It was dark. Atsushi can't see anything. He looked around but all he could see was pitch black. Where is Oda-san? Where is he now?
He didn't move and remained there, standing at the place where he didn't know, until he heard a familiar voice calling him.
"Atsushi..."
His eyes grew bigger when he recognized the voice. His hands started to shake and his body trembled. That voice... Why is he hearing that now?
"Atsushi, why did you kill me?" The voice asked.
Atsushi raised his hands and covered them with his ears. He doesn't want to hear that voice again.
"I just want to give you a watch as a birthday present, why did you kill me, Atsushi?"
Atsushi started to panic. His head and ears hurt. He keep on whispering to himself, "Stop," "Please go away,"
But he keeps on hearing the voice. Instead of disappearing, it only gets louder as time pass by.
"I-I was just trying to protect myself from you. I didn't know that you don't have a plan to kill me. I killed you because I thought you would kill me first, I only did it to protect myself!" Atsushi yelled.
The voice echoed, still. He kept on hearing the voice until a small light appeared.
Standing under that light, he saw someone… It's the director of the orphanage where he grew up. Atsushi took a few steps back in horror and he looks so scared just staring at the director now.
Why is the director here? He is dead already.. He's dead because he killed him with his own hands—his tiger claw.
"Atsushi, don't be scared, I am not mad at you." The director said.
He didn't believe it. All the director did to him before was to torture him and made him feel like there's no place in the world where he belongs.
The director made him suffer when he's just a little kid who didn't know how to protect himself. He can't remember anything good that the director did to him. All he could remember is the director slapping and hurting him physically and mentally.
"Atsushi, can you give me a hug?"
Atsushi got bewildered. He looked at the director with confusion. The director's arms were wide open, inviting him to come and give him a hug.
Atsushi didn't move. He just stands there and looks at the director with mixed emotions.
Until he can't stop himself anymore and runs to the director with his clenched fist. He hugged the director tightly and started to ask for forgiveness.
"I'm sorry… I'm sorry, director… I'm very sorry.." he said.
Atsushi was sobbing. His voice was broken. Like a child asking for forgiveness to his own dad.
He kept on mumbling "Sorry,"
"I already forgave you, Atsushi. I hope you can forgive yourself too."
"Shouldn't you ask me to forgive you as well, director?" asked Atsushi.
The director shook his head, smiling.
"No, I don't want to ask for that. It's okay if you don't forgive me, you can hate and despise me all you want. All I want is for you to not hate yourself."
Atsushi didn't answer, he continued to hug and bury his face on the director's chest.
A couple of minutes passed by and Atsushi was still crying. The director continued to pat his head, trying to make him calm down and right after he stopped crying, Atsushi finally heard the only thing that he wanted to hear from the director.
He finally heard the word that he's been desiring to hear for so long.