flinches.
"Don't say that, I gave birth to all of you for him and he is your father. You remember we weren't like this before and I can't leave him because of this" she replies pushing back tears.
"When will you see past this and realise that there is no remedy to all he has done and though change is constant he can never change. You are so blinded by your self-righteousness that you can't leave a toxic and violent marriage because of your image and you just decide to subject your child to regular abuse" I scream as my anger keeps boiling and I push my food away and storm up to me room.
I enter my room and quickly change into my nightwear before laying under my covers. Thoughts race through my mind as I close my eyes and the rise and fall of my brother's chest lulls me into the darkness of sleep. I sleep with only one wish.
My life needs a Change