"Ahhhhh… …"
In my field of vision, Adilun was completely frozen. Looking at me she was just clenched her hand wrapped in the towel. Her trembling pupils showed how flustered she was now.
She didn't even think about closing the bathroom door and appeared to be in complete panic.
I immediately tried to look away, but I couldn't take my eyes off her, as if I was in an irresistible fascination.
After coming out of the bath, her slightly flushed and immaculate skin caught my attention first. Unlike the slightly heated skin around her shoulders, her red-hot face was so lovely, and her wet hair seduced me more fatally than any other charm.
My heart was beating wildly to the point where I couldn't control it, but I somehow endured it with everything thing I have and turned my head. I knew that I could never forgive myself if I did anything inappropriate to Adilun at that moment.
"I-I'm sorry!"
"..."
Perhaps coming to her senses from my hasty apology, Adilun quickly snapped back and went back into the bathroom, slamming the door shut.
"Adilun...?"
"Yes... Yes."
"I'm sorry! Really, it wasn't something I intended to do."
"Okay, it's okay. But I'm also very confused… … Physis?"
"Yes!"
"Could you please give me my clothes… …I mean can you bring them?"
"What do you mean clothes?... I-I mean what clothes are you talking about?"
"That, the thin clothes that I wear to sleep. They should be on the bed. Could you please bring them to me?"
"Alright, Sure."
When I moved my stiff body and looked at her bed, there was a thin nightdress.
I picked up the nightdress and headed towards the bathroom, where Adilun was waiting. Oddly enough, I felt my body stiffen.
I knocked on the bathroom door.
"Adilun? I brought your pajamas."
"Ah yes."
The door opened, and she quickly took the nightdress from my hand, holding out her arm, still wrapped in a towel.
And the door closes again.
I sat down on the couch in her room, exhausted.
The image of Adilun I had seen earlier lingered in my mind, and perhaps because of that, I felt that my body was not under my control.
I knew that I had to be careful, or else I might act on my impulses. I decided to stick to the main topic for the day and leave her room as soon as possible.
* * *
[Adilun's POV]
The heat spread throughout my body, leaving me feeling bewildered.
I had anticipated his arrival, hence why I left the terrace door open, but I had not expected him to come so soon.
A mix of embarrassment and shame ran through my body, causing my body to stiffen as I struggle to figure out what to do next.
The heat on top of my head was so intense that I threw off the towel I wrapped around my body and pour cold water over my body.
A splash of cold water at least got things working, so I wrapped myself back in a towel and asked Physis to get my pajamas.
After swiftly snatching my pajamas from his hand exposed through the crack in the door, I quickly put on my pajamas and opened the bathroom door.
As I walked out of the bathroom with a somewhat awkward gait. I saw Physis sitting on the sofa in my room, closing his eyes as if meditating.
"Ah, Physis?"
"Oh, Adilun. You are done."
"Yes."
With that, the conversation ended. An inconceivable awkwardness lingered between us.
To be honest, I didn't know what to say in this situation.
I was sure there were people who didn't consider it a big deal to show their bodies to their fiancé. But that was only true in very close betrothal relationships.
There was no choice but to be different from those who fell in love from the beginning and became engaged.
Physis and I were just getting to know each other, and I was just starting to feel affection for him, so it was all too sudden.
"I… …"
"Yes… …"
"Ah. Mmm, you tell me first..."
"These are the contents recorded today. I think that they'll probably be of great help to you, Adilun."
Saying that, Physis handed over the magic tool to me.
I nodded my head with a slightly stiff gesture.
"Thanks. I will check this separately later."
And again there was an awkward silence.
'What am I supposed to say? What can I do to get past this situation casually?'
"Adilun, sorry. I didn't know you were taking a bath… …"
Physis handed me an apology with a serious expression as if he had made up his mind to apologize.
At that, I waved my hand and told him.
"Oh no! it's okay. Yes really. It was unavoidable... It was something that no one should have noticed… … So it's okay."
"still… …"
"You don't have to be like this. And you even apologized right away."
"uh… …"
"Hmm... and we are in an engagement relationship anyway. So it's okay."
I started talking gibberish to the point where I couldn't tell what the hell I was even talking about.
'What the heck I was just spat out!?'
Realizing that I immediately covered my mouth as if I had made a mistake.
But my word seemed to do something in Physis.
"It's an engagement relationship, so it's okay?"
Physis's eyes suddenly flashed dangerously, as if his rationality was slipping. I realized that I had answered something wrong.
Suddenly he grabbed my wrist violently. A slight pain rose in the side of my wrist, and my expression frowned.
"If I were to do this, would you still say it was okay?"
"… …That's… …"
I couldn't say anything If I gave the wrong answer here, I thought it would go a long way. An inner conflict crept into me.
I didn't know if he likes me or not.
Judging by the look in his eyes now… … He was clearly craving me now. Those slightly unrestrained eyes were eyes that I had never seen from him before.
Honestly, I was glad he liked me. It made me feel like a woman with charm.
However... The problem was that I couldn't tell if he was simply physically or mentally lusting after me.
I didn't want him to lust after me just for my physical appearance.
I hated it. I wanted him to love and respect me for who I was.
We were finally able to look forward, having washed away our hatred and contempt for each other, and in the process, I felt like I had fallen in love with him all too soon.
It wasn't something I hated. Because liking and being able to love someone meant that I was a normal person. It means that I had enough room in me to hold someone in my heart.
Ever since I realized I liked him, a pleasant thrill always stayed in my heart. Of course, this pleasant excitement became an unbearable flame when he danced with another woman or had a friendly conversation, but I still wanted to hold this excitement.
I hoped he also got as excited to see me as I feel. It was not just because I was a fiancée tied to an arranged marriage, but I wanted him to desire me mentally as much as he does physically.
Therefore... ...Not right now. I hoped there was at least some chance that he loves me. If that was confirmed, I would be able to surrender myself to him without hesitation.
Perhaps he interpreted my long silence as negative due to his worries, he removed his hand from my wrist and immediately apologized.
"I'm sorry for behaving violently. But I needed to say this, Adilune."
"… …What?"
I felt a slight sense of disappointment welling up inside me.
I decided to accept that disappointment as well. This disappointment must be proof that I liked him that much.
"Please don't just say it's okay. Because your body is precious. When you don't want something, I want you to shake your head and say no. I'm an idiot, so it's really hard for me to understand people's feelings. I might cross the line if you don't deny it. And that... will hurt both of us."
He gently stroked the wrist he was holding, which began to tingle. The pain disappeared as if washed away, and strange shame and heat began to fill its place.
"Anyway, I'd like to talk more, but I don't think I can. I'm sorry, Adilun. Rest well."
I nodded. I knew that too. Now, if we dragged out more time here, we would definitely cross the line.
He slipped out of my room through the door on the open terrace.
I watched him quietly, and he climbed the wall with mysterious movements, and then went back to his room.
Left alone, I could only sigh.
With obvious regret… … It was such a sigh.
Unbeknownst to me, I must have hoped that he would covet me.
A heat that wouldn't go away even with cold water began to spread throughout my body.
The fact that he wanted me... ...overjoyed me. The heat in my body became so strong that I began to shiver.
I probably won't be able to fall asleep easily tonight.
If, after the deadline, when I first ask him… … Is he and I in love?'
Please, I just hope so...